Made of Fail

Chapter Eight
Chunin Exams
Part One

It was a Friday, and Kuro and Sara were at the Bar. Sara had told Kuro that not much was known by many about the Bar – it didn't even have a name – but it was an unspoken rule that only ninja who'd gone through the 'rite of passage' were able to drink there. It had been a hard day, and Kuro's old memories were beginning to float to the surface – she didn't want to drown her sorrows in alcohol, especially since her family was genetically predisposed to have her become an alcoholic, but a drink and a talk was just what she needed.

"There was this one time," Kuro said, her eyes clouding over as she reminisced, "that my daddy told me he'd gone to Japan and he'd seen these cakes and pies in the windows. He looked at them and asked Koda-san, his friend, how the places were able to afford to put food in their windows. He'd replied, to Daddy's shock, that the food was made of plastic. This was back in the day that America didn't do this, remember.

"So my daddy came back home, after a few decades, married my mommy, you know the drill. Anyway, on one of their dates, the dessert tray came out. My daddy looked at the cakes in wonder and reached out to touch one, exclaiming, 'Oh, this looks so real!'" There was a pause as Kuro took another sip of her drink. "His hand went right through it. It wasn't made of plastic." Sara chuckled and shook her head. "Your family's so weird, Ro."

It was then that they heard an angry voice speak.

"Why the hell is there some brat in this bar?" a woman asked angrily. Kuro and Sara – heck, most of the bar patrons – turned to look at the woman. She wore a chain-mail one-piece with a skirt and a trench coat – Anko, Kuro realized immediately.

Anko walked up to Kuro. "Listen, kid, this place isn't for thirteen-year-olds. Go back to your mommy and let me drink in peace." At the casual mention of her mother, Kuro got angry. This, coupled with the alcohol in her system, made her lash out.

"Listen, you fucking bitch," she said viciously. "I'm not fucking thirteen. I'm seventeen. And I fucking like sake. I don't have any fucking parents to go fucking home to, and I'm having a hard fucking day. I fucking threatened to cut that fucking asshole's balls off," she pointed to the bouncer, "so I have as much fucking right to be here as you do. Sit the fuck down, shut the fuck up, and drink."

Anko stared at her for a minute, struggling to comprehend the cursing coming out of this little girl's – no, she was seventeen – mouth. Then she grinned. "I like you," she chirped, sitting down on the stool next to her. "What's your name?"

"Kuro. Yours?"

"Anko." It was the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Anko fit right in with the rest of the family, and she especially liked Jūgo, constantly giving him hugs and dragging him places with her. "He's just too cute!" she'd often say, a wicked gleam in her eye.

On March twenty-fourth, Fū, Kimimaro, and Haku had graduated at the top of their classes, Kimimaro being Rookie of the Year, with Fū and Haku in third and second, respectively. The three were put on their own team, despite their grades, simply because of the age difference between themselves and their classmates. They were put under the tutelage of, of all people, Maito Gai. The test was simple, as the three worked together as a team, said a couple of things about 'youth', and the guy was all over them.

Fū had gotten to be friends with Shino, who was going to be starting at the Academy soon, and the two often trained together. His dodging skills were certainly up to par.

Naruto and Kuro had gotten even closer through all this, and he'd even let her give her a kiss on his forehead rather than just the usual hug. This marked a new stage in their relationship, and Kuro began to train him.

In April, Kuro turned sixteen, but another thing had happened, too – Kuro had found a ninken of her own. It was quite by accident, but everyone knew how the Forest of Death could get. Her ninken was a Bay Cat and Kuro had put a navy blue bandanna around her neck with the Yin clan symbol on it.

Soon it was time for the Chūnin Exams to begin – Kuro and Utakata, who'd also become a ninja, had been put with another genin named Jinta, whose teammates had already become chūnin. He was a bit immature, but reliable, and Kuro and Utakata were able to work with him.

The trip to Suna was uneventful, and the kids were being taken care of back at home. The Aburame clan, surprisingly, had offered to take in Fū for the duration of the Exams, and Kuro, baffled, had asked why. Shibi had kept silent, and Kuro, seeing as how she wasn't going to get an answer, simply shrugged and said that it was up to Fū whether she wanted to go – she'd agreed immediately. Jūgo had been taken in by Anko, and Rōshi had stayed with Kimimaro. He'd also promised to play with and keep an eye on Naruto.

