Disclaimer: I do not own any rights to the TV series, Criminal Minds.
Angel
Part 12
By
N. J. Borba
Voices filtered through the fog of her mind. The only sense that seemed to be working at the moment was that of hearing. She'd gone from watching everything in the room to feeling like she was trapped again, darkness surrounding her. The voices were familiar. Penelope's sweet laugh. JJ's concern. Reid's boyish tone. Hotch's support. Rossi's jovial beat. They were all a comfort, but Emily desired to see their faces. She craved the ability to touch their hands or smile to reassure them she was still alive. Except she wasn't certain of that fact.
Before long, the mood in the room seemed to shift. Footsteps shuffled. A door opened and closed several times. It was quiet. Then more voices filled her head.
"Did she have a heart attack?" Derek's words were tinged with worry.
A calm male tone replied, this one foreign to Emily. "No, her heart is perfectly fine. Very strong in fact."
"Then why did it stop a few hours ago?" again Derek's voice trickled to her ears. His anger was brewing. "You had to revive her," he clipped. "First you tell us she's fine and that she'll wake up in twenty-four hours, which bleeds into forty-eight hours. After which time her heart stops."
"What we believe occurred," it was the calm voice again, "Is that the swelling pressing against her brain was more serious than we originally thought. It's difficult to be exact about matters dealing with such a sensitive and complicated area of the body," his explanation had Emily imagining the dubious glare on Derek's face. "The swelling finally receded, but it did so in such a quick manner that it sent her body into a state of shock. Hence the reason her heart stopped, though very briefly."
Emily heard Derek sigh. "So, is she going to wake up?" he demanded.
"In about twelve hours," the doctor replied. "Give or take."
"Right," Derek scoffed.
"Did the swelling cause any permanent damage?" this voice was different entirely. Female, curious, tired. Emily knew it was Angie.
"We don't think so," voiced the calm doctor.
Derek's groan was palpable. "You don't think so? I'm hearing a lot of believe and think, but nothing definite. And nothing different from what you told me three days ago when we first brought her here."
"Sir, I understand that this is frustrating for you," the calm voice replied. "But I assure you we have done, and will continue to do, everything possible for the patient. We have every reason to believe she'll make it through this without any lasting damage other than some slight scarring."
"Thank you, doctor," Angie's gracious voice spoke. "I'm sorry about…" her tone faded. Emily guessed she was walking the doctor toward the door.
There was a gentle hum of breath near her ear. "I love you," Derek whispered. "But I need you to wake up so I can tell you. Just for a second, Emily," he begged. "Just so Angie and I, your mother… all of your friends that have been in and out the last few days. We all just need some small sign that you're going to be okay. Then you can sleep as long as you want. I'll even take you home, tuck you in and crawl into bed beside you. Let you sleep for days if you wish."
She tried to respond, tried with all her might. But nothing happened. And soon even her hearing was swallowed by the darkness.
xxx
It happened in a rush.
The weight of her body thrust back into the consciousness of her mind. Her limbs felt massively heavy and her head throbbed. Both eyes blinked open, though the left only made it to half-mast. Dim light pierced her vision, far too bright for her weary senses. The sensation eased a little as seconds ticked by. The room slowly came in to focus around her. It was the same space she recalled from before, except her perspective was very different.
"I'm in the bed," she whispered, though she wasn't sure if she'd made a sound.
Her tongue felt like sandpaper. And Emily was pretty sure someone had stuffed a large ball of cotton down her throat. She felt liked she'd just woken up after a very bad drinking binge. Pushing that thought out of her head, she spotted two figures in the room. Derek was slumped over in a chair, his head hanging off one side in a very uncomfortable looking manner. But she was just glad to see him getting some rest.
Angie was on the other side; bent forward, cheek resting against the bed near Emily's left hand. Her eyes were closed and a soft puff of breath escaped her lips. Emily was pulled nearly twenty-four years into the past, to a similar hospital bed and a sleeping girl in her arms. She lifted her hand with a lot of effort and gently placed it against Angie's cheek. It was warm and soft, much the same as the baby she'd welcomed into the world all those years ago.
"Wake up," Emily whispered.
The girl groaned and shifted a little, but remained asleep.
