Disclaimer: I don't own anything except Sevilen, Lily, and Ethan.

A/N: Sorry it's taken soooo long. I actually lost this chapter (my computer ate it) and had to redo the whole thing. I added the whole song part into this. The song is "May It Be" from Enya. I thought it was appropriate for the relationship between Hermione and her son.

Part II Chapter 19: May It Be

MAY IT BE AN EVENING STAR SHINES DOWN UPON YOU

Hermione searched the house for Ginny. That girl was harder to find than a needle in a haystack, to use the Muggle expression. She had asked Ron, the twins, and even Harry to no avail. The room they shared was empty but something shiny caught her attention on Ginny's bed. Hermione walked over and saw what looked like a pensieve. She looked around, to make sure she was alone, and cautiously looked inside.

When Hermione pulled herself from the memory, she fell to the floor. She couldn't believe what she had just witnessed. Her thoughts were a jumbled mess and she wasn't sure whether she could trust Draco ever again or run… in the opposite direction. She was just standing up when there was a knock on the door. "What?" she demanded, a little too harshly.

"Um, your son is screaming his head off downstairs," Ron's voice came through the closed door.

Hermione realized that she never lifted the silencing charm on the room and silently cursed herself. She turned to the door, wondering why she could hear Ron, when she saw that the door was open. "Thanks, Ron. Why can't I hear him though?"

Ron ran a hand through his unruly red hair. "Mum had to put a silence on him. He woke up Mrs. Black's portrait."

Hermione brushed past Ron and ran down the stairs. There, in the living room, stood Mrs. Weasley holding a panicking Sevilen. Hermione ran over to them and took her child out of the older woman's hands. "I am so sorry, Mrs. Weasley. I should have been paying closer attention to my son." Hermione held Sevilen's head to her shoulder.

"It's alright, Hermione. Just take him up to your room. I think he's just tired. It's way past 2 in the afternoon," she said.

Hermione nodded her head and made her way back to the room. Once inside, and the door closed, she placed another set of silencing charms around the room before she lifted the one on her son. As soon as his voice came back, Hermione almost dropped him because of how loud he was. She hugged him to her chest and bounced him a little. "Shh," she said, trying to get him to quiet down. It was then that she remembered a certain song that her mum used to sing to her to quiet her down.

"Mornie utúlië

Believe and you will find your way

Mornie alantië

A promise lives within you now."

She looked down and saw that Sevilen had, indeed, fallen asleep while she sang. She carefully put him into his crib and fell back onto her bed. Tears welled up into her eyes and fell silently down towards her pillow. She thought her life was confusing before but now she wasn't sure what was going to happen. At least in school, she knew what she was supposed to do. Defeating Voldemort was the main goal. Now… she wasn't so sure. She rolled over onto her side and stared at the wall until sleep claimed her.

WHEN THE NIGHT IS OVERCOME MAY YOU RISE TO FIND THE SUN

Hermione woke the next day to find herself staring at Ginny, Sevilen wrapped in her arms. She stretched and made her way over to the two sleepy heads. She pried Sevilen away and laid him in his crib then walked back over to Ginny. "Ginny? Ginny?"

Ginny stirred and slowly opened her eyes. "Too bright," she mumbled and pulled the sheet up over her head.

Hermione looked over at the window and saw that the sun was shining brightly on the newly fallen snow. "Ginny, it's a beautiful day."

"I don't care."

Hermione sighed and put her hands on her hips. "If we don't get downstairs within the next few minutes, we will be in loads of trouble."

"I don't care."

"Did you forget that today is Christmas?"

Ginny threw her covers to the floor and jumped up. "Oh shit!" she exclaimed as she made a mad dash for the bathroom. Hermione rolled her eyes and she got Sevilen's clothes together. He was stirring as she was humming.

"Mummy?" he asked sleepily.

Hermione rushed over to him and picked him up. She saw him rubbing his eyes and helped to get the sleepies out. "How's my man?" she asked.

