Chapter 7

Volterra

He has returned. I'm calmer after my tirade, but I still don't have any idea what he plans to do with me. He's tried his speeches on me, but unless he opens the door, they don't seem to hold much power over me. He has me so confused, a part of me wants to cooperate with him, and a part of me wants to fight for all I'm worth.

I watch him as he paces outside my cell. He's a bundle of pent-up energy and I wonder if he notices how loud his heels are on the old stone when he gets agitated. I wonder if he knows that like me, he too talks with his hands when he's excited. The partition between us has saved my life. I can see that now that my mind is clear of his devastating charm. I know that even though it's locked against me, he can easily open it with his key. I try not to think about how he could come straight through the wall if he chose as well.

Even without whatever it is that had me fawning over him, I still can't take my eyes off of him. The man is beautiful – drop dead gorgeous. Even if I could put him next to all the leading men in Hollywood he would still outshine the mere mortals. His voice is hypnotic, even through the speakers . I want to believe everything he says and do everything he commands. I am grateful he hasn't commanded me to do anything but stay away from him.

I still don't know what he plans to do with me, but I am confident that he won't kill me; at least until I've heard his story. He also assures me he has someone on the way who will help him figure out the strange electric attraction between us. Locked behind the glass I can now see what he's talking about. It stuns me that he feels the same attraction toward me, considering how deadly it can be for me. Even more, I am overwhelmed that it is me who has that kind of affect on him. I mean I'm used to having the attention of men. I'm a blond, blue-eyed, tan, fit, California girl, and that kind of fits with so many stereotypes that men look for.

It has always been hard for me to find men willing to look beyond the package to who I really am on the inside. Before my dad got really sick the men were falling at my feet like ripe fruit from the trees. Still, I would find out on the first date that the fruit wasn't just ripe, it was rotten. They wanted nothing more from me that whatever they thought I would allow them to do to me. So many dates would be polite at the door with my dad, only to attack me later, while making declarations of love, lust, and need.

What baffles me about Stefan is that he seems to feel the same kind of attraction to me as the men I've dated. And yet when I consider his age, his control, and his supernatural abilities, I have no idea why that is. I'm sure he's come across pretty girls before without experiencing the kind of attraction he seems to feel toward me. I only wish his attraction for me didn't include my blood.

Without warning he leaves, and soon returns with more food. He warns me to get away from the door, and he sets the tray inside, like the world's fastest waiter. Even from my corner I feel drawn to him and it's only his command that keeps me from flying into his arms.

Once again on the other side he appears to take a minute to calm himself, all the while staring at me hungrily from his side of the partition. I try not to pay attention to the raw lust on his face, and I check out what's on the tray. He's brought me a selection of desserts and my mouth waters just looking at them. Sugared pecans, strawberry cheesecake, baklava, and a thick wedge of dark chocolate cake. He has also left the bottle of wine even though I have yet to taste it.

"Okay, you can't lie to me now, I know you're trying to make me fat." I smile his way so he knows I'm joking. "This is way too much for one person...there's probably two days calories here."

He looks a little embarrassed as he shrugs. "I did not think about that. I simply purchased the things that I would like to eat if I could. Mon bel – Summer – I know I am making mistakes. I shop for food and I do not even know for what I am looking. My last real meal was..." He looks suddenly upset. "I cannot even remember! It was with her...Tessa my fiance...there were grapes...that is all I remember; feeding her grapes." I can see the sadness on his face as he seems to be reliving a moment that happened before the dark ages.

He shakes himself out of his reverie and waves his hand in my direction. "Please eat. And you should try the plum wine, they make it locally and it is quite well known." I don't waste time arguing about getting fat, but I instead savor a few bites of every dessert. I also try the wine, and it's perfect after all the sweetness. I don't usually drink, so I limit myself to half a glass. The whole time I eat, he watches me, and I can see he is pleased every time I exclaim over how delicious the food is to me. As soon as I've eaten more than enough, I pull the chair in front the glass and sit to watch him.

"Summer, do you have any idea what a cult is? I mean do you know how easy it is to twist someone's beliefs and use them for your own ends? I am amazed how easy it is to steal the will from a human being and make them do...anything you wish. Have you ever seen anything like that?" His eyes have an intensity that sends shivers down my spine.