As Kuro reached the gates to Sunagakure and went through customs, her mind was whirling. She was eager to find Tarantu and never let her go again. As soon as she could, she gave her team the slip, saying that she needed to find her sister. Utakata and Jinta had shrugged and agreed, as did their team sensei – so she hurried off to find her best friend.

Kuro hurried along the streets, her eyes kept peeled for anyone familiar. So far she'd found a couple of stores, a nondescript bar (she'd have to check that one out later), and a clothing store. She wasn't interested in the clothing (she'd brought along a breathable white desert poncho, so she was cool), but filed it away for future reference anyway. As she turned a corner, she saw a flash of brown hair. Hurrying towards it, she watched as the person turned her head to look at something – then she grinned.

"Tarantu!" she called and the girl turned towards her in surprise. "Kuro?"

"The one and only!" She laughed and ran up to her friend, embracing her fiercely – the hug was returned just as exuberantly. "I missed you," Tarantu said softly, and Kuro nodded her assent. The two began to catch up on the happenings, and Kuro learned that Tarantu had been training hard, having given her vow to protect the three children she saw as her own, while Tarantu learned that Kuro had developed a taste for alcohol. She also met Kuro's ninken, the Bay Cat.

"What's her name?" Kuro shrugged. "She doesn't have one. I see no point." Tarantu twitched. "You're not naming her? Why?"

"Names are simply words that you associate with another being. Whenever you think of that being, you think, 'oh, that's such-and-such' and leave it at that. Without names, she and I have a stronger bond because we don't communicate using words that only get in the way. It's almost a Buddhist-like way of thinking." Tarantu nodded in understanding and left it at that, although she did admonish her friend from drinking – even though Sara did trick her into doing it.

Kuro simply shrugged. "At least I'm not smoking, gambling, or having sex," she said cheerfully.

Tarantu took Kuro to the house to visit Yashamaru and Gaara and meet Kankurō and Temari. As she passed through the hallways, following closely behind her sister, she looked around at the place in awe – the Kazekage's house was damn impressive!

"Okā-san!" a child's voice called, and muffled footsteps came their way. Kuro and Tarantu turned towards the voice to see Gaara running towards them. He looked at Kuro with a grin. "Kuro onē-san!" he said in surprise. "You're visiting?" With a laugh, Kuro nodded. "Yes," she said. "I'm here for the Chūnin Exams."

"Okā-san is in the Exams, too," he said sagely – or as sagely as a five-year-old can get, anyway, "so you're probably going to have to fight her." Kuro seemed to deflate slightly at this, but she smiled anyway. "Yeah, probably," she agreed. "But right now, I'm just glad that I can see her again. It's been too long. And you too, Gaara-chan! How've you been?"

With a wide smile, Gaara began to chatter away about how he was training hard, and one day he was going to be Kazekage! He also mentioned that the beetle Fū had given him had grown bigger and had begun to fight alongside him – he was also able to send images through it to Fū like she was able to do to his. By following the instructions in Kuro's letter, he'd been able to unlock more of his beetle's secrets.

For example, before, the images Fū had sent him were grainy, short, and blurry at best, and all he had were the visuals – there was no sound at all. He also couldn't communicate with his beetle, nor could he send clips of his own through the insect – now he could communicate with Fū by using the beetle as a sort of mental video phone.

But he wasn't just limited to sending messages to Fū, no – he could send images to any of the other beetles she'd given to the other jinchūriki: Han, Nī, Killer Bee, Rōshi, Naruto, and Utakata.

The beetle had grown as well – now it was as big as a puppy, and Gaara carried it around in a sort of messenger bag thrown over his shoulder, though it also liked to ride on his head. He had also recently decided to name it – it was Sui, written with the kanji for 'water'.

As Gaara spoke they continued to walk and eventually met up with Temari and Kankurō. Soon, however, Kuro needed to leave, though she promised to spend more time with her.