A thought came to Emily, the memory of something Angie had told her in confidence. "Wake up, wake up you sleepy head," she beckoned to the girl again.
"I'm still tired, mommy," the girl whispered. Angie's eyes sprang open, disoriented for a moment. Then the memory of Derek's late night call brought it all back. She'd returned to the hospital and hadn't left Emily's side for nearly ten hours. She kept her head resting against the comfy bed, but her eyes locked on the woman starring down at her. "Emily?"
Dry laughter emitted from Emily's lips, still raspy from her prolonged nap. "Did I miss the Christmas gathering you had planned?" Emily asked.
Angie's eyes brightened as she sat up. "We sort of had that gathering here." Her head turned toward the man asleep in the chair across from her. "Derek," she called to him.
"Hmm?" he bolted upright, smacking his lips and blinking rapidly. "I was just resting my eyes," Morgan began to make excuses, but stopped when he spotted Emily. "Or maybe I fell asleep and am dreaming right now," he whispered, pulling his chair closer and grabbing Emily's hand. "You're awake?"
"Brilliant deduction," Emily grinned. "Now, can I get something to drink?"
Derek grabbed the ice water cup they kept bringing in hopes of Emily waking. He held the straw for her. "Small sips," he instructed. "Doctor's orders."
She sipped according to the rules. "Didn't think you cared much for the doctors around here," Emily quipped. Despite her good mood at the moment, her head hurt a lot and she winced a little against the pain.
"Not my favorite people," Morgan wondered how she knew that as he watched her grimace. "But I think I should go find one now."
"Wait," her right hand limply gripped his, stopping him from leaving. "I think we should do it."
His brows rose. "Uh, Emily… your daughter's sitting right here. You might want to keep the conversation clean," Derek winked.
"No," she responded. "Well…" a slow smile came over her features in spite of the headache brewing behind her left eye. "Hopefully that, too… soon," Emily arched her brow, but immediately regretted it for the spike of pain it caused. She did her best to fight back the discomfort of her injuries, and stayed on track. "I meant the two of us living together with Declan," she clarified, "Or at least with Resi."
Morgan stared blankly at her for a moment, this time very curious as to how she knew what he'd been considering. "I think I better find that doctor, because I fear there may be a bit of brain damage going on up there," he waved a finger at her forehead.
Emily's smile remained. "I love you."
"Now I'm really worried," Derek replied, edging away from the bed.
"Wait," again she stopped him. "I know it's strange, but what makes more sense," Emily posed. "Drinking myself to death or the two of us being happy?"
Her words cut through him like a knife, so honest he wanted to praise her for them. "Well, obviously option number two," Derek replied. "But…"
"But what?" Emily didn't allow him to continue. She sensed what was making him hesitate, and what really had him running toward the door. "Does the idea scare you?" she persisted; not seeming to care that Angie currently had a front row seat to their unique relationship. "Because it scares the crap out of me," Emily admitted.
His heart thumped rapidly as he moved back to her side. "Yes, it scares me," Derek let her know, again curious. "But not nearly as much as almost losing you." He bent to kiss her gently on the right cheek. "I love you, too," he whispered.
xxx
Emily underwent so many tests she thought they were going to run out of doctors and nurses to perform them. And most of her BAU family was in and out all day. They did their best to keep visits to a minimum, but Emily was actually glad to see them. Scott returned as well, briefly letting her know how glad he was to see her awake. The only person she hadn't seen yet was her mother. Emily wasn't terribly surprised, though. She knew it was a lot easier making confessions to unconscious people than wide awake ones.
Garcia and Reid had managed to usher Angie and Morgan out, insisting they get coffee, which left Emily alone with one person. She smiled at the boy who was standing across the room by the window. "Come here," she called to him.
Declan did as asked, standing stiffly at her bedside. "Hi," he spoke softly.
She smiled again, recalling how snuggly he'd been before. Her hand reached up to touch his shoulder and she was grateful when it didn't go through him. "You're not going to hurt me, I promise," Emily tried again to get him closer.
He finally caved, sinking down on to the bed and hugging her. "I thought I was going to lose you, too," the boy sniffed.
Emily kissed the top of his head, hugging him one-armed. "I'm fine," she assured him, watching as he sat back. "Are you okay?"
