Thanks to everyone who's reviewed. This chapter has a flashback which is written in italics.
Like any other day Roger was shut in the Loft strumming away at his guitar. Unusually though it wasn't a song that was giving him trouble, but the puzzle of what to buy Collins for Christmas. What did you buy for someone who had a different view of reality?
"Actual reality. Act up. Fight Aids!" Roger sang to himself as he thought.
If it had been anyone else he could have thought of something to buy, but the problem with Collins was that he didn't follow any of the rules.
"The anarchist will never do what he's told. Unless it's a request by a certain drag queen with style. Then he'll turn into putty in her hands. He's always been one to melt at a sunshine smile." Roger summed up his friend's character, but it didn't help him to decide. Sure there were things he could buy:
"A bottle of Stoli, a box of Captain Crunch, some dope to smoke or a brand new coat. A knitted beanie, a checked shirt, some meatless meatballs or a philosophy book." He listed to himself. "But none of these really show I care."
That was the problem Roger realised. Collins had been such a good friend to him. Someone he could talk to when he was going through a bad patch with Mimi. When Mimi wouldn't speak to him she would talk to Angel, who would tell Collins who would relate it back to Roger. Collins also knew the right things to say when Roger was in an angsty mood about April or having AIDS. Whatever happened he knew Collins' laid back attitude would cheer him up. That's why he didn't just want to buy a present for the sake of it. He wanted to show how much he liked Collins.
He was reminded of when Collins had come out to him.
Roger knew something was up by the way Collins was fidgeting nervously. He felt like Collins had been avoiding him for some time and today he had requested that they meet up as he needed to tell him something important.
"What's wrong?" Roger asked concerned.
"I've got something to tell you." He replied apprehensively. "I'm gay."
"Okay." Roger replied wondering what Collins was working up to. Yet he had stopped speaking and seemed to be trying to judge Roger's reaction. "And…" Roger prompted.
"That's it." Collins was confused. Did Roger not understand? "I'm gay" he repeated. "I like guys."
"That's all?" Roger questioned astonished. "Why were you worried about telling me that? What did you think I was going to do? Did you think I wouldn't accept you?"
Roger had been angry and hurt that someone he considered one of his closest friends could not trust him enough to come out straight away, but had expected Roger to despise him for who he was. Yet when they talked more his anger faded away. It turned out nearly everyone Collins knew had turned against him. His parents disowned him, his employer sacked him and his first boyfriend had left him after giving him AIDS. He could understand Collins' difficulty to trust people. Therefore he wanted to give Collins a present that would show how much he valued their friendship.
"True to his friends and true to himself. Always calm and always cool. As suave as Bond, James Bond is Collins, Tom Collins." Roger sang as he reflected on all Collins' good qualities. "If anyone needs help you know he'll be there. He'll cheer you when you're down, calm you when you're mad. He's someone you know you always can trust- unless it's to catch the keys you've thrown down."
After thinking for a while longer Roger realised the words he had been singing to himself formed the basis of a song about Collins; he knew it was a habit of his to sing great songs without even realising it. Quickly Roger got some paper and started to write it down, deciding to do a slightly country tune that was as laid-back as his friend. Once he had finished he wrote the song up neatly and wrapped it around a bottle of Stoli. He couldn't wait to give Collins his present.
Haven't done any Roger/ Collins before so i'd love to get some reviews on it please.