Utakata, Jinta, and her team sensei had checked into a pretty damn nice hotel – Kuro had a room all to herself, as the boys were sharing another room. With a sigh, Kuro stepped out onto the roof and rubbed her eyes. She hated sleeping alone – after all this time sleeping in the same bed, or at least the same room, with her family, the sensation of being completely alone in her own room was…empty. All in all, she didn't like it.

Suddenly her eyes gained a sort of maniacal glint to them and she jumped back inside before making a shadow clone to spend the night – or at least until she fell asleep, anyway. After all, what better company can one keep than oneself?

Back in Konoha, it was a different story.

Fū stood in front of the Aburame clan compound, suddenly full of trepidation. Although she liked Shibi and Shino, she was very, very wary of meeting new people in the first place, despite her actions suggesting the contrary. She scooted over until she was behind Shibi – she didn't exactly trust him completely (at least not yet) but she had enough faith in his abilities to protect her should the situation call for it. She knew that it wasn't logical in the least bit to hide behind a man who she didn't fully trust, but being a fellow bug user, she understood him on a more instinctual level – that and he simply seemed to exude serenity and calm, she couldn't help but want him as her wall.

Shibi glanced at the girl who'd hidden behind him and decided to ignore it, though he did file it away in the back of his mind for further examination later on before leading the girl into the clan compound.

A few of the Aburame who were out wordlessly glanced at her, confused for a moment as to why there was a little non-Aburame child in their compound, but ignored it after a nearly undetectable warning look from their kumichō, their clan leader.

Shibi led Fū directly to his house and let her inside. As soon as she caught sight of Shino (whom she already trusted, even more than Shibi), she ran up to him and drop-tackled him to the ground. "Shino!" she chirped, clutching his midsection. The boy lay on the floor for a moment before lifting his head and looking down at Fū, a slight hint of pink on his cheeks. "Fū-san?"

The orange-eyed girl pouted. "Oi, Shino, I told you not to be so distant! Just call me Fū!" Shino simply nodded, making her pout. It seemed that every time she got near him, he'd clam up and wouldn't talk in that adorable way of his – she'd pointed it out to him once, but all he did was shrug, although she saw a hint of pink on his cheeks before he turned away. Yes, Shino was weird, but in a cute way that she couldn't resist poking and prodding.

The Aburame compound had never before seen such a flurry of activity within their walls. The tanned girl had taken to running around the place, looking at and investigating anything and everything, dragging a complying Shino in tow. A few had wondered why, exactly, their kumichō had brought a stranger here in the first place, never mind that fact that she was currently running around with his son, but they simply chose to watch for now.

The girl was a chatterbox, talking at such a rapid pace that Shino found it hard to keep up, especially with her odd way of saying things. He did catch the gist, though, and so far her ramblings had jumped from her mother's and elder brother's participation in the Chūnin Exams in Suna to a kid named Gaara who was just like her (he couldn't help a mild spike of jealousy at this) to psychic beetles to insects to jutsu. Currently, she was talking about plants.

Shino…quite honestly didn't know what he saw in her sometimes. He didn't understand, at his age, that his father was trying to manipulate the two together, but he did understand that his father had been acting strangely around him, asking him about Fū, and now inviting her over. He'd gone through several hypotheses, but none of them worked. It was understandable, though – a child could not unravel the plots of an adult Aburame, even if the child was an Aburame as well.

Even so, he did understand that she was the very first person outside or his clan who had actually become his friend – usually, the Aburame kept away from the rest of the populace, and the rest of Konoha's citizens kept away from them as well in an unspoken mutual agreement. However, despite their quiet natures, the Aburame as a clan was more inter-connected than the Inuzuka – while the Inuzuka were pack-minded, they were ruled by their emotions. Aburame were taught to think logically and quash their emotions to have better control over their hives – hives that were controlled by their emotions in the first place. If the emotion was strong enough, the kikaichū would act in accordance, despite the user's wishes. If the emotions weren't in the way, or were subtle enough to pulse just beneath the surface, they couldn't get in the way of clan relationships.

Because of their innate skill in hiding their emotions, Aburame were often seen as the perfect ninja.

Although these lessons had been drilled into Shino's head ever since he was old enough to understand them, he was still a child and had less control over his emotions as an adult would. This was often seen in his inability to deal with the less logically-inclined people – how could they not act as maturely as he did? Didn't they know how to be more emotionally composed? He'd seen adults get so angry it was comical, and this grated on his nerves. They were acting like uncivilized barbarians! How were they even considered mentally competent?