The boy shrugged. "I'm worried that I'll be a bad person when I grow up, like my dad was," he confessed.
Those words had already been heard, but they broke Emily's heart again. "Not possible," she placed a hand against his knee. "You're nothing like him. But, there's one thing you should know about your father. He loved you more than anything. I know he was strict with you and didn't show his love the best way. But you are the best part of him, Declan."
He smiled bashfully. "Did you know my friend Danny was adopted by his parents when he was seven?"
"I did," she'd done research on just about everyone at Declan's school, wanting to assure he was safe there. "They adopted a little girl a few years back. Danny's sister, Anna."
"That's right," Declan nodded. "They're still foster parents, too, and…"
She sensed he was hesitant and made things easier for him. "You can tell me, buddy. Anything."
"They said they'd like for me to come live with them," the boy revealed. "Danny and I bunk together at school. We bonded over being adopted and he's my best friend. We're already like brothers. And his parents are real nice."
"And you could stay in Richmond," Emily caught on quick. "Stay at your school, be close to your friends."
He nodded again. His blue eyes met hers. "Is that okay?"
"I think it's great," Emily agreed.
He smiled brighter. "Will you visit me?"
"So much you'll be sick of me," she replied.
Declan gave her a gentle hug before jumping off the bed. "Can I go call them now?" There was a renewed twinkle in his eyes. "Penelope's been staying with me at your place and she's waiting in the hall for me. She'll make sure I'm okay."
With a nod, she agreed, touched that the boy was so considerate of her feelings. Emily watched as he exited the room. Derek entered seconds later. She guessed he'd gotten his coffee to go and had camped outside her door waiting to be let back in. "Hey," he greeted.
"Hi," she spoke a soft reply.
Morgan sat down on the bed next to her. "He told you about wanting to live with Danny?"
"Yep," Emily tried not to sound upset. "I should have figured. What kid would want to live with me over his best friend? I'm happy for him, really."
"Who you trying to convince?" Derek inquired.
She sighed. "It's silly. I don't even have my life together at the moment. Bringing a kid into it would've been ridiculous."
Derek nodded along with her. He ditched his coffee on a nearby table then kicked off his shoes and stretched himself out on her bed. Morgan was careful of the monitoring wires and the IV in her hand as he settled beside her. He was glad when she rested her head against his chest. "If it's any consolation," he whispered. "I'd still like to move in with you."
"That's not a consolation prize," Emily immediately let him know. "It's a gift," she insisted. "One I'd like delivered soon. As in, when can I leave this dreadful place?"
"Doctors say all your test results are normal," he reported. "Which I find hard to believe since you've never been normal as long as I've known you," Derek teased. He received a powerful swat against his chest. Her hands certainly worked fine. "Seriously, they said you might be released in as little as twenty-four hours," Morgan concluded.
Emily scoffed, "Isn't that what they said about me waking up?"
They both laughed until they drifted to sleep.
xxx
"Did I tell you forensics finally located Doyle's bullet embedded in the roof about twenty yards from where he shot you?" Derek asked as easily as if they were discussing a recent movie release. "The snow finally melted enough for them to find it."
Her head shook. "Still can't believe I was that lucky," Emily reflected. Just twelve hours after being released from the hospital she was relaxed in the large Jacuzzi tub in her bathroom.
"Neither can I," he voiced. "Almost like you had guardian angels watching over you."
That idea seemed absurd to her, and yet, Emily couldn't help think of Matthew and John.
Warm bubbles soothed her tired and sore body. But it was a pair of hands gliding their way up her thighs that caused Emily to grin. She glanced across the tub to where Derek sat, naked and wet. "Don't get any bright ideas about this going any further, mister," she gently warned. "You heard what the doctors said about strenuous activity for the next few weeks. And I still have a killer headache going on," Emily informed him with an apologetic smile.
"Okay, but this is the only time I'll allow that headache excuse to fly," he conceded, letting his hands drop away.
She closed her eyes for a moment, savoring the last bit of heat from the bathwater. "This is a lot nicer than the last time we bathed together," Emily noted. It was difficult to recall that shower in which he'd attempted to sober her up. It felt like a lifetime ago, a lifetime she hoped was behind them for good.
"It is," Morgan agreed.
Emily sat up. "But I'm afraid I'm turning in to a prune here," she pointed out.
