Chapter 5

Ancient History

While I was upstairs, he had replaced the old ragged cot with the twin bed I'm now relaxing on. He seems to have made several changes in the cell, including new bedding, soap, towels, and a toothbrush, a basket of snack foods, and even a stack of books.

I can't tell time and so I don't know how long it takes him to return with food for me. I hear a sound, a slight click and see he has just left my cell. I jump up startled and see he has left a tray for me and he is once again standing silently outside my cell. It seems he has brought me everything I mentioned and I hear my stomach growl in response to the food.

He laughs, and it's such an unfamiliar sound I snap my head up to look at him. "Your stomach is growling petite fille. Such a human response surprises me. Eat! No need that you should go hungry."

I carry the tray to the bed and pull the chair up, creating a makeshift table so I don't have to sit and balance it on my knees. He's thought of everything, and I can imagine everything on the tray being served in a fine cafe somewhere back home. The salad is lovely with several rich lettuces, tomatoes, olives and feta cheese. There is dark bread, olive oil, a hard white cheese, and fresh pears. He's even left a small bottle of wine and a glass. I try to remember my manners and not tear into the food I'm so hungry. Again I hear his gentle laughter.

"Imagine feeling like you do now, but trying to resist the food you desire most. Could you sit in there and look at that tray and not eat? How long do you think you could hold out my dear? I mean, even if you could take away the fact of starvation...would you be able to resist? Knowing that one tiny bite would mean failure...one small olive, one sip of wine...one crumb of bread. Could you deny yourself?"

I pause to listen to him with a roll already in my hand. I can feel it's softness just beneath the outer crust and I am looking forward to tasting it dipped in olive oil. Still I feel I have to answer him. I reluctantly put the roll back on the tray and stand. When I face him, less than a foot separates us and I can see my reflection in the glass as well.

"So to you I'm nothing more than a few leafy greens and some bread? Listen, you know I'm hungry, and maybe it gives you some perverse sense of satisfaction to try to make me see things your way like this. But there's a difference here your example doesn't cover; and that's that when you eat, someone dies. As hungry as I am, if it meant the death of someone, you can be sure I'd resist. Why do you think I'm a vegetarian in the first place? I don't want to take life to sustain my own – even animal life."

"Querido, I truly did not mean to make such a comparison. Please eat, forget I said anything I was merely pointing out how sustenance too can become a strong desire." He looks as if he is upset by my argument. "Please forgive me...it is not right that I should transfer my guilt onto you. You have done nothing wrong, and I have done...everything. Please eat."

I go back to my roll and it is heavenly. He watches me eat, and it's hard not to feel self conscious. But I'm hungry and I finish off everything he brought. I set the tray aside with nothing but the wine left. I open a bottle of water instead.

"So, what can you tell me about yourself, besides that you're old and bored and want to drink my blood? I mean, where do you come from if you're not what Bram Stoker wrote about?" I try hard not to sound too impressed with him, but he's very imposing as he stands and watches me. I don't expect him to answer, and it startles me when he speaks.

"So many people I have known would say I am Romanian; I've lived in this country for nearly a thousand years. I speak the language better than a native, and I have adapted my name as well. But I was born in Greece around 509 a.d. My family was fairly wealthy as we owned olive groves which produced fine olive oil. But I was not destined to go into the family trade. I went to school instead and studied under some of the best philosophers of my time. I had a love for politics and enjoyed the sound of my own voice. Fortunately so did many others and everywhere I went people would gather to hear me speak. Roman rule was taking over and more and more the life I knew was being subverted to Christianity. It seemed almost daily there was something new to rail against, and the crowds came out to hear me more and more. Sometimes I felt if I wanted to lead a revolt, I could easily gather an army to follow me.

"Emperor Justinian closed the schools I loved, where philosophy was taught. I held a major rally. All the learned men came out to hear me speak. I spoke of resistance to Roman authority in our daily lives, I ranted against Christianity and it's monotheism which threatened to ruin our way of life. And I praised the philosophers of our time who were on the cutting edge of modern thinking. I was young, brash, and arrogant and I thought I was invincible. It is a pity the Romans did not see me in such a favorable light."

He stops talking. I can tell he is about to tell a somber part of his tale just by the dark look on his face. He has very expressive eyes, even though the color continually reminds me that he is a killer. I can't help but watch him as he continues his tale.

"I was engaged at the time. As good as married actually, to a wonderful and beautiful woman named Tessa. It tears my heart out that I cannot remember the exactness of her face. I would give more than you could possibly know to be able to recall just one clear memory of her. Long dark hair, rich brown eyes, luminescent olive skin...such a general description it could be any woman. But my Tessa was...all I ever really wanted. I loved her the depth of the sea and the vastness of the starry sky. It was only a few short weeks until we were to be married and she would be mine for keeps." He stops talking and I wonder if he will cry. I want to cry myself since clearly his story does not end happily.

"Just before my last speech, I spent time with her. She seemed nervous about it and begged me not to stir up trouble. I remember kissing her sweet lips...and reassuring her that everything would be fine. Of course you can already guess it was never fine again." He paces, running his hands through his hair. It seems so strange to hear him talk about life in Greece, where I imagine he would wear togas, or some kind of flowing robes He paces outside my cell in nineteenth century style. Black pants over shiny black shoes, high collar white shirt, button up vest, and heavy black coat. He looks like he's from the turn of the last century.

"The crowd gathered and there were more people than I had ever had come to hear me. Oh and I spoke with the fire and fervor that had them hanging on my every word. I had selected a place where my voice would echo out to the crowd and reach more ears. It was a glorious feeling! But so caught up was I in swaying the crowd, I paid no attention to what was coming behind me. At the height of my speech I was arrested! Which is a polite way to say I was beaten unconscious and dragged away in chains.