And yet, through all this, Shino saw something special in Fū – she didn't get comically angry like those angry men and women, and although she showed a lot of emotion, it was somehow more gentle and flowing than other people. Even so, there was a hint of rawness to it that attracted him to her like – for lack of a better term – a moth to a lamp. While he didn't yet know whether Fū would burn him in the end, she was just too tempting to befriend.

Elsewhere, Jūgo was silently observing Anko's way of life.

She lived in a normal-sized apartment in Konoha, with a rather Spartan décor. A single futon sat in the corner, and the place was a bit of a mess, with scrolls and clothes lying everywhere. Anko, who had dragged him to her flat, was currently grinning from ear to ear. "This is my place!" she chirped. "It's a bit messy, but that's because I was feeling lazy. C'mon! I don't want to have to stay in this place all day, it's boring!" And with that, she dragged him off to do something else.

Jūgo kept his face soft and blank as Anko dragged him through Konoha, doing random things. He noticed that everyone pretty much ignored her, although one or two men had been either brave or stupid enough to give her the once-over – she was wearing pretty skimpy clothes. Even so, it probably should've been obvious that if you looked at her the wrong way (or stared at her for too long), she'd kill you. And she'd make it slow and painful.

He honestly didn't understand why she showed off her body like that – neither Okā-san, nor Fū imōto, nor Sara onē-san showed off their bodies like that, and they even went to great lengths just to hide it. Of course, there were a lot of things he didn't understand – why anyone would want to be a ninja and kill people, for one.

Jūgo honestly hated hurting others. His alter-ego was a curse in and of itself – for someone as peaceful as he, knowing that there was another part of him that reveled in bloodshed was sickening. And unlike Utakata onī-san, Rōshi ojī-san, and Fū imōto, he couldn't control it. He didn't even have the satisfaction of knowing that this part of him was a completely different being – this damned alter-ego was a part of him, a part he kept locked up as much as possible.

Even so, he tried to live an honest life. He worked on Haruo-san's farm and got a small salary as well as invaluable knowledge of the land. Haku's father was really a good man, and whenever he saw him with Kasumi he couldn't help but smile, even though he often wondered how he could ever get that kind of relationship – how could he ever love someone when a dark part of him wanted nothing more than to rip him to shreds?

At least, he would remind himself during these times, he had a family. He had a mother who loved him despite his other half, a little sister who loved nothing more than to play with him, a brother with whom he was so comfortable the two could simply sit in silence, saying nothing, and a grandfather who was there whenever he needed help controlling his darkness. Not to mention, he also had a completely insane elder sister who loved to simply chatter, another elder sister who was currently dragging him everywhere, an elder brother who liked to mess with people's heads (usually by making them think he was a girl before telling them he was a boy), and another elder brother who he could always go to for calm, sage advice and had a strange obsession of using bubbles while fighting.

Yes, life was good for him if he let himself forget about his other side – it was a testament to his disassociation with it that he hadn't even bothered to give it a name – but even so, those niggling doubts still let themselves be known in one way or another.

Anko, meanwhile, was ecstatic. She absolutely adored Jūgo, and having the cute brat stay with her was extremely comforting. Recently, Orochimaru had tossed her aside like yesterday's garbage, finding no more use for her. He'd given this whole speech about how she was completely useless, and then dumped her on the side of the road for no reason other than to see her flounder. It was a slap in the face, she'd thought with satisfaction, that she'd been able to find her way to Konoha. She, along with the Sandaime, had spun a clever tale about how she'd been kidnapped before she'd finally been able to escape – although they never did release the name of the man who'd taken her away.

A few people were suspicious, but the majority either didn't care or commended her for her bravery. A few had connected the dots and realized that she was taken by Orochimaru, but the Hokage had make it clear that anyone who spoke about it was subject to punishment.

Since she'd been away all these years, it was hard to find anyone with whom she could simply talk (she had been working on Kurenai), but Kuro had utterly destroyed that problem, and now Jūgo was here to play with her!

