Disclaimer: I do not own the Gilmore Girls or any of its characters, nor do I have any connection or affiliation with the actors and actresses, producers, show-runners or the CW. Because let's face it – if I did, Gilmore Girls would still be on, Rory would've married Logan, and I wouldn't be writing this fanfic.

Rating: PG for now, for language.

Major Relationships: Rory & Logan, with Luke & Lorelai from time to time.

Author's Note: Sorry for the delay – I started back at school, so I had to get in the swing of things. Thanks for the support and wonderful reviews. I hope you continue to enjoy these installments. 

If I Never See You Again

By Heather Nicole

Chapter 8

Suddenly, she was nervous. She hadn't realized how much she had been waiting for this moment and the nerves that it would elicit within her.

She'd spent the entire plane ride thinking about what to say and how to say it … but now, when she was where she wanted to be, about to say and do the things she wanted to do … she couldn't remember any of it. She was at a complete loss for words.

And so she simply stood there for a minutes, taking in the view.

The house was beautiful.

It had a decent sized front yard, and a big beautiful front porch – the kind of porch that was perfect to sit out on and read all day until the night fell. It reminded her of her porch in Stars Hollow. Instantly, it reminded her of home … had he known what a comforting feature it would be to her? Of course he had.

The house itself was made mostly of light tan brick. The house seemed light and airy, even from the front yard. Ceiling to floor window panes lined the front rooms. Looking up, Rory noticed a beautiful picture window that appeared to have a window seat. She took a step to the side to look towards the backyard, where she saw it – the avocado tree.

Rory was instantly overcome by the beauty of the house and by the beauty in the gesture – this was the house Logan had picked out for them to start their lives in. It was perfect.

It took her forever to approach the front door. It took her forever to compose herself to even get up the steps to get to the front door.

Eventually, she made it.

Then she just had to get up the bravery to knock. Or ring the door bell. Which should she do? Sometimes, people don't hear knocking. But some people think door bells are just annoying.

This was silly. She told herself. But nevertheless, she scurried down the steps again, down the front path, and down a considerable length of the sidewalk where she was sure he couldn't see her if he looked out the window.

She fiddled with the things in her messenger bag, searching for her phone. She speed dialed Lane and waited for the answer.

"Hello?" Lane answered, carefully holding the phone between her shoulder and her ear as she finished changing Kwan's diaper.

"I have no idea what I am doing, and it is all your fault," Rory said.

"Hang on," Lane said. She motioned for Zach to come over and finish the job, and then made her way out to the porch. Now, diaper-free, she could address the situation at hand – and hoped beyond hope that Rory had come to her senses. "So what is it that you're doing, and why is it my fault?"

"I can't knock. Or ring the door bell," Rory said, each word short, fractured and panicked.

"What?" Lane said.

"I just stood there, on the porch not knowing what to do. I feel like I've been here for hours," Rory said.

"Been where for hours?" Lane asked.

Rory hesitated, feeling stupid for being where she was, for throwing her perfect job out the window. Even though Lane had encouraged her, she felt silly to even say it. Because even though Lane had helped her to get to this point, and even though she did feel in her gut that there was no way that this could be wrong, she was afraid. She was alone in her fear, and Lane was thousands of miles away. It would be easier to be starting a new job, she thought to herself.

"Rory, where are you?" Lane responded to the silence.

"California."

"You're in California? How did you end up in California?" Lane asked, excitedly.

"I dematerialized in Chicago, and rematerialized in San Francisco," Rory retorted. "I flew, how do you think I got here? Why do you sound so surprised? You're the one who told me to do this!"

"I just didn't think you would, I didn't think you would have the guts. I mean, I figured you'd stew over it for a few weeks, give him a call. I never thought you'd actually take the address and go to California, it's very un-Rory," Lane began, honestly. "Not that I'm not glad you did it – I am, it's great. But how did you manage to afford it?"

"Credit card," Rory said. "Not mine. My grandparents'."

"Ballsy," Lane admired.

"Yes. If by ballsy you mean stupid," Rory responded. "I'm in a state I've never been in, in a gigantic city that I couldn't begin to navigate, to chase down a boy whose proposal I turned down, for which I had to throw a perfectly good job opportunity to the dogs, and I paid for it all with my grandparents' credit card, without asking. If I ever go back to Connecticut, my whole immediately family is going to line up to tar and feather me."

"You're overreacting," Lane attempted to calm her down. "It's just your grandparents. And hey, you only bought yourself a ticket to California – that's tame. Didn't you tell me that your grandma once tried to buy a whole plane in a fit of rage? You're doing just fine."

"It's not just them, you know," Rory said, softly.

"We're talking Lorelai?" Lane said.

"Yea," Rory said. "I mean, she went crazy with me over the past few days to get me ready to go. She beat the emotional crap out of herself to send me away, helping me pack, thinking it was for this amazing job … and then I didn't even make it to Iowa. I bailed out on said job before I ever even got on the plane to get to the job, and instead, got on a job to come to California, for a man my mom doesn't really want me to marry. And it might not even work out. And if it doesn't, I don't have the job, I don't have the man, and I also don't have any underwear or clothes, or any of my belongings that I packed, because my luggage was already checked and bound for Des Moines."

"Okay, first of all – you can get your luggage back, that should be the least of your worries," Lane began. "And second, your mom just doesn't want you to get married young and regret it. That doesn't have anything to do with whether or not she approves of Logan. The very fact that she told him it was okay with her to ask you to marry him means she must, on some level, like him, because your mom is not one to hold back. It's got to be scary for her as your mom – remember that. Her whole life, she's been able to teach you and guide you. This is not something she can teach you how to do or to be ready for … she hasn't been there herself yet, really, at least not successfully. She's afraid for you because she loves you, but if this is what will make you happy, then you know she'll get on board."

"I hope so … of course, doing that requires that I actually get up the nerve to go knock on the door," Rory said.