6.

No I didn't want to relive this. I knew what was going to happen and my breath stopped. My lungs couldn't take in any air as I watched.

His eyes widened in fear as he realized what was going to happen. The rain made a fuzzy barrier of water between us. He was going to do it! I cried out, begging him to stop, but it was too late. He couldn't stop now if he wanted to.

I didn't want to see this. I had suffered it through it once, please God don't make do it again. I couldn't see it…

"No!" I shouted as I sat on the bed. My heart sped and everything became hazy as the tears filled my eyes. My heart was racing a mile a minute and I laid back down. Sudden relief filled my body. I closed me eyes but images of that faithful day seemed to fill my head.

I felt sick and the nausea was so much that it forced me out of the bedroom and in the bathroom. I threw up again. My stomach heaved over and over. I sat still my breaths coming short and quick before I gained the strength to clean myself up.

Suddenly I felt warmth everywhere around me. I closed my eyes and leaned on the sink for strength.

"Why do you come back?" I finally asked. It was a question that had seemed to always follow me. I was always afraid to ask it afraid he would leave and stop the enjoyable pain.

"Because of you," he whispered.

"What about me?"

"Just you, I think. You're too unwilling to let go. I told you once, I can never leave you. Ever. It's a package deal of love," he said nonchalantly.

"Death isn't part of it," I growled and just like that I no longer felt him. I upset him, but he'd be back he always was. He was the only thing that kept me going, he would always be.

I took a deep breath and held back the tears. I refused to cry. I stood up and got ready for work, hoping to avoid this day for as long as possible.

I had been working a Billy's for a month now. When I started he was great. He introduced me to everyone and showed me around. He told me how things went and set me to work on the soups. Billy's place wasn't exactly the fanciest place, but it was a major step up then just a diner.

Everyone welcomed me and I felt a bit at home. I loved cooking and as time passed I found I could lose all my emotions if I concentrated hard enough on the food. It didn't take long for Billy to notice my best was in pastries and soon I was making all kinds of different desserts.

Though my emotions were usually lost when I cooked, I couldn't hide them today. Today cooking just brought on more sorrow and grief and bitter sweet memories.

The day passed much too quickly for me. I didn't want to go home and face the emptiness of the house. Not today.

Put as I made my slow steps to my car a voice stopped me.

"Bella!" I turned and a smile spread over my face.

"Jacob!" I said and he made his way toward me. He held out his arms and I gladly went into them, like I always had before. He squeezed me tight and I enjoyed the sweetness of him. His warmth and comfort. I sunk in it.

I had always had Jacob as a friend, granted we didn't start getting close till I started high school I had given him my trust from day one. That wasn't something I could do easily, but Jake had yet to show me he didn't deserve it.

I hadn't seen him in almost a year and even though I had been working for his father for over a month this was my first time seeing him.

I pulled away after only a few seconds and looked at him. He wasn't much different since the last time I had seen him. His hair a little shorter but he was still the same.

"Bells, how you doing?" he said with his eyes light. He had no look of pity in them but I knew what he meant by the question. I knew what he was referring too.

"As good as I can be, I guess," I answered and he smiled.

"It's been a while, eh?"

"Sure has," I said and he laughed as he ran a hand through his hair.

"I'm sorry I lost touch with you for so long. But that day I seen you and it's just I didn't think…" he trailed off at that not finishing his sentence but I shook my head.

"No, it's alright. I don't think I would have been up for a visit a while ago," I said slowly knowing what he was talking about.

"So how come your not with Lizzy?" I asked.

"Ah, Lizzy and I are no more," he said and my smile dropped.

"I'm sorry to hear that," I said and he shrugged.

"What are you up to?" he asked and I looked at my feet. I moved them around making little circles in the snow.

"I have no idea," I said softly with voice full of raw emotion.

"Need a friend?" he asked in a soft voice and I looked up to his eyes. They were full of understanding and sadness. Jacob didn't understand how it was like either, but he had his fair share of heart break in his life as well.

"Yea, I really could," I said finding the words truer than I thought they were. He followed me to my car and drove me home.

He asked how I was holding up, and I told him it was hard. He asked if this was me at my best and I told him it pretty much was. He asked if I hurt and I told him I did.

I told him it was hard to get over it and I couldn't be expected to just let go. He nodded in silent agreement.

When we arrived at the house he followed me inside.

He walked into the living room and let out a low whistle.

