"Allie," Mrs. Costa had an unusually authoritative voice, "we need to talk."
"Hm?" I replied checking my reflection in the mirror. It was just a few minutes before Jake was going to pick me up and take me to Sam and Emily's wedding.
Mrs. Costa pulled out a chair and sat down motioning for me to join her.
"Since you're going to a wedding and since you and Jacob have been spending a lot of time together, I think it's about time we had this discussion." She paused as I sat down in one of the kitchen chairs. "You see, when you're a teenager, you often get strong feelings for another person, and some of these feelings, um . . . Can make you get carried away. Understand?" She looked at me.
"Not in the least bit," I told her tapping my foot on the floor. I was impatient for Jacob to get here. I missed him.
"Okay. Well. Let me phrase it this way. Don't have sex with Jacob tonight okay?"
I jerked. "WHAT?"
She smiled at me. Oh. My. God. We were not going to have the sex talk were we?
"It's just that I know that right now all your hormones are out of control--"
"We are not going to have this conversation. This is mortifying." I hid my face in my hands so I wouldn't have to make eye contact with Mrs. Costa.
There was a knock at the door and I jumped up grateful for Jacob's interruption. This was feeling weirdly like an episode of Seventh Heaven. I hurried out the door, pushing Jacob off the porch as fast as possible. But not fast enough.
Mrs. Costa's voice reached us just as we arrived at Jacob's car. Quil, Embry, Kim, Jared, Jacob and I all heard her parting words loud and clear.
"IF WORST COMES TO WORST JUST TELL JAKE TO NOT BE A FOOL AND WRAP HIS TOOL!"
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The wedding was absolutely perfect. I mean it was set in the morning in the forest with the sunlight streaming down through the tree's casting everyone in a glow. Yes, you heard correctly, sunlight. It was sunny as it should be on a wedding day.
Of course I looked like a complete idiot because I got all caught up in the moment. When Emily first appeared I quickly glanced at Sam to see what his face would look like. I forget if I saw it in a movie or something but they said that their favorite part of the wedding was the look on the groom's face when he first saw his bride. And I understood why.
The look on Sam's face was one of awe, shock, a touch of wonder and overwhelmingly, of love. I sighed happily and leaned against Jacob.
Emily was gorgeous of course, even with her scars. She radiated pure beauty and the simple white gown she wore accented her amazingly.
I cried of course, when they said their vows. I could feel Jacob's silent laughter at my tears and hear Quil's not so silent laughter at my tears. But really, it was all too perfect.
After the ceremony and reception all of us decided to take a walk. By us I mean, Quil, Embry, Jared, Kim, Jacob, Leah and I. Paul was angry all the time so we tended to avoid him.
We ended up on the beach all laughing and talking about the wedding. It was hot and the sun was out. I sat next to Jacob on a log on the beach, waving my hand in the air trying to cool myself down. I looked out at the waves splashing oh-so invitingly at me.
Ding ding. We have a winner.
"It's hot," I said standing up, "I have got to cool off."
"Well duh, we're all hot," Quil said.
I turned and smiled devilishly at all of them. And then I started to take off my dress. I was standing there in front of them clad only in my bra and underwear. The looks of shock on their faces were enough to start me giggling.
"Last one in is a vampire!" I yelled racing towards the water. I took one look back before diving in the waves. Leah was the first to catch on. She came dashing towards me, also clad in her undergarments. We both stopped just short of the edge of the water.
"Ready?" she asked. I nodded.
We both took running jumps and splashed into the ocean. It was cold that much was for certain. I cooled off very quickly. The waves crashed into me, soaking more of my body. I shrieked and tried backing up. Leah's laughter bounced off the water.
My hasty retreat abruptly caused me to back into a rather warm rock. Strong arms wrapped around me and heaved me off my feet. I was moving swiftly back towards the water.
"I think I like this idea of yours," Jacob said into my ear rather amusedly. I screeched protests as we went deeper into the water. But having your own personal space heater in cold ocean water doesn't make it such a bad thing. I turned around so that I could cling to Jacob and face him. The other's were in the water now too, all laughing and splashing around.
