Remus tossed over and stared up at the canopy of his four poster bed. As usual, he was awake first, but kept tucked under the warmth of his covers. He looked out at the sunrise and saw owls swooping through the purple tinted horizon.

They had been back at school for three weeks and he was more confused now than ever. He'd had another dream last night… not anything intense, but it definitely wasn't the kind of dream that normal, straight, teenage boys had… because normal, straight, teenage boys didn't have dreams about shoving their best friend against the bookcases in the library and snogging him senseless…

He closed his eyes again, thinking. He'd now had three kisses in his entire life and they had all been with Sirius. What did that mean? That he was… bisexual? Because he knew, he was absolutely certain, that he was not a flaming queen. Or maybe he wasn't even bisexual… he had certainly never thought of boys before this year and even now it never occurred to him to be even remotely interested in any other boy besides Sirius.

It was probably because Sirius was so handsome… this made sense. This totally made sense. Attractive, beautiful people probably turned everyone queer if they stuck around long enough. And Remus had just finished puberty—his hormones were racing on overdrive. This probably happened to a lot of boys, questioning their sexuality, experimenting. And like him, it probably took literally the most drop dead gorgeous boy in the entire school to even make them think slightly of wavering from girls.

He opened his eyes again, a little taken aback by how much more light had poured in as the sun rose higher. He had to snap out of this phase and get on with finding a girlfriend… he'd never worried much about it before, but it was time. He was almost sixteen and if his hormones were resorting to going after boys, he'd give them something to reconsider. He needed a proper snog with a proper girl, and it was the perfect time to do it too… there were only two and half weeks left until Valentine's Day… desperate single girls were everywhere, flirting up a storm every chance they got.

Remus grinned at the red drapes above him. This was going to be easy…

.x~*~x.

"…so then, I was just about to tell her that the mushroom had slipped off the stem and into the potion when Slughorn came over and docked us five points for not paying attention, even though I knew I could have fixed it by just adding another—,"

"Lily, will you go out with me?"

Lily stopped in the middle of the corridor they were patrolling and stared at him.

"Uhm… Remus… I have a boyfriend." she said cautiously.

Remus ' shoulders fell a little.

"Damn," he said leaning against the wall.

Lily was blushing furiously.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to lead you on or anything—,"

"No it's not that, it's just…" he winced, considering her. They were sort of friends, him and Lily, but they weren't great friends. How much could he tell her? Would she actually care about his stupid issues or would she laugh it off awkwardly and then talk rumors about it behind his back? No, no…she wasn't that kind of girl… he could trust her.

"It's just that I'm almost sixteen and haven't had a girlfriend yet. I'm trying to find one by Valentine's Day."

Lily's mouth fell open a little in comprehension.

"Oh…oh," she added more menacingly as her eyes narrowed and she put both hands on her hips "So I was what, just the first bird you ran into? Are you spitting that line out at all the girls?"

"No!" Remus said defensively, cottoning on. "No, it's just… well we're kind of friends aren't we? And I don't know that many girls… and uhm… look, I'm sorry, I guess I shouldn't have asked."

Lily's suspicious face melted into a sheepish awkward look.

"Okay… well…you know Mary might be interested in a date… Josh dumped her before Christmas and she's been disgusting lately trying to find someone for Valentine's Day."

Remus considered for a moment… she had looked very pretty in her tutu that night over break, and she was also a Gryffindor which just made everything easier…

Lily made a stuttering noise and he looked at her.

"Well… look, I know you're the most sensible of the four but…"

Remus didn't need her to finish to understand what she was getting at. He, James, Sirius, and Peter were notorious for their pranks and troublemaking… she being Mary's best friend was obviously worried Remus might treat her with the same respect as he treated his detention record.

"I'm not going to do anything stupid, Lily," he said, raising an eyebrow. "But I think I need to get a girl, and soon… "

He trailed off and she narrowed her eyes at him suspiciously.

"Okay well… if you want to talk to Mary, she loves it when boys notice her school bag is made out of dragons hide. And she's really into politics and Care of Magical Creatures and anything to do with pre-Hogwarts education reform for young witches and wizards."

"Er…" Remus said, trying to remember everything. "Right… thanks Lils…"

Lily laughed a little at his struggling expression.

"What's so funny?"

They both looked around. Mary had just walked around the corner clutching her books. She had a small ink smudge on her cheek.