I turned.

"What?"

"Well, I mean no offense but no wonder it's hard for you to move on. I don't expect you to get over him, because honestly you can't, but walking into this room…it's depressing," he said and I stared confused at him.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, Bella, look. You have pictures of him and you everywhere. I mean it was like this before too, but it's okay to take some down now, it's okay to change," he said and I stared at the room.

He was right. I had pictures of him on the wall and on the coffee table. But it had always been like this. We always had pictures of us, and I couldn't bare change them.

"Maybe, that's your problem. You need to change how you lived before, into how you live now," he said and my eyes watered as I stared at him.

I looked around the room once more.

I still had every picture he hung up and we had taken together up. I still had everything the way it was before. I hated change, but maybe that was why it was so hard.

"Maybe you're right," I said.

.

.

.

I know without a doubt that I am completely and totally head over heels in love with Edward Cullen. I know with out a doubt that I will become his wife someday. Every day I spend with him makes me happy. Everything we do together makes me laugh.

Edward helped me find out I loved cooking and baking and I helped him find out he loved medical science. With all the falling I did he was always there to patch me up. With all the cooking we did I found it made me happy and I am good at it.

3 years has gone by and after the first year I have stopped waiting for that feeling to go away. The love and adoration it was always there. We have fights and arguments and sometimes I hate him, but love and hate are a thin line and it's hard to try and find where one begins and the other ends.

So now we stood in my kitchen.

"I can't bake," he says and I roll my eyes.

"You don't try" I argue and he laughs.

"Yes, I do! I just can't bake!" he retorts and I glare.

"Then why did you ask me to teach you?!" I snap! This is not how I want to spend Valentine's Day. Edward has always planned something special, not extreme and overly expensive, but sweet surprising things that made my heart leap and fall in love with him a little more and made Valentine's Day my favorite holiday.

"I wanted to bake! Maybe your just a bad teacher!" he say back his green eyes flashing with…humor. The comment hurt, but I push it aside with my annoyance. What is funny about this?! Frustrated I grab a bit of flour and throw it at him. He flinches and I burst into laughter. His nose and cheeks are a dusty white and when he opens his eyes I see the seriousness in them.

This confuses me before he grabs a bit of flower in his fingers and throws it at me.

The soft powder hits my cheek I gasp. I throw another bunch of flour at him and he throws them back. In the end, I am pushed against a wall while Edward attacks my lips with his. We are both covered in white flour.

"Happy Valentine's day," he whispers as he kisses down my throat sending the never ending fire in my veins. "Mmm," I hum my brain not making sense of his words.

He pulls away and I whimper in protest.

"We have to clean," he says and I growl. "We can do it later," I argue as I pull him back. He gives me a soft peck and becomes free from my hold.

"No, Charlie will be here in a few minutes and I want him to say yes, when I ask if I can have you for the evening," he says with a glitter in his eye.

"Where are we going?" I ask thrill forming.

"My secret, now lets clean," he says. I sigh, but we continued to clean the kitchen.

"Where are we going?" I ask a little impatient. He holds my hand as we walk to along a little trail in a small park. I have come to this park before, but I couldn't imagine why we were here. The snow glitters in the dying sun and everything seems to be tinted orange in the sunset.

"Just a little further," he says.

The sky is darkening and turning purple but the sun clings to the earth not ready to succumb to nightfall. We finally reach a small bench and he sits me down. He sits down next to me and smiles, making his face look angelic.

"You may not know this, but this was the place I first saw you," he says.

I smile. "Really?"

"You were sitting on this very bench reading Shakespeare, and I couldn't help how amazingly strange I thought you were. I wanted to know more about you, everything from your past to future, to things you hate to things you love. This is where I fell in love with you."

He opens the small book bag he has brought with him and pulls out a container. He lifts the lid and takes out a cupcake.

"I was lying, you're a great teacher," he says as he holds it out to me.

It was a chocolate cupcake and completely plain, what decorated the top of the cup cake took my breath away and formed tears in my eyes.

Lying in the middle of the cupcake was a ring. It was simple and elegant. The band caresses tiny emeralds that match his eye color. The diamond stands in the middle and rises proudly. The gold held it high and it shined in the little light that was left from the sun.

I stare at it for what seems like forever and finally raise my head to meet his. His eyes are staring at me with nothing more than love.

I can't speak.

So he does.

