Behind the Walls of HQ

by svvanmillsarchive

Haven't you ever wondered what happens in Central City Headquaters? These were some of the untold stories... When I say this is rated T, it's rated STRONGLY. Criticism is taken, flaming is ignored!

3. Chapter 3

This is a fairly short chapter, mostly because I've typed it out quite a while ago! If you know me (aka Mai over there), then you've already read this. I wanted this to be my fourth chapter, but my parents are only letting me on TWO HOURS A DAY. D: Noooooo, the horror! Anyway, I actually have a name for this chapter! I call it 'Innuendoes'. Teehee! Now, if you don't know what an innuendo is, here's an example:

Hawkeye: Fuck you, Mustang!

Mustang: Pretty please?

Not only is this example extremely funny, but it's easy to imagine! So, an innuendo is pretty much a statement to if you have a dirty mind, it relates to the nasty. Now, let's do the disclaimer.

Disclaimer: Hmm. Have Hawkeye and Mustang been married and blessed with children yet? Then I certainly do not own Fullmetal Alchemist. Sadly. Very sadly. NO, AUTOCORRECT, I DON'T CARE THAT THAT'S A SENTENCE FRAGMENT. /ahem

Roy Mustang and Riza Hawkeye were in trouble.

"Sir, it's stuck!"

"I know it's stuck, Lieutenant, it's mine."

"I told you not to stick it in there, Sir!"

"I was trying to clean it?"

"With that? It's too big!"

"Sorry..."

The lieutenant sighed. "Just help me try to get it out." They tugged in opposite direction.

Roy moaned. "Ow, be careful! I can't replace this!"

"I'm sure you can live without it, Sir."

"Never!"

Maes, who was at the door listening to the entire conversation, couldn't help but giggle like a school girl. In the office? With the Lieutenant? It was pretty hard to believe.

"Sir, pull harder!"

"I TOLD YOU IT'S STUCK!"

"It's your fault! The hole is too tight for something that large to fit in!"

"I was trying to help..."

"You weren't helping, sir."

Maes was holding his hand to his mouth to contain his laughter.

"Come on, please try and take care of it!"

Maes couldn't help himself and burst through the door. "And to believe that you two would... Wait, what?" Maes was dumbfounded.

Roy looked at him. "What else did you expect it to be? Now can you help me get my finger out the Lieutenant's gun? It's attached to my glove!"

Well, there you have it. It's short, but when I showed it to my friends, every one of them burst out laughing. So, hope you like! R/R cause you love me!

Not like that…