A/N: I would like to note that I am not bashing Wilson in this chapter. Mary just does not like him for story reasons.

What Is Her Agenda?

Mary knocked on House's door and he let her in. "I thought maybe you would like to go to lunch," she said to him.

"Trying to butter me up?" House asked jokingly.

"Will it work?" Mary joked back.

"It better be a really nice lunch," House said. "That means there better be strippers at the restaurant."

"Good thing I cashed all my money into singles," Mary said.

"We should bring my friend Wilson," House said. "I don't know the last time he saw a naked woman that wasn't in a magazine."

"I met your friend Wilson downstairs and I can understand why he might not get too many dates."

"He might not get many dates, but he marries the ones that will date him," House said. "What did he do to you that has you already running from him?"

"He practically interrogated me downstairs about my proposition to you," Mary said. "Thanks for telling people by the way."

"Wilson is obsessed with my personal life," House said. "If I don't tell him this stuff, he pouts. The interrogation was probably more to see why on earth anyone would choose me to be the father of their baby."

"You are a great choice," Mary said. "If he doesn't see that, he isn't a very good friend."

"I am not a very good friend either, so I guess that makes us even."

"You are a great friend," Mary said. "Let's go to lunch. I'm buying."

"Those are the words that I love to hear," House said as he got up.

"Let me carry your bag for you," Mary said.

"I could get used to this butt-kissing thing. If you keep being so nice to me and doing things for me, I might just go live with you and lay around the house all day and I can be your baby," House said.

"How about I still have a kid and then you can be my babysitter?" Mary said with a smile as they walked out into the hallway. Wilson and Cuddy were standing in the clinic when they saw House and Mary coming towards them.

"Who is the woman with Wilson that is staring at us openly?" Mary asked.

"That's my boss," House said. "They must be having gossip time."

"I wonder what they could be talking about," Mary said rolling her eyes.

"How much she wants me," House said.

"Really?" Mary asked a little stunned.

"Everybody knows," House joked. "I think she also wants me to be her baby's daddy. She also just might want the sex."

"Do you like her?" Mary asked.

"You would have to be gay not to want to hit that."

"You two going to lunch now?" Wilson asked them as they walked by.

"She is buying, so I don't need you to come," House said.

Cuddy stuck her hand out to Mary. "I'm Dr. Lisa Cuddy."

"Hello," Mary said as she gave Cuddy a quick hand shake.

"You can come Cuddy if afterwards you and me swing by your house," House said.

"I need to talk to you during lunch," Mary quickly said. "Maybe another time." She headed for the exit and House followed.

"Did you see that?" Wilson asked Cuddy. "She seemed jealous of you."

"Why would she be jealous of me?" Cuddy asked. "I am not dating House and I am not planning on having children with him."

"Maybe she wants House to herself and she thinks that you are a threat," Wilson said.

"If she wants House to herself, I don't think the way to get him is to become pregnant," Cuddy said. "If anything, he would probably run as far away as possible."

"We just assume that," Wilson said. "What if finding out he is a father makes House get nicer? It might actually show that he is human."

"And then he will fall in love with Mary?" Cuddy asked.

"You know House gets obsessed with things easily," Wilson said. "If she has known House for awhile, she probably knows that too and if he gets obsessed with his kid, he will spend more time with her."

"I hope House knows what he is doing," Cuddy said.

**********

Mary drove House in her car. "Your boss sure wears some skanky clothes," Mary said.

"I know," House said. "I love my job."

"I guess we know how she got her job. A lot of guys probably noticed her too."

"Cuddy is too anal to sleep her way to the top," House said. "Also, for a woman that dresses like that, she surprisingly does not get a lot of sex."

"And you know this how?"

"She has that sex drought attitude," House said. "I have offered to end the drought many times for her, but she keeps turning me down."

"I thought you said that she wanted you," Mary said. "Wouldn't she have taken you up on your offer?"

"She is just playing hard to get," House said. "I know she thinks of me in the shower."

"You should go out with someone who really likes you," Mary said. "She might just end up using you."

"I think I could handle Lisa Cuddy using me," House said.

"At least after she is done using you, she can fire you and you can come work at my hospital. We used to have a lot of fun together."

"We sure did," House said. "Remember the time we super glued everything to the Dean's assistant's desk. Man was she pissed."

"I miss times like that," Mary said. "I don't work with anyone with a good sense of humor anymore."

"Just wait a couple of months and maybe I will get fired. I haven't done that in awhile."

"You can come work in the diagnostics department with me," Mary said. "If I get pregnant, I will need someone to replace me when I am on maternity leave."

"You would give me the honor of harassing your fellows?" House asked. "You are so kind. Know if only I could think of a way to bring my team with me. I already have them trained."

"If you did come work with me, you could spend time with your kid if you wanted to."

"Why would you want me to spend anytime with your kid?" House asked. "Didn't you see the way I turned out?"

"You would not be like your father," Mary said. "I am sure that you would be a great father."

"For me to be a great father, the kid would need a great mother," House said.

"I guess the kid should be lucky to have me as a mother than," Mary said with a smile.

"I said a great mother," House said dodging her punch. Mary knew that she would be a great mother and with a little help, House could be a great father and husband.