The main characters don't belong to me but to the creators of CSI NY tv series.

But Maria Kostopoulos is totally mine!

Thanks to Lily Moonlight a thousand times for the help with the English text.

I Can't Say Goodbye

Chapter 11

Getting rid of feeling jet-lagged had taken Stella several weeks, she had felt tired almost always and although she loved the Greek food, during the two months following her arrival it all made her sick. But, finally, it seemed that the problem was over now, she was sleeping deeply and enjoying a voracious appetite... In fact in recent days she had gained weight, she was noticing the effect on her clothes, and even her face had rounded. She'd have to start thinking about controlling herself... but she didn't know if she'd be able to, while Maria Kostopoulos was in charge of her home. She smiled at the thought of her. That was another recent novelty, too, wanting to smile again, despite everything.

She stretched on her bed, arms and legs outstretched. The sun's rays of the Saturday morning which she didn't have to work filtered through the curtains and caressed her curls, putting golden sparkles in them. She had awakened, as every day, believing she had Mac's smell, the warmth of his body next to her, his hand on her waist like that last and only morning they had shared. Now this thought didn't make her mourn as it had for weeks. With the distance and the time Stella's mind had calmed down, and those words that Mac had said in dreams to his late wife didn't seem so terrible. Gee, he was dreaming, and no one can control his dreams. She had never given him an opportunity to tell her what it was about. Dreams can recreate implausible stories, transport you to another time. Perhaps that night he had felt so happy after so much time that his subconscious had led him to the happy days of his marriage to Claire, and the dream had to do with it. Perhaps he didn't even remember when he woke up, as often happens. Perhaps… She didn't even know what to think now.

Muted noises were heard in the house. It had to be Maria, surely in the kitchen. She didn't have to come on Saturdays, but she always came in the morning to have food cooked and the house tidy for Stella. Stella let the woman spoil her, because no one had ever had so much concern for her well-being everyday; what she ate, what she wore... her clothes had never before been so neat, clean, ironed and ready when needed.

When Stella arrived at Athens, some of her fears dissipated. She had feared having to face the search for an apartment to her liking, although the conditions of her contract clearly stated that the US Embassy would provide her a home, and she didn't want to waste time in organizing her daily life while her whole attention should be in taking control of her new job, which didn't seem an easy task.

The week she had spent in Washington allowed her to know what was expected of her. She was introduced to the Chiefs of Departments she should coordinate to design a new routine for all matters relating to the safety of American personnel abroad, starting with Europe. It was planned that routine should become the basic protocol to be followed worldwide. Above all, she had to prepare the visits of the President to the area and activate the special security measures for the leading personalities of the nation. She had even visited the White House and met the security officials with whom she should have to deal personally in the future.

Stella was surprised about the amount of things she had learned that week about the national security systems. Her status had changed, she had been advised that from the moment they took over her documentation and wrote the contract, and from that date, all her personal details became confidential, as befitting her new position, so that no one could track her movements or whereabouts. This would allow her to avoid Mac for the time she wanted, Stella had thought, pretty sure that he would look for her. The thought had disturbed her then, and it continued to do so every time it returned to her mind. What would have been Mac's reaction upon seeing that he couldn't follow her steps, despite the expertise of those hands (Adam's, surely) that consulted the computer?

Fortunately, the fear of not finding an appropriate home had vanished when she had arrived in Athens. The driver who had been assigned took care of her and her luggage at the airport, and after presenting herself at the Embassy and being immediately greeted with all deference by the ambassador, the secretary of staff had accompanied her to her new home. It wasn't far from downtown but in an extremely quiet residential neighbourhood, where almost all the houses were occupied by staff of the diplomatic corps in the Greek capital, most of them from the embassy and the American colony. The house, a villa in Mediterranean style, had white walls and a red tile roof. It wasn't too big but compared to what Stella had had so far it was huge. There was a lovely garden too, perfectly kept, and even a private pool. It was decorated in bright colours and lots of white, so it looked like a clean and really happy place. Stella loved it.

She could barely believe that, furthermore, under the terms of her contract, the embassy took care of all expenses and she didn't have to pay anything, not even the salary of her brand new housekeeper. And there she was, Maria, on that first day, receiving her with a very formal handshake, until she heard Stella reply to her greeting in Greek, which earned her a hug. Maria was also hired by the embassy, and in her many years of service to the diverse staff who had passed throughAthens, not one of her masters had spoken Greek so fluently, or even taken the trouble to learn a few words. So, Stella speaking fluent Greek had been wonderful for a woman like her, who was cheerful and communicative. In a few days Stella became to Maria more her little girl than her mistress. She loved Stella from the beginning, with her beautiful curls, her beautiful green eyes and her smile so... sad. The contrast between the sweetness of her eyes and the sadness they betrayed intrigued Maria deeply. And soon came those days when Stella was feeling so bad, even though she prepared her the best meals, healthy and light. She arrived in the morning before Stella left for work and she heard her throw up most of the days, she saw her with dark circles from the lack of sleep, and a fatigue that seemed not to abandon her... Maria had been worried sick until she became convinced that Stella wasn't sick.