Despite her social awkwardness (a trait she shared with pretty much every other ninja to walk this earth), she'd been able to make friends – although it was probably more correct to say that Kuro had made a friend out of her.

Kimimaro and Rōshi were acting like they usually did – Rōshi spent his time either relaxing or training Kimimaro, while Kimimaro spent his time either studying or being trained by Rōshi. Of course, had the other children been there Rōshi's training efforts would have expanded to fit all four children, and this included Jūgo – even if he didn't want to be a ninja, it didn't mean he would be able to stop protecting his precious people. However, they weren't there and therefore the point was moot.

Back in Kirigakure no Sato, a muscular man was standing in front of two children – one was Hōzuki Suigetsu, and the other was Chōjūrō – that he chose for the next generation of the Seven Swordsmen of the Hidden Mist. It was time for the day or reckoning.

"Alright," Zabuza said gruffly, taking out three swords – two, the Kiba, or Fangs, channeled lightning and were the sharpest swords in existence. He handed them to Suigetsu, who held them almost reverently. The Godaime Mizukage ignored this and turned his attention to Chōjūrō. The kid had potential, definitely, but his self-defeating attitude got damn annoying at times. The last sword was Hiramekarei, or the Flounder – it was able to create attacks using chakra. Zabuza gave this one to the boy, who fumbled with it for a minute before actually getting a hold on it, flushing slightly in embarrassment.

Kisame, who stood next to Zabuza, snorted. In the back of his mind, he'd expected a little more fanfare, but Zabuza wasn't that kind of person. He just got things over and done with. Kisame could appreciate that. After the disastrous mission where he'd killed the previous wielder of his beloved Samehada, or Shark Skin, he'd been about ready to run and never look back – he wanted to begin his own quest for the truth. But now that Zabuza was Mizukage, he decided to stick around for a bit. The reforms came immediately, and Kirigakure was changed into a village with actual morals!

Although he didn't care much for dramatizing things, Zabuza was probably the best thing to happen to Kiri – even though he was complete crap with politics. But that was a story for another time.

Kuro grinned as she walked through the doors to the area of the first test – she'd briefed Utakata on what to expect, and the teen didn't even bat an eyelid, not even asking how she got the information. Jinta, their other teammate, already knew what to expect, so Kuro told him nothing – she didn't want to play her cards too early after all.

The first test was quite similar to the one in Konoha, although the proctors were much, much stricter here – Kuro had just barely managed to cheat without being caught by working out something with Utakata beforehand. Utakata was currently playing with his bubbles – bubbles that allowed him a third eye over other test-takers. These same bubbles were also able to project things, such as answers to tests, on whatever they touched for a short amount of time – long enough so that the person would be able to trace over the answers and have them permanently written down. Jinta was helped in this way as well, since it wouldn't do for him to be the only person in their team to fail, and therefore bring them down with him.

As she waited out the remainder of the test, Kuro leaned over onto her test paper and got into a comfortable position, pondering what exactly she had become. Ever since she'd turned sixteen, her 'morals' had been steadily slipping away. She saw no need for morals, and she saw neither Good nor Evil, for she didn't believe in such childish fantasies.

In her mind, morals had come about due to the fact that they were ingrained in every complex animal species due to millions of years of evolution – those who didn't have morals or common sense to tell them what to do either lost mating rights or died off, making them stagnant genetic failures in the eyes of natural selection. Things such as Good or Evil only existed in the twisted ideologies of humans who failed to see things as they truly were, instead slapping a name tag on something and considering it 'solved'.

But such things didn't have names to begin with – Good, Evil, Dark, Light… Despite language playing a major role in communication and evolution in several species (including humans), it has made true understanding stagnate into infested pools of fixed thoughts and ideas. Did no one see the sky as what it was without fixing the label 'sky' to it? How does a child, unlearned in the art of language, see the sky? How does he see the trees? Language has made the human race more advanced, yet hopelessly more ignorant, than the rest of the animal kingdom.

Good and Evil were also simply pathetic human inventions made to keep people in line – sure, it kept homo sapiens as a whole one of the few surviving species, but the whole thing had gotten so complex and idiotic that Kuro had washed her hands of it. She had no morals, not any more. When she was younger, her older sister had told her that if she pointed her finger up at the sky, it meant that she hated God. Back then, she'd spent maybe a week fretting about it and keeping her hands at her sides until she completely forgot about it.