"I live in California. There are churches to every religion, and every denomination of those religions. Not to mention every type of spirituality that can be dreamed up. I've seen people worship crystals, pyramids, music, and celebrities, and that's before you add in drugs and drinking. On the news they tell of mass suicides of one, and the suicide bombing of another. Maybe I have never seen it first hand, but I've definitely heard about it, Stefan.

He nods as I speak. "Well, no matter what you know of such things, what I saw in Italy was so much more than that. Caius took me to a remote city. One surrounded and fortified by a high stone wall. It was there that I learned first hand about becoming a god. He introduced me to Marcus and his beautiful wife, as well as Aro who was unmarried at the time. There were others like us, of course, but the three of them were elevated somehow above the others. I am not sure how or why, but it was an uncontested agreement. They were the unholy trinity of law makers, the ones who would decide who lived and who died, for both human and god alike.

"At first I was in awe of them. They truly presented themselves as gods, clothing themselves in the finest of robes and jewels. They listened to no arguments against what they declared to be law. They granted favor to those of our kind who pleased them, and they punished those who did not. And the city was built around them. They subverted the strengthening Christian church to their own needs. They set themselves up in the eyes of the humans as religious leaders, adopting the Roman religious hierarchy and declaring the humans from the surrounding villages and communities to be their subjects. It was so well planned I was shocked that I could play any part in what they had built.

"But they wanted me. They actually needed my talent for speaking. You see, Caius had heard me speak on the day I was arrested. That canny vulture recognized that I had a gift, and he took a chance that it would only become stronger once I was changed. He was right. My gift for gathering crowds and getting people to listen to me was now much more of a command. I found out early that I could draw in a crowd. People would drop what they were doing and come close to hear me. Even more, if it was something that I was passionate about, I could convince them with my very words to believe me and follow me. I could change their minds entirely. It worked unerringly with humans, whether it was two or two thousand.

"The Volturi used this gift to bring in worshipers. I could stand on a high parapet and speak to the crowds below and they would come! Today in Volterra it is against our laws to kill anyone who is a resident of the city and the surrounding countryside. But at the time there was no such law. We used the Christian faith to draw fresh human victims from across the country, from across the continent even, as they would come to find spiritual guidance. Volterra it is said, is the place to come for enlightenment. It is the place to become closer to God through the religious leadership of the holy anointed Volturi." He says the word like it's poison in his mouth.

"Summer, my first year I drew tens of thousands to their eventual deaths. Men, women, children and even infants were sacrificed to the appetites of the Volturi, and I fed alongside them, basking in the glory of my own deity!" He looks thoroughly disgusted.

"When it became clear that people in the area were terrified of the city and it's inhabitants, a law was passed that they be left alone. No one was to hunt in or near Volterra. Once again people were flocking to the city, each hoping to get a glimpse of the holy anointed ones. Perhaps to hear a word from the chosen Orator; who was me.

"Of course the new law meant that we had to hunt further from our home, and so we would travel, spreading the word of the amazing miracles of the city of Volterra. People made pilgrimages, families uprooted to move to the place God himself had so blessed. And it was all because they listened to the sound of my voice.

"Little by little I became sickened by the whole spectacle of it. The way the Volturi held themselves up in piety while the rest of us had to obey their every command. They were actually coming to believe their own mythos.

"I was nearing the end of my year, and Caius was trying to convince me that I must stay with them. I had learned that I was physically stronger than the older immortals. I also knew that what was done to me could not be undone. I was determined to be finished with Volterra and the Volturi, the minute my promise was fulfilled.

"That is when Caius held another carrot in front of me – Tessa. No, he did not get her and bring her to me, that would have been too much, but he told me he would show me how to make her like us. One of the laws the Volturi passed, was that newborns were not to be created without their permission, or by those they considered worthy. Caius promised me he would help me change the woman I loved if I would give them one more year. I agreed I would stay. However this time I was more familiar with their language and I conveniently forgot to make a promise or vow. Speech was my gift and I used it against them, knowing I would be bound if I gave an oath. Caius and I then traveled back to Greece."

