AN: I hope no ones getting bored with my story... It briefly occurred to me a write a lot of angst but that's because it's what I like reading... Especially angsty romances... But I've been trying to put some humour here and there... albeit I'm usually better at writing black humour (which is pretty much the reason my school believes I need intensive therapy... has nothing to do with the fact that I openly voice out that the principal is a douche, because he totally is... AND I WANT HIS TOUPEE TO FLY OFF!!!! Sorry... rambling) but I'm trying to make this a bit lighter than my usual, what my brother would call, 'suicide-induced' fiction. Although, I've definitely thrown in elements of that in here... I just like the whole 'no-let-me-be-the-one-to-die-instead-of-you-mi-amor' thing...
Oh and sorry, I didn't get time to look over the last chapter because I was literally flying out of the house when I was uploading... had to go food shopping with mum cause the meds ruin her depth perception which means she finds it hard to drive and I really wanted to get the chapter out.
Review replies (cause I don't do the whole PM thing...)
Xnerdark: Thank god! I thought you left me... Just at least hang on for two more chapters because I have something in here especially for you... (I think it'll be two chapters... I have a rough idea of what's going to happen and I know it'll happen in the next two...) SO HANG ON... And (grins sheepishly) I update pretty quickly...
Thistimeyourgone, Ch3lsBishop, AussiePanda, Noelle86 and distorted realities: Thanks for your reviews and here is your next chapter!
November123: Yeah, I basically have no life... LoL... Nah, I do but I catch a lot of public transport (cant be fucked paying for petrol) and I take my iPod touch with me... I downloaded a writing program so now I just write whenever I'm free, email to myself and then upload. Then I stay up until 3am and write... And when I'm really clear on what I want to happen, I can write really fast. My head is always spinning with writing ideas so I get 'em out quickly before I forget... Like... argh, read my end AN...
Lunar Kitty Kat: Never considered that... I kind of like your thoughts...
Alimard: Have I mentioned I hang for your reviews? LoL... I agree with you there... It kind of does my head in when I think about all those women who keep going back but like, I don't understand why they'd do it so I try not to judge... I judge the men though. I think they're arseholes... and I'm including in there those women who abuse their husbands... It's just stupid, hurting the person you're supposed to love the most... in saying that I do punch my best friend, but he punches me back and it never escalates over 'punch for punch' and a small bruise on both our shoulders... (a game which I play but detest because I have an unimaginably large fear of pain... I cry before I get needles. Then during and after... But he's like my best friend and I know he would never intentionally hurt me)
Spindle Faeries: Do you realise you're the only person who realised this? LoL... :)
Karma22: I was luckier than you... I live on the sixth storey and he threw up out the window... it rained later the next morning so all of it was washed away... But I feel for you. I really do... LoL... And dude! I just read your profile page! You are so my new best friend... Supernatural, Dark Angel, Charmed, NCIS, CSI, Moonlight, Blade, Covenant, Glee and Stargate Atlantis... That's like my dream TV run! And all your pairings are like, THE BEST! And you can make hectic banners whilst watching the Extended Lord of the Rings! Can I adopt you? Is that legal? I'm adopting you anyway, it's official. I don't think you have a choice in this situation... At least, I'm not giving you one... (even though you're older than me but who cares?! You're my brother's age actually... You sound like more fun than him... He sits there and questions me about my love life then proceeds to explain to me exactly why I shouldn't have one...) Is this weird? That I want to adopt you? Probably is, but it's me so I don't see it as being odd... shrugs...
ON WITH THE STORY!
They all drove back to Finn's house, Rachel driving with Puck because firstly, she was shaking too bad to drive and secondly, he didn't do as drastically crazy things when she was around. Puck reached into the back seat and yanked a towel out of one of his bags, passing it to Rachel and getting one for himself. "You didn't have to jump in you know." He said earning a death glare. "What? When I'm pissed, I usually do stupid things. Except it's usually punching people. I wasn't trying to kill myself, okay. Just... making a point?"