Now, however, that she'd grown, Kuro found herself peeling away, piece by piece, the very structure upon which humanity had been built. Soon it would come crumbling down, at least in her eyes. Heck, it had already started to crumble, and she'd just found herself picking at the edges of the crumbling human ideology in the beginning. Now she was in too deep to get out.

For Good or for Bad, Kuro found that she didn't really care.

She gently pushed herself out of her thoughts and focused her attention on the Proctor for the first Exam. He was trying to psyche them out by asking them 'the tenth question', but Kuro wasn't buying it, and neither did Utakata. Jinta didn't either, since he'd already been through the exams at least four times and knew what to expect. It ended with the Proctor saying that they'd all passed, and after several questions another Proctor entered to take them to the arena for the Second Test.

Kuro, having always had problems listening, unwittingly tuned her out – she had to ask Utakata what had been said, and Kuro, glad that she hadn't missed anything important, followed the Proctor with the rest of her team to the outskirts of a training area – a desert wasteland.

Tarantu had also passed the First Test with her teammates, Gīchi and Maiko. Now, however, was the hard part – to get them to accept her authority during the Second Test. The Second Test was traditionally a survival ordeal, and it was crucial that they had a team leader during this part. The problem was that they didn't seem to want to accept a team leader who actually had morals.

What did they care if they killed someone during this part of the test? What did they care if they crippled others? Certainly there were other things to think about than such trivial matters! By the gods above, were they ninja or weren't they?

Tarantu had much higher morals than those around her, it seemed – she was innocent, never even touching a drop of alcohol, much less having killed someone. She couldn't comprehend everyone's apathy to death and hurt around them. How could they watch without acting against it? How could they partake in the bloodshed?

Honestly, it seemed to her sometimes that she was the only sane one left.

To kill, she'd always been taught, especially to do so without remorse, made one a monster. To hurt someone just to see them cry was bad. To go against morality for no reason other than to go against it was Evil. Evil, that is, with a capital letter E.

Because she lived her life by the moral code and the Golden Rule, her teammates thought of her as a child, someone they shouldn't follow – but in her mind, they were the children. To do what they did for no other reason than they got paid… It was selfish, childlike behavior, and Tarantu was going to change it.

She was torn from her thoughts as the second Proctor explained the rules of the Second Test – the rules were quite simple, and mirrored the rules from the Naruto manga; get two scrolls and get to the tower. Now completely alert, Tarantu and her team walked behind a curtain to receive their scroll after signing a contract that if they died it wasn't Suna's fault, and yadda yadda yadda. However, unlike in Konoha, if a team were no longer able to participate then they'd have the option of sending up a flare so that a proctor would come get them. Apparently concessions had to be made by Suna to be able to let competitors participate in one of the harshest environments known to man.

Probably the strangest thing about the whole ordeal was that the training area where they'd be stuck for the next five days was a complete and total desert – there was no way to get water other than the water they gave you at the beginning of the test. A few of the smarter teams, namely those from Suna or Kuro's team, had brought their own water. The less-experienced teams were practically doomed from the start.

Tarantu, with a grin, walked over to Kuro, her own team in tow. "Kuro," she said quietly. "Do you want to team up? If we combine our talents and resources, we'll be formidable." Kuro, catching on, grinned and nodded. They told each other through which gates they should enter, and Kuro, having been extra-super sneaky, had Utakata copy down the map they'd been shown onto a piece of paper using his bubbles – after it had been traced and sealed for only their eyes, the team was ready to go.

Tarantu's team was to wait at their gate until they were found by Kuro's team, at which point they would meet up. Under normal circumstances neither team would've agreed, but Kuro and Tarantu were extremely close, and one would never betray the other, no matter what.

As the starting gong rang through the arena, Kuro led her team, which had started at Gate Sixteen, to Tarantu's team's gate, which was Gate Thirty-Two. Jinta had elected to carry the scroll, and Kuro had agreed.