He stops talking and I watch his face become a mask of bitterness and hatred. I know he's about to tell me his most painful memory; it's in the very air around him. I'm thankful for the partition between us, but still I'm drawn to him. I stand slowly and place my palm on the glass opposite him. He meets my eyes, placing his hand against mine on the other side. I can hear his teeth grinding in his anger, but slowly he relaxes. His shoulders slump and his head drops to his chest. He leans against the glass, supporting himself with his hand pressed against my palm. His head comes up slowly and he looks me in the eyes. I have never seen a more tortured look on any face, including my dad before he died.

"Things had changed at my home. I was unable to find my Tessa in her home and I was told she had married. Still I held out hope that the man she married could not possibly love her as much as I did. I knew she would never forget me or stop loving me and so I went to her. I knew the way well because my lovely Tessa had married my younger brother. I was only a little upset because it was a common practice at the time for a relative to marry a widow, or in Tessa's case a betrothed woman whose bride price had already been paid.

"I waited until the cover of darkness and stole into their home. I was able to take her out of her bed, away from my brother's arms without waking her, until the night air hit her. I ran with her cradled against me before she screamed. I took her to a quiet olive grove and placed her on a soft ground covering. It was my voice that helped to calm her and keep her quiet. My eyes were so much stronger than hers, and I could see her face as clearly as if it were daylight, but she struggled to see who I was. When I finally told her, she was shocked at first, but then overjoyed to know that I wasn't dead as she had been told. She poured out her heart to me; told me how she had grieved for me, and how she finally accepted to be married to my brother even though she did not love him.

"There was one piece of news I truly did not expect. She had born our son! We had lain together one time after our betrothal, and I never knew she'd conceived. The baby was named for me and he was four months old.

"There was precious little light by the half moon and the stars. My Tessa was glowing and beautiful and I listened to the beating of her heart as I pulled her against me. The plans in my head involved making her like me, then taking her away to live for the time it would take her to control her thirst. We could come back and retrieve our son later knowing that my family would care for him in our absence. As I held her I could sense a difference in her breathing and the sound of her heart. She was agitated, maybe frightened. She put her hand on my cold face and then touched my chest where my heart no longer beat.

It was at that time that Caius came out of the shadows holding a lantern. She went from being agitated to terrified, looking at his ghostly inhuman form. It took the strength of my voice to calm her and get her to listen to my explanation. Little by little I was able to convince her that we should be together and she could be just like me; strong and powerful enough to live forever. I had to use my power on her to convince her that we should leave the baby behind. She absolutely would not agree to it any other way.

"It took a couple hours for all the explanations and convincing. Caius remained passive except when she had questions only he could answer. As the sky began to brighten in advance of the sun she told me eagerly to make her like me. 'I love you Stefanos; I want to love you forever, I will be with you always!' She offered herself to me and I cradled her in my lap.

"I looked expectantly to Caius but he shook his head. 'No, it is best if you do it since she is to be your wife. All you need to do is bite her, and your venom will cause the change. Just don't take all of her blood or you will kill her.'

"I argued with him. I was already thirsting for her blood and his eyes were bright red from a recent feeding. But he again assured me that it was a simple matter and I should be the one to turn my own wife." Stefan looks at me, and no tears fall from his eyes. But still I sense that inside he is tortured beyond measure.

"I kissed her then, and she put her soft warm arms around me and relaxed in my embrace. I kissed her cheek, her chin, and down her neck until I could feel her very pulse beneath my lips. It was where Caius bit me the year before. The last thing I ever heard her say was 'I love you,' before I bit her. I often wonder if it was her willingness, but I know that even if she had fought me like a lioness, I was too weak to resist her blood. Caius watched until her heart was barely beating then he took hold of my arm and feebly pulled as if trying to pull me from her. My reaction was strong, as he knew it would be. I would defend against any who would steal my ….my prey...she was my kill!" I hear his voice choking on his words as he is barely able to speak. His voice fails him, and then his knees buckle and he slides down the wall to the floor, choking on the pain.