"A point of what?" Rachel asked seriously. "That the local council needs to fund a new cleaning program for the lake?"
"It's called having community involvement." he smirked. "I'm making a stand for the little guys."
"This is not funny Noah." Rachel dried some of her hair with the towel. "What were you thinking?" she said more seriously.
Puck shrugged, "I don't know. I was thinking I had to jump. I just wanted to jump. It was either that or destroy public property and I'm not in the mood to go to jail. Actually, then I could've probably gotten into a real fight..." his thoughts drifted off for a second but Rachel slapped his arm. He turned to look at her like she was a mosquito that just bit him. "What do you want Berry? Seriously, why are you even here?"
Rachel hadn't been expecting that and couldn't really answer it herself. As soon as Finn's voice came through the phone saying Puck was in trouble her first thought was, I need to help him. There was really no other thing she would consider doing at that time. She just knew that she had to help him. So she said it. "I wanted to help you."
"I don't need help."
"Obviously you do if you consider jumping into a lake fully clothed an acceptable way to deal with your emotional havoc."
"Oh, sure. I should've just stormed out and chucked a diva-sized hissy fit." Puck then paused, listening to his own words in his ears. "Shit, I've been spending too much time with Kurt."
"You can manage your timetable later, Noah." Rachel reached out her hand and took Puck's. She squeezed it tightly. "What's going on? Why are you so volatile lately?"
He was glad he remembered the word volatile from middle school science. He looked at Rachel's hand in his and then back out to the road. "Don't worry about it Berry." he said.
"I do worry though."
"Why?" he briefly looked away from the road to look at her. "Why do you care about me? I get the initial shock, I passed out on you but now... I told you. I dealt with Jacob. We're even. Do you like me being indebt to you?"
Rachel frowned. "Is that the only reason why you did that today? Because you were indebted to me?"
Puck realised it was the wrong thing to say, because that wasn't why he had done it. He just thought that what Jacob had done was too fucked for words and thought someone should teach the twit a lesson. Also, girls + crying = weirded out Puck and he had to bash Jacob to feel better again. Well, plus that he really didn't like Rachel crying. It pretty much pained him. (He was trying to be honest with himself, he really was).
"No." he said, then winced. Okay, maybe not that honest. "You were upset. I thought it would make you feel better, or at least make him feel worse. You tell anyone this and I'll probably deny it, but it's officially decided that the only people who can pick on the Gleeks is Mike, Matt, Finn and me. Anyone else, it's unacceptable. So like, Jacob doing that and then..." he paused. "Wait, you were slushied."
"Yes I was." she said, thinking back. "But that's off topic."
"Who slushied you?" Puck demanded as he pulled up in front of Finn's house. Mike and Finn were behind him.
"Your changing the topic." she said. "Tell me what's happening and I'll tell you who slushied me. I promise, and I'll even agree to letting you pummel him if that's your deepest desire."
"No way, you go first." he crossed his arms over his chest.
Rachel put her nose up in the air. "I'll even tell you how else he tortures me. Or has been torturing me, as of late."
"This dude tortures you?" Puck frowned. "Who the hell is it?"
"You go first." Rachel wrapped the towel closer around her and Puck was starting to feel uncomfortable in his wet clothing. He groaned and smacked his head back on the car knowing Rachel was a lot more patient than he was.
Finn got out of his car and looked at them curiously but Rachel waved him off. He shrugged and hoped that whatever was happening it would be fine if Rachel was there at least. Mike and him went inside to dry off and Rachel just waited for Puck to talk. "Okay, so uh... you heard my conversation with my mum this morning, right?"
Rachel nodded sadly. "I'm so sorry..."
"Don't be." he cut her off. "Seriously, I don't know how many times I need to tell you there's nothing to be sorry for."
She was about to say 'Sorry' again but thought better of it. "Okay. Continue."
