AN: Pub lunch between classes… Epic.
Review Replies:
Karma22: I am studying! I've exams this week! (love!)
I have a legend! And it will be Legend… wait for it... Dary!
Song 1:
Puck
Quinn, Santana, Matt, Mike, Brittany
Song 2:
Rachel
Puck
The next time they all gathered for Glee club was more than awkward. No one really looked at Puck, who ignored them too, Finn, who ignored everyone, or Quinn, who shifted between staring at the floor and staring at the ceiling, but tried to chat with Rachel who just stayed silent. Even though everything was awkward though, none of them gave up on Glee club.
It was the first day Finn had been back at school and he only went because he was forced. Apart from his appearances in class and Glee, no on had seen him in the hallways, avoiding everyone who was relentlessly teasing him for thinking the hot tub myth was real.
"Okay, so now that we're heading onto Regionals," Mr Schue started to say as he walked around in front of them. "We need bigger and better ideas because now we have to be perfect. And we all know Vocal Adrenaline already have theirs picked out and are just perfecting their crazily good choreography. Now, here are the requirements. One duet, one ballad, one group performance, one musical and the other two are completely up to us. Now I was thinking we do a mash-up because you guys love them so much and another group performance. Is that cool with all of you?"
Everyone started nodding, chatting about ideas amongst themselves when Artie drove his wheelchair into the back of Puck's chair. "Hey!" Puck said defensively. "Dude..."
"Puck has something he wants to show all of you." Artie said, glaring at Puck.
Puck frowned, "Dude, no I don't."
Tina stood up nodding. "It's really good Mr Schue. We heard him playing here this morning. Seriously. Me and Artie will play with you Puck."
It was only then did Puck realise what song they were talking about. "No way am I playing that."
Artie shoved his wheelchair into Puck's chair again, this time making him almost fall off. "Dude!"
"Get you guitar and sing it once and I won't ever roll over your toes again."
"You do that on purpose?"
Artie didn't answer but instead looked at Mr Schue. "It's a ballad and Puck will be more than happy to sing it." he rammed his wheelchair into his legs again. "Right?"
Tina had already jumped behind the bongo set and was waiting patiently. Artie had gone and pulled out his guitar and Puck was glaring at everyone. "Fine. Mr Schue, I'd like to sing."
Rachel became suddenly preoccupied with the ribbons on her cardigan while Finn just pointedly looked out the window. Quinn was staring at him with the 'what the hell are you doing' eyes but Puck just rolled his own as he adjusted his guitar on his lap. "This is Artie and Tina's fault by the way. Because they caught me in here playing this song and thought it would be excellent if I played it for you guys. Now they're tricking me into singing it. Freaking weirdos..."
"Language Puck." Mr Schue warned. "Just get on with it."
Puck nodded and looked at Artie, tapping on floor. "Three, two, one..." They both started playing together. Puck played the basic strumming while Artie played the more complicated adlib. As Tina started playing the bongos in the background with light rain like beats, Puck started to sing.
I am a victim of my time
A product of my age
There was no choosing my direction
I was a holy man but now
With all my trials behind me
I am weak in my conviction
And so I walk to try to get away
Knowing that someday I will finally have to face
The fear that will come from knowing that
The one thing I had left was you
And now you're gone
The music and the rhythm picked up and Puck in took a breath and looked straight at Rachel.
You were a victim of my crimes
A product of my rage
You were a beautiful distraction
I kept you locked away outside
Let misery provide
And now I am ashamed
And so I walk to try to find a space
Where I can be alone to live with my mistakes
And the fear that will come
From knowing that the one thing
I had left was you
And now you're gone, hey, hey, hey.
Quinn, Santana, Matt, Mike and Brittany knew what song Puck was singing and joined in the chorus.
Is there nothing at all
That I can do to turn your heart
Is there nothing to lean on
That could help erase the scars
Te quiero, mi cielo
And I could use a little strength before I fall
Is there nothing at all
Puck gave a small smile of thanks before continuing.
I am victim of my time
A product of the age
You alone are my obsession
You were the one I left behind
You've been heavy on my mind
It's been a lonely road I've travelled
Rachel was finally looking into his eyes and he realised with some happiness that she nudged Finn. He turned his head briefly.
And so I walk to try to get away
Knowing that someday I will finally have to face
The fear that will come from knowing that
The one thing I had left was you
And now you're gone, oh!
