Well school has allowed me a little time to actually write so here we are! Chapter 17! And since SOME people felt like I didn't get all mushy and stuff in the last one I sort of laid it on a little thick here… honestly people was it that bad? I just didn't see their first time as all butterflies and rainbows (no pun intended)! There was a lot of buildup of sexual tension there that would exploding outwards and needed to be explored! I wanted the first time to be raw and fast because they sure as hell have been waiting a long time. So this is sort of my 'apology' to those who weren't happy with the last chapter. There is butterflies and rainbows out the wazzoo here…LOL
So I figured that since this is the happy chapter I wanted to share a little bit about the way I have seen my Edward and Jasper since day one. Jasper has always been Jackson Rathbone and he is everything I can see in my Prisonsper world…however Edward is NOT Robert Pattinson. Not that I don't love Rpatz but for the man who truly embodies Twinkward I have to say that the only man for the job is the one and only Gaspard Ulliel. Always has been always will. If you don't know who that is it is actually one of Stephanie Meyers original people she wanted to play Edward way back when. Google the man and you'll get to see into my head! LOL Songs for the boys? Jaspers life as of now is encapsulated in Daughtry's - It's Not Over (the music video is plot fodder LOL ) and for some reason when I would go to write him, at least once on Pandora Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata played (Yes I listen to classical music when I write…don't judge LOL). I think this is much more Jasper than any other theme. The soundtrack to Edward is none other than the beautiful instrumental work that Rachael Portman did for the movie Chocolat (also his favorite movie LOL), particularly the track The Three Women. This was my most powerful song reference I had for this story. If you go back to the first 2 chapters play this song on youtube… it adds a beautiful background noise to your inner thoughts.
Well after this very long authors note I just wanted to thank you all for your reviews! I read every single one and I try and comment on all! If I haven't gotten to you yet I am so sorry! I am trying! XD
In conclusion this chapter is a Birthday Gift to my MistyHaze… She is a constant friend and source of inspiration to me! Happy birthday!
Enjoy everyone!
XOXO Maria/Philomina
Edward's world was a sea of inspiration when he woke up.
Usually he was very chipper in the morning, cutting past sleepiness with the thoughts of a tasty breakfast and a nice big cup of coffee. He loved lazy Sundays when he rolled out of bed, in nothing but his underwear and would lounge around watching weekend morning TV, eat and doze and just think about his day.
But this early afternoon he awoke to the feeling of a solid body naked and warm spooned around his back, moist breath hitting the nap of his neck. He felt sublimely sore and thoroughly used in the best of ways, and he stretched his arms out a little enjoying the way his fingertips tingled. Edward felt lighter than he had in weeks, happier than he ever thought he could feel…and he was starving! In more ways than one!
Craning his neck to look back up at Jasper's refreshingly peaceful sleeping face, he couldn't decide what he wanted to nibble on more: Jasper's pink lips or some brunch. Seeing as his stomach was growling and he knew that the poor man didn't get that much sleep, he decided to slip into the kitchen and take care of some food. Jasper could wake up to the smells of tasty things. From growing up in a house where Sunday after breakfast was a must, Edward knew the delights of waking up when the scents of bacon and pancakes and biscuits and scones all reached one's nose and slowly shook you out of slumber.
After carefully wiggling free of Jasper, Edward slipped only a pair of fresh undies on, feeling the need to be as free as possible today. He had always wanted to cook in a natural state and this day seemed like as good as any other to try! There was such a feeling of boundless energy and optimism in his every step and he literally bounced out of his bedroom into the yellow light of his living room. He hurried about plugging the Christmas tree in, turning the fireplace on so it would be nice and warm and cozy when his Jasper woke up (and if he was cooking half naked he didn't want to freeze to death). He quickly lit a couple of scented candles, the aromas of cinnamon and spice bread wafting around his nose. Glancing around, Edward admired the sunlight catching the glints of the freshly fallen snow outside, untouched and glossy, sparkling along the tree branches and off on the distant roofs.
What a perfectly lovely morning…or well afternoon, he should say, as he caught a glimpse of the 1:00 time on the DVD player. So it was going to be a late lazy breakfast/lunch…he couldn't care less.
There were a lot of important things that needed to be discussed and digested today. Many things with them now that they needed to establish and work through. Absently, Edward ran his fingertips over the bandage on his forearm, memories of the earlier part of last night flooding his mind.