"Yeah well, I went to pick Isla up after school and like, she was gone." He ran a hand through his mohawk as he thought of the absolute panic he'd experienced. "I talked to one of my old teachers and she said she was with my mum and I knew that meant dad too and like... I just freaked out. I went there to get her and then he called me son. I have no freaking idea why he thought he could but he called me son. I punched him, he punched back. I packed my bags, Isla packed hers, full of toys but anyway... We went to leave but mum blocked the way, things were said, he kind of insulted you and Kurt, I decked him again and we left."
"Wait... he said things about me and Kurt?" Rachel frowned. "How does your dad even know Kurt, let alone me?"
To this Puck turned a deep shade of red. "You know how when we were kids, we would kind of see each other at Temple but I'd never come over?" Rachel nodded, briefly remembering seeing Puck there as she grew up. "My dad didn't like your family." That's all Puck needed to say for Rachel to read between the lines. My dad didn't like your dad's. "I'm guessing that he recognised you when you pepper-sprayed him." the thought still made Puck smile.
"Oh." she crossed her arms over her chest. "And Kurt?"
Puck shrugged. "I don't know actually. I really don't." he leaned back in his seat, staring up at the ceiling. "Maybe the old man's been stalking me."
"Enough with stalkers." Rachel shivered, thinking about Jacob more than the cold taking over. "So why'd you jump into the lake?"
"I don't know that either. I just felt like it. I felt like doing something stupid and reckless and... well I did it last time."
"Last time?"
"Yeah... when my dad first left. I climbed that tree in the middle of the night after I got Finn to sneak out with me." Puck frowned, remembering that night. "I fell in that time. I'd meant to jump, but then I freaked out 'cause I couldn't swim. I was hanging and Finn tried to help me but he couldn't pull me back up. I couldn't pull myself up so I had to drop. And then when I was under I didn't want to come back up. Felt kind of good down there. It was dark and cold, but I knew why. The lake had a reason for being like that. And... and so did I." He couldn't believe he just said all of that. He hadn't even told the guidance councillor that when he went in for his 'anger management' session (school made him). He would've told the councillor to stick it actually, but he kind of liked Mrs Pillsbury and thought she was a laugh when she was cleaning her grapes with a handkerchief.
"But... but you tried to get out right?" Rachel frowned. "I mean, you're alive." Then she thought her question was stupid but Puck got at what she was trying to ask.
"Yeah, duh." He lied, turning his badass back on. "I ain't no emo shit, Berry."
Rachel frowned and squeezed his hand tighter. "Finn saved you didn't he. That's why he got really scared when he saw you jump in and that's why you tolerate his protective and somewhat stupid nature all the time, isn't it?"
Puck frowned, "He's not stupid... Just slow. If you stopped using such big words around him, he'd probably get a lot more. And that whole right, left thing confuses a lot of people."
Rachel chuckled. "And it's why you always come to his defence. You can take shit out on each other but as soon as someone else starts to, world war three breaks out."
"Whoa, Berry swore." Puck laughed.
She narrowed her eyes, a smile playing on her lips. "It's what Mike said yesterday while you were sleeping." Puck remembered, but decided not to mention it. "It was how he described you two."
"Man this is starting to sound like some chick-flick moment."
"You didn't answer my question." she said. "Isn't that the reason? Because Finn saved you?" Puck just became very silent, his wet and pruning fingers gripping the steering wheel. "I'll take that as a yes."
"Don't say anything." Puck said quickly, his eyes flashing angrily. "To anybody. Ever. In a million..." Rachel put her hand in front of Puck's mouth and smiled, gently rubbing his cheek with her thumb.
"Don't worry." she said, her head tilting to the side. "I won't ruin your 'badass' reputation. I promise. I won't say a thing. Not even to Finn."
Puck just nodded and when she removed her hand he felt really cold. Not that he liked being gagged or anything, but he liked her hand on his face. BUT HE DID NOT LIKE RACHEL BERRY LIKE THAT!
It was all Puck could do but to keep repeating that and hope that it will eventually be true.
~*~
Rachel and Mike had gone back home after Carol had insisted they stay for dinner (which they did after Finn had given them a spare change of clothes while they waited for hers and Mike's in the dryer). Rachel had dropped Mike off and after a lot of fussing from Mrs Hudson, Puck was finally allowed to go to bed. His face reeked of the bruising cream Mrs Hudson had forced onto him.