The sun beat down on Kuro's team as they made their way around the perimeter of the area. All three of them had divided up the water equally – Kuro had made a fantastic seal that allowed one to see exactly how much water was left in their canteens, since the canteens held all of their water using a storage seal that would keep it full. It took maybe half the day to traverse the area, and while they hadn't met any teams along the way (since they stuck to the perimeter and all the opposing teams were in the middle), they only had four and a half days left to get another scroll.

When Kuro's team got there, Tarantu was extremely grateful. Maiko and Gīchi had bothered her the entire time about simply forgetting about it and going off on their own. It took several well-placed threats to keep them in line.

Tarantu hated making threats. They made her feel…unclean.

"All right," Kuro said. "I'm not going to ask what scroll you guys have – that stays secret. But we will be sharing the map. Tarantu, did you get my special canteens?"

"Yes, they work perfectly. We've also been using a technique that lets you stay hydrated by expelling body heat through chakra so that you don't need to sweat. It's not hard, but it takes a considerable amount of chakra." Kuro nodded. "Tarantu, am I correct in assuming that you're your team leader?"

"Yes."

"All right, you call the shots. I'll be your second." Tarantu looked a bit nervous at this, but nodded in acquiescence. She thought a moment. "All right," she said authoritatively. "I would suggest going to the middle and setting up traps there."

Kuro nodded. "And if we're ambushed by another team?" Tarantu stood silent at this before speaking slowly. "I…don't like direct confrontations," she admitted. "But if we have to, we're not using anything lethal, and we're setting up a flare so that someone will come help them. I don't want any unnecessary deaths on my hands.

"That being said, does anyone have any way of scoping out the area?" Utakata stepped forward. "I do," he said plainly. "I can use my bubbles to give me a birds' eye view of the area. What would you like me to be on the lookout for?"

"Any enemy teams," Tarantu said, apparently relieved. "We want to steer clear of them until we get to the middle." There was a moment's pause as Utakata reached into his jug of bubble solution and blew a bubble, which zoomed up and away from the group.

"We're in the clear," Utakata said. "Follow me and we won't bump into anyone." As soon as they started moving, Tarantu began to relax. It had been so freaking annoying earlier with Maiko whining about how stupid it was to team up with 'those Konoha weaklings'. At least now that they were together, Maiko wouldn't outwardly complain. Tarantu let Utakata take the lead, and fell back to talk with Gīchi, the resident trap-master, about the right kind of trap for their environment.

As the sun began to set over the horizon, the two teams continued along the way. On Tarantu's suggestion, they'd travel by night and sleep during the day. At night, Kuro would be their eyes, as she could see much better than they could in the dark. Since they didn't stop, however, Gīchi, Maiko, and Jinta were very tired by daybreak, though they at least reached the tower. Utakata set up camp underground with Gīchi's help, and a few sand traps. Then they went to sleep, with Kuro keeping watch.

Kuro sighed as she shifted positions. At the moment, she was hidden underground, keeping watch on the happenings above through Utakata's bubble jutsu, which he'd powered enough to stay active even as he slept. It had been two hours and not a single team had come by. As much as she'd rather simply find a team and beat the crap out of them, she'd told Tarantu that she was in charge. She wasn't stupid, but Tarantu was very kind and sweet. The life of a ninja was not the one for her. She simply wanted to be a medic-nin.

With a yawn, the brunette stretched and looked back into the bubble, her eyes half-closed. The entire affair had been quite understated, really, with no direct confrontations and no deaths. It was very…ninja-like, really. Even so, Kuro was ready to tear her hair out from lack of action. Thank goodness she'd developed self-control, though it was necessary in the first place with her mental disorder. She truly had the strangest thoughts, ranging from killing herself or others to having sex with strangers. She also tended to over-think things. Anyone who got stuck in her head would be mentally scarred after his ordeal was over.

Although it did give her a significant advantage over the Yamanaka clan, didn't it?

She was shaken from her thoughts as the bubble showed a three-man team advancing towards the tower. With a grin, she went to wake the others. Finally, it was time to have some fun.

The team had both scrolls and was taken down quite easily – they fell into one of Gīchi's traps and were quickly taken out (non-lethally, as per Tarantu's orders). Both Kuro and Tarantu's teams now had both scrolls and entered the tower. Two people were there to congratulate them on a job well done, but seemed surprised that they'd worked together. Even so, they'd gotten the thing done in a little over a day.