Everyone excluding Finn and Rachel joined in.
Is there nothing at all
That I can do to turn your heart
Is there nothing to lean on
That can help erase the scars
Te quiero, mi cielo
And I could use a little strength before I fall
Is there nothing at all
Artie shredded the guitar as Mike leaned over to Santana and pulled her to her feet. The two started dancing around in a circle, Mike leading brilliantly. Everyone started singing again.
Badum, badum, badum, badum, badaaaaaaaaah.
Ohhhh-oh...
Is there nothing at all
That I can do to turn your heart
Is there nothing to lean on
That could help erase the scars
Te quiero, mi cielo
And I could use a little strength before I fall
Is there nothing at all
Puck took another last strum before Artie finished on one of those crazy high notes. Everyone clapped, whistling and laughing but Puck didn't care. He was just staring at Rachel who stared at him with questioning eyes. But she didn't say anything. Rachel pushed herself off the chair and ran out of the room, making everyone fall silent and stare at her. Finn also got up and went to followed her and Puck glared at Artie and Tina.
Mr Schue wasn't sure what to do, so clapped his hands together, "So that's an option."
Puck leaned against the wall out the back of the auditorium, hiding from the rest of the school, right there in the middle of the stage. Now that babygate was out, he couldn't really face anyone, especially seeing as he was sleeping on his teachers couch while his little sister and baby mama shared a bed in his study. He chuckled to himself, thinking about how stupid his life sounded.
Now he was thinking about Glee club too and that stupid stunt Artie and Tina had made him pull. It had only been four days since him and Rachel broke up. Kind of broke up. Did all of that count as a break up?
He was pretty sure it did.
His head darted up as he heard the auditorium doors open. Deep in his gut, he knew who it was. And he half wanted her to find him there. That was probably why he was sitting in between the curtains of the auditorium. For her.
Rachel walked down the steps and saw Puck sitting there, looking out straight ahead. She was about to turn and leave when she decided that she couldn't just run away from him. With whatever courage she could muster, she swallowed and walked over to the piano, laying out sheets on the stand.
And after she played the first few chords to get used to the song, she started singing.
You breathed infinity into my world
and time was lost up in a cloud and in a whirl.
We dug a hole in the cool grey earth and lay there for the night.
Then you said, "wait for me we'll fly the wind,
we'll grow old and you'll be stronger without him" but oh,
now my world is at your feet. I was lost and I was found,
but I was alive and now I've drowned.
So now I will be waiting for the world to hear my song
so they can tell me I was wrong...
Puck looked up and he thought he recognised the song so he got lost in her voice, listening to her heart felt words. He stood up and walked over to the piano, placing his hands on the black top.
But they weren't there beneath your stare,
and they weren't stripped 'till they were bare of
any bindings from the world outside that room.
And they weren't taken by the hand
and led through fields of naked land
where any pre-conceived ideas were blown away...
so I couldn't say "no".
The music paused for a moment before starting again. Rachel was about to sing, but Puck started instead.
You sighed and I was lost in you, weeks could've past for all I knew.
You were the blanket of the over-world and so I couldn't say,
I wouldn't say "no".
Rachel licked her lips and went on.
But they all said, "you're too young to even know,
just don't let it grow and you'll be stronger without him"
but oh, now, my world is at your feet. I was lost and I was found,
but I was alive and now I've drowned.
So now I will be waiting for the world to hear my song
so they can tell me I was wrong...
But they weren't there beneath your stare,
and they weren't stripped 'till they were bare
of any bindings from the world outside that room.
And they weren't taken by the hand and led through fields
of naked land where any pre-conceived ideas were blown away...
Were blow away.
But they weren't there beneath your stare,
and they weren't stripped 'till they were bare
Were blown away.
of any bindings from the world outside that room.
Were blown away.
And they weren't taken by the hand and led through fields of naked land
Were blown away.
Where any pre-conceived ideas were blown away...
so I couldn't say "no"
They held the last note for a while, neither quite looking at the other. "You know Missy Higgins." Rachel murmured, her fingers trailing the piano.
"I think it's weirder that you do." he said back, just as quietly.
