Disclaimer- I do not own Victorious!
AN- thanks to all who reviewed and again I apologize for the rushing through this, it was not my intention, I've been on a road trip visiting sister's future colleges and this is the first college that has a guest internet cafe… Reade and Review please! Hope you like it!
It was a day full of surprises for Jade. Her worst enemy had found out and despite the fact that Jade treated her like crap, Tori was actually willing to help. And the biggest surprise to Jade was that she allowed Tori to comfort her, she allowed Tori to help her.
Normally, Jade would push away everyone but that's not Jade anymore. When that night was over, the old Jade, the mean and violent Jade, was gone. Now Jade doesn't know who she is anymore. It's like her soul and her body left each other. As she lay on the dirt that night, she watched her soul exit her body and disappear. She's gone, everything about her is gone.
As much as she just wanted to break down and be weak, to let others heal her, she couldn't. She had to pretend to be the same old Jade. She can't, she won't let anyone get suspicious. Her parents are coming back in a few days, so she shouldn't stress. Her parent's constantly told her "what ever it is, honey, we will always be here for you. Don't be afraid to tell us anything." And this was the first time she'll tell them something private. Her dad will help her heal and her mom will help her check for any diseases James might have given her. It'll all be fine when they arrive.
But since that day was far from being near, Jade would have to put on an act. It should be easy, considering the fact that Jade's a good actress. She'll struggle but somehow Jade would do it, even if it kills her she has to do it. No one, especially Beck can ever know. The most important thing in her life was Beck. How would he react to the truth? She couldn't show him her love. They say the best way to prove your love to a guy is you virginity. And Jade was waiting until she was ready to give it to him. He loves her and she loves him. It would have been perfect. But now, now she can't. She had it taken from her by an idiotic bastard. The only thing she could have given Beck was her virginity. But that's impossible now. He would hate her to know she lost it with another guy. A guy she had only known for a week, while she knew Beck for 2 years. It's nearly impossible to get him back now.
She sighed and went to her bedroom. She groaned at the sight of her luxurious bed. How exhausted she was but refused to sleep. Coffee was the only thing that kept her up at night. She sat on it, admiring the silk of her blanket, the comfort of her matrices. But she wouldn't dare to lay down.
She looked over at her nightstand next to her bed. Her phone was vibrating, looked like it was dancing and it scared her. She took her phone to see who was calling. It just had to be him, Beck. She swallowed hard but answered.
"Hello?" Her voice trembled.
"Hey, babe. I wanted to see if you were alright. You left without warning." Beck spoke in the other end of the line.
"Yeah. I'm fine."
"Look, I know what happened." He said. Jade's heart skipped a beat. H-he knows?
"K-know what?" She stuttered. He took a paused which made her tense up even more.
"That James poured something on you. And everyone laughed at you. It's ok. It doesn't matter, he's a jerk. Don't worry about him. I'm sure everyone already forgot about it." Beck explained. Jade felt relieved. She was terrified when he said "I know what happened" But he meant something different. Her body began to shake.
"Oh, um, thanks." Her voice cracked when she said thanks. Her eyes became watery. She was so scared of him knowing. She thought it was all over in that moment. But it wasn't. And she felt so relived.
"Are you sure you're ok? I could stop by if you want."
"No!" She answered too quickly. He couldn't come over. It was one hundred percent chance that she would freak out. With him and her being alone…in a house, she would panic.
"Oh, ok then. I guess I'll be going then." He sounded a bit hurt.
"Ok, night, b-babe" She said making her self sound a bit happier. He hung up. She screamed and it echoed around the house. Her anger had gotten the better of her as she threw everything in her sight around. Making it sound as if she was being murdered by someone else. She grew mad with herself. She made it too obvious that she was hiding something. She squeezed her phone in her hand. She squeezed so hard that she could see her veins on her wrist popping out. She let go slowly. She use to cut herself and her veins were very sensitive.