Only a week after her installation, Stella already knew her housekeeper's life in every detail. Originally from one of the Dodecanese islands, the tiny Arki, her husband, a fisherman, had died in a shipwreck. With his son less than one year old, the young widow had emigrated to Athens with the hope of finding a better life and willing to avoid her child following the almost inevitable destiny of being a fisherman like his ancestors had been for generations. Soon she had found work, hard and poorly paid, as a woman of service, and after a few years she had succeeded, thanks to her great references, to enter the cleaning staff at the American Embassy. From there she moved to keep the family homes of diplomats, which was more relaxed and thoughtful work. She had tried to give her son a good education, she had insisted that he learned English, and she had been lucky that her Kostas was a smart and responsible boy, mindful of the sacrifices his mother made for him. Now, thirty years old, her young man, with an academic qualification in Electronics, tall, handsome and bilingual, was the Chief of Maintenance Service Systems to the American Embassy and all the buildings attached to it, with a forty people team under his command. Every so often he insisted to his mother that she leave her job, but she didn't intend to until her retirement, a life of leisure didn't fit at all with her. The only sorrow Maria had about her son was that he wasn't married yet, but lately it seemed that he had a girlfriend who had lasted longer than the previous ones and, better still, she seemed to be a good girl, pretty, polite and hardworking. She owned a bookshop in downtown Athens, where she worked personally, and apparently the business was going very well.

So, Stella knew all about Maria and her family, but the amount of information hadn't been reciprocated. Maria sensed that there was a man in Stella's life who had caused her sorrow, but she said nothing. One day, not long ago, Maria had found one of Stella's earrings on the carpet beside the bed. To avoid it being lost, she opened the top drawer of the bedside table to leave it there, and then she had seen the picture, placed in a frame. Why, she had thought, does this girl not put the photo on the bedside table, instead of leaving it in the drawer? That was a sign that she didn't want to see it, but at the same time she wanted to keep it close... Oh, God, what could be the story behind this... She looked closely at the picture. It was Stella, and a rather handsome man, older than her but not too much... his skin was very white, and his blue eyes and the smile seemed to show a calm and reliable temperament. The two were dressed in blue police uniforms. Was he the object of Stella's sorrow? She had thought it would be a guy she would hate, but however, and although she understood the absurdity of making value judgments by a single picture, she was almost certain that the man was worth it. But then... what had happened? But she hoped that everything would be fixed as events take their course and that this girl would not be alone in the situation she was in... She sighed, closed the drawer with the picture inside and left the earring on the table. If Stella wanted her to see the picture, she would put it in a visible place; in the meantime, she wouldn't say anything. As much as she found it hard to live with the intrigue.

Stella looked at the clock the next time she opened her eyes and saw that it was nearly ten o'clock. Lord bless... she had slept twelve hours, this was a record for her, she didn't ever remember doing it. Beating the sweet laziness she was in, she took a shower and dressed in light clothing, as another hot day was coming. She went to the kitchen trying to fasten the button on the waistband without success. She was still trying when Maria greeted her with her sonorous and reliable voice.

"Kalimera, princess. Today, Sleeping Beauty"

"Kalimera, Maria... I think we have to move the button in these pants too... They fitted me fine two weeks ago! I have to eat less."

"I have to eat less! Here we go again! You'll have to eat more, to recover you from the weeks you vomited almost every day." Maria had spoken to Stella from day one more like a daughter to protect than the lady of the house who employed her. The helplessness she saw in that young girl when she came to Greece had hit the older woman, driving her to care for her and love her almost immediately, and much more when she knew her character realizing her sweetness and the sadness she carried.

"Maria, that's more than recovered... Have you not noticed I don't fit in these clothes?"

"That is natural..." Maria was squeezing oranges for a giant juice. She poured it into the glass and put it in Stella's hand.

"Fresh Vitamins, this will feed you without making you gain weight. And then the milk and toast, and the best yogurt in the world, the one which Maria makes for you. All natural and healthy, that's what you need." While taking Stella the juice, Maria had gone and come back in an instant with needle, thread and scissors. She sat down and drew Stella to herself, so that Stella's waist was at the height of her sight and hands.

"Let's fix this." She cut the stitches that secured the button and began to sew it again at the end of the waistband, her actions happening in a heartbeat. When she finished, before fastening it, she brought her face to Stella's waist and planted a resounding kiss on her navel. Stella laughed because of the tickling. But the next thing Maria said almost caused her to drop the glass in surprise.

"You will be here when the baby is born, or you will have returned to America already?"

To be continued...