As happy as he was now…as sure as he was of his love for Jasper, they needed to talk. They needed to think about the what and why of James, of how he was going to move beyond his turbulent past and come to a place of peace.
Absently, Edward wandered into his kitchen.
Setting about, he began chopping scallions and dicing pancetta, mind flowing around the possibilities of this new frontier he was facing.
Could he do this?
Edward was such a…for lack of better term, innocent. He didn't know the first thing about this kind of life, about how Jasper lived it, and could barely wrap his mind around the idea of being incarcerated. In his world, growing up, the only hardships you had were grades, money, making friendships last and the simple day to day struggles that everyone faced. The nitty gritty picture Jasper had confessed to him had only existed in movies and TV for him but last night…when James had been standing a hairs breath away from him, pure violence shining in his eyes…when Jasper had nearly killed a man with his bare hands…when he had sobbed out his story of pain and corruption and barbarity to him … it all rushed into reality.
And now in the light of day after all they had shared Edward questioned whether or not this was something he was ready for?
He had always been an 'all or nothing' sort of person and he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he loved Jasper fiercely and wanted to do everything he could to make him happy. But was it enough? Could he manage to be strong enough to hold this man up when all forces seemed to conspire to want to make him topple?
For the first time in his life, standing in his world, Edward felt completely naive and almost silly. Here he was in his pink bubble, everything beautiful and sparkly and what did he know about the real lives of others? Of this realm, he knew nothing about and was about to plunge head dead into, to save someone he loved? What could a person standing in a pink bubble do?
Stopping his cooking, Edward paused and sighed closing his eyes, seeking something of an answer. Some way to make himself believe in himself that he could do this.
When all else failed to give him confidence he often drew strength from the wisdom of others in his life. He was certain that Seth was one of the smartest people he knew and his mother, of course, was a vast well of insight. But more often than not it was Bella, well read and versed in all things witty and discerning that lent him a hand. What would she say here? Usually Bella would answer in some proverb like way…something like, "Often what we think is the problem is actually the solution."
So what was his problem here? His pink bubble? His lack of street smarts? So if Edward saw it Bella's way, should he say that the very things that made him opposite of the situation would actually be his greatest value? That the pink glittery bubble was something good and strong in its own way?
And just like that it dawned on him.
Maybe being the way he was, his lack of tainted life and all would be the very thing that kept Jasper from falling! Maybe he could not hide Jasper away from the nastiness of his past but build him up with everything he knew. Of beauty and goodness and let him see what the world could be like through pink glittery glasses! And maybe just maybe one day Jasper would be able to stand on his own against the stains of his memories.
Edward felt a new hope rise within him, felt a strength and power he had never known before course through his veins. He may not be able to fight like Jasper or growl his way through a situation but…he was Edward Cullen. He was smart and resourceful and he could cook and loved life and movies and music and his family! And he loved…loved loved loved…Jasper Whitlock. And that alone was more like a weapon than any knife or gun would ever be.
And so what if he lived in a pink bubble? Glenda the Good Witch lived in one and she was pretty amazing herself…if it worked for Glenda then it would work for him too!
Faith restored even better than before, Edward let the magic that his kitchen could work spill over him, as he chopped and whisked his way into a frittata, a mess of scones, and his specially made sticky sweet baked bacon. Cooking always put him in the right frame of mind…some people did yoga to center themselves, others ran or meditated but Edward made homemade pasta and chocolate mousse cake when he needed to work through something.
Right as the bacon was coming out of the oven, its smoky scent wafting around his nose, he heard a soft grunt behind him. Turning, baking tray in hand, Edward smiled warmly at the sight that greeted his eyes.
Jasper stood at the door to the kitchen in nothing (he was positive) but his washed out faded blue jeans, feet and chest bare, hair all soft and fluffy curls from the shower earlier, and his eyes still sleepy but almost…shy?
"Good morning!" Edward said sweetly, setting the sizzling bacon tray down and stepping closer to him.
Jasper ducked his head, but grinned all the same, "Mornin' Edward."
Edward couldn't help but notice how adorably bashful he seemed, not afraid but certainly tip toeing around something. He watched as the tall man played with his fingers, the splay of scars bunching and moving with the chiseled muscle underneath. It was amazing to him to think that this man who had been a gang leader, and an ex con was standing in his kitchen self-conscious and vulnerable over the initial awkwardness of a 'morning after'. Briefly Edward wondered how often when Jasper would have sex, was he put in this situation.