Rachel shrugged, not really looking at him. "I listen to a lot of different sorts of music to broaden my repertoire." There was a hesitant pause before she went on, "And I like how she can paint a picture with her words. No matter how abstract the scenery she describes is, you can just see it and feel what it's like to be there. Sad or happy or hopeful. You can feel her emotions."
"Or feel someone else's." he said quietly enough for her to hear but if someone had been standing next to him, they wouldn't have.
She nodded, "Yes, well there is that."
"Do you hate me?" he asked gently.
Rachel just shrugged. "I don't know how I feel towards you. I know what I feel but I don't know how those feelings have shifted my emotions towards you specifically."
"How do you feel?" he asked, still staring at the piano keys.
Rachel was too, not completely sure of what to say. "Betrayed, heart broken, confused... Angry and... well mainly confused. I'm always confused nowadays it seems."
"I'm sorry I've made you feel that." he said honestly. "I'm sorry for pretty much everything. For not telling you, for dragging you along, for lying out right... I'm sorry about all of it."
Rachel looked up at him, her big brown eyes filled with sadness. "I know you are. But I honestly don't think that's enough this time."
"But it happened before you." he added.
Rachel shook her head, "It doesn't matter. I would have understood if you just told me. I would have been angry and jealous for a while, but it happened before me. If you had told me things would have been different but you didn't. I asked you outright if anything happened between you and you lied. And I don't know how to forgive that." Rachel collected her things and got up off the piano.
Puck saw her turning her back to him and couldn't stand it. He grabbed her arm and turned her around, pulling her close to him. Before Rachel could make a sound, he was kissing her.
He tried to make her understand through his song.
Tried to make her understand through her song.
Now he needed to make her understand his way. By showing her just how he felt.
But Rachel wouldn't have it. She shoved Puck back and it was more the action than the force that affected him. In true Rachel fashion, she pulled her hand back and slapped Puck across the face. He pulled back and closed his eyes as he heard her feet marching off the stage up out of the auditorium. As he opened his eyes, the entire place was quiet and he was once again alone.
When Rachel got home, she ignored her fathers and jogged upstairs to her bedroom, slamming the door behind her. They didn't know exactly what was going on. She'd never really informed them on how serious she had been with Puck. They knew vaguely that the two of them had been spending a lot of time together but she couldn't actually bring herself to tell them she had a boyfriend.
One father was bad.
Two fathers…
She sat at her computer and decided the first thing she needed to do was make a therapeutic video for her myspace. She wanted to sing Missy Higgins originally which was why she went to the auditorium to practice but the song was now laced with double meanings and she was no longer feeling empty. She was furious.
How dare he think he can just… ugh!
She started furiously clicking at her computer, searching her library for the perfect song but she just couldn't find one that explained how she was feeling.
Because every time Rachel closed her eyes…
She'd leant into the kiss. She'd wanted it. She wanted it more than anything. When he first started kissing her a small part of herself had said, finally. But then there was another part of her entirely that didn't want that. It didn't want to be broken or lied to again.
Furious for letting him make her that girl again.
She was concentrating on her computer so furiously that she didn't realise that there was a rustling noise coming from her window. Nor did she really here someone jiggling at the lock on her window, until they gave up and just started knocking.
She jumped up in surprise and turned around to see Finn hobbled over, sitting on the branch outside her window. Rachel's eyes popped open and she quickly scuttled across her room and opened the window, letting Finn gracelessly fall through onto the floor. "Finn, what are you doing?" she demanded but she also whispered her words because she didn't want her fathers to hear.
"I couldn't take it at home. Mom keeps looking at me like I'm about to break." he shook his head. "Then school is worse. You know Markus left hot tub pool crystals in my locker. Like, filled the thing up. It just poured out all into the hallway and I had no idea what they were until he explained it to me and then I felt even worse." Finn sat on the edge of Rachel's bed and she hesitantly sat beside him. "Everyone knows how big of a loser I am and everyone's making it out like I'm the biggest idiot out there."
Rachel couldn't blame everyone from thinking that… Hot tub pregnancy? But Rachel didn't want to be cruel. He didn't deserve it. So instead, she wrapped her arm around his shoulder and tried comforting him. "It's going to be okay, Finn. Everyone will forget about it. In a couple of weeks there will be a new gossip reel in the school and this will be ancient history."
"But to me, it won't." Finn kept saying. "In a couple of weeks, the baby will still be Puck's and him and Quinn will still be playing happy couple in Mr Schue's living room."