She relaxed a bit. Her body was shaking still. It was probably because she hadn't slept in two days. And she did not plan to sleep this night either. It would soon be Thursday she thought as she looked at her clock. With Tori coming over, it took away most of her time. Tori left around 9 pm. The rest of the time Jade spent thinking. Now it was 11:59. Six agonizing hours left until she has to go to school. Until then she'll just have to figure out what to do. What can she do? She sighed and laid on her bed. It was so comfortable and so relaxing. She closed her eyes for only a second but then she couldn't open them. She fell asleep.
-Dream-
There she was smiling and laughing with Beck. They were alone in the same house as the party, surrounded by trees. She stopped laughing. Something was calling her to the woods. A little voice was lowering her to the woods. She turned to Beck but he was no longer with her. She looked around for him but he was no where to be found. She swallowed hard. The voice kept getting louder and louder. She decided to follow that voice. It led her down to deeper and deeper in to the woods. Until the voce stopped, she didn't hear anything anymore. She looked around. Where was the way out? She wondered. Then she heard leaves crack, like when someone steps on them. She tensed up and turned to that noise. No one was there. That was when she felt a hand wrap around her waist and she let out a scream. She turned around. At first it was Beck she saw.
"You idiot, you scared me!" Jade said smiling. But then the face changed. It was no longer Beck but James.
"James, what are you doing here?" She asked. James smirked as he kissed her. She tried to push away but it was like she became paralyzed. She couldn't move a muscle. She could only scream. She watched as she was pushed down fiercely. She screamed over and over again but it wouldn't stop. He ripped her apart. She could feel his hands roaming around her body. She can feel they way he looked at her. She felt the way he ripped her apart. She cried and screamed. Once he was done he got up and ran. She laid there crying. That's when she saw Beck. He stood over her.
"Beck!" She cried. He looked at her with disgust.
"You are a slut," He said. Her heart stopped.
"N-no! Please! It wasn't my fault Beck! I swear!" She begged but he only shook his head in disappointment.
"You could have pushed him away. You're strong, you could have done something." He scowled. Jade began to cry at his words. How could he say such things? Didn't he know she was hurting? Why wasn't he caring for her? Why doesn't he care?
Then suddenly a big light came. She was no longer at the woods but at school in the gym. She laid there on the floor bloody, broken and bruised. All the bleachers were filled with people. The spot light was on her. Beck took a step backwards. She looked at all the students. They stood silent. She was scared. But then sudden laughter filled the gym. Every one laughed at her. She began to cry. They were all pointing and laughing at her. She watched as Beck became like them. He began to laugh. That killed her. That made Jade want to die. No one took sympathy for her. The all looked at her with disgust. They all laughed at her. She cried and cried. She sat up and tried covering herself. When she caught a sight of James. His face burned her. He laughed and announced that Jade West was a slut. Then everyone began to chant "Jade West is a slut". She screamed and screamed but the embarrassment would not go away. The laughter, the chanting, it was all killing her. To see Beck be one of them mad her want to kill herself. James came close to her and whispered, "You know it's all you fault." Her eyes grew wide. What was happening to her?
-End of Dream-
Jade woke up sweating and crying. She felt it. She felt his hands on her. It was only a dream but it seemed so real. She felt the way they looked at her. She felt the same pain she did when he had raped her. She was shaking with fear. And she was terrified to get out of bed.
All she wanted was to get out of her pain. She just wants to forget. She began gasping for air. It was as if all the oxygen had left her body. She gasped and gasped but nothing would come. Rushing to the bathroom she turned on the water and slashed some on her face. Slowly air filled her lungs. She swallowed hard as she began to go back to her bed. She curled into a ball. Never in her life had she felt so weak, so powerless. And it's all happening now. But why her?
The sunlight brightened up the room. She looked at her clock. It was 9am. She overslept. She whipped away her tears. She was shaking uncontrollably. She tried getting out of bed, but a fear kept holding her back. She couldn't go to school today. She just wanted to cry all day. She just wanted to be alone. This is why she fears of sleeping. She knew she would relive it. Her mind was taken over by James, by everything that happened that night. And that's what Jade did. Jade laid on her bed and kept wishing it all away.