He waited patiently and moments later, Jasper stumbled out, "I would…really like ta' kiss ya' good mornin'…is tha' ok?"
Heart near bursting with joy, Edward slid forward, and pressed himself against his lovers warm body, noting how his whole form seemed to relax as soon as their skin touched. Oven mitts still on, he took both of Jaspers cheeks in his hands and whispered, "You can kiss me anytime you want, love." And pressed his lips into his, smiling at the groan that left his southern boy's mouth.
In a little time, they were curled up on the oversized wing chair, Edward cradled in Jasper's lap as he fed them fork fulls of a pancetta and goat cheese Frittata, warm basil and sundried tomato scones and sticky and salty and sweet smoked bacon, washing it down with swishes of strong black coffee. Their skin was warm and smooth against each other and Jasper's whispers and tickling kisses, and Edward's soft giggles left a glow around the two. They were wrapped up in the indulgent afterglow of discovering affection and it cocooned them in a gentle haze.
Jasper ran his hands along Edward's thigh, and he sighed at the feeling of those rough fingers along the light hair. It felt…incredible to be cuddled like this, and even better were the soft kisses he would place on his neck or the way his eyes turned lazy and adoring as Edward fed him.
"Is it good?" he asked after another bite of scone.
Jasper chewed and smiled down at him, "It's always good… I don't ever remember it not bein'…you're the best cook I know."
"Oh and you have known many other cooks?" he teased him while taking a nibble of bacon.
He blushed and looked down through bang covered eyes. "Naw…I may know a lot of people but I ain't never met anyone like ya' before." His gaze was slightly reflective and he reached a hand down and cupped his cheek, stroking his thumb over the skin.
Thinking about the people he seemed to know and how he certainly was not like them at all, Edward sighed a little and whispered, "No, I imagine I am very different."
Jasper said nothing so he continued, "Not right now…but we need to talk about a lot of things Jasper. What happened last night…even if it brought us finally together…I need to know more. I have to know what I am dealing with when it comes to your past."
He felt Jasper stiffen and the voice that came from him was strained and sad, "I understand if…lookin' back now…ya' wanna send me on mah way. I have a lot of shit ta' tangle with an' I want ya' ta' be sure…tha' ya want me." He paused and Edward sensed that he needed to get this out, "I was layin' in your bed this mornin' and how…I am pretty sure James won't be back, but how there is…a whole shit more wrong with me, Edward…I ain't a good man, I told ya' tha'. I am dancin' on the edge of somethin' ugly an' you might be the only thing that's keepin' me back. An' it might be enough I think…I wanna be good for ya'. I wanna do this right here every mornin' an' kiss ya' an' hold ya' like this…." He ran his hands down Edward's bare chest making him shiver at the deep tone that elapsed his voice, "An' I wanna touch ya' everywhere…an' make ya cry out mah name when I'm fuckin' ya'…I wanna be it all for ya, Edward…but I don't know if I can be tha'…" his voice trailed off and he looked down despondently.
Edward cocked his head to the side and brought his fingers up into the long curls turning his face to look at him. Those blue eyes were shiny with the rawness of his emotions and he was willing to bet that this Jasper he was seeing had never breathed life before until this moment.
"Now you listen to me Jasper Whitlock," he said firmly, "And you listen good and remember what I am about to say here. I may be able to get it all the time why something hurts you or makes you sad…I don't know what it is like to know the world the way you have…I couldn't imagine it. But I want to do this Jasper…I want it all. You give me all you have and don't you ever hide from me. I might not always understand your past or the things you had to do or why you had to do them…But one thing I do understand is that I love you…isn't that worth giving us a try? I want to hold you too!" he smiled up at him, "And cook for you and make you happy and kiss you and do all sorts of naughty things to your dick." That caused them both to laugh and Jasper's cheeks to tinge pink. He was still so shy about these things.
The mood lightened and Edward smiled at his Jasper, "We will figure it out hon…don't worry. Now finish your bacon…I am feeling the need to seduce you afterwards."
Jasper chuckled and picked up the last piece of the crispy meat. "I never woulda thought if ya' were tryin' ta make me horny with food ya' would use somethin' like this salty bacon. I mean it's good an' all but… ain't ya supposed ta be all about the whip cream and chocolate an' stuff?"
Edward watched as he stuffed the piece of bacon in his mouth, then grasped the retreating fingers in his own. He brought Jasper's hand to his lips and whispered mischievously, "Oh…I have always thought that sex was a savory pursuit." He stuck his tongue out and licked the tip of Jasper's pointer finger letting the taste of his bad boy and the salty bacon linger. Jasper's breath caught in a gasp.
