Hey there! Okay, so thanks for the reviews, and I wanted to get this out as soon as possible! Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I do not own glee or any of its characters. :(
-2 weeks later-
I let out a nervous, shaky sigh. I was walking into Rachel's funeral. I arranged the whole thing, with some help from Quinn. We decided to have all the guests wear some sort of gold, to represent Rachel's love of gold stars, and that it would be a musical funeral, with Rachel's favorite songs. I asked Quinn and my step-brother Kurt to sing at her funeral, and me too of course.
Suddenly it was time to make the speech. I stood up and went to the podium. I was never good at making speeches. The last time I made a speech was at mine and Rachel's wedding, and that was 5 years ago. I looked at all of the people in the audience; Mine and Rachel's old high school friends from Glee Club, her family, and my family. Then I looked at Quinn. She gave me an encouraging smile, and I felt a lot better.
I started:
"Hello, and thank you all for coming. It means so much to me, and I'm sure it means so much to Rachel as well. I'd known Rachel all my life. She was my best friend, the love of my life. When she passed away, I was in a slump that was so hard to get out of. But then, I learned that even though your loved one isn't here with you, they'll always be with you.
"Today is not a day to be mourning the time we didn't get to spend with her. We all know that is not what Rachel would have wanted. Today we should be celebrating the time we DID get to spend with her. All of us have memories with Rachel. Let's keep those memories alive by remembering her today."
I paused to let everyone think.
"Rachel might be gone, but she will never fully leave us. She'll always be with us, right in here."
I put my hand on my heart, just as Rachel had done the two times we parted.
"She lives on in our hearts, in our memories.
"We all know Rachel's love and passion for music, so I figured what better way to celebrate her than through that. Me, and two of Rachel's closest friends have arranged pieces to share with you today."
I motioned for Quinn to come up. She nervously stepped forward.
"Hello, everyone." She started. "The last time I talked to Rachel we were listening to a song. She told me that if she ever died young, to sing this song personally at her funeral. So here I am keeping that promise I made so long ago."
She sang If I Die Young, by The Band Perry, and did a beautiful job. Next I motioned to Kurt, and he confidently came up.
"Ladies and Gentleman, Rachel Berry changed my life. When I first met her I knew she would have a big impact in my life, although I didn't know if it would be for better or for worse. It is clear to me now that she has indeed changed my life for the better." Kurt paused, and looked up at the sky. "Rachel, this is for you."
Kurt sang the solo version of For Good, from the musical Wicked. By the end he had tears in his eyes as he walked back over to his seat.
Finally, it was my turn. I went back up to the podium. "Rachel was the rock in my life. When I felt I had no way out, and I was ready to give up, she was always there." Although no one knew what I was talking about, I knew that Rachel was listening. And this was for her. "She saved me in every way possible. I love her for that."
Then I started to sing, and suddenly I envisioned everyone gone, and Rachel was standing there. I knew that I was singing to her, and only her.
"There were nights where I was sure
I wouldn't see the morning sun
And there were days that seemed so dark
I couldn't wait for night to come
I couldn't stand to think about how
My life used to be
And how without a single warning
It all slipped away from me
Like a fool I thought I could fight
The shadows on my own
To the dark I was no stranger
But this was stronger than I'd known
And by the time I knew that I was in too deep I'd gone too far
And the light that used to guide me
Had faded from my heart
And I found myself in places I thought I'd never go
Surrounded by strangers I was so far from home
And I don't know how you found me
All I know is I owe everything to you
Yes I do
And I thank you for my heart
I thank you for my life
And I thank god for grace and mercy
And that you became my wife
I'm seeing for the first time
The stars, the sun and moon
But they've got nothing on the power
Of this love I have for you
And I thank you, I thank you
Now people say they'll stand beside you
They swear they never leave
When the rain started falling
You know it only fell on me
And it was hard to keep believing in myself
When all I felt was so much pain and guilt and shame
I couldn't even ask for help
I don't know if I believe in other lives
But when you came
There was something so familar
About the way you said my name
And the whole world started turning
And I swear that I'd been born again brand new
And it's all because of you
And so I thank you for my heart
I thank you for my life
And I thank god for grace and mercy
And that you became my wife
I'm seeing for the first time
The stars, the sun and moon
But they've got nothing on the power
Of this love I have for you
And I thank you
Oh, yeah
And I've seen so many things
That I just can't explain
But the miracle of miracles is how
With your love I was saved
And I thank you
I thank you for my life
And I thank god for grace and mercy
And that you became my wife
And I'm seeing for the first time
The stars, the sun and moon
But they've got nothing on the power
Of all this love I give to you
And I thank you for my heart
I thank you for my life
I thank god for grace and mercy
And that you became my wife
The day I started breathing
Was the day you took my hand
And until the day I die
Baby
I'll forever be your man
And I thank you, I thank you
Oh yes I do
Oh don't you know I thank you"
When I ended the song I felt the tears falling, but it didn't even matter. I know I'm supposed to be sad, but I couldn't help but feel proud for the wife I had, as I realized just how much she did for me.
-Later outside the Funeral home-
It was dark outside now. I was sitting the lake by the Funeral Home when Quinn came up to me. She sat down next to me and put her head on my shoulder.
"How you feeling?" She asked.
I sighed, resting my head on top of hers. "I feel at peace." I told her. "Since her death I've been selfish. I've only thought of myself, feeling sorry for myself, and not okay with the truth. But I needed this funeral. It's closure to what really happened. And I'm okay with it. I miss her, Quinn. I miss her like hell, but I know I'll be okay."
She looked at me, bewildered. Then she broke into a grin. "When did you become such a self-sufficient man?" She said jokingly.
I laughed, but under my breath I muttered, "Two weeks ago," remembering when she left. Luckily, Quinn didn't hear me.
There was a silence. Not an awkward, uncomfortable silence, but a nice, peaceful silence. We looked up at the stars.
Quinn lightly hit my arm. "Look at that star. It's gold. It's almost like it's shining there just for Rachel."
I looked. Just by looking at it, I could tell that it was more than a star. It really was Rachel. She was up there, looking out for me, like she said she would. I smiled. "Yeah, a gold star, just for Rachel."
We stayed like that a little longer, but then she said, "I've got to go. During the funeral, I sat next to Sam Evans, he asked me to dinner tonight!"
I chuckled. I knew that they would find their way back to each other, one way or another. "Okay, see you Quinn."
She started to leave, but then looked back. "Are you sure?" She asked. "I don't want you to feel like I'm leaving you. I can stay. There will be other nights to go to dinner."
I smiled at her. It was so obvious how much she wanted to spend time with Sam, but she was really sweet to offer that. I told her, "No, you go. I kind of want to be alone right now."
She smiled softly and nodded.
When she was gone, I looked back up at the shining gold star in the sky. "Thank you, Rachel. For everything. I love you."
The star shined even brighter, and I knew that was Rachel, telling me she loved me too.
Lol, kind of a cheesy ending, but hey, I love those. And some of you thought that I'd make Finn end up with Quinn...NEVER! I HATE Fuinn! (Not Quinn, I like her, but I hate her and Finn as a couple.
That was the end of Selfish! Kind of sad. :( But hopefully I'll write another Finchel story soon. :)
Thanks to those of you who read this fanfiction, it meant a lot to me. :P