HEY-HO!!! MY LOVELY LOYAL READERS! RAYNIE DAI HERE, SAYING STOP YOUR WHINING, I FEEL LIKE I HAVE TO CALL THE AMBULANCE I THINK YOU NEED SOME CHEESE WITH THAT WHINE! JK, I WUV YA ALL! SO WHILE YOU'RE WAITING FOR MY NEXT UPDATE, CHECK OUT "STUPID CUPID!" MY NEW FANFICTION. AS ALWAYS REVIEW, REEEEVIEWWWW, REEEEVIEWWWW, MAKE IT YOUR NEW MANTRA!

DISCLAMER: INTITLED F-ED UP TRICK THE VOICE IN MY HEAD PLAYED ON ME, AND I FELL FOR IT!!!

INNER VOICE: HEY, RAY GUESS WHAT!

RAYNIE: HEY INNER VOICE I DON'T KNOW*GIVES A SHRUG*, CHICKEN BUTT?

INNER VOICE: YOU GET YOUR DEEPEST WISH!!!

RAYNIE: WORLD PEACE!

INNER VOICE: EVEN BETTER! YOU OWN TWILIGHT!

RAYNIE: WHAT?! REALLY?!

INNER VOICE: NO, DUMB$$!!! I CANT BELIEVE YOU FELL FOR THAT!

RAYNIE: SO… I STILL DON'T OWN TWILIGHT OR ANY OF THE CHARATICTERS!*PITIFLY CRYING IN THE CORNER*

INNER VOICE: WAIT DO YOU HEAR THAT…I THINK IT'S THE WHAM-BULAINCE (ambulance) HERE TO PICK YOU UP!

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Oh My Edward, What A Big ..-You Have

Previously on Edward's Little Slave:

"Sorry, Bella" I said in a voice tinged with sorrow and I knew if I were human I would have shed a tear or two, then again if I were human none of this damn, there goes the swearing again, things would be happening to me right now.

"So? What option are you going to go with?" said a concerned Alice

"I'll go with what's behind door number…"

Currently: (Edward P.O.V)

"Umm...Edward the suspense is killing me! You know I can't read minds like you, and it's really annoying!" said Alice, obviously ticked off.

"Well, not all minds." I mumbled in response, I hoped it was too low for Alice to hear.

"Wait WHAT!" She screamed in response. My hopes were yet again shattered; can't a guy catch a break? "Okay, let me calm down," she paused. "What do you mean not all minds?" she asked calmly almost in the motherly 'poor baby did you get an owwey?' voice.

"Well, I was trying to listen to Bella's thoughts and…" I started

"Wait, so I'm to assume that the girl lying in your arms, is this so called Bella?" she said, still with the mommy voice. That got annoying REALLY fast!

"Yes, her name is Bella and when I tried to listen to her thoughts there was nothing, no voice, no thoughts, nothing!" I exclaimed

Alice said with a shrug, "Don't take this the wrong way, but maybe there were no thoughts to be heard."

"What do you mean no thoughts? Even the stupidest person on this God forsaken planet has thoughts! Maybe they're not coherent or interesting thoughts but they're thoughts none the less!" I yelled back defensively. I don't know why I was getting all worked up over this, a mean she's just a worthless human being.

"Chill, Edward all I meant was that she was kidnapped, put in a strange tube, and saw you rip that vamp apart. Obviously she was in shock from the moment she woke up not knowing where she was!" Alice paused for a second, waiting for me to say something. "Oh, and who was that vamp and by the way? I had a vision of you fighting with someone AGAIN, so I came down here to stop it or break it up before something bad happened. As you should know, I was a little too late for that one. But I didn't see who it was in the vision before you cooked him Cajun style." said Alice

"Oh just James, man old friend. You remember him, right?" I said in a forced light tone.

"I vaguely remember him, but the person I remember most is that crazy mate of his. What was her name again? V-vi…" Alice said trying to get the name to roll of her tongue or for me to finish the name for her.