"Sweet things are nice…but sex to me is better suited for the salty taste bud… after all…what about us is really actually sweet?" He sat up and straddled Jasper's waist grabbing his own last bacon piece and quickly eating it. Jasper smirked.
"An' here I thought ya loved chocolate?" he drawled enjoying the sexy way Edward eyed him.
"I do, of course…but chocolate is romantic…sex is…salty…savory…" he felt himself stir in his boxer briefs as the thoughts turned from playful to something more.
"After all skin," he leaned down and kissed his shoulder, "Is salty…Sweat is very salty…" there was a light sheen on his chest and Edward drew a line up along it. Jasper's breathing deepened and he ran his hands through Edward's hair. "And cum…" Edward reached down a hand and ran it over his southern boy's growing erection. "Cum is very, very salty…and tasty…"
Jasper groaned and couldn't help thrusting upwards towards the hand rubbing him through his jeans.
"Ya' keep doin' tha' then I suggest ya' put tha' nice plate down… Don't wanna break it." Without breaking eye contact, Edward moved the empty dish to the side table and sat staring at Jasper, his gaze heavy and filling with lust. He was overwhelmed at the feel and taste of his man, swirling with the joy of a full stomach and the salty remains of breakfast. Jasper placed both his hands on Edward's hips guiding them to begin grinding as his lips took his own, in a kiss that seemed to make him burn hotter than before.
"I love touchin' ya' Edward." Jasper breathed against his mouth. "I love the way ya' taste…like something good always…an' I love the way ya' feel in my hands…your skin…an' your hair…an' your cock." He groaned at his words and at the way he began to stroke along his back and paint his face with kisses with licks.
"Jasper!" Edward gasped out as his rough mechanic fingers found the globes of his ass, kneading the flesh and spreading the checks to dip a finger along his crack.
"I want it again…I need it again. I need ta' have ya' around me Edward…" He growled in his ear before scooping him up in his arms and striding to the bedroom.
The sheets felt cool against his heated skin when Jasper all but tossed him on the mattress. Even better was when Jasper spooned himself behind him and buried his head in his shoulder, long body lean and hard against his back.
Craning his head back for a kiss, Edward moaned at the feeling of Jasper rolling his hips against his ass, dick slick with precum and sliding along his body…marking him. It felt so good…so very, very good.
"Please…get inside me, please," he heard himself begging as he reached for the condoms and lube. Jasper slicked himself up and in a matter of moments, he had Edward on his side, still spooned against him, pulling his leg up against his stomach and his torso drawn up over him. His eyes never wavered….
They were so full… of so many things he had said and so many things he couldn't yet say…at least out loud.
"I don't wanna hurt ya…are ya…?"
Edward reached an arm up and back and brought their lips together before he could finish.
"I am still so full from you…" he whispered into the kiss, and his eyes spoke volumes in how much he wanted this. Now.
Jasper growled and moved his hips forward, and Edward felt the burn and initial pain of being taken…but he was too overwhelmed to care. In this moment, at the look of pure bliss on Jasper's face, in the way he stirred his body along his, the movements strong and possessive, but also speaking of the love and tenderness he knew was there. This was more than just a morning romp…this was Jasper's way of telling him that he wanted this and wanted to try...to try them.
That thought that maybe, just maybe, he had gotten through to him was enough to send Edward spiraling over the edge into the abyss of pleasure, Jasper not far behind him.
XxXxXxXxXx
It was Christmas Eve today.
Jasper could remember growing up and barely registering that the holiday even went by. It had been nothing but a change in atmosphere for him. A different kind of commercial on TV, another reason to be annoyed with mainstream America. In prison…when life truly caught up with him, that's when it hurt something awful. It was when the rest of the world…even behind bars seemed to move on past the men that society had written off. Of course some of the other inmates got visits from their families but for the majority of them, those on the outside did not want to remember those who had fallen into the pit of hell. To make matters worse, when the guards and staff were fucking jolly and merry and shit and the damn carols floating through the cracks in his cell… it just made bitter men all the more cynical. Kind words were rarely exchanged but in the December months it was even more hostile.
