Disclaimer: Neither Rurouni Kenshin nor its characters belongs to me. Sigh.

AN: I'm alive! I'm aliiiiiiivvvveeeeee…

Sorry it's so late. Work's been crushing lately. Crushing. As always, please forgive any typos.

Terms used:

Haiden – the main shrine within the shrine grounds where people pray, usually located towards the back of the grounds

Chozuya – a small pavilion at a shrine, usually a long basin of water lined with ladles. Here, people wash their hands and rinse their mouths before going to the haiden or the front porch of the honden to pray.

Note: Uh, I have no idea how long it would take a messenger bird to fly a mile (and frankly, I didn't want to look it up and ruin my fanciful notions,) so…just imagine Aoshi's messenger bird is an awesome, large hawk, fleet of wing and purpose. It is a ninja hawk. It gets where it needs to go in a day or less.

Chapter 12

Aoshi openly laughed at Kaoru's response, clasping a large hand over hers to steady her cup. She stilled, sucking in a breath, her eyes large. The warmth from his hand (or was it the tea?) traveled up her arm, leaving a tingling in its wake.

"Hm. From your reaction, is that a yes?" he teased.

"No! There'snowaythatwasnotayes!" Kaoru hissed in a rush. She blinked, eyebrows knitting as she thought about what just came out of her mouth. "Wait, what did I just say? No, there's no way that was not… NEVER MIND."

Aoshi laughed again. Kaoru hid her face in her hands, thinking, why am I such an idiot sometimes?

Aoshi reached over, gently prying her fingers from her face and brushing the hair out of her eyes. Tracing her cheek softly, he said, "I don't think I've ever laughed as much as I do with you."

Kaoru wrinkled her nose. Was that a good thing?

Aoshi, correctly reading her expression, tapped her nose and answered, "Yes, it is a very good thing."

Kaoru laughed a little bit. "I don't think I know what to expect from you anymore."

Aoshi pondered for a moment. A knowing smirk edged up his face and Kaoru prepared herself for some teasing remark. "Expect the unexpected, Kaoru. I don't imagine you expected to travel across Japan with me, and for you to enjoy my company so much."

Kaoru's mouth went dry as she struggled for something witty to say in return. He had a point, though. She hadn't expected to enjoy this trip with him so much. She hadn't thought about the towns between Tokyo and Kyoto really, much less expected to learn so much about them. She hadn't expected to see Aoshi in a new light – the same man that she had always seen, and yet completely different from anything she had ever known of him before.

# #

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Instead of going to a hot spring after lunch, Kaoru elected to journey to a local shrine via a short hike into the mountains. The way was little more than a dirt path, lined with stones on the sides as a reminder that travelers were on a mountain, and the path was not modern. Kaoru had to concentrate a little so as not to lose her footing as they went up.

Aoshi didn't ask her why she wanted to go, for which she was thankful. She wouldn't have known what to say if he had. Could she blurt out, "Well, I know how often you meditate, and it seems to bring you a measure of peace," without sounding like a stalker? And she certainly did not want to say, "Well, I was hoping to get some guidance from the gods to help me figure out what to do about you."

Definitely not that.

No, with this impromptu little pilgrimage, Kaoru hoped to gain a little clarity and direction. Hopefully. And if her small amount of luck held, she wouldn't say anything that would reveal her turbulent state of mind to Aoshi. He's really too good at knowing what I'm thinking. It must be some secret ninja technique, she thought.

"Kaoru," Aoshi called, interrupting her weird thoughts. "I'm not sure what you're thinking about, but you're making some… interesting… faces, as if I'm going to pull some secret ninja trick on you."

Kaoru turned so quickly to look at him, she caught the toe of her footwear on something, wrenching the sandal off and tipping her off-balance. She thought she was going to hit the ground, but Aoshi deftly caught her, his hands gentling on her waist as he pulled her close to him. She looked up at him wordlessly, unaware of how she was leaning against him because she was only wearing one shoe. Oh my god, does he have a ninja technique for reading minds?

"No, Kaoru, I do not have the ability to read minds." Kaoru's mouth dropped open.

Aoshi smirked, "Yes, you are just that easy to read sometimes."

Kaoru didn't seem to be able to get her mouth to work, so she settled for pulling herself free from Aoshi and spinning back around to continue on the path before realizing she had to hop on one foot. Her shoulders drooped in defeat. So much for my defiant exit.