The end of that day came and Jade had not answered any calls from her worried boyfriend, Beck or her somewhat friend, Tori. She ignored all of them. Then she heard the door bell ring. Curiosity led her to the window to see who it was. It was a lady. She had no clue who she was. But she seemed important. Jade quickly gathered herself up and ran to the door. As she opened it Jade took a deep breath.
"Hello." The woman said to Jade.
"Hi." Jade replied.
"Are you Mrs. And Mr. West's daughter? Jade West, I believe." She asked. Jade nodded.
"May I come in?" She asked. Jade let her in and led her to the living room.
"Lovely home you have." She commented.
"Thank you. Sit down if you want." Jade said softly. The woman smiled and sat down. Jade took a seat across from her.
"So, may I help you in some way?" Jade asked. The woman sighed.
"I…it is about you're mother." The woman said. Jade became confused and looked down but then figured it was probably because the neighbors heard her scream insanely. 'Maybe she's with social services or something…and they think my mother was the one who…yeah I get it now' Jade thought. She looked back up at the woman.
"Oh, my mother's in Europe. My father told me she left on a business trip. My grandmother became ill." Jade explained.
"Well, I don't know how to tell you but your father lied." She told Jade. Jade shook her head in confusion.
"Why would my father lie to me?" Jade asked. The woman looked down.
"Monday morning your mother went missing. You're father called us when she didn't show up. We told him not to worry, to wait until Tuesday to show up. He agreed." She explained. Jade looked at her. What is she saying?
"Anyways, Monday night…we found your mother." The woman said looking down once again.
"Where is she then? If she's not in Europe then where is she?"
"I'm sorry to tell you but s-she's…dead." The woman said. Jade grew pale. Dead? No that can't be.
"My dad said she was in Europe! And if she was dead then why isn't my father here because he would have told me this personally instead of having a stranger come and tell me!" Jade exclaimed.
'This woman is clearly lying!' Jade thought.
"I'm sure he didn't want you to know yet. I don't think he is coming back, I'm sorry. A-and that's why I'm here. We're looking for you father." She said.
"Why?" Jade asked outraged of what this woman was telling her.
"He stole money from the bank. We need that money. It wasn't his to take." She said.
"Well I don't know where he is. And I don't want to hear this anymore! Save your bull shit for someone else!" Jade shouted. Jade stood up and the woman took her lead.
"But I need to tell you what you're mother left you in her will. The house is now yours and the money goes to you too. You're father took most of that money. It belongs to you. We need to find him."
"I don't care! Just get out!" Jade screamed.
"An agent will stop by sometime next week to discus where you'll be living. Seeing as you're underage and alone, you can not live on your own." The woman said on her way out.
Jade slammed the door shut.
'My mother is dead and my dad is no where to be found. I…no! They're lying! My mother is in Europe. And any day she will be coming back. Her and my dad will come back. I know it. They can't leave me. They can't leave. I still have to tell them I was rapped. They have to help me get over this. How can they be gone? They can't be. Not yet! Not now! I need them! I-I want them here!' Jade shouted in her mind. She ran to the phone and dialed her mother's number.
"She'll pick up, I know it." Jade said to herself. The phone only rang once.
"I'm sorry but the number you are trying to reach has been disconnected." The line said. Jade dropped the phone as she began to shake. Why is this all happening to her? Was it a punishment for getting raped?
Jade screamed out loud.
"NO! THEY ARE NOT DEAD! I'M DREAMING" she screamed. She was in denial. Her rape, her mother's death and her father's disappearance. It was all too much for her. She couldn't take it. He father is alive but is not coming back. Her mother was gone. Jade went crazy, throwing everything around her. She pulled her hair and screamed. This wasn't her life anymore. This wasn't the way she wanted it. And she is not moving from this house. This is her house. She should be able to stay there. No, it's all wrong!
AN- SO I'm done…in my opinion I think the beginning was a bit rough. So I apologize for that. But any way review please! And don't worry I will make Beck more involved, just later in the story. So again please review and I hoped you liked it. (:
*Worst one hour and a half story….yes I wrote this in an hour and a half so give me credit, I tried at least! .*