Thanks so much to everyone who reviewed. You made me smile in the midst of a difficult week. This story won't be long, only 4 chapters, and I have them all written so it's just a matter of finding time to post. If anyone has any ideas they'd like to see incorporated though, I would certainly consider them.

I'm frankly not surprised when Beckett cancels her next appointment. She's on a case, she says. I tell her there's no problem and just to come the next week while I clench my teeth and grit a smile. I really don't want a whole hour to think about my husband or children right now.

But she does show up the next week. We finally reach the reason she lies about remembering anything about the shooting.

"He told me he loved me," the words are quiet, muffled, and tinged with an emotion that I can't quite identify. Shame? Remorse? Confusion?

Oh.

Okay.

Interesting.

Um… totally at a loss here.

"I see. And do you feel the same way?"

She stares at the floor, takes a deep breath and opens her mouth to speak. Then her shoulders drop and she lets out the breath. She shrugs. I think it might be a bad idea to push her at this point.

"Okay, well, has your relationship changed because of his admission?"

"No. I told him I didn't remember."

"His confession?"

"Any of it."

Wow. You're almost more messed up than me and my family. And trust me, that is saying something.

"And why is that?"

Frustration flashes across her face. "Because I don't know! I don't… I just…" she trails off, struggling to figure out her thoughts, "I… It just doesn't seem like a good idea."

"To let him know that you know? Or to love him in return?"

"Both."

"Because…?"

She sighs, "Too much work to have a relationship. Too much work to hide it from my boss and coworkers. Too many opportunities to mess it up and lose him forever."

"So you're not the type of person to go double or nothing?"

She starts and stares at me. "No, I guess not," she replies thoughtfully.

"You'd rather have him stick around forever than be in a relationship with him and possibly lose him?"

"No. Yes. I don't know."

She says that a lot, and always with a little frown on her face that shows me that she's not accustomed to admitting lack of knowledge.

After about this point in the conversation, a whole lot of nothing gets accomplished. I won't bore you with the petty details.

During this appointment and subsequent ones over the next two weeks, I establish several important points.

1. Richard Castle is a total pain and ridiculously immature.

2. Conversely, Richard Castle is amazing and selfless.

3. Richard Castle does not belong in the NYPD.

4. Paradoxically, Richard Castle is a brilliant consultant in the NYPD.

5. Detective Kate Beckett dances around answers but rarely answers them in the manner in which I wish.

6. The new Captain in the precinct is a witch.

7. Richard Castle is totally in love with Detective Beckett.

8. Detective Beckett—wait for it—isn't sure what she feels.

9. Detective Beckett is living in La-La Land.

10. Detective Beckett shows no signs of wanting to leave La-La Land, despite my best hints and subtle prodding.

My conclusion? Confusion.

So… what to do about this? Well, I have to admit, I don't usually run into situations like this. I mean, you must think me completely incompetent, but I assure you I'm usually quite good at my job.

Hmmm… I really like the look of lists such as this. I may have to make other ones. They lay out the information so nicely. Am I boring you with little housekeeping details like this?

Well sor-ry! You don't have to read this then.

Anyways, where was I?

Oh, right. So, I finally get a breakthrough at the fifth meeting. Beckett is really fired up about some woman who was a suspect in a case. Apparently, the woman was not the problem, but the fact that Castle spent the majority of the time flirting with her.

Figures. So I try very hard to kindly show Kate Beckett the error of her inconsistent ways. I explain that she said she doesn't want to date him, so perhaps she should look at this woman as a possible soul mate for Castle. Then Beckett wouldn't have to worry about him being in love with her.

Unfortunately, #5 on my list keeps biting me in the butt. She is really a master at not answering questions. You think she's answered the question because she rattles on and on about it, and only later do you realize that you did not receive any of the information requested.

So, back to square one.

Eventually, we start gaining some ground. She's passed every psyche test, every emotional-ability/capability test, social skills test, personality test, you name it. Yet there are some significant little problems in that interesting mind of hers.

I think she's partly delusional. She seems to think that if she can solve her mother's murder, she'll be free to think about and resolve her little issue with Castle. I don't really have the heart to explain to her that this is just an excuse.

Think about it. Until she solves the murder? Or until she proves the murderer is guilty? Or until he is arrested? Or until he goes to trial? Or until he is convicted? Do you understand my dilemma now? I don't really know how to say this to her nicely.

I try anyway. #5 happens. And some #10. I learn some more things.

1. Detective Beckett once broke up with her boyfriend for Richard Castle. Make that twice.

2. Detectives Ryan and Esposito have bonded with Richard Castle, though the "Witchy" new captain hasn't.

3. Almost everything Detective Beckett talks about rhymes with "Prichard Hassle." Almost everything she smiles about or seems pleased about revolves around said rhyming words.

4. Detective Beckett doesn't seem to notice this.

5. Richard Castle likes ghosts. And spies. And conspiracies. He likes stories and poker and loves his daughter and mother. He is caring and funny and sensitive and clever and curious. He can take a joke too far some times. He likes to work in the precinct. And fight with plastic laser swords. He likes mysteries. And hamburgers.

6. And beautiful young women.

7. Detective Beckett does not approve of this.

Fascinating, really. She is sooooo blind. It's sad, really.

You see, they are stuck right where they are, orbiting one another, helplessly waiting for the other to make the one, definitive move that would either separate the two of them or bind them together irrevocably. But neither of them can make that move, because they are hopelessly caught in the other's orbit, and each is equally strong. They cannot break free and move forward independent of each other, just as they cannot come together. The two circle each other, but are caught by the greater centripetal force of fears and reservations. Mostly hers, from what I see, but perhaps she is that type of person to begin with.

Anyway, planet analogies aside, they seem cemented in their current positions. Each has made several hesitant steps, but always at the wrong time. An offer here, a comment there, a concession, a backward glance… All simply stymied by bad timing. If only a few of these subtle signs had been noticed, perhaps they would not be where they are today.

See what I mean about sad?

So I try. I promise I do truly try. We work out the shooting, old resentment against her father, lingering grief over her mother's death, workplace frustrations.

All of these seem to help, but I worry where she will be after she stops attending these sessions with me. She needs somebody—not wants, not could be helped by, but needs—Castle. Because he sees right through her.

Anyway, I tiptoe around the topic of Castle. I think I'm aiming for some kind of subliminal messaging or something here, because I keep emphasizing how he's always there for her, how they are such great friends. I'm not supposed to be personally invested in her decisions or want her to select a certain path over an equally valid path without a really good reason but…

This counts as a good reason.

I just think she needs to be shoved in order to see the validity of the two of them as a couple. But I'm a therapist, not a personal trainer or boot camp instructor.

So, I guess, the holding pattern will remain.