Trial by Fire
Chapter 8: Revelation
The room was crowded and the royal physician, Mr. Miyaki, glanced at Mai, sitting tensely on her bed, asking her silently if she wanted some of the people removed. The girl in question shook her head. She was all right with everyone there, well not her mother, really, but she would tolerate the woman's presence. Mai could see genuine concern on Akira's face along with that perpetual disappointment; her daughter was not what she had expected or wanted and this problem, this burn made everything so much more difficult.
Mai snickered and said inside her head, 'But you won't have to live with what's underneath the bandages, will you, mother? That pleasure is all mine.'
She glanced over at Zuko next and gripped the knife she held beneath the sheets even more tightly. The prince's gesture of compassion and kindness had carried her through the past few days and she found herself staring at the blade at the oddest times. He gave her an encouraging smile, one that said, 'I don't care what's beneath those bandages. I like you no matter what.' She smiled back and then looked to the physician. "I'm ready."
Her Uncle Katashi stood at the foot of the bed. He kept looking at her, his brown eyes full of strength and love. It was as if he were trying to impart some of his toughness onto her, simply by the power of his stare.
And Ty Lee, sweet Ty Lee, had her hands clasped and her grey eyes were already tear filled, whether in anticipation of something terrible or something good, Mai wasn't sure. The black haired girl almost felt as though she had to comfort her friend, so distraught looking was she.
"All right then, Mai, I'll remove these things and take a look. Then you can go into the bathroom and see for yourself. I can still kick everyone out if you like. It might get intense, dear. I've tried to prepare you as best I can, but seeing is different." He leaned in close for a moment and whispered, "Remember that you're strong and you have people who care no matter what. You'll be fine, Mai. I'm sure of it." He patted her shoulder and began to remove the white strips of cloth. Miyaki had developed quite an affection for Mai over the few weeks he had treated her and his respect for the girl was tremendous. He was rooting for her and no matter what she did or where she ended up, Miyaki planned on keeping in some sort of contact.
Mai was torn. The healer's words were comforting and gave her a surge of confidence. But at the same time, they implied that she would need to be very strong. That implication filled her with misgivings and a cold sort of terror. She closed her eyes while Miyaki worked. His hands were gentle and she could almost imagine they were caressing her rather than exposing some hideous mark for the world to see.
"Ready?" he asked. The physician's body was blocking everyone's view. Only he could see the mark now. "I can have someone get a mirror so you can look before everyone else does."
Mai thought for a moment and then refused quietly. The expressions of those here with her would be a better gauge of how disfiguring her scar really was. Practical as she could be, it was her face and her life and she could never look at either of them with complete neutrality.
The healer stood aside, keeping a hand firmly on Mai's shoulder as if in anticipation of her bolting from the room. Mai didn't bolt, though. She allowed her gaze to drift from one person to the next, examining each of their faces closely. Her Uncle Katashi gave her a smile before approaching the side of her bed and looking more closely at the scar. He was honest, almost brutally so, but his words still made the girl feel better.
"It's bad, Mai. I can't lie." He reached out and gently, a strange action for such a big, burly man, stroked the edge of the large mark. "You won't be able to hide it. But, you know what? You wear it well." Mai smiled and released the breath she had been holding. She let her own fingers touch the disfigurement. The skin felt puckered and thick in the centre, the area that had been most severely affected and the area where the hottest of Azula's fire had done its damage. Toward the outer edges where the girl's fire hadn't been quite so hot, the underlying tissue had not been harmed. The scarring was less severe, the skin softer and smoother. That was also the part that had hurt. The nerves had not been destroyed there so every movement of her face, every smile or frown had been excruciatingly painful. It still hurt a bit, but being young and strong, Mai had healed remarkably well. "That princess bitch," Katashi continued. "She…."
From across the room, his sister, Akira, gasped and put a hand to her mouth. "That sort of language is not appropriate and you can't call the princess that."
"I can and I will. She is a bitch. Look at what she did to your daughter! Come over here and look at Mai's face!" Katashi was livid with anger. He marched over to Akira, grabbed her by the shoulders and marched her back to Mai's bedside. "Does that princess really deserve to be treated with respect? Open your eyes, woman. It's time to wake up!"
Akira looked down at Mai and her eyes filled with tears. Nearby, Ty Lee began to cry as well. The tension in the room was too much for her gentle spirit to bear. Zuko hesitated and then, when she actually began to tremble, put his arm around the girl. She sniffed and gave her friend a grateful smile.
"Oh, Mai," Akira stated softly. The sympathy in the woman's voice made Mai take a second look at her mother. "I, I….." She didn't know what to say, but she put her hand atop Mai's. The girl was shocked. She couldn't recall the last time her mother had shown her any kind of genuine affection or worry. "We'll work things out somehow. Your father and I will see to it."
Instantly, Mai imagined her parents scouring the nation for someone, anyone willing to accept a betrothal to their disfigured and hideous daughter. The thought almost made her laugh. In fact, her lips did twitch a bit. "I look forward to that," she replied dryly. But Mai was moved by her mother's display. It had given rise to a tiny bit of hope, like a seed just beginning to sprout, in her heart. Perhaps, maybe, one day she could have some sort of relationship with her mother that consisted of more than silence or hurtful comments or sarcasm; perhaps.
"I know this whole situation is emotional, but let's keep the drama down to a minimum," Miyaki cautioned everyone. "I don't want Mai getting upset."