"It was rather brilliant wasn't it," I told him smirking. He smiled evilly back at me, his hands feeling up and down my back.
"Yes," he said letting out a low chuckle in response to my shiver because of his hands, "slightly brilliant. Although I would have preferred for us to go swimming alone."
I raised an eyebrow at him.
"I didn't like it that everyone else got to see you running around in your skivvies," he said in response to my expression.
I laughed at his jealousy, really it was just so adorable. "There's been a lot of people who've gotten to see me in my skivvies before you Jake," his expression darkened, "not here, back home, in Chicago. I was a different girl back then."
The light atmosphere seemed to tense considerably. Jacob moved us a few yards away from everyone else-- I couldn't touch the pebbly bottom any longer. He stared at me with a look on his face that I can't describe.
I watched him uncertainly. There was a long silence.
"Explain." He seemed to be forcing himself to speak calmly. My eyes widened.
"It's just that . . .I was different there, than here. I--I was acting out and trying to forget things. In trying to-- to forget I ended up doing a lot of things I regret now." I watched him.
His face stayed in it's carefully composed mask. Jacob seemed to be waiting for me to continue. I wasn't sure how to continue.
I hadn't had the easiest life. I had done a lot of things that I regret. But that didn't change the fact that I did them. I bit my lip, trying to figure out how to best explain this. I realized that Jacob didn't know much about me from before I moved to La Push. Every time he brought up anything about my past I tended to change the subject. I didn't want him to get hurt. Or for me to get hurt.
"Jacob," I started again still inwardly debating, "I tried to find an escape through anything I could get my hands on. Drugs, alcohol-- you name it. I haven't had a good home life as you can tell." I shrugged apologetically.
"No, I can't tell," his tone was quietly furious, "because every time I ask about your home, your family, your past, you change the subject. It's like you don't want me to know anything about you."
"It's not that I don't want you to know anything, it's that I'm not. . .comfort--" I broke off realizing what I was about to say. How that statement could hurt Jacob.
"Comfortable? Not comfortable telling me about your life?" He was absolutely livid now, I could feel him shaking and he released me from his hold. I treaded water looking at him uncertainly. "Obviously, we're not as close as I thought we were since there's things you can't tell me about. Bella," he sneered the name, "told me everything and she wasn't even in love with me." I felt as though I'd been slapped.
I held my voice very even although I felt like crying. I said coldly to Jacob, "Fine. If she told you so much, why don't you go talk to her? Oh wait. You can't because she's a leech."
Jacob's mouth opened in a 'o' and his dark eyes flashed. He was completely shaking violently all over. He shot me a cold look and swam away from me, out of the water. Without another backwards glance he took off for the woods leaving me alone and miserable in the water.
As soon as he left, the full realization of my words hit me. I had hit him below the belt. I had hurt Jacob deeply and he would probably never forgive me.
Weakly I waded out of the ocean only to collapse on the beach sobbing. I heard soft footsteps around me.
"Allie?" It was Kim. "Are you okay?" Her soft comforting words made me sob even harder. Oh God, what had I done?
She sat down next to me and pulled me into her lap, brushing my hair from my face and making soothing noises.
"I--I did something awful," my words came out choked in between sobs, "I-- I hurt him. I hurt him so b-bad." I wailed unhappily. Leah came and sat on my other side. The boys stayed back, not sure of what happened or how to deal with the situation. "It's all my f-f-fault. He'll never forgive me. I ruined it. Just like I ruin everything." The last bit I said with venom.
"Shhh. He'll forgive you Allie, Jacob loves you."
"I'm not so sure anymore," I said my vocal crying over with and now the silent tears just coursing down my cheeks. I shuddered and Leah gave me a hug.
I stayed that way and gave my entire body over to misery.
What had I done?
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Phew. Talk about your teen angst. Sorry I got all dramatic on you guys there, but I felt we needed some drama in this story. Also, more to come about Allie's (duh duh duh duhhhhhh) past in the next chapter. As y'all know I appreciate those reviews! They make the writing go faster.