"The charges were numerous and each time I was told, the list seemed to grow. Some of them I was indeed guilty, but others were made up and groundless. Still they put me into an underground cell and seemed to forget about me for a week. I was not used to being treated so poorly and it did not take long for me to lose hope. After a week I had visitors. Family and friends came and went, but each of them told the same story, that I was likely facing execution for my crimes against the Roman authority. I tried to get someone to mount some kind of defense for me, but they were all afraid to be associated with me. It was as good as done in their eyes.

"My time of marriage came and went and still I was locked up. I became despondent and lost all hope. That is when I was visited by a deity. Later I could say he truly looked like an angel he was so beautiful. He had long blond hair the likes of which I had never seen on a man or woman. Skin as pale as alabaster, and a face that would never be forgotten by any who saw it. He came right into my cell, opening the iron door as if it were nothing to him. He introduced himself as Caius." He says the name with venom and I expect him to spit to get the taste out of his mouth. I hang on every word as he seems a thousand miles, or more like a thousand years, away.

"In the hours between dusk and dawn he outlined a new plan for me; a plan where I would not die. Oh, and the wondrous things he told me...about how I would be able to have my Tessa...about how I would live in luxury and riches...about how people would adore me...and about how I would live a long and happy life. And all of this in exchange for one year of training and service. The way he explained it, I would be more like a god than a man. He told me I would need a year to learn how restrain my strength and glory so that I could live among those who are not gods. He told me that in a year I could come back and claim my Tessa and she too could be a goddess.

"I wanted to laugh or argue with him, but he stood before me clearly not of my world. He invited me to attack him and I could not even harm him, though he raised no defense. He punched holes through the walls of my cell with his bare hands and moved so fast I could not see him. Even though I sensed there might be something he was not telling me, I was certain my only other alternative was death. I made the bargain with Caius and just before dawn he attacked me.

"I was sure that he was killing me and I fought against him with all the strength I had. It was not enough, and when he left me I was barely clinging to life. The pain was excruciating. I feel like I had been thrown into a furnace but somehow I was not killed instantly. I felt every part of me die and catch fire. I wondered if I was actually being executed by burning, but there was no smoke or flames. There was only hour upon hour of agony, and my screams brought no relief. I felt my heart stop and the terrible burning was nothing compared with the sense of loss I felt over all I feared I would never see again. I knew that I was dead and I wondered if my soul was doomed to hover over my body forever. The philosopher in me wondered what my afterlife would be like and I tried to shed myself of my body.

"I was amazed when the body came with me. When I could stand up in my cell I was clearly not the man I used to be. I spent time mimicking what I had seen Caius do and I felt I had indeed become a god. I heard a rat scurry out of my cell and I could not believe how much of it I could hear. It's paws tapping on the rock, it's breathing, and it's tiny rapid heartbeat were all perfectly clear in my new godlike ears. I followed it. There were other cells, and they were mostly empty, but two were not. I tore the doors off of one. The man inside did not stand a chance and I feed on him before I even realized I felt the need. His blood was like nothing I had ever tasted – ambrosia of the gods. More powerful and satisfying than anything I had ever consumed, and I wanted more

"Fortunately the jail was small and I was forced to limit my kills to five before I rushed out into the day, free to be a god. Even my skin shone like diamonds in the sun. I felt powerful and important and I found the place of my oratory and began speaking. In minutes I had a crowd, and in an hour there was a huge throng of people listening to me, watching me, amazed at my power and beauty. I held them in the palm of my hand, including the Roman soldiers who had come to stop my speech. I was invincible! There were hundreds if not thousands of them and I was their god! It was clear to me that I was to lead those people, and I knew they would worship me, bow down to me, and make blood sacrifices to me. I saw it in their eyes, heard it in their voices, in their raw admiration.

"It was then he returned. Caius. Just as I would go into the crowd and collect my blood offerings he returned to remind me of the price of my godhood. One year. I wanted to fight him, I wanted to challenge him, but I feared that maybe as he had given me the gift, he could also take it away. I went with him, leaving behind all I knew. As we traveled he taught me the language of the Romans. He taught me a new law unto those of our kind. Not one of open adoration by our subjects, but one of secrecy and careful selection to avoid notice. He told me we should never be seen in the sunlight and never to give away our secret. Secret! I was assaulted by the idea that a god would need to keep his majesty secret, but Caius told me it was the law. Who made these laws? I would certainly find out I vowed."

I listen raptly as he tells his story. His voice is oddly hypnotic, even through the speakers. I don't interrupt, even to ask questions, his story is fascinating. I'm not sure how long he speaks, but it feels late and I catch myself yawning. I'm not sure why I'm so tired, maybe it's the stress, or maybe a side effect of the drugs. I can barely keep my eyes open, and he finally notices.

"You need to sleep poco essere umano, I will speak with you in the morning. If you need anything, I will hear you if you ask." He leaves me, and I take off the pants and belt before I cover up in the bed. I spend a little time lying awake wondering if I'll wake up in the morning. I wonder what he does with all the time he has since he clearly doesn't need to sleep. I imagine him prowling through the darkness looking for victims to drink. The thoughts seem incongruous with the arrogant creature who looks more like he belongs in a library or a museum than a monster movie.

I can't believe how much the books and movies got wrong. He doesn't sleep during the day, and he didn't seem affected by the sunlight. He's fast and strong, but he doesn't read minds or change into animals. He's not affected by the cross since I ran across one as I explored and he was fine handling it. And the wood he broke off in his hand didn't seem to bother him either. He has no fangs. I don't know why that bothers me so much, but I guess it's because he just looks so close to human without them. He does drink blood. Oh yes, I don't think I'll ever forget that little truth. And even though he insists he can not, I know he can enthrall me. I close my eyes and drift off.