Good flaming tater tots of doom, I shouldn't be awake. It's nearly four in the morning, and I've an interview tomorrow. I see coffee in my future.

Greetings, to Neci Mahariel; the Curious George of the Dales. Granted, with less breaking things and more questions. Many, many questions.

Previous disclaimers and invitations apply. I also invite you to pelt me with other invasive and possibly embarrassing questions that he can ask. Again, thanks to Hatsepsut for her support; you may be Queen of Smut, but you're still a sweetheart. So there.

Quid Pro Quo, Neci...

"What's it like to be a Golem?"

"What does it mean to be of the Qun? What does Qun even mean?"

"Was it terribly lonely, living with only your mother?"

"What's it like living underground?"

"Where you really a Templar?"

"How old are you, really?"

"What's that?"

"Why do they call it a Circle, and not a Square?"

"Why are you called 'Shale' if you're made up of granite?"

"What's it like to be a spider?" (this question nearly ended in disaster)

"Have you always liked men?"

Zevran blinked and looked over at the springy elf. "I beg your pardon?"

Neci flushed and waved his hands before him as if to ward off potential attacks. "I just wondered, since you seem to flirt with Alistair a lot." He averted his eyes, easily side-stepping a thorny bush. "Am I making a fool of myself? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend."

He nearly laughed at the cowed youth. Out of all the invasive questions asked of all their companions, he would choose this one to be embarrassed by. "My dear Warden, you need never fear that I will be offended." Not necessarily true, but what can you do? "An interesting question. In Antiva, especially so for the Crows, we are slightly more liberal with our affections. Is it not the same for the Dalish?"

It almost seemed as if his head would spin off, he shook it so fast. "No, every one of us belongs to our clan as a whole; everything in us goes towards the revival of Arlathan." As he spoke, Neci made wide gestures, seeming to encompass everything around him. It never ceased to impress Zevran how the young elf would look at everything except where he was going, and still be as graceful as the Halla his people would herd. "I've never heard of any man liking other men, it's a very new concept. Is it very different from being with a woman?"

A slow smile spread across Zevran's face like oil on a lovers skin. "Ah, Warden; it is impossible to simply describe the pleasures of being with a man." He slid his gaze over to hover over his Dalish brethren. "It would be simpler to…" During this small interim, he'd been carefully herding Neci closer and closer to the edge of the path; now he took his chance and trapped him against a tree, one arm on either side of a slim waist. "It would be simpler only to demonstrate," he said, breathing the shared air between the two.

Neci blinked a bit, a blush creeping over his ears, (how delightful, Zevran thought) before he brightened with understanding. "Oh, of course!" He exclaimed, clapping his hands together. "I'll just go get Alistair, and you can show me!"

Zevran's mind and libido stuttered to a halt. "What?"

"Great idea, Zevran."

"N-no, I'm-"

"I'll be just a moment; Alistair, wait a bit. I need your help with something."

"I don't think you understood me, if you would just hold still-"

"Ye~s?"

"Zevran was going to show me something, and I need your help."

"Ordinarily I wouldn't be against this, but-"

"Ask away."

"Braska."

Who does cliche? I does cliche. Also bad grammar.