Puck just took it and rubbed it all over his face, hoping it meant that he wouldn't look like a total idiot the next day. His face was kind of throbbing painfully but it was alright compared to what it could've been. Puck walked out of the bathroom and down the hallway to the study with the fold out bed which Isla was currently occupying. He leaned on the doorway and watched her sit there, devising a conversation between two of her teddy bears. Puck had bought one of them for her (stolen) and thought it was kind of cool how she always had it on her. (It took him two hours to get the security tag off... she had better cling to it like a fly on honey).
He laughed as the teddy bears did something that looked like dancing and Isla looked up at him. "Hi." She said with a big smile on her face. "Your face is purple."
Puck nodded, "I like it. Kind of different."
She put on her most serious face where she pursed her lips and her eyebrows furrowed. Puck had to try not to laugh because he knew was about to cop a lecture. "No Noah, your hair is different. Having a purple face is just plain weird."
Puck walked over to the bed and laid down on it, stretching out next to his sister. "Yeah but I'm a badass. I can pull it off."
"It's not a bandaid Noah. It's your face." she crawled across him so she was laying on his stomach, her face resting on his stomach and looking up into his eyes. Puck smiled and started running his hand through her long hair that reached her waist.
"When did you get to be so smart?" he asked. "I thought babies were supposed to be stupid."
"I'm not a baby." she said the word like it was something disgusting. "I'm seven."
"Six." he corrected her.
"Seven in after Christmas."
"That's in like, two months."
"Then you'll be seventeen."
"In three months." He frowned. "Dude, it's far away."
"I'm not a dude." she frowned at him.
"What, your not a baby, your not a dude... what are you then?"
She thought about it for a second then grinned. "I'm a princess."
"Oh, you are now?" Puck was trying not to laugh at the complete sincerity on her face.
"Yeah." she said then she rested one hand underneath her head. "What are you?"
"Me? I'm a badass." He smirked proudly.
Isla frowned, "That sounds painful."
"Oh, it is." Puck nodded seriously but then he grinned. "For the other guy." Isla laughed with him and he ruffled her hair. "I still think you're a snot-faced little dweeb."
"That's okay. Cause I still think you're an ugly bum." She looked up and pursed her lips to the side of her face, trying to look suspiciously innocent.
"You're so gonna cop it now." Puck growled and then he moved his hands down to her stomach and started tickling her. Isla squealed as Puck continued to tickle her. "Say uncle." He threatened as she tried to wriggle away from him.
"No!" she squealed.
"Well then I'm not gonna stop." He kept tickling her until Isla gave up.
"Okay, okay... Uncle!" she giggle even after he stopped and twitched her arms. "I hate when you do that." She said but she was still laughing.
"Doesn't look like you hate it." he rolled out of bed and stood up straight. "It's time for you to go to bed anyway."
"But you didn't say anything about my new dress." Isla said sadly as she just looked up at him.
"New dress?" Now Puck was confused. When did she get a dress?
"Yeah, look. Mrs Hudson hung it up for me." Isla jumped up and walked over to the door, closing it to show a white dress with black polka dots on it. There were a pair of glasses hanging off the hanger as well as a red scarf. "I even got shoes." She rushed over to the other corner of the room and pulled out red patent slip-ons. He briefly registered it was what he had seen his sister in when he had come home. Except the red scarf was wrapped around her head like a bandana. "Quinn gave them to me. She's really nice. She said she used to wear them."
Puck had realised that and smiled. "They're really nice Isles. You looked very pretty wearing them. I'm sorry I forgot to say something. I'm just so used to looking so pretty all the time, I didn't think about it." That got her smiling again and she launched herself into her brothers arms. He hugged her before putting her into the bed. "Okay, now sleep." he commanded. "Teeth?"
"Check."
"Pyjama's?"
"Check."
"Bed?"
Isla smacked the twice with both hands. "Comfy."
"Covers?"
"Warm."
