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The shortest Harry/Pansy ever.
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Pansy Parkinson had a deep dark secret. She was madly in love with Harry Potter. She couldn't keep her mind off him and his perfectly mussed hair, his Quidditch-toned body, and his extremely good luck. Not to mention his rad DADA skills.
Best of all, he was forbidden.
So she waited until he was alone, then she kidnapped him and force-fed him a love potion. In all honesty, Pansy was surprised that she'd managed to get her hands on a love potion, but then she remembered she was in fanfiction land—a magical place of irresponsible potions masters who let their students brew illegal love potions and then leave said illegal potions out in the open where anyone could use them.
Now Pansy's world was a beautiful place where Harry loved her more than chocolate frogs.
The only problem was, now that Harry wasn't forbidden Pansy lost all interest in him.
So Harry went to Draco Malfoy because Draco owed him for the year's supply of Aquanet he had given the Slytherin. Draco grudgingly agreed to convince Pansy that Harry was indeed forbidden. And so Harry and Pansy stayed together for the rest of their lives.
And Draco occasionally reminded Pansy that Harry was forbidden, sparking intense snogging sessions.
The End.
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Excuse my brief rant: Quidditch is not going to tone anyone's body. You sit on a broom. There is absolutely no activity in the sport that will give any guy any sort of huge muscles. ::ahem:: Now that that's done….
I'd use my love potion on Ben Barnes.