Okay, guys, here u have it. Thanks for all your kind reviews. This is the last regular chapter, but there is gonna be an epilogue to it. I hope you like the outcome of the story. Please let me know.

Disclaimer: I own Ann, and the family as you see it here. The wonderful Ryan Wolfe belongs to CBS.

Chapter 17

Duke looked at Ryan, Ryan looked back. Inside, he cursed. Just why did his father had to come out of this stupid room the exact same moment when Ryan was close to crying for the first time in twelve years. Oh, what the heck. Ryan didn't care anymore. He just said, "How's she doing?"

Duke answered, "She's shaken, but she'll be alright. For now, she's sleeping."

"Good. I'll come see her later." Ryan said and turned away to walk into his room when Duke suddenly asked:

"Can I talk to you for a second?"

But Ryan shook his head, "I don't think there's anything left to talk about. You wanna talk, you go see Justin. I'm sure you two can spend hours and hours talking and hugging…."

He was still hurt by what he had seen… two days ago? He didn't know for sure how long he had been out. But anyways, he hadn't forgotten that moment when his father had hugged this guy, all worried about how he would get over this trauma, while he had nothing but scorn for his own son. But… while Ryan had never, not once in his life, experienced a true father-son hug, deep inside he felt it couldn't be much different from the hug Ron had given him earlier. Actually, during those last twelve hears, even Ron hadn't hugged him that much. But Ryan knew it wasn't because Ron didn't care for him, or tried to make him a hard man. It was mainly because Ryan had, after having been thrown out, for a long time shied away from any body contact with other people. After therapy, it had become alright again, but Ron still respected his boundaries. But if Ryan ever needed a hug, Ron would be there. That much Ryan knew. So, actually… should Duke just go and hug that guy again. Ryan didn't care too much.

He proceeded to walk back to his room when Duke said, "Thank you for saving my wife's life."

Ryan didn't turn around, but only said, "Well, she is my mother. And sacrifice my life for saving someone else's is my job."

"How's your shoulder?"

"Why would you care?"

Duke sighed, "You know, I'm trying to talk to you, here."

"I noticed that. Can I go now?" He walked away, but then he heard Duke say:

"I know I was wrong about you. Your mother told me what happened in the sugar mill. That you shot the guy although you were almost unconscious from the blood loss. And that it was one hell of a good shot, even with your right hand. Not bad, I gotta admit."

"Was that it?" Ryan didn't want compliments. At least not that sort. He knew it could have gone wrong. If he had missed the shot, his mother would have died. And he too. It had been pure luck. Not more.

"No… I… I want to apologize. For putting you down earlier this week. I know now that you are a good criminalist, and a good cop. I should have trusted in you more. I'm sorry."

Now, Ryan turned around, "Thank you. Anything more?"

"Like what?"

"Well if you don't know…" He should probably stop waiting for his father to apologize for his childhood; it would never happen. "Can I go now?"

"What do you want?"

"Well, if you don't know…"

"You want to hear that I'm sorry for throwing you out? For putting you in your place?"

"Not if it is a lie." Ryan leaned against the wall giving his father a look. "But if you do mean it, then yes, this is what I want. Or at least an explanation. And I think I deserve to know why all that happened. Why you treated me like crap. And don't come at me with this 'I wanted to make a man out of you' talk."

"Okay. I'm not sorry for what has happened back then. You deserved it. You're my son, and you owe me obedience, and I think I've told you that often enough. Now for the explanation. I wanted to make you strong. When I was your age, I mean, the age you had back then, my dad was doing the same to me. Worse actually. He had two sons that he wanted in the army. But when your uncle refused, he treated me even harder to make sure at least I would follow his footsteps. It didn't hurt me. It taught me a lot. And I just wanted to make you as strong as my father made me. And now, I see that I've reached that goal."

Ryan almost laughed, "No, you didn't. What you see here, was all Ron. Not you. You watch the scars on my back, this was what you did. Nothing more."

"You have never seen my back, Ryan. Because let me tell you one thing; I was always careful not to leave any marks on you. My father wasn't. He was cruel. I was being strict. Until that day. I admit, I might have been too hard on you. But…" He sighed, "I really just wanted what I thought was best for you. You were my son, Ryan. I wanted you to be strong enough to face the world."

"I was your son…" Ryan had to swallow. "So, not even saving your wife's, my mother's life, and the life of your brother makes you want to accept me as your son again?" Duke didn't say anything. "Well, okay. I won't beg. You won't see me on my knees before you ever again. Good bye."

He walked over to his room. Luckily Alexx was gone, because he wouldn't have been able to stand anybody around him right now while trying to handle the pain inside him. What had he actually hoped for? He shook his head. Well, at least he had made his point clear, too. There would never be anything more between him and his father than… well… at least mutual respect. And if he was honest, it was more than he actually had expected. But less than he'd hoped for. He sighed and started undressing. A warm shower would do him good. Or maybe a cold shower…

---

When he got out of the shower, only dressed in boxers, he almost got a shock. Duke was sitting there, on the chair next to Ryan's bed. When he heard the door of the shower opened, he raised his head.

"I have something more to say, Ryan."

"Would you mind if I get dressed first? This isn't really comfortable."

"Sure."

Ryan just grabbed his clothes from the bed, walked back into the shower cabin, got dressed and then got out again. "What do you want?"

Duke didn't react immediately, but said, "I didn't know I was that brutal."

Ryan sighed. So his father had seen his back, even if he had tried to cover it up with the towel. "So?" He had rarely felt so vulnerable. "Anything more? Because if not, I'd like to be alone."

"Actually…" He took a breath, "Actually, yes. I… I know things between us are a real mess. But… I want to tell you something. And I mean it. I'm proud of what has become of you. I'm proud of what you and Ron have managed. When I saw your back just now, I suddenly knew I did wrong. I tried to be better than my father, but I was still… not a good father. I might have taught you to become hard. But that real strength you got… that mental strength… that really must have been Ron. During that week now, I noticed how much soul you have. I'm glad I never broke that." He got up from the chair and walked to the door. "I really wish we could work this out a bit." He opened the door. "Take care, Ryan."

"No, wait…" Ryan swallowed. "Maybe we can…"

"You think?"

Ryan sat down on the bed. "I don't know. There's been so much trouble between us… I… I really would love to. But I can't promise anything."

Duke's smile was bitter when he said, "I really messed you up, didn't I?"

"Pretty much, yeah. But, you know, Charles Dickens once said, and I quote, "Suffering has been stronger than all other teaching, and has taught me to understand what your heart used to be. I have been bent and broken, but - I hope - into a better shape." Maybe… Well, maybe you and Ron both made me what I am today. And… it's not that bad…"

Now Duke's smile change from bitter to amused, "Not bad at all, Ryan…" He sighed, "Our phone number hasn't changed. Just call when you feel ready. You have all the time in the world. And even if you never call… I want you to know I can understand that. And that I really am proud of you."

"Thanks, sir…"

"Good night." Duke left.

Ryan just watched the door, trying to handle what had just happened. Did his father just really offered him to… call? Had he really said he was sorry for everything? Had he really said he was proud? Ryan felt his entire body shaking. Okay. This was just too much for him. He switched the light off, lay down on the bed and closed his eyes. Finally, he could let his feelings take over him. The fear of the last days, the tension he had felt, the pain in his shoulder… and the little tiny hope in himself that was now revived… that he would at some point have a father, again.

------------------------------------------

So yeah. That's it. Likey? Not likey?