"Teddy?"
She reached over to grab her teddy beat but he had disappeared. "Not here! Abort, abort!"
She was about to get frantic but Puck pulled the bear from behind his back and put it in front of her face. "Cancel abort, captain." He passed her the bear. "Teddy's with you." He wrapped the covers back around her and leaned down, kissing her on her forehead. "Night Isles."
"Goodnight." she said then Puck offered her his cheek and she kissed it. "Love you Noah."
"Yeah, yeah. I love you too." he walked over to the door and half closed it behind him, leaving it open enough for the hall light to seep through. He stuck his head against the wall and groaned, sliding down until he was sitting down.
He hung his head low, trying to get rid of the pulsing migraine that was slowly taking over him. Puck heard slipped feet walking down the hallway and didn't even look up because he knew it was Mrs Hudson. "Finn would like me to violently remind you that you're sleeping in the basement tonight." she said, pausing in front of him. "He also would like for you to know he would be kicking you out if it wasn't for the fact he loves your sister and doesn't want to see her on the streets. Needless to say, he's going to need help to set up the trundle bed in his room, because you know how he gets confused with his rights and lefts and the instructions do say, 'pull right side first'." Puck chuckled at this, still not looking up. Mrs Hudson leaned down and kissed the side of his mohawk before rubbing the back of his head for good measure. "I'll talk to your mother in the morning Noah. And until she sees the light, just remember she's not the only family you have."
His mind flashed to Quinn, pregnant with his child and he clenched the pant legs on either side of his knees. Yeah, but for how much longer?
Mrs Hudson then decided to shuffle down the hall away from him, "Oh and please stop scaring Finn." she said, a bit more pleading. "He's going to get greys."
"Mum!" Finn yelled down the hallway, obviously hearing her.
Puck laughed again, tilting his head back and looking at Mrs Hudson who was heading down the stairs. Finn stuck his head out the door and glared at Puck. "Dude, she's so right. You need to chill or else your gonna look like a granddad."
"Get in here and help me with this thing." Puck pushed himself up off the wall, grumbling. "Okay, okay... But dude, seriously. Right, left... The hand that makes the 'L' shape is the left."
AN: Is it bad that I know how to take off those security tags?? I don't know... I'm gonna ponder this tomorrow...
Oh and cause I'm dyslexic, well more specifically dyspraxic (form of dyslexia... and now my computers being mean because it won't let me spell dyspraxic, saying it's 'incorrect' but I looked it up on Google goddammit!), I get really confused with my right and left, so I make an 'L' shape with both my hands and figure it out :).
Grgh... I had this awesome idea for a few chapters down... It was like the most EPIC Puckleberry moment EVER and I was so determined on writing it I even did that thing I do (it sounds crazy) where I speak what the characters are gonna say... aloud... in my room... while I'm alone... Or I mutter it while I'm walking along the street... Whatever. (Have to stop saying that!) And like, I even found the song for it and then my mum came and started talking to me about ASPARAGUS and whether or not she should put it into the pasta salad for tomorrow... we went through the pro's and con's and we eventually decided no because Justin hates asparagus and we try not to anger anyone on Christmas cause we're one of those 'foodie' families... Anywhoo, so my mum left and I looked at my iPod, thinking the song was still there but... IT WASN'T! And my iPod is on Shuffle... STILL! Then I totally forgot what I was going to write (because it had to do with the song) and I keep drawing up blank!
So there is a small chance I'm going to stay up all night looking through my 3302 songs for this ONE song. So much for looking good for Christmas lunch.
MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE! This is your present! (One of them)... If you guys want to return the love, just Review...
Have a safe and happy holiday!
Love from,
Bibz (and TheFemaleWinchester who likes to be included... and my brother, Justin who decided that since I mention him often enough, he's apart of fanfiction through association... and my mum who just shouted from down the hall to say 'Merry Christmas' too, but I think that's cause she thinks I'm emailing my cousins in Germany... Oh hell, from the whole family, Dad, Aunts, Uncles, cousins and grandparents included! Plus the dog!)