Chapter 9

Like the Back of My Hand

Later that morning:

Michelle and Tony pulled up to her apartment in Tony's SUV.

"Here we are" Tony announced as he hopped out and hurried over to Michelle's side. She let out a shaky breath and let Tony help her out of the car. Her entire body was still sore and her head was pounding.

Tony slung his arm around her body to support Michelle as she limped to the front door. She pulled the keys out of her pocket, unlocked the door, and right before she walked inside Michelle let out another nervous breath.

Tony looked at her curiously and helped her in. Immediately Michelle turned toward the bedroom to gather her belongings and mumbled under her breath, "home sweet home."

Tony looked around and noticed the cold, chilly feel of her apartment. It was a little bigger than his, and nicely decorated, but held a depressing aura. Other than the obviously furnished surroundings, there was no personalized items: no pictures, books, pillows. It looked like she had just moved in. The walls were bare, and the room was cold.

Tony squinted in confusion and followed Michelle into her bedroom. He stopped outside the door, unsure whether to enter or not. Then he heard a soft crash and someone whisper, "shoot!"

He immediately pushed the door open and walked inside. "Michelle? You okay?"

"In here" she called from a closet. Tony opened the door and saw her on the floor, digging through piles of clothes. "I was trying to pull my suitcase out and the entire rack just fell on me."

Tony smiled to himself. "Here, let me help." He crouched down and offered her his hand. She looked up at him and took it. Tony pulled her up and placed his other hand behind her back to steady her. "You should really take it easy. You seem to forget that you're in a cast and were in a coma a few days ago."

Michelle rolled her eyes. "I'm fine, really. It's just so annoying that I can't do anything with this stupid thing on my arm."

"Don't you realize you almost died, Michelle?" Michelle looked up at him, soaking in his words. "This is serious." You need to take some time for yourself to recover. You're blowing this whole thing off like its nothing. I don't want you to get upset, and I'm glad you're not totally depressed, but what you're doing is…unhealthy."

Michelle sighed. "You're right, I guess. I'm just trying to pretend like none of this happened, because then it will go away."

Tony looked at her and pulled her in for a hug. "It's going to be okay, I promise. You'll get better, we'll get this whole situation sorted out, and everything will be fine."

Tony could feel Michelle nod on his shoulder. She sniffed and he pulled her back. "Now, let's hang that rack back up and finish packing, okay?"

After Tony finished cleaning up her closet, Michelle was anxious to get out of the apartment. "Let me get into some normal clothes quickly. Would you mind packing up this pile here, and then we can go?" After she finished her sentence, Michelle hustled toward the bathroom and shut the door. Tony smiled to himself, rolled his eyes, and stood outside the bathroom door. He waited for a few seconds before he heard her mumble, "dammit. Shoot. Tony?" she called. She flung the door open and almost jumped out of her skin when he saw her standing right in front of her. "Jeez, you scared the crap out of me!" she panted, with her hand over her heart.

Tony couldn't help but laugh. "Sorry, but I knew you still needed help whether you admitted it or not. So why are you in such a rush?" he asked as he helped her with her shirt.

Michelle looked down at the floor and her face turned bright red. Tony wasn't sure whether that was from him taking off her shirt or from what she was going to stay.

"Nothing, I just hate my apartment."

"Why's that?" he pressed. Michelle had made a similar comment earlier, and Tony was dying to know. He wanted to know everything about her.

"Just stupid reasons. My old boyfriend used to live here with me, and…there's just a lot of bad memories. I never really got settled in."

Tony frowned and finally finished pulling the shirt over her head. "I'm sorry. But hey, look at the bright side: we've got this whole shirt-removal thing down to a science" he said proudly.

Michelle couldn't help but stifle a laugh. "Thanks" she whispered. Tony smiled back. "No problem. Now, um…you go get dressed" he said, referring to her lack of clothes.

Michelle's blush deepened. Tony walked out laughing and Michelle shut the door. Tony packed all of her clothes, and noticed he kept smiling to himself. He was really looking forward to spending the next week with her.

Once he was done, Tony began wandering around the apartment. It would have been a really nice place if it had been spruced up a little. Tony noticed a few photos laying around, some turned face down. They were mostly from Michelle's childhood; her and her brother, mother, father…all when she was little. There weren't any recent pictures, or any of her as a teenager. Tony thought this was odd.

"Okay, I'm ready!" he heard her call. Tony strolled back into the bedroom to see Michelle standing in blue jeans and a nice, flowery top, completed with casual sandals. Her hair, for the first time, wasn't tied back, and fell naturally on her shoulders. She wasn't even wearing makeup. She looked completely…natural. "Do you think this is appropriate to wear to CTU even if I'm not working?" she asked, throwing Tony out of his stare.