"I'm okay," Mai stated. She moved her hand, and Akira snatched her own back. "Zuko, Ty Lee, you may as well come have a look too. I already feel like a circus freak."
Ty Lee wiped at her eyes and got up from her seat. Her steps were halting and unsure. Clenching her fists at her sides, she forced herself to move more purposefully. Mai might think she was afraid to look at the scar and Ty Lee did not want to give her friend any more stress or discomfort. Azula had done enough of that to last Mai's entire lifetime.
The acrobat tried not to flinch. She tried so hard. But when her eyes rested on the left side of Mai's face, the action came involuntarily. It was ugly, red and rough looking, and impossible not to notice. Most of that one side of Mai's face had been consumed by the scar. "I'm sorry," Ty Lee murmured. "It's, it's…I mean, it's shocking," was the best the girl could manage. "But, I'll get used to it."
"I'm the one who has to get used to it, Ty Lee," Mai retorted tartly. "You can leave here today. This," she pointed to her face, "is staying here with me."
"Oh, Agni, I know. I'm sorry. I feel so stupid now." She sat on the bed beside her best friend and began to cry once more.
Mai rolled her eyes and patted the girl's back awkwardly. "You don't have to cry, Ty Lee. Look, please don't. It's okay. I'll be okay." She wanted to say more, say how grateful she was to both Ty Lee and Zuko for visiting her every day without fail, for sticking by her like real friends should. If nothing else, at least she knew she had an uncle who loved her and two friends who cared, maybe even loved her too. That was something, probably more than a lot of people had. The thought made her feel good inside, like she could truly face what was ahead of her over the next few months and years. Yes, maybe everything really would be all right.
Zuko stood by, shifting from one foot to the other. What he really wanted was for everyone to leave so that he could talk with Mai alone. There was no way he was going to get all mushy and emotional in front of all those people. Mai was an exception. He could tell her anything and right now he wanted to tell the girl how he felt about her.
Thank Agni, Miyaki saw his plight and made up some story about Mai getting stressed and fatigued from all the people and their heightened emotional states. "Shoo," he ordered, pushing Akira and Katashi and Ty Lee from the room. "Prince Zuko hasn't had a chance to say anything yet. He can stay for a few minutes." Looking pointedly at the young man over his spectacles, the healer left next, closing the door softly behind him.
Mai's first instinct was to hide her face somehow. She slid down a bit in her bed and the mound of pillows partially covered her bad side. Next she tilted her head, giving Zuko a good view of her unscarred right side. He stared at her curiously, eyebrows drawn together. "Oh, forget it," Mai huffed. "It's not like I can hide it from you forever." Bravely, she sat up tall in her bed and looked directly at the prince. "Well, what do you think?"
Zuko chewed on his lip and examined her closely. "I think that it's a bad scar, Mai. And I think that I want to kill Azula for hurting you. But, I also think," he began to blush, contemplating his next words, "that you're really pretty," he looked down at his hands, his face almost purple now, "and nothing could change that and I like you, Mai, a lot." He let out a relieved breath and slowly raised his head to meet Mai's eyes.
For the second time, Zuko had moved her to tears. Mai was too overcome to say anything.
"Agni, Mai, I'm sorry. Do you not want me to like you? Did I say something wrong?"
"No," she finally managed to mutter. "Idiot, you said everything right." She wanted to say, 'And I like you too,' but couldn't form the words. She reached out for Zuko's hand, though, and he took it willingly. They stayed like that for a bit before Mai asked him a favor. "Will you come with me while I look at my face? "
He nodded and helped Mai out of bed. She put on her slippers and together they padded to the bathroom, Mai still holding on tight to Zuko's hand.
"I'm scared," she said softly. Her eyes were closed. She couldn't bring herself yet to look in the glass.
"I would be too," Zuko answered. He gave her hand a soothing rub and once again that seething hatred for Azula and his father roared through his body. He shuddered with repressed anger. "You have to do it, Mai."
The eleven year old smiled ruefully. "I know." And then she opened her eyes and simply stared. There were no words, nothing she could say that would adequately express the rage and sorrow that she felt. She shook uncontrollably and withdrew her hand from Zuko's, reaching up to touch the mass of red and pink that covered most the left side of her face. It wasn't bad, it was horrific. How could Zuko say that she was pretty? How could he possibly like her? Maybe it was simply pity that he was stupid enough to mistake for something else. Maybe his feelings were temporary and once he had looked at that scar a few times, he would want nothing more to do with her.
Zuko said nothing, but his warm hand was on Mai's arm now. He stood there stoically, waiting to see if she needed him for anything. How could he be so decent when Azula was such a monster? Why was the world and the people in it, such a stupid, confounding place? Maybe she would never understand.
"Are you okay?" the prince asked after a silence that seemed to go on forever.
"Great," Mai rasped. "I'm just great. So, do you think my mother will be able to find a husband for me? There might be a bidding war. Who wouldn't want to look at this face every day?"
"She doesn't need to." Zuko sought out Mai's pretty gold eyes and looked into their depths.
Narrowing those gold eyes, Mai contemplated her friend's words. "Do you mean…?"
"Yeah," Zuko replied firmly and gave her his brightest smile.
A/N: Zuko's not proposing per se. He's only 12 after all. I guess that he's promising to be there for Mai now and in the future. He's trying to save her from what they know will be a terrible fate. He wants to be the one she depends on.
I have some interesting plans for Mai and Zuko that Iroh will play a big part in.
Ix, thanks for reading bits for me. :) I appreciate it.