"Er…nothing…" Remus said.

Mary looked at him, obviously surprised he had spoken to her. Remus jumped on her attention and stepped away from the wall.

"You have an ink smudge on your cheek, Mary." He lifted his hand and rubbed it off with his thumb. Her skin was really soft and his hand brushed against her hair as he pulled it back.

"Thanks." she was looking at him curiously, a suspicious little grin tugging the corner of her mouth.

Remus grinned at her. "Nice dragon hide bag, by the way."

And he turned away, walking back to the Gryffindor common room, confidence soaring through him. He smirked to himself… damn if Mary wasn't his girl by the end of the week…

.x~*~x.

"So we'll need two new bags of dungbombs, a new package of the water-light fireworks, and I think we should try out those biting tea-cups too, they just got them in from Norway."

They were lined up outside of Charms class and James, Sirius, and Peter were listing all the supplies they were going to be getting on the Hogsmead trip Valentines weekend.

"Hey, I have another idea." Sirius said, a wicked grin spreading across his face. "You know that creepy pub at the end of the road, The Hogs Head?"

Peter shook his head vigorously.

"No, no, I heard ogres and hags are in there all the time—,"

"Well then us going with a werewolf, we'll fit right in won't we?" James said, an excited glint in his eyes.

Remus cleared his throat gruffly and said, "Uh… well, I won't actually be… going with you three."

They stared at him like he had just announced his run for Minister of Magic.

Then James laughed.

"Oh, right, very funny, haha—,"

"I'm not joking." Remus said frowning. "I have a…er…date."

They stared.

"With a girl?" Peter said, dumbstruck.

"No, with a blast-ended skrewt, Peter."

"But—" James spluttered.

"With who?" Sirius said, eyes narrowed.

"With er…Mary? Lily's friend?"

They all blinked.

"When did this happen? Why didn't you tell us?" James rounded on him.

"I don't know…" he said throwing his hands a little, but he half glanced at Sirius despite himself. "I guess I just…forgot or something. It only just happened yesterday. We've been kind of… talking to each other since the end of January."

He chanced another glance at Sirius and almost stepped back. Even his skin and iris' seemed darker in the force of his glare. Remus' heart skipped a beat and he trembled a little, unnerved by his reaction.

The door to Charms class opened and Professor Flitwick squeaked at them to enter and get their homework essays out. Remus sighed in relief, preparing to file in and sit on the opposite side of Peter when he felt a painfully hard grip seize him by the bicep and pull him roughly away.

"Ouch!" he yelped furiously. "Sirius, what the—?"

Sirius was hauling him backwards as James and Peter were carried into class by the swarm of students. He turned and pulled Remus behind the nearest corner and threw him angrily against the wall. Remus yelled in surprise and caught himself, almost falling over.

"What the fuck is this, you have a date?" Sirius growled at him. "Why the hell haven't you told me, how the hell did this happen? Did you ask her or did she ask you?"

Remus gaped at him.

"What the hell are you on about? It doesn't even have anything to do with you!"

"She asked you, didn't she? Mary's always been a stupid little slut—,"

"Hey!" Remus yelled, scowling. "She did not ask me, I asked her!"

Sirius blinked. He looked like he'd just been slapped in the face.

"You—? But—," his eyes were bulging. "But you—but—but we—"

Remus' eyebrows shot nearly halfway up his forehead.

"We what, Sirius?"

Sirius hesitated and opened his mouth to speak but Remus didn't want to hear it. He shoved past Sirius and walked back around the corner to Charms class. James' head poked around the doorway as he got there.

"Oh, hey, we were wondering—"

Remus shoved past him with a small growl and threw himself into a seat beside Peter.

He had felt slightly guilty about not telling Sirius, but he had never imagined that Sirius would react this way. What on earth had gotten into him? It wasn't as if they had ever talked about being exclusive or even being anything. And as far as he knew, they had both been trying their hardest to return to normal since the beginning of term.

Granted, he had caught Sirius staring at him a few times, but beyond that Sirius hadn't even hinted at anything between them. Sirius had a lot of nerve, expecting him to just wait around like some patient little lap dog while he got up the nerve to say anything. In fact, Remus had gotten quite comfortable with the idea that they would just continue on like that forever, never mentioning it again and pretending it never happened.

He could hear James accosting Sirius for information but didn't look around. He unbuckled his bag and pulled out his essay about silencing charms when he felt James drop into the seat next to him.