"yes, it's perfect. Rub it into Ryan's face that he has to let employees off when they have near-death injuries."

Michelle rolled her eyes and playfully hit him in the arm. "Come on, let's just go and get this debriefing over with."

Tony helped Michelle over to the car. When they reached the passenger door, Michelle tried to lift her leg to step inside but Tony saw her face flinch as she did so. She clutched her abdomen and fell to the floor.

"What's the matter?" he asked urgently, picking her up. "Are you okay?"

"It's nothing" she replied, her eyes squeezed shut. "It's just my stomach…every move I make hurts really bad." She tried to take in a deep breath to calm herself but ended up keeling over again.

Immediately Tony scooped her up and sat her in the car. Michelle was so out of it she barely noticed. He worked swiftly yet carefully.

Once she was sat down Tony checked her pulse. It was slow but steady. Tony's heart began to pound but tried to keep his cool. He took one last look at Michelle. Her eyes were still squeezed shut and she struggled to take short, quick breaths. Tony forced her eyelids to open to check her pupils.

"How bad is the pain?" he asked seriously. He was desperately trying to keep calm.

Michelle opened her eyes and stared at him, swallowing. "Really bad" she choked out. "It feels like…" she grabbed her abdomen again. "It feels like something just exploded in my stomach" she panted

Tony's face went dark with worry. He wasn't a doctor, he had no idea what to do. He scratched the side of his face and went to lift up her shirt, revealing a flat stomach full of green and yellow bruises.

Tony ran his hands along the bruises, looking for anything out of the ordinary. He noticed a faint purple undertone beneath the healing green and yellow ones, something he hadn't seen before. He furrowed his brow and immediately pulled his cell phone out of his pocket.

Michelle grabbed his arm and stopped him. "No, really I'm okay. I just need some more pain meds, that's all…"

"Like hell you are!" Tony said. "Michelle, this isn't normal, we have to get you back to the hospital…"

"No Tony, please stop! I can't go back there! I just…I can't do anymore of this. No more doctors, no more needles, please…" Michelle felt like she was falling apart inside.

Tony grabbed her face and forced her to look him in the eye. Her skin was so soft and smooth underneath his course palms. He held her face steady, and the firmness of his hands steadied her nerves as well. "Listen to me, Michelle. You are hurt right now. Remember what I said earlier, about you needing to take this seriously? Well now is the time. We need to get you to a hospital, do you understand?"

Tony looked at her face, full of fear and worry. Michelle looked back into Tony's cool and calm eyes and tried to reciprocate. She nodded slowly.

"How about we go to CTU Medical?" he replied softly. His grip relaxed a little, and he brushed a loose curl away from her face. "Would that make you feel better?"

Michelle looked deep into his eyes. He felt them penetrating through her again, but this time she didn't turn away. He could see her, everything about her. It scared her, but breaking that moment scared her more.

"Yes" she whispered softly. "Thank you."

Slowly Tony put his hands down and backed away, breaking their moment. He felt like something had been ripped out of him when he walked away, but hadn't even realized something was there to begin with.

He jumped into the driver's side and sped out of the driveway. Every few seconds he glanced over at Michelle, who was still obviously in a lot of pain. She tried to relax herself by taking slow breaths, but every breath sent a wave of pain through her body. She moaned silently, trying to keep him from hearing.

Tony looked over at her and felt a stab in his own stomach. He instinctively grabbed her hand over the car console and Michelle turned her head toward him. Beads of sweat were gathering on her face, and she looked pale.

He squeezed her hand. "It's going to be okay. We're almost at CTU. Here, show me how much it hurts" he said gesturing toward his hand. Although he hoped this idea would help her concentrate on something else, he needed to do it for his own sanity. He was losing control, and kept flashing back to that night when he saw her body covered in blood.

Michelle did as she was told. She gripped his hand tightly and shut her eyes, trying to concentrate on anything other than the pain. "That's it, good" Tony said. He could feel her starting to relax a little. Michelle sniffed and looked over at him.

"Tony…" she said softly. Her voice was high-pitched and sounded like it was on the verge of tears. "Tony, I'm…I'm so scared" she said. Uncontrollable tears began to fall, and she was losing control. Tony gripped her hand tighter.

"It's going to be okay. I know, I know this is scary. But everything will be fine."

Michelle looked at his face, trying to believe his words. He continued to talk, he knew exactly what was going through her mind.