One of the hardest things about being in a prison was the knowledge that the world was happy and at peace…while you fought for the right to simply walk past a section of the exercise yard without getting shanked or raped. So many times, during the sleepless nights of reflection, of watching the violence that surround him and doing to others before they did to him made him want the days of his life to end…of being afraid of what would happen when they did end…of just fear and hurt and pain. But as much as his mind wished it, Jasper made it through Christmas after Christmas… seven of them behind bars becoming an animal. He had lived when he hadn't wanted to.
But maybe that had been his Christmas present then? Not getting killed in some horrible way when he had been locked up.
Because if he had been killed….he never would have been sitting in his shitty apartment watching of all things a Christmas movie about an angel coming down and showing a man that he meant something to the world he lived in. He never would have had his own angel come and do the very same thing for him.
Jasper knew that if he would have succumb to the all the evil around him he wouldn't be standing at that cross walk, in his new clothes, that his lover had helped him pick out. He wouldn't be aching from their love making, from the joy of being inside the man who had dragged him from the gutter and shoved him into the light of day. He wouldn't be thinking about going to have a family Christmas Eve dinner tonight…he wouldn't be going to buy a gift for Edward.
But somehow he was…Jasper Whitlock, the son of a drunk and a meth head, the ex-member of a gang of ruthless drug dealers, the man who fought his way through the Texas Prison system, was about to start a new life.
He was going to be a good man.
Jasper smiled as he crossed the busy street, thinking back to yesterday to the love and the food and the laughter he had finally been part of. He wanted to race home and cuddle his Red Head close and never let him go. They had talked about so much…shared so much yesterday.
He knew now that for as long as Edward wanted him in his life he would be there…James and all of his past shit would be dealt with if the time came…but now all he wanted to do was buy Edward a Christmas present that would begin to say to him what the man longed to hear…an 'I love you' gift.
Whether it be by fate or not, Jasper's time to deal came sooner than he expected. As he rounded the corner he caught sight of the dark figure up head between two buildings…waiting…watching through bloodshot eyes. His throat, raw and exposed, gleamed to Jasper like a light and he felt a primitive swelling of pride at the thought that he had done this to the man who not only had stolen his freedom but had attempted to harm his mate.
Bringing himself to full height Jasper followed the direction down the alley where James nodded his head towards.
He had to finish this once and for all.
The two men stood facing one another bodies' tense ready to pounce should the need arise. He could see the wary way James eyed him now, some of his fire and cockiness replaced by the feeling of that knife he had held at his neck yesterday. Jasper kept his gaze cool and simply waited for what was to come.
After what seemed like forever, James spoke, "You aren't the same Jasper I put in prison all those years ago are you?" his voice held staunch resolve, "You are a stronger more violent man than I ever thought you could be. It was…" he chuckled absently running a hand over his scabbing wound. "Exciting to say the least to watch you become what you were meant to be…a man who would so easily kill again."
James' eyes were alight with madness. "We could be great Jasper! We could build an empire together and do…"
Jasper held up his hand silencing him, "I told ya' once James an' I'll say it this last time…I am done. I want nothin' ta' do with tha' life an' ya'. I am strong enough ta' walk away…look at your self…ya' are nothing but a nut with ambition…where are the others James? Where is Peter an' Laurent? Where is Marcus an' Benjamin? Where did they all go James? Ya' are nothin' now…they all saw ya' fer what ya' were an' left...don't lie ta' me, I know tha' ya' are alone." James face was a mask of embarrassment and rage. "An' ya need me…the Major ta' get em' back for ya'…so ya' can be big shit again…" He spat on the ground at his feet. Steely resolve finally curled around Jaspers body and he knew now more than ever he was ready to say goodbye to this part of himself.
"I shoulda killed ya' yesterday for what ya' did…but I think tha' the cruelest thing I can do is let ya' live….and waste away ta' the nothing that ya' are."
"It's that fucking faggot that put you up to this wasn't it? He is the reason you are so blind to what you are right now! What you could be!" James was shaking with fury but Jasper just shook his head and turned to leave.
"We are done here James…I don't ever wanna see ya' again…Ya' may not be so lucky the next time ya' try anything on me or my boy."
And without another word Jasper about faced and walked out of that alley, leaving James in cold December snow.
Jasper didn't have time to wonder about his old leader. He had a new life to lead, a new vision of his future…and he was on a mission to get Edward the best present he could.
He never saw James's frantic eyes, the way he pulled at his hair in agony or the way he muttered a single phrase out of his mouth, over and over again…
"Faggot Edward…fag fag fag…"
I would love some feedback on this chapter! Thank you all!