"Mr… What?"
"Yeah. Mr Schue's letting them stay on his couch. Kurt told me." Finn looked at the back of his hands and frowned. "How do you cope with it, Rachel?"
Rachel shrugged her shoulders, "I don't. I sing."
"Is that working for you?"
She looked hopelessly at her computer with her webcam already set up. It wasn't working. It wouldn't work. As much as she wished it could, singing her heart out wouldn't help this time.
She just wanted Puck back but her pride wouldn't let her. Her heart wouldn't let her. "No, not very well."
There was silence as the two sat in her room, staring intently at her cream carpet as if it held all the answers and a crystal ball into the future. Rachel thought they were both staring at the carpet for a long while, but it turned out that Finn had turned his head and was staring at her. After a while, she felt his breath warm against her cheek and when she turned her head, he leant forward and for the second time in the day, Rachel found herself kissing someone without warning.
This time though, Rachel didn't want it. Had it been four months previous, she would have jumped on the opportunity to make out with Finn. But now she had Noah. Or she wanted Noah.
Quite passively and lost in her own thoughts, Rachel let Finn push her back until he was lying on top of her on the bed. It was only when Finn was removing his shirt did she come out of her thoughts of Puck to come to the realisation of what Finn was trying to do.
She put her hands against his shoulders and shoved him off of her. Finn rolled off her and fell to the ground with a loud thunk. She pulled her hands over her mouth as her fathers voice echoed from downstairs. "Rachel?" her father Leroy called out. "Are you okay?"
"Fine." she called back. "Just… just dropped my books to the floor."
"What books are you reading?" Leroy asked but he didn't bother waiting for an answer and didn't bother Rachel again.
Finn got up and frowned at her. "What was that?"
"I don't know why you came here, Finn but… But I can't be anything more than your friend."
"Why not?" he asked. "We used to have such great… Great chemistry. We kissed… That time in the Auditorium."
"That was a different time." she insisted. "When I felt different things for you."
"You were just kissing me back!"
"I…" Rachel had no idea how to explain that or the fact that her lips had betrayed her once again. "I wasn't thinking straight."
"No you just weren't thinking about me." he snapped. "Just like Quinn and Puck. Just like everyone. No one cares how I feel about it." And with that, Finn jumped out of the window and back onto the tree, causing Rachel to let out a frightened squeal. She ran over to the ledge and watched as Finn climbed down the tree then angrily got into his car and drove off.
"Oh no." she murmured then ran back towards her desk and withdrew her mobile. First she called Matt but his number went straight into message bank. She knew that Mike was teaching dance classes and Kurt would be no help. With no where else to turn, Rachel dialled Puck.
"Homework." Mr Schue repeated to them.
Puck looked up at Schue and then back at Quinn who was rolling her eyes. Puck's deal with Mr Schue was that he could live there with Quinn and his sister for as long as he wanted with the rules that Puck showed up to all of his classes, (thus going to Maths class), and that Quinn, Puck and Isla would finish their homework every night before anything else.
That was how every afternoon the three of them ended up sitting around the booth in Schue's kitchen with their books spread out around them. On the plus side, Mr Schue did provide them with constant snacks and Isla didn't leave the table even once she'd finished her homework. Although Puck had an idea that it had to do with the constant cookie stream Mr Schue provided them.
He had his earphones plugged in so at first, when his mobile rung, he didn't hear it. It was Quinn waving it in front of his face that got him to turn off Death Cab and hear that Sweet Caroline was playing on his mobile. His heart literally stopped when he saw *RB* flashing on the screen with her matching ring tone.
Usually, Mr Schue didn't let them answer calls during their study time but even he knew who the ringtone belonged to.
When Puck looked up to him, pretty much pleading Schue waved his hand and nodded. "Go ahead."
He pressed the green button on his phone and brought it up to his ear, extremely aware of how Isla and Quinn were probing him with their eyes. "Hello?" he said nervously.
"Noah? I need help."
He raised an eyebrow. "With what?"
"Finn."
Puck's gut twisted and he said darkly, "Look if you want my approval to date him, you don't need it…" Quinn's jaw dropped and she almost tackled Puck for the phone and would have hadn't he stuck his foot out and blocked her.