"Dada," he whined.

"Dada isn't here right now," Hermione stated. "Let's get you dressed. It's Christmas and I'm sure Santa brought you a few things."

"Sanna?" he asked, his eyes sparkling.

Hermione giggled. "Yes, Santa. Now, let's get dressed and go downstairs."

After a few minutes and dressing her son and then herself, she made her way down to the living room. Sevilen bounded behind her, occasionally bumping into her legs. "Careful, Sevilen," Hermione said. "You'll make mummy fall."

"Sorry," he said then sprinted past her and into the living room.

Hermione followed and saw that the rest of the house was already up and busy tearing presents apart. "Happy Christmas," she said. Everyone greeted her back as she took a seat next to Harry and Persephone. "When did everyone else get up?" she asked.

"Oh, only about 15 minutes ago," Harry answered. "We were going to come and get you and Ginny if you didn't get down here in the next couple of minutes. Do we still need to get Ginny?"

Hermione shook her head. "Nah. She's in the bathroom hopefully getting ready."

A few minutes later, Ginny showed up and sat down by herself in the far corner. Ron tried talking to her but she wasn't in the mood. She went through the motions of opening up presents but showed no facial expressions. Hermione felt bad for her but was too busy making sure Sevilen thanked everyone that had given him a gift. After the gifts were opened, Mrs. Weasley stated that breakfast would be ready in 10 minutes. The older people in the house were already getting in their early morning naps while the younger set out to the backyard for snowball fights. Except for the girls, who managed to stay inside. Hermione was playing with Sevilen when Lily called her over.

"What's up, Lily?" she asked.

"This came for you a few minutes ago. I didn't want anyone to see it," the older woman stated while handing Hermione a wrapped package.

Hermione took it and found out that it was heavy. It was wrapped in a plain brown wrapper. "Thanks. Who sent it?"

Lily looked around and it seemed as though she was looking to make sure no one was around. "I think it's from Severus."

Hermione's breath caught in her throat. "Ok," she said.

Lily placed her hands on Hermione's arms and looked into her eyes. "It's alright. I made sure that it was safe."

"Thanks again. Can you watch Sevilen?" Hermione left without waiting for an answer and made her way up to her room. She sat down on the bed and stared at the package. She made herself open it and saw that it was a book. Inside, the pages were blank. Returning to the first page, she saw a note.

Ms. Granger,

This is a book for your most inner thoughts. I hope you will find things to write about. See you tomorrow.

S. Snape

Hermione closed the book as a single tear fell down her cheek. She swiped it away angrily and tossed the book onto the floor. He had been sending mixed signals to her since she returned to England. She wrapped her blanket around her body and ignored the shouts coming from outside. She just wasn't in a celebrating mood at the moment.

MAY IT BE WHEN DARKNESS FALLS YOUR HEART WILL BE TRUE

The next day, Hermione walked into the headmaster's office. She hadn't seen this place for three years but it still looked the same. She couldn't believe that Snape had taken over. It was hard to think that the Ministry trusted him enough to watch over the future. She ran her hand over the smooth mahogany desk and looked down. Financial reports and teacher schedules littered the top, almost as if Snape was in a hurry. He was usually so neat and organized. She decided to, at least, put the documents into two piles. As she set the last down, the door opened.

"What are you doing?" Snape asked.

Hermione blushed. She couldn't look him in the eye. "You sent me a note saying that you needed to speak with me," she said, barely above a whisper.

Snape made his way over to his desk and sat in his chair. "Sit," he stated, gesturing to one of the stiff high-backed chairs.

Hermione sat, folded her hands, and looked down at her feet. She felt like a student again and as if she were in trouble. She knew she had to have this talk with him but she didn't now what to say. She took a deep breath to steady her nerves. "Do you remember the day of graduation?"

"I do," Snape responded. "But I hardly think this is the time to reminisce seeing as Lucius is planning his attack on the school."