"I know you're trying to pretend like none of this ever happened. But after today, we can forget about it. The doctors are only going to help, and there is nothing seriously wrong with you. The pain will stop. I know…you're scared of hospitals, probably after what happened to your mother…but that's not going to happen to you. You're safe…I swear. You have to believe me, Michelle."

Michelle stared at him, forgetting about the pain. How did he know all of this? Why did he think that? It was as if he knew her better than she knew herself. His words hit her like a rock, and immediately she believed them. Just one sentence and he was able to bring her into a safe, comfortable place. How…how did he do that?

Michelle turned forward again and closed her eyes, believing everything he said. "How did you know that?" she asked quietly.

Tony looked confused. "What are you talking about?"

"How did you know that I was scared of hospitals? And because of my mother…and how did you know I was trying to hide from this? I didn't even realize it myself. It's like…" she paused, unsure of whether to say it or not. "It's like you can see right through me."

Tony paused and shrugged quietly. "I don't know. I guess…I know you."

They sat in silence for the rest of the car ride, Michelle struggling not to pass out or throw up and Tony struggled to keep it together.

When they finally reached CTU, Michelle was almost unconscious. Tony hadn't even noticed because she was being so quiet, and immediately ran over to the passenger side and flung the door open. He checked her pulse, which was very slow, and carefully scooped her up. She felt so fragile, so light, and she dangled like a doll in his arms. Tony ran inside CTU, carrying Michelle like a baby, who was starting to become more aware of her surroundings by the movement.

"Come on, stay with me" Tony muttered. "Michelle? Can you hear me? Michelle, listen to my voice. You need to stay awake, open your eyes. Michelle, please open your eyes…look at me, talk to me…I need you to stay here, Chelle…you need to stay with me…"

He continued to fly across the parking lot, and Michelle began to groan and mutter in his arms. Her eyelids were half-open, and she struggled to keep them that way. Her body was wet with cold sweat.

"There you go" Tony said. "That's it, keep talking to me, Chelle. Can you hear me? Blink for me, squeeze my hand."

Tony pushed the door to CTU open with his shoulder and sprinted threw the bullpen and main office toward medical. Everyone stared. "I need help!" he yelled. His heart was pounding, adrenaline coursing through his system.

Ryan and George were in the conference room, waiting for them to arrive. When they saw Tony fly through CTU, they stood up, obviously confused. Tony glanced at them and didn't even look back, but continued running toward medical.

He kicked the door to medical open, and ran toward the nearest gurney. Tony carefully laid Michelle's limp body down, and touched the side of her face; it was burning up. Michelle responded to his gesture by moving her face toward his hand, yearning for a gesture of comfort. Keeping his hand on her cheek, Tony pushed the gurney toward the nearest emergency room. She moaned, struggling to stay awake, and Tony continued to talk to her. Inside the room, he found a doctor and nurse, discussing a patient file. They spun around when he entered.

"I need help" he panted. "Now. I don't know what's wrong with her, she just collapsed…"

Tony recognized the doctor as the one who treated Michelle. Glen recognized them too and spurred into action. He checked Michelle's pupils and listen to her heart through a stethoscope. His face turned serious and waved a nurse to set up a table.

"Ms. Dessler?" he asked. "Ms. Dessler, I need you to stay awake."

The nurse hurried over with a thermometer and checked her temperature: 103.4. The nurse's eyes widened and she showed it to the doctor. Tony stood feet away, watching in horror. He had no idea what to do. He had been able to keep control when he had something to do, but now he was helpless.

"What happened, Mr. Almeida?" the doctor asked, throwing him back into reality. Tony stared at him at a loss for words. "Tony" the doctor repeated. "What happened?"

Tony opened his mouth to speak, but no words would come out. He ran both his hands through his hair in frustration and began pacing anxiously. "I don't know," he said. "We were getting in the car to come here, and when she tried to step in all of a sudden she grabbed her stomach and fell over."

Glen squinted curiously and lifted up Michelle's top. Tony glanced over Glen's shoulder and noticed her once green and yellow bruised stomach was now completely purple. "Oh my God" Tony whispered. He thought he was going to puke again.

Glen put his stethoscope against her stomach and Michelle flinched at the cool metal on her bare skin. Her eyes shot open and she shivered. "Tony…" she muttered softly. Tony ran to her head. "It's okay, Chelle…just stay still. We're at CTU, the doctors are taking care of you…" he placed his hand on her cheek again, which felt even warmer than before. Her cheeks were now bright red rather than pale white. Michelle's body shook violently.