"Don't be so stupid." she said into the phone and Puck could imagine her putting her hand on her hip and rolling her eyes. "This has absolutely nothing to do with that. Well.. Not really. Look…" Then Rachel proceeded to explain what had happened to her. How Finn had climbed through her window and proceeded to make out with her and how she pushed him off when things seemed to be going further. He couldn't lie. He was gripping the buttercup yellow table pretty freaking tight when he heard, but he couldn't say anything without seeming like a jackass.
The fact he took his best friends girl was sitting beside him hidden under a big green jumper and attempting to attack him for the phone. "So what do you want me to do?"
"I think he might do something stupid, Noah. Matt isn't picking up the phone, Mike isn't around… You're the only one I have to call. You or Mr Schue but I assume you're at his house right now, correct?"
Puck nodded his head and reached over the table to grab his wallet and keys. "Alright, I'll go find him."
"Take Mr Schue. Or at least a witness."
"Don't worry babe. If he kills me, you're the last person I want to speak to." he didn't want to give her a chance to respond andruin things for her, so he hung his phone up and nodded to Mr Schue. "I know your rules, but Finn just tried getting his revenge on Quinn and me with Rach and when she rejected him he went haywire. I need to talk to him."
"Rachel rejected him?" Quinn said surprised.
"Of course." Isla rolled her eyes at Quinn's stupidity and dramatically crossed her arms. "She loves Noah."
Quinn looked a little taken aback by being told by a six year old so fell silent. "I'll come with you to find him." Mr Schue said firmly. "Will you two be okay here by yourself?"
Quinn and Isla both nodded their heads and Puck slid Isla out of the booth then himself, grabbing his car keys. "I know where he'll be."
Everyone had their place. When they were angry or upset they would instinctually go there. Puck had the lake and Finn had the cemetery.
Puck had always thought it was sad. Finn's dad wasn't actually there. Just a plaque with his name on it. But it meant the world to Finn so Puck knew he would be there. Mr Schue and Puck got out of Puck's truck, which he parked behind Finn's car. The sun was setting and Puck could just make out the shadow of Finn sitting in the grass, in front of flat plaque on the ground that was just a memorial for the fallen soldiers.
Puck stopped Mr Schue about half way there then made the rest of the journey himself.
Finn didn't even see him approach. He just heard someone sit beside him and when he looked up it was Puck.
He looked up and the two boys just stared at each other quietly. Then, without any warning, Finn shouted and lunged across the small space between them and went to finish what he'd been pulled away from days before in the rehearsal room.
Just as Puck had his skull cracked on the closest headstone, Mr Schue came out of no where and swept Finn up off the ground, shoving Finn to the ground. "That's enough Finn. Enough."
"No!" Finn shouted, pulling away. "He took everything away from me. My girlfriend. My daughter. My pride…"
"He gave it back." Schue whispered. "Your life. You're not going to be the teenaged father, he is. You can have your whole future ahead of you again. He can't. By finding out what really happened, you got your life back Finn."
"But I just accepted my new life. I just accepted everything and now I have to start again." Fin curled up into a ball and pulled his arms over his head. "It's not fair."
Puck pulled himself up onto his elbows and watched Finn totally break down in the middle of the cemetery.
Mr Schue was right. His entire life was now ruined/ Even though he'd always known it was his baby he'd had no duty to take care of her until now. Even if they gave her up for adoption, there was going to be one day in the far off future where she returned and when that day came he was going to carry that burden.
Puck's life was effectively over.
How about that, hey? Two or three chapters left, depending how intensely I write and they'll all be up within a fortnight… Have midsemester exams then break after this week.
Review Replies:
Kelston: Nope, I found my college, but thank you anyway.
Tate4eer: I like the Schuster :)
Lizzybennettdarcy: You are welcome.
Kkcnelson: You are very welcome and yes. Yes you should thank my boring teacher… I don't, but someone most definitely should one of these days.X
XritaskeeterhatersX: Thanks!
SuzQQ: I like Quinn, despite everything. I think she's just as lost and crazy as the rest of them but I must say, I'm sick of Rachel getting all the hate on the show when the things she does are no less devious as the things everyone else does. When Quinn does something bitchy it's just like, "Well she's the popular pregnant chick" but if Rachel does something it's the end of the world.
Tomfeltonlover1991: Don't worry. Your problems will be half sold soon.
JustAmazing: Shout out when you catch up!
Review peeps!