Disclaimer: If Gakuen alice was mine, then Natsume hyuuga will be mine, unfortunately, It isn't...
Odd romance
Title: Red eyed Boy.
Summary : Loneliness is her daily life feeling. But, then someday she wants to change. She wants to hope for a brighter future. A future with someone. Someone that don't despite her.
People who say that they like to be alone have never been really alone. They don't know what exclusion means. They don't feel the cold and emptiness in which I'm surrounded and even in a crowd of people. People who say that surely has a lot of friends who will comfort them in the darkest days, someone to talk to when they want, someone to turn to when they need. Basically all I can't have. All I am deprived... Who knows what true happiness means? Even the saddest people always keep a memory or an illusion to keep living. To keep wishing that one day, they will find happiness.
And the time takes everything, like it or not. The time takes everything, erases everything and all that remains in the end, is darkness. Sometimes, in the darkness, you meet others people. And sometimes, at the heart of the darkness, you lose them again... And I do not want to live like this.
Everyone hate and despite me, I don't why, they just do, perhaps I'm just so ugly that they can't even look at me, or is it what I deserve? But, why I haven't done anything wrong.
As I was going to my class room, I keep looking down in hope that no one will stop me and beat me like always... I entered the class and walked stretch to my seat and said nothing despite the snide remarks from other students as "Hey, ugly, how are you?" Or "How do you feel when you're not the same as the others? Certainly very bad, I'm sure, huh? You got to be feeling bad!" I want to run away... I want to escape from this. I may be a coward, escaping like that but, how can I win against them? How can I reply to them when I'm all alone? They will surely kill me if I say sometime so better keep avoiding them.
.
Finally I heard the ringing and it was then that I began to run away from them. With all my strength. Until my lungs explode, and even more.
Nothing matters anymore. All I have to do is to keep Running.
And do not stop.
I'm out of breath and my lungs hurt. I slide along a wall, unable to restrain anything more of myself. My mask fell. And even before I was completely down, I began to cry. I can't breathe and my sobs choke in my throat, letting small sound of hiccups of agony. My whole body shakes. It hurts. I felt like I'm drowning and yet it burns.
I want to be listened to, I want people to accept me, I want someone to notice me. It's always the same. All the time, day after day. For years, my smiling face fades away because of their hurting words. My heart ache because of them.
I tell myself that deep down, somehow, I'm strong and that I'm like everyone, I'm human... Wrong. I'm not, I know very well. I don't need them to tell it to me constantly, I don't need them to hurt me every time ... I'm well aware of it, but I don't want things to remain like that. I don't want to keep suffering alone. I want something else. I want someone. Someone for me... Is that asking too much? I shake my little fists determined; I raise my head and look ahead. So what if I break my teeth. And what if it breaks the little that remains in me. I want sometime new, I want to be happy, to have someone to hold to. I want to hope for something else. Hope for a future that doesn't reflect today. I want to expect something that'll my broken heart feel alive...
So, I stood up and walked to the nearest person.
I know this someone heard me approach, but he doesn't seem to turn around. He doesn't seem to really care. And suddenly, I felt stupid. I want to backtrack, to act as if nothing had happened, to take my road of "always", all alone, because, it's less frightening. Because right now, I'm scared. But little by little, I came next to him. I can no longer turn around now. He's right there, just inches away from me and he still doesn't look at me.
And I throw myself into the water. Or more accurately, I skipped. My foot slipped, I lost my balance and I fell. I look really stupid like this... But he hasn't laughed at me. My eyes were still closed when I finally felt his body move and strangely he leaned toward me. I was surprised, will he hit me?
"Hey, polka dots, will you take my hand or what?" He said in a cold voice.
He was just... Just helping me? I'm confused yet, deep down I can't help but be happy. I thought that he was going to hit me and hate me like the other. I held out my hand, hesitating a little and I catch his. I was going to stand up but I was thrown against him. Against his chest. I blushed. I backed away, to look at him and, I was surprised to found two beautiful red eyes. That's the first time I see someone with such eyes. They were shining, and after what seem like a long time I snapped, thanking him and then begun to run away. Hiding my blush and my little smile.
Maybe, Just Maybe, we will meet again? But, I'm an idiot! I didn't ask his name! Well, Red-eyed boy, I hope that we'll meet again...
Wait.
Polka dots?