To his credit, Aoshi said nothing, and he didn't even laugh, as he retrieved her shoe for her. Bending down, he slipped it back onto her foot. Kaoru couldn't help the rush of emotion at his nearness. Even kneeling, he was so tall she could put a hand on his shoulder, which she did, partly for balance, and partly because she really wanted to touch him again (though she was ignoring that little part as much as she could.)

Once her footwear was in its proper place, Aoshi straightened, making Kaoru realize how very small she really was next to him. And yet, she never felt insignificant. He could ignore her, if he chose to, but he often made sure to include her in whatever he was thinking. He made her feel good about herself. The thought made her smile softly.

Aoshi, critical tactician that he was (and still is,) had taken every opportunity so far on this little trip to reach out and assist Kaoru any time she stumbled. The path to the shrine was sometimes loose and a little treacherous underfoot, so it was completely natural for him to steady her. Now, he gently took Kaoru's hand and laced his fingers through hers, squeezing lightly to reassure her, which only served to elicit a blush across Kaoru's cheeks. Still, she was glad for his support as they continued walking.

He walked a step ahead of her, carefully navigating through some of the trickier areas, guiding her along after him. Each time she tripped or slipped, Aoshi balanced her easily, a pillar of quiet strength. Positive that she could not see his face, Aoshi couldn't stop a triumphant little smile from surfacing. She did not try to pull her hand away once, and that was something meaningful to him.

After some time, the trees began to thin out, and the path grew more level. They could just start seeing the rooftops of the shrine compound, nestled within the trees. The two admired the simple wooden structures as they came into view. They approached the chozuya and performed the necessary ablutions. Then they searched for the haiden, a huge, simple space open to the public for praying. There were a few workers going about their daily routine of chores at the compound: cleaning the buildings, feeding the animals in the compound, preparing the day's supplies, doing laundry.

Aoshi spotted the haiden and led Kaoru to it silently. They removed their shoes and padded across the floor to the edge of the hall. Aoshi settled down to meditate, pulling Kaoru down with him. She hadn't thought about it before, but now she was a little concerned; she had just had lunch and a mildly challenging walk, not to mention the spar earlier in the day. Could she really do this without falling asleep?

Aoshi seemed to sense her apprehension. "Don't worry. I won't meditate for long. I just need to focus my thoughts a little."

Kaoru looked dubious. Aoshi was one of the most focused men she knew. What could be troubling him? And how did she not notice?

"And of course, if you fall asleep, you can always lean on me."

Kaoru blushed, but couldn't think of anything to say to that. It was true.

Aoshi continued, "Think of me as your personal ninja pillow. Though perhaps it doesn't bear saying since that is exactly what you did at the last shrine. And you were quite comfortable that way in the carriage."

Kaoru gasped indignantly. "Apparently some ninja has forgotten who fell asleep on whom on the trip here to Kiso-Fukushima!"

Aoshi smirked devilishly. "No, I remember perfectly well."

Kaoru squeezed her eyes shut. "I'm meditating. Please stop talking."

Aoshi hummed in response.

After a minute or two, Kaoru took the quiet time to think about recent events. There were no two ways about it – Aoshi was being exceptionally open lately, and quite forward. She wasn't exactly sure when it happened, and she wasn't entirely sure how she felt about it.

Well, that part wasn't exactly true, she thought. I have one of the most handsome men I've ever seen paying more attention to me than any man has ever before. That's pretty awesome. But Kaoru also had some reservations. Could she really fall in love again so quickly? Did it mean that she wasn't really in love with Kenshin? Was she so capricious? What about Misao? What if this was just a temporary crush? What if Aoshi was simply this open with friends and she was misconstruing his familiarity?

Kaoru cracked one eye open, peeking at Aoshi's still form. Look at him, sitting there all calm and peaceful and gorgeous. I bet he's not worried about stuff like I am. Kaoru shut her eye again, huffing a little as she did so.

Aoshi's eyes popped open at the sound. He took in Kaoru's furrowed brow and annoyed expression. He could practically see the wheels turning in her head. He was content to watch her in silence, endeared by her guileless face.

He was pretty sure he knew what she was thinking about, and he was both pleased and concerned by it. Pleased because it meant that he had a chance for her affections, seeing how much turmoil she was in. Concerned because he didn't like to see her so distraught. Briefly, he wondered about the other perky female in his life. If his calculations were correct (and his messenger bird expedient,) Misao should be getting his letter later today. Aoshi wondered how she would take his intentions.

Well, he'd cross that bridge when he came to it.