"Bella, I love you. This doesn't mean we have to go to Vegas and get hitched. I just want everyone to know that you belong to me, now and forever. You can say no, but before you do know that this ring will get on your finger someday," he says with a smirk.

"I won't give you up. Ever. You are my life," he says simply and takes the ring from the cup cake as he lowers himself onto one knee and by this time, the tears have leaked down my cheek.

"Will you marry me?" he asks.

I stare at the ring and then his eyes. There really is only one answer.

It doesn't matter that I'm still a senior and that were still young. It doesn't matter that I have yet to leave the house and that Edward hasn't gone to college because he's waiting for me.

It doesn't matter what our parents will say and it doesn't matter how we would turn out. It doesn't matter that this seems unreal and it wouldn't probably last. It only matters that I love him, and he loves me.

So I say the only answer that is possible.

"Yes," I whisper and he laughs as his gentle smooth fingers slip the ring on my third finger.

"A promise of forever," he says looking at me with his dark eyes a smile playing at his lips. His face lit with happiness and his eyes twinkled. He stands up and lays a simple and sweet kiss on my lips.

"I'm holding you to that," I whisper and he caresses my face as he continues to leave soft kisses on it.

.

.

.

The snow crunched underneath my feet as I made my way to him.

I hadn't visited him in such a long time. I didn't feel the need, he was always with me, but something told me that I had to. Covered in my parka and wearing gloves and scarf I made my way to him.

R.I.P

Edward Anthony Cullen
A loving son, brother, husband, and friend.
He will never be forgotten
June 20, 1986 – July 12, 2008

I brushed off the snow from his tombstone and took a seat on the cold hard ground sinking into the snow.

"Hey," I whispered letting my breath form a cloud of white.

I read the words on his tombstone, studying the indention of the words.

"I put away some pictures today. Not all of them, but most. I rearranged the living room too. Jacob helped. He misses you too. Packed away most of your things, but kept the important ones," I told him. I smiled and took out the plastic container. Inside held a plain chocolate cupcake.

"I didn't think this should stop. It's our tradition to eat a cupcake on Valentine's Day." I laid the container on the floor next to me.

I took a deep breath.

"I wanted to tell you, I'm angry at you. I hadn't ever told you, but it's time. You hurt me, and I feel like it's my fault. I'm angry at you and at me and I'm so angry that I ever met you. Because if you hadn't ever met me you wouldn't be here and we would both probably feel empty but that would be so much better than this," I said trying to tell him everything I had ever kept inside me.

"I've been remembering that day. Seven years ago, today. I remember that promise of forever and you broke it. I want to be so mad at you! I want to hate you but I can't because I love you too much. I feel so alone," I whispered tears falling down my cheek and hitting the snow.

"I'm sorry," I heard his voice. I looked up and I could see him. Barely there but it was more of a sight than I ever had before

The sunset making him looking golden and beautiful. I dropped my head again and let the tears fall down my cheeks, I couldn't look at him. He sat next to me, unmoving and silent.

I wiped away the tears with my snow covered gloves and sat a little straighter.

"I came here to do something," I whispered and removed my left glove. I stared at the ring he had given me and felt my broken heart quake. Slowly I slid it off my finger. "I'm not ready to get rid of it just yet, but I can't wear like this anymore," I told him and removed my other glove as I took out a gold chain from my pocket.

I slid the ring on the chain and latched it on my neck holding it for a few minutes.

It was silent but I could feel him. I didn't dare look at him again. I stood from the snow and brushed it off my knees. I brushed his tombstone once more and listened to the sounds around me as I let my hand rest on his stone. It felt lighter and empty with out the ring.

I hadn't ever taken off that ring. But the ring was a symbol of a promise and it was worn in a symbol of a promise and the promise had been broken. So now the ring hung around my neck. A symbol of change.

I lifted my hands from his stone and covered them again and turned away.

"Happy Valentine's Day, Edward," I breathed before walking away. Each step hurting more and more.

Wow this was a hard chapter; I had to put the right emotion in it, so I hope I got it right. Anyway I hope you review for me it makes me feel happy! And I really need a pick me up after writing a chapter like this :'(.

Anyway I know everyone is wondering how Edward died and well you will know, but you'll find out later in the story. Oh and this will not be a BellaXJacob or BellaXOcharacter.

Anyway thanks for all the amazing reviewers out there and I hope I have the honor of hearing from you again!!!!

Truly Twilightholic-Tanya