"Victoria?" I said with a light questionable tone.

"Yeah her, she is going to go ape shit crazy when she finds out what you did!" she said with a little chuckle. Thought she wouldn't have chuckled if she heard the thought that I just heard.

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"Alice, I have made my decision. Where's your car?" I asked as I was picking Bella up and walked a little over human speed towards the garage where Alice's car was parked. Bella was so light weight, it was as if she was a little girl's doll (except for the scandalous clothing of course!) instead of a delicious smelling 18-year-old girl from Forks.

"Okay, where are we going? And why are you in such a ru…" Alice stopped in the middle of handing me her keys, and she stared into space. She was having a vision when a viscous scream was let out in the room just behind us.

Alice snapped out of the vision with new understanding and unlocked the car so I could put Bella in the backseat. The car peeled out of the garage at a so fast I almost got whiplash.

Alice looked at me with the look saying the phrase that was paired with it oh-so well. "I told you so. I told you she was going to go ape shit crazy!"

"CULLEN!!!"

I heard a voice yell and I knew it wasn't Alice mentally screaming at me.

"I told you so!" Alice thought tauntingly.

"Not right now Alice!" I yell in reply.

She cracked a little smile and said "WHAT! I didn't say anything!"

Then I heard something that if I was human would have made my heart either stop or double in pace. I heard a soft moan from the back seat.

"Edward"

I turned to see if the angel that spoke my name was awake, but she wasn't. Instead I learned that she was dreaming, about me!

It must be a nightmare if I am in it!!! I thought in a harsh voice

Alice P.O.V

VISION

-The woman with the fiery hair opened the doors to the auction room, in hopes of finding her mate. When see opened the door there was chair in pieces scattered on the floor and a fire slowly dying, yet next to the fire was a piece of flesh. The women quickly ran over the flesh on the floor and smelt it."NO!!!" She yells "IT CAN'T BE! NO!" but then she catches another familiar smell. "Cullen" she whispered, "Damn you! I will find you and get retribution!" the women turned around and ran..-

END OF VISION

I unlocked the car for Edward so he could put Bella in the backseat. He peeled out of the garage and all could think to say was "I told you so. I told you she was going to go ape shit crazy!"

Bella P.O.V

When I awoke, I was on a king sized canopy bed. The canopy was made of rich scarlet velvet as were the pillows and the sheets I was laid down upon. I looked around the room and it was like the scene from the movie "Queen of the Damned". I felt like I was Lestat, when he wakes up in the castle after being turned.

I looked down at what I was wearing, at least this time it was a little more modest. I was wearing a skin tight, white see-through lace frock with a white lace bra and panties set under it.

All of a sudden, the heavy wooden door opened on the other side of the room and there appeared my dark angel.

"Edward." I said in a low mumble, he only nodded in reply.

He was looking even more deviously handsome then the last time I saw him. He was in a dark cloak that was open so that you could see his white pirate looking shirt that hung loosly from his smooth, muscular milky white skin. He also wore black dress pants that flowed with each motion as he made his way, painfully slow, towards the bed that I was placed upon.

"Hello, my sweet Bella." He said with his musical voice. I could smell his sweet sent as he bent over me. Softly kissing my collarbone and working up to the hollow in my neck.

I tilted my head to the side to expose my neck further and I took a sharp intake of breath as he sank his teeth in to my neck.

"Edward" I moaned response and cuddled my neck up to his mouth to encourage him to drink more of my blood. Then my vision faded out, I struggled to go back to where we were in the tower but I found out too late, that the more I struggled, the faster I drifted away.

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I sat straight up and the first thing I did was look at was the way I was dressed. At first I was relieved. At least I was dressed this time!!!! Yay me! I had the weirdest dream, I felt like Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz. I thought I was kidnapped, and then sold as a slave, and then, I dreamt that the man of my dreams was a vampire.