After maybe ten minutes (Kaoru could have sworn it was more like an hour,) Aoshi nudged Kaoru softly. "Come, Kaoru, shall we go for a walk around the grounds instead? You seem…distracted."

Kaoru smiled, a little abashed at being so transparent to Aoshi. Still, she accepted his offer to get out of the shrine. The meditation didn't seem to be helping her all that much at the moment.

They meandered around the grounds, observing the carefully tended plants, trees, and pond. "Carefully tended" in that the groundskeepers were studious about maintaining the natural beauty and balance of their surroundings. Nothing was over-landscaped; it was all a subtle ordering of wild beauty, a meticulous preservation of nature with minimal human influence.

The quiet harmony instilled a calm wonder in Kaoru. As she gazed into the pond, glimpsing the sleek, multicolored bodies of koi between the floating hyacinth, frog bit, water lily, and water lotus plants, she wasn't worried about propriety or the burgeoning, confused feelings she had for the man next to her. She simply basked in the serene atmosphere of where she was.

At some point in their exploring, Aoshi had taken her hand again, as he had earlier in the day. Kaoru marveled at how natural it felt. Her heart tripped a little at the thought at first, but settled into a slightly dizzying thump that was she was becoming accustomed to. Her fingers tightened subconsciously as she scolded herself for thinking about troubling things in this place.

Unaware of her current train of thought, Aoshi rubbed his thumb soothingly against Kaoru's own. When she looked up at him, he gifted her with a gentle smile. Kaoru's breath caught, and she knew. In that instant, she knew that this man threatened to upset her emotional stability. Oh, who am I kidding? It's too late, she thought. I've already fallen hard, and it can only complicate things… Oh god, Misao will kill me.

Kaoru tugged her hand away, smoothing her hair behind her ears nervously. Aoshi watched her fuss. When she finished, he held his hand out for her to take. Kaoru stared at his offered hand for a long time before finally accepting it. Aoshi wrapped his fingers around hers, lacing them together again, and gave her a truly breathtaking smile. Kaoru was a little stunned – he seemed so happy by such a small gesture. She couldn't help but to give a small smile in return.

Raising one eyebrow mischievously, Aoshi pulled Kaoru to him. Caught off guard, she stumbled into his arms and found herself pressed against Aoshi's chest in an impromptu hug. He let go of her hand to wrap both of his arms loosely around her, enfolding her in his amazing warmth. She tensed up; her hands, which had been flat against his front, clenched the material of his shirt unwittingly. He simply held her, though, and she slowly relaxed against his frame, comforted by the tenderness and security he emitted. Just this moment, Kaoru thought. I'll let myself enjoy this, just for now. She let go of his shirt, smoothing the wrinkles she had made. She slowly snaked her arms around his middle, her small hands lightly clutching the back of his shirt. She rested her cheek against him with a sigh, her eyes closed, fully relaxing. Aoshi smiled, held her a little tighter, and rested his chin atop her head.

"It bothers me to see you so troubled, Kaoru." Aoshi's voice rumbled from deep within his chest. Kaoru, with her ear pressed against him, could both feel and hear his words. She let out a little giggle.

"Well, I suppose I should be glad that you seem to be in better spirits," Aoshi said, "even though it appears that you are laughing at me."

"My ear is pressed against your chest. I can feel what you're saying. It's the oddest thing!" Kaoru peeked up at Aoshi, finding him gazing down at her.

"Intriguing, I'm sure."

"Oh, be quiet."

"Do you want to tell me what is troubling you?"

Kaoru pulled away, sighing. "No, not right now."

Aoshi caught her hand again. "Whenever you need me, Kaoru, I will always be here."

Kaoru stared at Aoshi's serious face. She could only detect sincerity and – did she dare to hope? – affection in his eyes. Feeling very touched by his gentle, unwavering support, she smiled gently, her tentative plan to start distancing herself from him (emotionally) melting away.

They decided to head back to the village. As they began to walk, Kaou didn't pull away, leaving their fingers entwined.

To Be Continued…

AN: I'm so sorry to leave it here. I have a pretty fun sequence coming up, but I have not had any time to write at all, and I'm not sure when I will. It's film festival season, and in a few hours I'm off to Sundance, which is both YAY and UGH. Anyone who has had to plan a work trip for nearly a dozen people should know what I'm talking about. I'm certainly not giving up this story, but I can't promise when the next chapter will be ready. If I could just stop sleeping, I'd have a little more time…