Utakata sat next to Kuro and Tarantu, idly letting his eyes slide over the room. There were only four teams there – one from Suna (Tarantu, Gīchi, and Maiko), one from Konoha (Kuro, Jinta, and himself), one from Kiri, and one from Kumo (whose members they didn't know by name). The ones from Kumo looked quite menacing to the average person, but also seemed to be the type of people who got by on brute force – and it would take more than brute force to defeat him. The ones from Kiri, by contrast, were quiet and unassuming, meaning they probably relied more on their mental power than the ones from Kumo – they'd be, he believed, the tougher opponents.

Of course, he was pleased with how things had turned out. Since the teams had come from these particular Hidden Villages, that meant that their particular Kage would arrive to watch the Finals. He had no doubt that Zabuza would come once he found out who, exactly, had made it to the Finals, the Hokage would definitely come to cheer on his own participants (it was just something he did), the Kazekage would obviously be there (he was hosting the Exams, after all), and although he didn't know whether the Raikage would come, he knew that he probably would – not to come when most of your other counterparts weren't there was political suicide. And since it would be rude to invite all of the other Kage and not the Iwakage, he'd also be probably invited.

A proctor walked into the room and led them to the room next to it, where they were all instructed to stand in the middle of the room in front of a small platform. They silently followed the proctor's instructions and soon there came a puff of smoke that dissipated to reveal the first a large group of people. The people behind stood in a straight line and consisted of all of the jōnin sensei whose teams made it past the second round. The people in front stood in a semi-circle and consisted of all of the proctors, including the head Proctors for the First and Second tasks. In the middle of the semicircle stood the Kazekage. Hiss eyes swept across the room cleanly, and no one spoke.

Then the Kazekage opened his mouth. "I wish to congratulate you all on passing the Second Exam," he said regally before taking a dramatic pause as he eyed each of the contestants in turn – his eyes seemed to linger on Tarantu and, by extension, Kuro, who had her arm looped through her friends. Kuro, noticing this, gave him a happy grin. This seemed to piss him off for some reason that wasn't made readily apparent to Kuro. But before she could dwell on it, he continued.

"The Third Examination is about to commence. But before I go into the specifics of how it will be conducted, let me make one thing perfectly clear; it pertains to the underlying purpose of this exam." A few of the genin looked confused at this, but he had their undivided attention. "Why," he asked quietly, but not so quietly that they couldn't hear, "do you suppose an examination of this nature is being jointly conducted by all of the nations in our mutual alliance? 'To promote friendship among allied nations and raise the level and standards in the art of the ninja'… Be very clear about what those fine-sounding phrases actually mean. This series of so-called examinations is, in fact…

"…A war-in-miniature between all of our allied lands." No one spoke a word as these words floated gently, yet firmly out of the Kazekage's mouth. That this veil had been dropped so suddenly, the shock most of the genin were feeling had many trembling in their sandals. Only Kuro, Tarantu, and Utakata remained unaffected, and even then Utakata's eyes widened a fraction – whatever he'd been expecting, it wasn't that.

Before the shock could fully wear off, the Kazekage began to explain how the Chūnin Selection Exams came to be (but only briefly; he was, after all, a very busy man), and everyone absorbed as much of this information as they could.

The Kazekage then introduced the Proctor for the Third Exam – his name, Kuro and Tarantu realized in amusement, was Baki: the very same Baki who'd been Gaara, Kankurō, and Temari's jōnin sensei.

Baki then explained when the Third Exams were taking place and they all took numbers out of a box, whereupon he told them who they were fighting:

Utakata versus a female Kiri-nin

Jinta versus Gīchi

A male Kumo-nin versus Kuro

Maiko versus a male Kiri-nin

A female Kumo-nin versus a male Kumo-nin

Tarantu versus a female Kiri-nin

Utakata memorized the form and copied it with one of his bubbles before putting it on a scroll he kept on him for random notes. He glanced at his opponent and inclined his head slightly to show his respect. She did the same. He rolled the scroll back up and placed it in his light blue fighting kimono.

A/N: And so endeth another installation of Made of Fail, authored by yours truly.