"Tony, I'm so….cold" she gasped. Tony scanned the room and grabbed a handful of blankets off the hospital bed. Carefully, he wrapped her shivering body in them like a cocoon, keeping her stomach bare for Glen to examine.

"Sharon!" Glen yelled suddenly. He threw the stethoscope back over his neck and a nurse ran in. "Get an ultrasound tech down here, 20 cc's of morphine, and whatever antibiotics we have in stock." Glen began to push Michelle into another room. Tony grabbed the gurney.

"Wait, where are you going? What's going on?"

Glen sighed and let the nurses run about as they prepared. "I think Michelle's internal bleeding may have been worse than we expected. And she may have an infection from the surgery that is causing her temperature to spike."

Tony was at a loss for words. "Wh…what? How do you screw up on things like that? I thought you said she was fine!"

Glen rolled his eyes. "Look Mr. Almeida…sometimes things happen that are out of our control. No one can predict things like this, and I never made any promises. Either we can stand here bickering over this or you can let me help her. Which will it be?"

When Tony didn't respond, Glen walked out of the room. Tony scanned the room, looking for anyone else. He was left alone with Michelle on the gurney, wrapped up in blankets and shivering. He stared at her bare, purple stomach and felt sick. Trying to feel of use, he covered her exposed abdomen with the blanket, and rubbed her arm to help her warm up. Michelle languidly opened her eyes.

"What's going on?" she asked.

Tony avoided her stare but continued to look down at his hand. "The doctors think you may still be bleeding internally. I think they're going to do an ultrasound."

Michelle nodded and her head rolled to the side. "Michelle?" Tony said. He gently cupped the sides of her face. "Michelle, stay with me." He tapped her cheeks. "Come on, Chelle…"

Glen came barging back into the emergency room and nurses rolled Michelle into another room.

"We're going to take her for an ultrasound and do a few tests, I'll call your desk in about 30 minutes?" Glen asked.

Tony hadn't even considered going back into CTU. 'It's probably best' he thought. "Yeah, sure" he replied. "Just let me know as soon as you learn anything."

Glen nodded and walked away briskly. Tony stood staring at the swinging door for a minute, not wanting to leave. What if she needed him? What if she got scared again? He shook his head and walked away. 'The doctors will call if anything happens' he reassured himself. 'She'll be fine.'

As soon as Tony walked back into CTU, Ryan and George bombarded him with questions. Tony did not want to talk about it and continued to walk straight toward his desk. He picked up the phone and pretended to dial someone. "Tony!" Mason shouted. "What the hell happened?"

Tony slammed the phone back down on the receiver. "I don't know, George!" he yelled angrily. "I don't know what's wrong, we were on our way here, and Michelle just collapsed. They think she's bleeding internally, she could have an infection…I don't know what the hell I did wrong, so just leave it alone!"

Ryan stared at him with disbelief. "You will not speak to your superiors like that, Tony. You know better than to…"

Mason put his hand up. "Ryan, take it easy. Tony's just upset. Give 'em a minute, will ya?" Tony glanced at George and thanked him quietly, even though his blood was still boiling. He sat down and put his head in his hands, messing up his hair. After smoothing it down again, he looked straight ahead.

"I don't know what happened, she was fine this morning. She just keeled over, and on the car ride here she got a really high fever and her stomach turned purple…by the time we arrived, she was practically unconscious and I had to carry her into medical."

Ryan sighed. "Well this is great. I came in for a debriefing and now our key witness is unconscious. This report needs to be into Division by tomorrow morning."

Tony stared him hard in the eyes. "Are you kidding me, Ryan? Michelle almost died and you care about your report to Division?"

George thought Tony was about to blow, so he pushed Ryan back into the conference room to call Division and tell them about the delay. When he came back, George sat down next to Tony.

"Look Tony, I get it, okay? You're pissed, this whole thing sucks. But there's nothing you can do about it, and none of it is your fault…so get over it. For the last time, you pull it together or you're out of the job. Do you understand?"

Tony nodded solemnly. "Yes."

George stood up. "Good. Well, since you're here, why don't you get a heads up on the active protocols?"

Tony stared him down.

"Hey" George responded defensively. "You never really get a day off as Chief of Staff at CTU. Get to work."

Tony was about to call George out as he walked away, but realized it wasn't worth the battle. He would end up doing it anyway, and it wasn't the work that bothered him…it was George's nonchalant attitude that really pissed him off. He sighed. 'I could use the distraction' he thought, and began to work. Twenty minutes later, his desk phone rang.