"Potter! Malfoy!" Slughorn suddenly called from across the room, "The entire class can hear your conversation, you know. And Harry – is the a musical instrument?"
"Nnnnoo, Sir, it isn't," Harry said quickly, hiding the kazoo behind his back. "Yeah it is," Parvati giggled, "It's a kazoo, sir. Harry's got a kazoo."
"Is that a euphemism?" Pansy called from next to Draco.
"Fuck off, Parkinson," Ron whispered. Hermione slapped his writs for swearing.
"Half-blood," Draco sneered, "Getting your kicks from muggle instruments now are we potter?"
"Eh," proffesor slughorn spoke up, "why do you have a musical instrument in potionas class, Mr. Potter?"
"If he was Snape, you'd be dead, Harry," Ron whispered across the table. "I know, Ron," Harry said, "I'm not stupid. Uh, sir, it's – it helps me concentrate."
"You?" Lvendar shrieked, "It's drove the rest of us mad!" Hermione glared at Lavendar, an occurence which was becoming all to common this year. "Well then," she said at Lavendar, "Perhaps you'd better go down too the Greenhouses and ask proffesor Sprout for a pair of earmuffs!"
The classroom broke out into an uproar of chaos. Students were flinging insults at each other, and a few hexs narrowly missed the calldrons. Slughorn was trying too calm them down. "Enough!" ye shouted, "That's enough! I will not have such chaos in my class!" However, because Slughorn was not Snape, nobody listened to him until he cast a jellolegs jinks upon every member of the class.
"Fukc!" Draco yelled while he was writhing on the floor.
"F-" Ron was about to say, before Hermione glasred at him again.
"Now," Slughorn said, "While your'e all there lying on the floor, I have something to say. Just because I am not proffesor Snape does not mean that I do not reserve respect! This is a classroom, not a zoo! Nor, Mr. Potter, is it a performance area. Please givve me your kazoo. As fascinating a muggle device as it seems, I cannot allow it too continue too disrupt our class. Reducto!" He yelled at the kazoo, which promptely exploded.