"James, do you have an extra quill, I left mine—"

His voice died in his throat. Sirius was sitting next to him, looking at him sideways, unsmiling.

Fuck.

Remus blinked.

"Er…do you—?"

Sirius rolled his eyes and threw an extra quill on the table in front of him.

"Thanks." Remus mumbled.

He had never been so excruciatingly uncomfortable. Every cell in his body was screaming at him to run as far away from Sirius as possible. It was too awkward for him to bear.

Sighing in agitation, he bent over his parchment and started taking notes on their boiling charm and the elements of certain liquids. If he just kept busy, then neither of them would have to pretend like nothing was wrong…

After thirty minutes he straightened up to listen to Flitwicks lecture without notes. He felt himself giving in, and despite himself, glanced sideways at Sirius.

Sirius was leaning away from him, his head propped against his hand, staring at Remus. His eyes flicked away when he saw him look around.

Every nerve in Remus' body lit on fire. He fidgeted his legs uncomfortably and bent over his parchment again, scribbling relentlessly.

He heard the legs on Sirius' chair scratch slightly against the floor and felt him shifting. Remus ignored him and continued writing.

For liquid elements that have less than two neurons, the charm should be performed with an extra flick towards the end and cannot be preformed nonverbally—

He felt something crawling on his leg and reached down to swipe it off. His hand brushed sideways across his knee and came into contact with—

Remus' quill scratched through his parchment in surprise. He reeled back away from the desk and caught sight of Sirius' hand swatting at his own before sliding further onto his knee.

He stiffened, eyes widening as he looked around at everyone except Sirius. Peter hadn't noticed. James hadn't noticed. No one else was paying them any attention.

He bent over his parchment again and heard Sirius let out a breathy laugh.

Remus still didn't look at him. The hand on his knee was clutching him gently over and over… and then…it was sliding upward, up his thigh, closer to—

Remus gasped inaudibly. His toes curled in his shoes and he blinked rapidly, forcing his eyes not to glaze over. Sirius' hand lingered on his inner thigh, moving backward and forward, thumb caressing him. Remus wasn't writing anymore, but he was still bent over his parchment, hands shaking, trying his best not to become noticeable. The hand on his thigh was warm, the heat from it seeping through his robes. He could feel blood pooling in his groin again, cursing to himself when he felt his trousers becoming uncomfortably tight around his hard-on.

Then—nothing could have prepared him for it— Sirius' hand suddenly clenched, frighteningly tight and possessively, and Remus doubled over on the desk, breathing out through his clenched teeth, gripping his quill like a knife jabbed into the desk, looking around desperately to see if anyone was looking. When he saw they weren't, he gulped, straightening up, and tried to compose himself.

Sirius' hand was still clenched, trying to pull his thighs open. Remus panted and pursed his lips, cursing to himself before giving in and allowing is legs to spread apart from each other.

Wrong move. Very wrong move.

Sirius' hand slid forward and cupped his throbbing erection, pressing his palm rhythmically into it.

Remus gasped audibly, eyes closing, face screwed up in arousal.

"Remus?" James whispered, leaning forward over the table to look at him from Sirius' right side.

He felt the hand on his crotch lift immediately and he cleared his throat, eyes flying open. A few others had looked around at him when he'd gasped, including Mary, who was in the row in front of them.

"Er—headache" he invented hastily.

It must have been convincing because the others turned back to face Flitwick. Remus bent back over his parchment, re-tracing the last sentence he'd written. Half way through, he tilted his head and finally chanced another look at Sirius.

Sirius was writing notes again, a satisfied smirk splayed across his face, chin lifted and head cocked so he was looking down on his notes with a haughty expression. Remus stared at him in disbelief… and then, Sirius' eyes flicked up and spotted Remus out of his peripheral vision… he turned to look back, the smirk sliding from his face.

Remus held his gaze, watching his eyes closely for any sign of emotion, but there wasn't any… except maybe a tiny amount of longing…and then quite suddenly, Sirius' eyes darted down, resting on Remus' lips—

The bell rang and there was a great rush as chairs scraped the stone floor and Flitwick squeaked their homework instructions at them. Remus turned, clutching his messenger bag rather closer to the front of his body than usual, and walked quickly to the door without waiting for any of the others.

.x~*~x.