Derek took that as his cue. "Don't move yet," he stood, stepped out of the tub and toweled off. Then he slipped on a pair of boxer briefs and some sweat pants before grabbing another towel for Emily. He helped her stand, wrapped the towel around her, and then lifted her into his arms.
"My legs aren't broken," she protested, though minimally.
He grinned, kissing her on the lips as they made their way in to her room. "I know, but this is much more fun than walking. Isn't it?" Derek didn't hope for an answer as he deposited her on to the bed. He stood in front of her, carefully drying her hair while being mindful of the injuries to her face. It still amazed him that after everything she'd been through the last week, she was home and seemingly fine aside from the scars and bruising.
She stared at his chest as he toweled off the rest of her body with equal care. "I could get used to this."
"So could I," Derek kissed her again. Then he slipped his t-shirt over her head and tucked her in to bed. "I'm jealous," he said, plopping down on his belly next to her.
"That I get to lounge around all day?" Emily frowned. "Trust me, I'd rather be chasing bad guys," she let him know. "Or doing other things of a sexual nature with you as my willing and able partner," she purred.
Morgan swallowed. "That's just mean," he pointed a finger at her. "You are a cruel woman. Although, I was referring to the fact that I was jealous of my shirt since it's gotten to touch a lot more of you than I have lately," he admitted. Their lips met again. Derek's hands moved from her shoulders, around to the back of her neck and then upward to push damp hair away from her face.
"Ouch," Emily pulled back as his fingers pressed against the stitches above her eyebrow.
"Sorry," Derek winced in sympathy. "I forgot, doctor's orders," he mumbled disappointedly. "I hate doctors."
"Me, too," she agreed. "Except for Reid, he's all right." Emily situated a stack of pillows behind her back. "We actually had a really nice talk while I was still at the hospital. Cleared the air about me telling him Angie was my cousin. I think it might take a little more time for that wound to heal, but he's agreed to keep meeting with me for our private rehab sessions." She watched Derek as he lay there quietly and listened. "We haven't talked much about that."
He shrugged. "You're talking to Reid about it. That's a good thing," Morgan acknowledged.
"I want to talk to you about it, too," she bravely said. "I know I've been resistive, hoping to protect you from all of my issues, and I'm still wary. But, I really want this to work, Derek. You and me," Emily took his hand. "All we've really talked about the last few days are pent up sexual desires and what we want to eat for our next meal."
Derek nodded. "I thought we should take things easy for a while considering you nearly died. You don't need any stress right now."
She smiled. "I appreciate that, but some things need to be said. Addiction isn't something that just goes away, not even for a little while. I'll always be an alcoholic."
"I know that, Emily."
"But I'm going to try my hardest to stay sober. And I'm going to accept that I will probably always be confused by life."
"Aren't we all?" he flashed an encouraging smile.
"I'm not perfect," she added.
"I know that, too," Morgan replied, pointing to the stitches above her eyebrow. "But lucky for you, I find scars on women to be very sexy."
Her head shook. "Why do you always do that? I'm trying to be serious, and you always transition to sex."
Derek sighed in frustration. "I wouldn't say always. Besides, you just did the same thing to me a few minutes ago," he pointed out. Morgan took a deep breath. "I know you're not perfect, Emily. I don't want you to be perfect. I want you to be the smart, generous, loving, and yes, sexy-as-hell woman that I've come to know and love these past few years," he insisted. "You're alive, you're home. And whatever you tell me, however many fights you pick, it's not gonna make me leave. I'm in this with you, forever," Derek vowed.
"Me, too," she squeezed his hand.
A cell phone rang from across the room, interrupting their conversation. Morgan reluctantly left the bed and fished the phone from his jeans, which had been tossed aside in favor of their bath. "It's JJ," he said before answering.
"That can't be good," Emily whispered while listening to the short, one-sided conversation.
When the call was over, Derek's face revealed the ugly reality of the situation. "Duty calls."
xxx
Less than a half hour later, Derek reentered the bedroom fully clothed and ready for work. "Found you a babysitter," he announced.