Wait…no…no…NO...NOT AGAIN!!! THESE ARE NOT MY CLOTHES!!! THIS ISN'T MY ROOM!!! I tried to scramble out of the bed that I was laying in, but my foot got caught in the covers and I fell to the floor. I waited for my face to meet its old friend the floor.

All my breath whooshed out of me and I was expecting pain, but all I heard was a small chuckle as my savor lifted me up and placed me back on the bed.

"Good afternoon, Bella." Said the-man-of-my-dreams. No, he was literally the man from my dream! What was his name again…. Hmmmmm… Edward, and currently he was giving me a calculating look.

"Oh. Hey Edward." I said. He let out a little sigh and he disappeared and ended up at the other side of the room. How did he do that?!

My mouth must of fell open at that very moment in shock because Edward gave another chuckle and said "Shout your mouth or you'll let flies in."

"H-how did y-you do that!" I screamed.

"Damn; aftershock." I heard him mumble. He reappeared suddenly by my side.

"GET AWAY!" I screamed again. I really didn't know why I did scream. Because for some reason I knew that Edward would never hurt me, but it felt good to just scream.

"Shhhh, Bella. Shhh. It okay, nobody here is going to hurt you." He gave a chuckle at the last statement, while he pulled me into his cool body and with one hand rubbed circles in my back while simultaneously held my hand and rubbed small circles in to it with his thumb.

"W-where am I, anyways?" I asked when I was finally calm.

"You're at my house" replied Edward. "Do you feel better?" he asked with a concerned look on his face

"A little bit." I said in a small voice. I looked around the room. For the most part it was bare. The only furniture in the was room was a small black couch, an entertainment center which consisted of a 50' flat screen, a DVD player, a huge stereo system, and an even bigger collection of CD's. There were three doors, a desk, and a bed - the one that I'm currently sitting on with Edward.

Then realization hit me; I-AM-ALONE-ON-A-BED-WITH-EDWARD! I instantly felt my cheeks turn a violent red.

Edward must have felt me because he jumped off the bed and when I looked up, he stood 5 feet away from me.

"So, umm this is my room" he said.

I felt my cheeks reach seamlessly, a deep red, when he talked.

"You will have your own room once Alice is finished with it." He paused. "Oh, and I hope you like the clothes" he said as he gestured toward me with him head. I guess my cheeks could still become more flustered, because with that they turn shades darker. The deepening of my blush and the horrified look on my face must have clued him into what I was thinking because he gave a small look of horror and managed to sputter out "Of course, I had Alice pick them out and put them on you!"

My blush eased up a little and I looked around once more and said one of the blondest things in my life " Oh My Edward what a BIG room you have" ooops… blush returning to my face and Edward made this scoffing noise and busted out laughing and after my moment of terror ended I joined in on the laugh.

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First, I would like to say I am sorry it took so long but I am back at school and I actually have to do work! Ewww, work! I know right! And then I would like to say thanks for sticking around and meeting my demands, but this is not the last chapter by far NO! As you can see I lu-u-uve cliffies and I have left you with one! MUAHAHA-clap of thunder-HAHAAAA!

CHAPTER 5: HELP ME! THIS LADY AND HER EVIL INNER VOICE ARE KEEPING ME HOSTAGE! The lady isn't so bad but her inner voice keeps playing mean jokes on the lady and arguing with her and that's not even the worst part no the worst part is that THE LADYS LOSING!!!

-smack-

Raynie Dai: I ask of the usuall some reviews and paitents cause these chapters don't just fly out of my…..HEAD. OH and did you guys hear they are making a Dragonball Z movie called "Dragonball Evolution" hehe! I think that is going to be sooo corny…that's why I going to see it! Hehehe!!!

KA-MA-HA-MA-AH-AAAAA! WITH MY LO-review-VE!!! :p

-Raynie

P.S. I couldn't resist putting in the mama mia comment the ..dot. I thought that would be funny for those who have seen it and remember that ..dot meant that they had sex!