A/N: I am soooo sooo sooo soooooooo sorry this took so long! I've been writing about a thousand different things at once. .
cherry blossom infiltration
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It ended up being that I left the art room first, the art twins still squabbling when I left.
Tch. Idiots.
Anyway, my posters in hand, I strolled down the halls, eyeing potential places to hang my masterpieces during the night.
Of course, first I had to find my sidekicks.
"Don't you ever dare DISS THE SQUIRRELS again!"
I whipped around, darting down a hallway I had previously ignored and ended up in one of Konoha Directions' many courtyards, where Sia was in a staredown with a freshman.
The freshie was losing.
"Sia," I called, trying to get her attention. "I need your help."
"Saku-kun!" She chirped, icing the freshmeat as she galloped-yes, GALLOPED-over to me. "What can I do for you chickadee?"
"Okay...one, don't ever call me that again, two, chickadee? Wtf? And three, I need you to help me put these up tonight." I waved the anti-Hidan posters in her face.
A cackle emerged from her lips as she rubbed her hands together, grinning maniacally. "Oh, I can manage that my little squirrel minion. I can manage that."
"Just...meet at Courtyard A at eleven pm."
She started to laugh hysterically and I backed away.
Whyyyyy was she my friend again...?
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Knocking on the door in front of me impatiently, I propped my free hand on my hip. "Tennie! Cmon! I know you're in there!"
The door flung open, nearly smacking me in the face. "OW! Mother of Jashin-" I broke off, holding my nose to make sure it wasn't broken.
"OH, shit, I'm sorry Sak!" Tenten apologized, a look of guilt on her face. "Do you need-"
"Give me a sec," I managed, slowly letting go of my nose. "Fuuuuck that hurt."
The brunette offered me a sheepish smile. "So, uhm, bruised and injured noses aside, what's up?"
"I need your help," I muttered, rubbing my fingers up and down the bridge of my nose gently. "Tonight, Courtyard A, 11 pm. By the way, I'm so killing you." And with that, I turned around and walked down the hallway.
"I'm sorry...!"
"LIES!"
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"About time you guys got here!" Sia whined as Tenten and I arrived at exactly the same moment.
"Shut yer trap, hoe," Tenten said in a fake accent. "...No judging!" She whined as Sia and I just stared at her.
"Riiiiiiiiight..." I said slowly. "Well, as you know, Ino has completely ruined my life by daring me to piss off/infiltrate the Akatsuki. So! Since you two are my partners in crime, you're going to help me hang up these badass posters I made earlier during break." I shoved a bunch of the 'Operation: Piss off Hidan' posters in Tenten and Sia's arms.
"Jashin can suck it? Jashin-sama will reap your soul? Jashin is not real bitch?" The brunette look at me.
"No, you have to read it correctly," Sia sighed. "It says JASHIN IS NOT REAL, BITCH!"
"Whatever squirrel-chan."
"Stop complaining you two and go hang them up!" I snapped.
"Yes ma'am!" Sia scurried off into the night, Tenten relctantly following.
I rubbed my nose. "Damn weapon lovers..."
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Sneaking around hanging up my Anti-Hidan and Jashin posters was fun. It made me feel like a ninja.
...I so wanted to be a ninja. Ninjas were awesome.
"Captain Haruno, the mission has been completed!" Sia appeared next to me, saluting.
"Shut up," Tenten appeared, smacking her over the back of the head. "C'mon, let's go to bed. Night Sak."
"Later guys," I waved, wondering how Ino and Hinata would feel about being awakened at midnight. Ah, well.
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The next day, the entire school was buzzing.
"Did you see them?"
"Not in person, no, Tsunade had the teachers take them down before I had a chance. But there are pictures on the web!"
"SERIOUSLY? Send me the link dude!"
I half-smiled. Whether in hallways or classrooms, everyone had been talking about the posters, which had been nicknamed the 'Anti-Hidan Documents' by some senior during third period. It was enough to make me want to dance through the hallways and yell "NOT INVISIBLE ANYMORE, AM I BITCH?" Somehow I refrained from doing so.
Sia, on the other hand, was a different story. I caught her piroutting through the halls like a ballerina in between third and fourth.
"Hey, pinky," A familiar voice said and I had to squash down my victorious feelings as I turned around slowly.
"Hello Hidan," I managed to subtly smirk. "Seems you're the man of the hour, no? I'm honoured you stopped to talk to me."
"Pile the fucking sarcasm on a little damn higher, pinky, then you might be fucking drowning in it," The junior retorted. I was acutely aware that we had a growing audience and that people were whispering about us.