Emily groaned in protest. There was a tower of books by her bed. A fully charged cell phone rested on the nightstand. Plus there was a basket of healthy, non-perishable snacks within reach. And Resi was curled into a very small ball beneath Emily's left elbow. "I'm perfectly capable of walking to the bathroom, and I have all this stuff," she waved a hand, grateful that he'd provided it all. "I don't need a babysitter."
"Not even one with hot cocoa and candy canes?" Angie asked as she stood in the doorway holding two paper cups from a local café. A purple and green tote bag hung off her right arm and was stuffed full of magazines and other goodies.
A smile came to Emily's lips, despite her objections a moment ago. "I might have to make an exception in this case," she held a hand out for the chocolaty drink.
Derek chuckled. "Glad you're so easily swayed by chocolate," he kissed her on the cheek. "And with any luck I'll be back in time to ring in the New Year with you."
"You better," Emily chided in a not-so-serious tone. "I love you."
He grinned. "You have no idea how strange it is to keep hearing those words come out of your mouth."
"Guess I should stop then," she playfully teased.
"Don't you dare," Derek kissed her on the lips one last time. "Love you, too."
Angie deposited the extra cocoa cup in to Emily's waiting hands. Then she watched the older woman. She noticed how Emily's eyes remained on the doorway as Derek grabbed his cell phone and exited the room. Her eyes stayed on the doorway even after they heard the door downstairs close. "You miss him already, don't you?" the girl asked. She settled herself on one end-corner of the bed, stirring her steaming cocoa with a peppermint candy cane.
"Nah," Emily shrugged.
"He really loves you a lot," Angie wasn't buying her mother's act. "That was pretty evident to me in Richmond. He was so worried about you he convinced the medical chopper pilot to fly you out of there during that horrible snow storm," she recalled.
"Really?" she hadn't heard that story.
"Yep," Angie nodded.
"You know… Reid's probably going on the same trip," Emily pointed out. "Won't you miss him?"
"Shoot," the girl lamented. "I forgot about that. I'm not so sure I like this job of yours."
Emily regarded the young woman, worried about her. "Sit closer," she patted the spot beside her. Angie seemed a bit reluctant, and Emily didn't want to force the girl. But she hoped to nurture the closeness they'd shared while locked away. "Are you doing okay after what happened with Doyle?" she finally asked as Angie sat next to her, their shoulders touching.
The girl shrugged. "I guess." Several seconds stretched between them. "Not really, at least not in some ways," she admitted.
"What ways?" Emily tried to get her to open up further.
"My apartment," Angie replied. "I don't like being there alone."
One of the last things Emily ever wanted was her daughter to feel like a victim. But it wasn't something she could change now. "You could stay here for a while if you'd like. I have an extra room down the hall," Emily put the offer out there. "It'll get easier with time," she assured the girl. "But for now, you don't have to be alone."
"It would still be close to school," Angie noted.
"School?" Emily was intrigued. "So, you're going back?"
"I am," Angie said as she sipped her cocoa. "One thing Doyle made me realize is that I want to help put criminals like him behind bars. And I'd rather do that from a courtroom than being out on the street like you. I'm not sure how you face situations like that day after day," she shuddered a little.
A weary sigh escaped Emily's lips. "It's difficult," she replied. "However, the people we help, the way my team came to help us, that's what makes it worth it. Reuniting parents with a lost child, or bringing peace of mind to a family after the death of a loved one… that's why we do it." She put an arm around Angie's shoulders, no longer worried about how the girl would react. "I think it's great that you want to follow in my footsteps by going into law enforcement, sort of."
Angie smiled. "Hopefully I won't have to use my Karate chop skills much in the courtroom."
"You never know, those judges can be difficult," Emily quipped.
They both laughed as Angie reached for her bag and dumped out the contents. Angie snatched up one of the travel magazines she'd brought along. "I figure traveling is something I can do in the summer when school's out. But I need your help to figure out the best places to go for shopping and sightseeing in Europe."
"Shopping?" Emily was surprised. "I didn't think that was your thing?"
"It's not, which is why I need your help," Angie explained. "My dad is a history professor, so I never really stood a chance of learning girly things from him. I don't know much about clothing, poetry, romance, or cultural stuff. But I hear Europe is very romantic. I might even ask Spencer to join me."
Emily pretended to pout. "I assume that means I've been bumped off the trip roster?"