"If I wait for the opportune time, Sir, I will never be able to tell you." Hermione emphasized the word "Sir" almost as if she were mocking him.

"Why does one sexual encounter warrant a talk in the first place?"

"First of all, you were the one that wanted to talk. Secondly, was that all it was to you? Sex? Didn't you have any feelings?" Hermione felt tears welling up in her eyes but she refused to let him see her cry.

"What else would you call it? We had sex on my table. We didn't make love because we weren't in love," he said matter-of-factly. A single tear slipped from Hermione's eye and she silently cursed him for his cruel remarks. Snape handed her a tissue, which she almost refused, but took it. As she wiped her eyes, more tears fell. "Ms. Granger, you were never this emotional. What is the problem?"

"So… so you never had any feelings?" she asked, almost choking on her words.

Snape sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "Hermione," he began but was cut off when the office door blasted open.

Hermione and Snape jumped up at the same time, wands pointed. "Expelliarmus!" Their wands flew into the hands of a very tall and muscled Snake Charmer. Before Severus had a chance to respond, a bright silver flash flew from the Charmer's wand and hit Hermione right in the chest. She fell to the floor and the guy quickly disappeared from the room, their wands still clutched in his hand. Snape ran over to her and frantically searched for a pulse. He breathed a sigh of relief when he found it. He gathered her up in his arms, walked over to the fireplace, and threw in some floo powder.

"Grimmauld Place, Molly Weasley," he shouted into the fire.

He waited impatiently until the matriarch's head poked through. "What is it, Severus?"

"Molly, make arrangements. I'm bringing Ms. Granger back. There has been an attack here. She's unconscious but alive."

Molly's eyes widened in fear as she answered him. "Of course. Just be careful."

"I will be there in just a few moments." Severus said goodbye then carefully picked Hermione up. "Stay with me," he muttered to her as he made his way out of the office and down to the main doors. He kept his guard up but felt no threats anywhere. As soon as he was outside the grounds, he apparated to Grimmauld Place.

Once inside, he was ushered into the sitting room where the couch had been transfigured into a bed. He carefully put Hermione on the bed and drew up a cover. Molly ran from the room and returned with Ginny. Ginny made her way over to Hermione. "I will need everyone to leave the room. I need to examine her."

"I will stay," Severus demanded.

Ginny glared at him. "I said everyone. That means you as well." She watched until Molly steered him from the room. She then turned back to her friend to examine her. After Ginny examined her, she called Snape into the room. "I'm not sure what curse has been used. It's almost as if a multitude of them was used." Ginny shook her head. "I've gathered some data in my wand. I'll see if I can break them down."

Snape stared at the unmoving body of Hermione. "Will she wake up?"

Ginny shrugged. "Only time will tell. It's almost like she's in a coma. I need to do some research. If I discover anything, I will let you know."

Before Ginny could leave, Snape grabbed her wrist. "Report only to me," he stated. He turned his head to look at the young healer and she nodded. He released her and Ginny left the room, rubbing her wrist. Snape turned back to Hermione and sat down next to her bed. He felt silly but he wanted to talk to her. "To answer you question, Ms. Granger, I did have feelings. Every time I saw you sitting in my class I just wanted to take you. The day of graduation was no different. Then, after we had sex, I wanted more. But how could one so young, with so much ahead of her, want some old man hanging around? I had to let you go. And it looks like my decision was worth it. You are a potions apprentice and you have a son. I don't think I ever want to know who the father is because I think it would just break my heart to know someone else held you close."

Severus sighed and took her hand in his. He brought it up and lightly kissed her knuckles. "Wake up, please?" He put his head down onto the bed next to her. "Damn it all. It should have been me. I should have been the one to have gotten cursed."

Ginny watched silently as her old professor cried. She had never seen him so vulnerable. She wished Draco felt the same way about her.

A/N: I hope you like this. I wrote this on a snow day. My work (I work at a daycare) closed because of the snow and I was soooo bored. LOL