He kneels on the floor and I sit opposite him for a long time. If I could I would hold him. The wound is still fresh, raw, and deep, and he takes a long time before he can look at me again.

"In the light of the sunrise I was able to see the full horror of what I had done. My sweet, beautiful, Tessa was dead, still in my lap but with her throat torn out as if by a monster – it is a monster that killed her! I am not a god; I am a monster and I had the woman I loved more than anything in the world staring up at me, her eyes forever accusing me of what I had become!"

He looks at me with his beautiful eyes and it is heartbreaking to see the agony he still feels, even after all these years. "I cannot remember so much about her, but I can never forget my Tessa in death. She has earned her last desire; she is with me always." He looks at me and then stands. He walks to the door of my cell "Do you trust me?"

I nod my head. "You should not." He pulls out the key and unlocks the door. He is barely inside the door before I put my arms gently around him. He then hands me the key and I slip it into the pocket of his pants I'm wearing. "I have never shared her story...not like this. I cannot take this pain alone. I apologize, I am too weak." I lead him toward the bed so we can sit together, but instead he pulls me to the chair. He takes the seat then pulls me onto his lap.

I know that there is an attraction between us, but as we sit together all I feel is sadness for him. I put my arms around him and lay my head against his shoulder. I can still feel his ragged breaths, and I know he is reliving the moments of the story he's just told me. When he speaks I can feel his voice rumble through his chest and resonate in my own bones.

"I thought killing my precious Tessa was the worst thing that could happen to me. I dug a grave in the pretties part of the olive grove and buried her. I couldn't even cry for her; how is that for a god? I carved her marker out of stone with my own fingers. Caius was nowhere to be seen while I put to rest my love and my life." His arms come carefully around me and he momentarily buries his face against me. "I finally decided I needed to go back to my family's home and let them know what I had done, and what I had become.

"It was too quiet. The houses seemed to be empty as I approached and I caught the odor on a gust of wind. I ran, and my superhuman speed took me to the door before I had time to prepare for what I would find. They were all gone. I staggered from house to house as the bodies added up. My mother, father, four sisters, three brothers, five spouses, ten children...and one four month old son I had never had a chance to hold – all dead!"

He buries his head against me and I can feel his shock and horror at what he discovered. I can almost see them in my mind, lying on the stone floors as they went about their morning routines, or perhaps lying in their beds where they were sleeping. He doesn't have to tell me they were murdered, but I know he isn't finished.

I feel his breath against my ear as he continues softly. "I recognize the pattern; they have all been drained, it is the signature of the Volturi! Twenty-five family members, four servants, and my Tessa were all dead! I knew that no single creature could do what was done. Caius had help – lots of help. One household was killed in their beds, and the others were killed in the morning. Caius' eyes were glowing red the night before, because he had been feeding on part of my family! In the morning while I was burying my Tessa, they were at my home massacring everyone who tied me to my life as a man!"

I knew that I was going to hear a sad story, but the horror he tells is unimaginable. I can feel his pain is almost as fresh today as it was fifteen hundred years ago. He is proof that time alone does not heal all wounds.

It comes as a surprise when he touches my face. His stone cold fingers wipe away the tears that I didn't even realize were rolling down my cheeks. I can feel the waves of sadness and agony pouring off of him. I know it must be his influence that makes me feel it so strongly, but it's such a cleansing feeling as I bury my face against him and cry my eyes out over his lost love and family. Even more I know that I've tapped into the sadness of my own losses and heartbreaks as well. Once started I can't stop, as I cry over my mother leaving, my father dying, my grandmother's death, my feeling of always being alone in the world, and even Lucian. I cry over the futility of my situation as his captive, and I cry for my own certain death.

I don't know how long I weep but I become aware of his arms comfortingly around me. His hand strokes my head and his soft words try to console me. It is strangely as if our roles are reversed, and I am crying his tears and he is comforting me for them. I put my arms around him, and I want to curl against him and feel his comfort while the tears continue to trickle out of me. Every thought of loss, regret, betrayal, guilt, and despair are raked through in my mind. Like spreading the coals of a dying fire to douse them with water so they can finally go out. I water the memories with my tears until his shirt is wet from my eyes.