"No," Angie quickly responded. "I do want you to join me for the trip, just… maybe not all of it."
"Understandable," Emily smiled.
The two of them flipped through glossy pictures for a while before the doorbell rang. Angie jumped off the bed, leaving Emily with the cat. "Are you expecting someone?" Emily asked Resi, watching the gray cat stretch and yawn. "The only people I care about are all on a case or downstairs answering the door." Emily was momentarily worried about Angie answering her door alone. But the fear subsided when Angie reentered the bedroom followed by their unexpected guest.
Elizabeth stood there in her perfectly ironed slacks and navy blouse. She glanced around the space without a word. Angie watched the two stubborn women and decided they needed some privacy. "I'm going to go… feed the cat," she declared, dashing over to scoop Resi up and exiting the room before either woman could stop her.
Emily grinned. "She's a smart kid, but subtlety is obviously not her strongest quality."
"I still can't believe she's your…" Liz trailed off, still working her eyes around the room. "That you actually have a…" again she wasn't quite sure of her words. "Or that I'm a…"
"Grandmother?" Emily finally offered up a choice.
The elder Prentiss nodded. "Right. That's the word," she crossed her arms over her chest and moved toward the large window in the room. "Nice view," Elizabeth noticed. She spun around and faced her daughter. "I'd like to have a relationship with her, Angie, if that's all right?"
"I think that's something you should discuss with her," Emily suggested.
"Yes, of course," Liz agreed. "I just thought I should talk to you about it, in case you were against that sort of thing."
Old patterns emerged again as Emily mumbled, "Not like I could stop you."
Liz's eyes finally settled on Emily. "Contrary to what you may think, I didn't come here to argue with you. I've actually been worried about you," she admitted. "Seeing you in the hospital was… well, it brought back a lot of memories of your father that I thought I'd dealt with long ago."
"Never talking about them is not the same as dealing with them, mother," Emily blurted out. She felt bad, though, recalling the way her mother had seemed to so easily unburden herself at Emily's bedside. "I'm sorry," she added, hoping that her first step would help her mother take one as well.
"What for?" Elizabeth asked with caution.
"For being a brat," Emily sighed. "For blaming you when I really needed to take a look in the mirror. I can't keep blaming genetics and whatever else for what I've done with my life. The drinking is my problem, not daddy's. I'm an adult who hasn't taken very good control of her life. That's on me, not you or daddy. But I'm getting help," she avowed. "And maybe it's too late for us to have any kind of relationship, but it's not too late for Angie and me. Or you and Angie. So, I hope you do pursue something with her."
"Emily," the name was pushed past Liz's lips with equal weight of forgiveness and regret. "I don't think it's ever too late," she moved closer to her daughter's side, close enough to brush the back of her fingers against Emily's cheek. "Your father is gone, but you're still here. He was never able to take this step, but I'm very glad you are. I'm so proud of you."
Battling against the tears in her eyes, Emily took her mother's hand. "You have no idea what it means to me to hear you say that."
Elizabeth kissed her daughter's hand. "Maybe it's not too late for us either," she fished.
"Maybe not," Emily concurred.
"I should let you rest," Liz said as she stepped toward the door. "But your father would like to come visit you. He's been out of town on business these last few weeks. He'll be back next Friday morning. And I thought maybe the two of us could bring you some dinner, a simple pasta dish, perhaps," she suggested. "I assume enough for four, since Derek will be here?"
Emily nodded. "You assume correctly."
"So that would be agreeable to you?" Elizabeth sough clarification. "For the four of us to have a meal next Friday?"
"Yes, mother," she nodded again; almost amused by the amount of effort it took her mother to say those words. "I'd like that."
xxx
Resi ran back inside and leapt on the bed. The cat walked in a circular pattern for several seconds before snuggling against Emily's elbow again. Angie poked her head in. "Have I left sufficient time for you to recover from granny Liz's visit?" the young woman asked. "I assume all tears have been dried, or walls have been cleaned from the mudslinging?" she ventured further in to the room clutching a book in her left hand.
"Did you just call her granny Liz?" Emily couldn't help laugh.
The girl nodded. "I'm trying out a few things," she said, making her way over to the bed. "Grandmother is just far too formal for me," Angie stuck her tongue out to show her disgust of the term as she crawled back to her place beside Emily on the comfy queen bed. "I've never had grandparents. All mine died before I turned three."