"Why would I want to do that?" I answered sweetly. "If I did that I wouldn't be able to see all of my peers' wonderful faces everyday!"
The silver-haired male stuck his hands in his pockets. "Ya fucking know, I saw one of your kamidamned little friends last night, fucking scuttling around with a shitting handful of fucking yellow papers last night. I fucking think it was Itachi's fucking sister; Sia, right?"
"Oh, those," I laughed. "It's a prank going on between the six of us," I smiled brightly. "You wouldn't understand, your brain's too small to comprehend it."
The crowd around us hushed.
Hidan smirked. "Better fucking watch out, Sakura Haruno. The Akatsuki's gotta a fucking eye on you." And with that he turned around and walked through the parted crowd.
It was all I could do to keep a smirk off my face. Phase One, get their interest? Complete.
Now it was time to go brag, I thought as I turned around to walk off too, not bothering to hide my smirk as I spotted a poster Tsunade had missed.
ALL HAIL JASHIN...OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT?
Something like that, indeed.
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"I'm being watched!" I yelled proudly as I burst into Ino and Sia's dorm room. Said two females, along with Tenten, Temari, and Hinata, all turned to look at me like I was on something.
"...Do we need to call the Stalker Helpline, forehead?" The blonde of the group said slowly. I glared at her.
"Not like that you imbecile of a boar," I snapped. "I mean, the Akatsuki is now officially keeping tabs on me. I have begun my quest! It all really starts...from here."
"One of these days being friends with you is going to get me in a shit load of trouble," Temari muttered.
"Yeah, well, ditto," I snapped.
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The next week, I made it my goal to piss off the entirety of the Akatsuki in the ways that mattered-the small things.
Among numerous other things:
I told Itachi he looked like a girl and invited him to attend a girls only sleepover which, sadly, he rejected (Sia and I were so looking forward to braiding his hair).
I asked Kisame if he was related to Nemo or Bruce the shark.
Everytime I saw Zetsu in the halls, I would walk over to him, poke him, then casually announce to the entire hallway in a loud voice that he was 'still human'.
I replaced Deidara's wet clay with super glue.
I snuck into the juniors' art room and put all of Sasori's puppets into dresses and other frilly doll costumes.
I stole Kakuzu's wallet and replaced all of his cash with play money, snuck it back into his locker, and then put the actual cash in Hidan's locker.
I stole Hidan's locker rosary and placed it in Kakuzu's locker.
I replaced Konan's origami paper with cardboard.
I stuck a note to Tobi's locker that read SANTA ISNT REAL.
I didn't do anything to piss off Pein because my goal was to get inside the Akatsuki...not to get murdered.
And, just like the Anti-Hidan Documents, my acts of annoying the hell out of the Akatsuki had the entire school talking about the mysterious person with a grudge against the gang.
It seemed that, though the Akatsuki knew I was the one attempting to irritate the hell out of them (I mean, how could they not? I was surprised the rest of the school hadn't figured it out; I basically broadcast my actions to the entire world), they were waiting for a moment to strike.
I knew that I was in the calm before the storm, and soon I'd have ten Akatsukis after my ass wanting to know if I had a death wish.
Until then, I could only wait.
...And replace Tobi's lollipops with cardboard cutouts.
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A/N: And so the second chapter ends. I promise, hopefully by next chapter we will have an Akatsuki/Sakura confrontation. -rubs hands together eagerly-
Thank you to my reviewers: Ketsuki no Kuki, Purple Sunshine56, LivingInSymphony, xXFallenxBeautyxX, Dak Hamee, xXxMusicNCookiesxXx, ers110196. Every review makes me happeh as a Clam(pearl)...sorry I had to make that reference.
Again, I'm so sorry this chapter took about a month to write, I had major writer's block for the Sakura/Hidan conversation scene, but I pulled through!...still a little short but hopefully with the entire Akatsuki in the picture by next chapter it will get longer.
Ketsuki no Kuki asked for MadaSaku and I said I would leave that up to the readers: So tell me if you want the lovely Madara to appear in this story.
Also, on my profile there's a poll for which Akatsuki member Sakura should end up with at the end of CBI, so go and vote vote vote! Pretty please?
And one more thing: I need ideas of ways Sakura could piss off individual Akatsukis. Just because there's a big confrontation coming up soon doesn't mean Saku-chan is going to stop trying to annoy them.
REVIEW MY LOVELIES~. Reviews help keep the smexy Akatsuki males alive ;D.
~Ze RAWR