Title: Perspective: Neville Longbottom
Author: Shadow Rebirth
Rating: K+
Chapter WC: 566
Story WC: 1,458
First Written: November 23, 2008
Last Edited: November 25, 2008
Posted: November 25, 2008
Summary: A collection of one-shots focusing on a character's actions through their perspective.

A/N: Next up, Neville Longbottom. He's a rather interesting character because of how he changes over the course of the HP series. There's just so much that can be done with his character...

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Perspective

Neville Longbottom
Vicious Cycle

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Neville Longbottom smiled gently as he carefully repotted a plant. His fingers worked deftly in the soil, easily avoiding harming the plant.

He had never felt more at home than in a greenhouse, surrounded by plants. When he'd been younger, it had been his refuge from the world. Even now it was a place he came to think, to let his thoughts drift off carelessly. It was the one place that he didn't have to worry about what people would think of him.

For as long as he could remember, Neville had always been compared to his parents. He'd been told how they'd been great people and powerful wizards and how, hopefully, one day he'd be just like them.

The problem was, Neville wasn't like them. He wasn't a great wizard, hell, he wasn't even a mediocre wizard. He struggled every day just to pass his classes. He wasn't a brave person either, as his peers reminded him constantly; he still wasn't sure how he'd gotten placed in Gryffindor.

It was widely known throughout Hogwarts that Neville's worst fear was Professor Snape, but this wasn't entirely true. The truth was that his worst fear was failing his parents, of being unable to live up to their memory. It was a fear he lived in everyday, a fear that lived in his every action. It made him second guess himself, made him hesitate, made him stumble. It was this fear, this nervousness, that ruined his life, but no matter what he did, it wouldn't go away.

It had become a vicious cycle.

Neville tried to be strong, he really did. He tried to stop holding himself back. But...Every time he started getting close, every time he began to master something, he would suddenly remember the Death Eaters who had tortured his parents into insanity. He would remember the power they commanded and how it had twisted them.

It terrified Neville, to be honest. It was another of his worst fears that if he did become strong, he could end up like them. That he could end up haunted by power. He didn't know if he could stand it if his parents or his grandmother ever compared him to the Death Eaters.

And so instead Neville found himself caught in limbo, fearing being weak and fearing being powerful.

It was only when he was with his plants that Neville allowed himself to be confident. Here, he wouldn't mess up. And it wouldn't matter even if he did, because no one was here to it. He finally allowed himself to relax.

After patting down the soil, Neville brushed the soil from his hands and his Hogwarts robe. He absently flicked his wand, levitating the pot, and began to move it back into the back of the school greenhouse.

At that moment, the door to the greenhouse suddenly swung open and a student poked their head in. Startled, Neville lost control of his magic and the newly potted plant crashed loudly to the ground, sending soil and broken pieces of clay flying everywhere. The young teen stared down at his project in dismay.

Meanwhile, the other student began snickering. "Merlin, Longbottom," he said. "If you're going to work in the greenhouses, at least try to be careful. Anyway, Professor McGonagall is looking for you." And then he was gone, without another word.

Neville sighed and slowly began to clean up.