"Well, I apologize in advance that mine get to be your only exposure to grandparents," Emily quipped.
"You know, speaking of names…" Angie placed the book on her lap as she looked to Emily. "I was wondering if maybe I could start calling you mom instead of Emily." She watched the older woman and waited as an awkward silence filled the room. "You know what, forget it. It's too soon, right?" Angie tried to shake it off. "I don't want to push you. The last thing I want is for you to start regretting ever having me." Silence hung thick in the room again. "Was it too soon to make that joke?" Angie finally asked.
Emily laughed so hard she cried. "No," she sniffed. "Not at all. I'm just so happy you inherited my sense of humor. I'm glad I didn't get some snobbish kid."
"I think that was a compliment," Angie shrugged.
"Definitely," Emily assured. "So, this mom business…" she screwed up her nose a little in doubt. "You sure about that?"
"Pretty sure," Angie replied, though she was still worried about Emily's reaction to it.
A slow nod came from Emily. "If that's what you want," she nonchalantly agreed. "I just wish you hadn't shown up at such a bad time," Emily lamented, but quickly realized the mistake of her words. "I meant, for you… because you really shouldn't have to deal with all my shit. Or with the fact that you have a mother who swears."
Angie chuckled. "I'm not sorry about my timing."
"No?" Emily admired the girl's confidence, envied it actually. "Because this isn't going to be easy. I'm an addict, and I always will be." Her thoughts drifted to the past again. "But I want you to know that I never took a drink when I was pregnant with you. Never," she insisted.
A pleased smile upturned the corners of Angie's lips. "Then maybe my presence in your life now will have the same effect."
"The sense of humor is certainly mine," Emily reiterated. "But you're way too optimistic to be mine or John's kid."
Angie chuckled softly at that. A quiet settled around the room again as she picked up the book she'd lifted from a shelf downstairs. "I found this when you and granny Liz were talking and I was pretending to feed the cat," she kept up the grandmother joke. Angie flipped through the book and pulled out a picture. "This fell out."
Emily instantly recognized her worn copy of James Joyce's Dubliners. She more easily recognized the tattered photograph of her and her friends. "That's Matthew," she pointed out.
"And you, and John," Angie nodded. "When I was twelve my dad took me to this tacky salon at the mall and," she shuddered. "They butchered my hair," she ran a finger over John's figure in the picture. "I actually looked a lot like he does here. My hair was a little longer, though. But not much. Thankfully it grows fast."
The joy of learning more about her daughter brought a smile to Emily's face. "It's still hard to believe they're both gone now." She let go a heavy sigh, turning to regard Angie. "You mentioned a while back that it hadn't been a very good year for me, losing both friends so close together. But having you here has certainly helped this year end much better than it began. We can make all the jokes you want, but I am very glad to have you back in my life."
Angie felt a sense of pride she'd never known before. "Do you ever think about having kids?" she asked. "I mean, other than me." Her shoulders rose. "I don't know why, but I was just thinking that if you did I'd have a sibling twenty-four years younger than me. That would be pretty wild."
"It's not going to happen, so don't worry," Emily replied, flipping through her dog-eared book and landing on her favorite story in the collection.
"I didn't mean wild as a bad thing," the girl explained herself. "I think you and Derek would have a pretty cute kid together. Derek would be a great dad. He already has a dad quality."
The subject matter made Emily cringe a little. "I'm too old," she protested.
"No, you're not."
"I'm almost forty."
"So, all the celebrities are having babies in their forties," Angie dismissed that as a valid reason.
Emily was finally starting to realize how good her daughter was at cross examination. "I'm not a celebrity," she pointed out.
"You have an answer for everything," Angie noted. "Don't you want to know what you missed by not raising me?"
"I've talked to your father," Emily said. "Dirty diapers, late night crying, teething tantrums, teenage hormones and college tuition fees. Nope, I'm good, thanks."
Angie laughed. "I think you'd be a good mom."
"Right," Emily's eyes rolled. "Because the first time you and I met I told you to get lost. Really great mom material right there."