It was nighttime again and not everyone had come up to bed yet. Remus had crawled into bed with his pajamas, leaning against his headboard, knees bent with his book propped against them. Pallas had already crawled into bed and was reading too as Jacob took his shower.

Remus reached a particularly tedious section of the mystery novel he was reading and looked up. Pallas was cleaning his glasses off.

"Hey, what did you end up doing over break?" Remus called over to him.

Pallas put his glasses back on and grinned sheepishly.

"Well…you know Lola… from Hufflepuff?"

Remus smiled broadly.

"Catch her under the mistletoe, did you?"

"Well… something like that."

"Are you two going out then?"

Pallas lifted his book again, trying to conceal his burning cheeks.

"I'm not sure…but she keeps cornering me in the halls and pulling me into the broom closets to snog me. We spent the whole lunch hour behind the tapestry on the second floor yesterday."

Remus laughed at him.

"What about you?" Pallas said. "I heard you were going out with Mary now."

Remus' smile fell off his face.

"Uhm… it's kind of complicated…"

Pallas looked up at him, frowning bemusedly.

"What do you mean? You're not seeing anyone else are you?"

Remus shifted uncomfortably.

"No," he said. "No, I'm not."

He went back to his book, ready to forget himself in the fictional world, when he heard the door close.

Sirius was standing there, looking coolly down his majestic face at Remus.

"Oh, shit." Remus thought to himself.

Sirius looked over at Pallas.

"Jacob in the showers?"

"Yeah, he just went in like five minutes ago so you've got a while." Pallas grinned apologetically at him. His best friend had a bad habit of using up all the hot water.

Remus tried to ignore Sirius as the other boy pulled his robes off and put on his pajamas. He was terrified that Sirius would look up and catch him staring at his half-naked body… that was the last thing he needed right now…

But Sirius didn't seem to pay him any attention either. He pulled the curtains around the foot of his bed and grabbed a book for himself before closing the ones on either side of him. Remus felt a little easier when Sirius was hidden from view. Their beds were opposite each other in the round dormitory and they probably would have just kept catching each other's eye awkwardly until the lights were extinguished…

Remus scratched his nose and flipped the page. He saw something move out of the corner of his eye and looked over to his nightstand…

It wasn't anything that moved, he found out. His letter carrier, the one Sirius shared with him, had suddenly turned bright red.

He glanced over to Sirius' bed before reaching out and opening it.

Don't go out with Mary. Please.

Remus stared at it. Again, he looked up at Sirius' curtains. Snatching up his quill, he scribbled a quick response.

Why do you care who I go out with?

He waited. Sirius must have cast a silencing spell at his curtain because he never heard the scratch of a quill before the response was appearing in his own book.

I don't like Mary. Don't go out with her.

Remus frowned. Two could play this game…

Good, because I'm going out with Lily, I only said Mary so James wouldn't get mad at me.

Remus smiled vengefully. The response was scribbled messily.

I don't like Lily either, she's a stupid flirt. Don't go out with her.

Remus laughed cruelly.

I'm not going out with her, you arse, I was just testing to see if you would say that to any girl and you proved me right. I'm going out with Mary and there's nothing you can say that's going to stop me.

He waited. And waited. Remus checked the time, drumming his fingers against the cover. Finally, just when he was getting ready to close it and go back to his book, a short message appeared.

But what about me?

Remus felt something swelling in his throat. What the hell was wrong with him? He heaved a few emotional breaths and then pressed his lips together, jaw set as he wrote back.

What about you? I don't want anything with you. Go find yourself a girl if you want to grope anyone from now on.

He held his breath. But the response wasn't what he expected.

Close your curtains.

Remus blinked at it.

Why?

He waited.

Just do it.

Remus frowned and looked over at Pallas who had slid down in bed and was completely absorbed in his own book.

Okay. Remus reached down and pulled the curtains shut at the base of his bed. Putting his novel on the night stand, he pulled the other two around and stretched out in the empty enclosed space. He muttered a silencing and illumination spell for good measure… better safe than sorry.

Okay, now what?

He fidgeted…this wasn't a good idea. He should open his curtains.

Put your palm on the front cover between the quotation marks.

Remus frowned and closed the book. He held his palm above it, hovering, hesitating, before pressing against it.

There was a sudden warmth that surged through his fingertips and an invisible force pushed him backward against the headboard as Sirius appeared in front of him, his own palm pressed against the cover of the other journal.