"That's not true," Angie adamantly protested. "You and Derek put too much stock in first meetings. Besides, the first time we met you took care of me for several hours. Then you realized you wanted me to have a better life than you could give me. So you took me somewhere safe, to someone you trusted. And you wrote a note on my behalf, a note that I've treasured and carried with me all these years," Angie pointed out. "That's the best first meeting I ever could've hoped for."
"Way too optimistic," Emily echoed her earlier sentiment even as she brushed Angie's bangs to one side. "There's something else I did the first time we met back then. I kissed you just like this," she leaned over and softly kissed the girl's forehead. "And I told you how much I loved you."
The girl smiled. "I love you, too, mom."
Unprepared for that first time, Emily felt tears well. "Stop making me cry," she carefully dabbed around her bruises. "The tears are causing my eye to sting." Emily showed her daughter the page she'd opened to, focusing on a slightly less emotional subject. "Have you ever read this?"
"The Dead?" Angie noticed the title. "No," her head shook. "But haven't we dealt with that subject enough lately?"
Emily handed the book to Angie and settled against her pillows, one hand petting Resi. "Consider this part of your cultural lesson. I'm sure your father stuck to reading you bedtime stories out of history novels. But this is classic literature. And you're going to read it to me, because I'm too tired to do it myself." She closed her eyes.
"Hmm," Angie was non-committal, though she took the book in hand. "If I do this, you have to promise you'll bake cookies with me some day," she made a counter offer. "They actually make cookie dough that you can buy already prepared. You just have to bake them. We probably couldn't mess that up too badly."
"You drive a hard bargain, Ms. Prosecutor," Emily joked. "But, I agree to your terms."
Satisfied, Angie began to read, "Lily, the caretaker's daughter, was literally run off her feet…"
xxx
There was movement in the dark room. Then the bed shifted. For a second Emily thought it was Resi, but when an arm settled against her waist she opened her eyes. Derek lay beside her, stripped down to his boxer-briefs. He hadn't even bothered to pull the covers back, lying atop them. "I didn't hear you come in," she said.
"Sorry," Derek's voice replied, soft and distant.
"What's wrong?" Emily turned a little to face him.
"Nothing," he sighed, pulling away and finally taking time to climb beneath the fluffy white comforter. "I'm sorry I woke you, it's just been a really long three days and…" Silence filled the small expanse between them for a moment. "We were too late, Emily. There was nothing we could do. She'd been dead for several hours by the time we found her."
She swallowed a lump, having kept tabs a little on the case via Garcia. "I'm sorry."
He rested his head against a pillow, eyes aimed her way. "It hit pretty close to home with what happened to you and Angie recently." His breathing evened out a little as he placed a gentle hand against her warm neck. "How are you both doing?"
"Good," Emily spoke confidently, hoping to buoy his spirits. "Well, my head hurts, but no surprise there." She shrugged one shoulder. "And, uh… Angie's kind of moved in. I guess I didn't really discuss that with you. She's been a little freaked about being alone at her place, so…"
"That's good," he cut her off. "I think it'll be nice for the two of you, help foster more of that mother daughter bond," Morgan insisted.
Emily smiled. "She already cajoled me into making cookies with her and we've planned a pretty extensive European trip for this summer. Hopefully I can get the time off." She paused a moment. "And she called me mom the other day. It hasn't quite stuck yet, but... I kind of hope it does."
Derek let his fingertips caress the fine hairs at the back of her neck. "I'm happy for you," he let her know. "Let's just hope she doesn't invite Reid here for any sleepovers."
Her face contorted. "Eww," Emily shivered, slapping his hand away. "Why did you feel the need to paint that picture for me?"
"Sorry," he chuckled.
That small bit of laughter from him delighted her. "I missed you."
He kissed her softly. "Missed you, too."
"There's one other thing I should tell you while you're in a decently relaxed mood," Emily primed. "My parents are having dinner with us next Friday." She watched him for a moment, worried about his mute response. "Does that scare you?"
"Very much so," he finally answered. "But I'm learning to accept the fact that life is scary. And also worth embracing," Derek pressed his body against her again, wrapping his arms about her waist. Being mindful of her injuries, he softly kissed the unharmed side of her forehead. "Night," he whispered.
"Goodnight," she echoed.
The End
Thank you all for reading! It's been a pleasure writing for you. Maybe we can do this dance again some day soon.