Remus' eyes widened in shock.

"How did you do that?" he whispered.

Sirius grinned, tossing the journal aside.

"They came with that little charm built in."

Remus put his book down too. They looked at each other for a second before Sirius shuffled and moved forward. Remus backed up when he realized Sirius had started to crawl towards him.

"Sirius stop it!" he scolded, cheeks turning red.

"Or what?" Sirius whispered dangerously.

Remus' back hit the mattress and suddenly Sirius was on top of him, hands on either side of his head, staring down at him.

"We can't…you need to go, just get out of here."

Sirius smirked down at him.

"Make me."

Remus' eyes slanted in defeat. He was never able to stand up to any of them, not really…

"What are we doing?" he said instead, buying time.

Sirius frowned.

"I don't know."

Remus just looked up at him helplessly.

"You don't know? You're just, what, crawling into my bed for god knows what—,"

"I know what." Sirius said, grinning wickedly.

Remus turned his head to the side, lips pressed defiantly together.

"I don't know what the hell you're playing at anymore, Sirius."

Sirius leaned forward and breathed hotly against his ear.

"I was going to finish what I started earlier in Charms class, if you don't mind."

Remus gasped, eyes glazing as his tried to look back at Sirius.

"Don't—I don't—,"

"Do you have any idea," Sirius interrupted, whispering against his ear. "how hot you looked, bent over the desk, gasping for me..."

Remus moaned. Sirius buried his face in the crook of Remus' neck and reached down with both hands to grip Remus' hips. Before he could object, Remus felt hips and a very obvious erection thrust into him.

He was completely undone. Moaning, he reached up to pull Sirius down on top of him. Their pajamas slid over them, causing a soft sort of friction as they rutted against each other.

Sirius moaned into his neck.

"Unnhg…Remus…shit, Remus…"

He gasped, choking on his words. Remus had never done anything like this before… he wasn't really sure what he was doing or if they were doing it right… all he knew was that it felt amazing and from the pressure building in his pajamas, he was far too close to last much longer…

He realized, as Sirius moaned again, that he was just lying there as Sirius thrust against him. He opened his thighs slightly, bent his knees and tried rolling his hips to thrust back.

Sirius felt it and his fingers dug into Remus' sides as he realized he was responding. They both gasped as their cocks lined up and rubbed against each other, side by side, thrusting and sliding as they became harder and started leaking—

Remus' fantasies had been a lot smoother than this. Everything he had ever imagined when he was jerking himself off had been choreographed in perfect sequence, effortlessly preformed. But this was something else— his muscles were aching, both of them were fumbling in the surge of their arousal, but it was somehow so much more exciting and intoxicating… if this had been a fantasy, he wouldn't be so close to cuming just yet, he'd be going for much longer…but right now, his balls were seizing, his cock hardening, the pressure building as pleasure shot through him with each thrust—

"Sirius… I'm too…" he whimpered, eye screwed shut, arms clutching at Sirius' body. He couldn't finish his sentence, couldn't admit to his friend just how much he was turned on.

Sirius moaned, thrusting harder.

"Just cum for me," he growled.

Remus came completely undone and felt an unstoppable surge of arousal push him into his orgasm. He moaned wantonly against Sirius' neck, raking his nails harshly down his back as hot semen shot from his convulsing cock. His muscles contracted, making him tremble against Sirius' body.

Sirius thrust two more times, feeling Remus below him, and shuddered into his own orgasm, collapsing inwards and rutting until he was completely spent.

Remus was panting, the ache in his groin subsiding. He let his head fall back onto the pillow as Sirius lifted his head to look at him.

"Don't—," Remus started. "Don't kiss me… please… just…"

Sirius hovered over him for a moment, lips so close that they almost touched.

"Okay," he whispered softly.

Remus groaned as Sirius climbed off him and sat up. Both of their pajamas were soaked. Sirius avoided his eyes, looking down and grabbing up his journal again.

Remus hesitated.

"We'll, er—," he whispered. "we'll talk tomorrow, okay? It'll be…it'll be fine, this'll work out."

Sirius looked up at him, eyes smoldering, before looking down again and placing his hand on the cover.

Remus reached his hand over to do the same on his own cover.

"Goodnight, Sirius," he whispered before he pressed downward and Sirius vanished, leaving him alone in the dark.