A/N: I decided to split chapter 6 up into 3 parts because it's a really long chapter and a lot happens, but it's all centered around Elina and Edward. This chapter is one of my favorites and I had a lot of fun writing it, so I hope you guys enjoy it as much as I do. Please don't forget to review, I would really love to hear what you think!
Thanks a bunch and enjoy :)
6. Edward Cullen: Part 1
Running with Edward was the greatest euphoria I've ever experienced. Being with him felt electric; sparks always flew. I couldn't help but feel that way with him. His presence just draws you in and suctions you to him. Every second thought is about Edward Cullen. Every other experience reminds you of him. He surrounds you even when he isn't there. A part of me – I don't know how big – was falling for Edward Cullen. Edward Cullen – even saying his name made me weak at the knees.
And I knew it was wrong to want him. Edward is unattainable. He is a married man. Not only does he belong to another, but I did too. Or at least I thought I did.
I don't know what there is between Jacob Black and me anymore. Maybe it's over. It was too quick to go off telling him I loved him, anyway. I probably don't love him, at least not yet. But now, who knows if I'll ever get the chance to. He's lied to me so many times in such a short period of time. He is the most deceptive person I've ever met.
My feelings for Jacob are very different than those I have for Edward. With Jacob it's more of a crush; being with him feels right and I feel safe with him. But with Edward, it's a whole other level. I'm dazzled every time I see him. He's the guy you can't have and shouldn't want, yet everything draws you to him. Every fibre of my being lives for the next time my eyes will be locked with his golden, topaz eyes. My heart races when I hear his voice. But, I wouldn't call what I feel for Edward love. I'm infatuated by him.
I was so buried in my thoughts that I hadn't realized Edward was stopping and was yanked backwards, since my hand was still linked to his. Edward's arms were under me just before I hit the ground. He was always right there, ready to catch me. I dusted myself off and looked up at the beauty that was before me. I had never laid eyes on such a gorgeous meadow. I was breath taken. A huge smile danced across my face as I spun around slowly to catch a glimpse of every inch of this amazing place.
"This is..." I whispered, so coiled in the splendour that surrounded me that I was unable to finish my sentence.
"Beautiful, isn't it?" Edward whispered into my ear.
"Yes" I breathed.
"This is where I come to clear my thoughts; whenever I need to be alone."
I turned to look at Edward and marvel in his beauty amidst the magnificence that surrounded us. This place suited him perfectly. It's almost as beautiful as he is. And Edward was right, my mind was clear. All I wanted to do was sit in the grass and stare at him. He held his hand out, gesturing me to have a seat. Sometimes Edward reading my thoughts wasn't so bad. It allowed for things like this to happen without the awkwardness of me asking him and then the silence that would no doubt come after that.
We sat side by side, facing each other. Edward was laying flat in the grass, staring off into space. I stared at his hand that lay smooth in the dark green grass. I wanted to touch it, to feel his icy skin against my warm skin. Without pondering it any further, I reached out and took his hand. He turned to look at me when he felt the warmth of my skin interfere with the coolness of his. He closed his eyes and a smile appeared across his face. I flipped his hand over so that his palm was facing up and matched each of my fingers to his. I pressed my palm into his and he returned the pressure into mine. A shiver jolted down my spine. I liked it. There was something pleasurable about the conflicting temperatures of our hands. Edward sat up quickly, releasing his hand from mine. We stared into each others' eyes for what seemed like an extremely long minute. He then placed his hand at the base of my neck. I closed my eyes and gulped at the chill on my chest. My heart began to beat faster, so much so that I could almost feel the blood as it flowed through my veins.
And then it happened; a vision at the most inconvenient time, as if they happened any other way.
I was standing in the meadow, except it wasn't just Edward and I. I was the third party this time. Edward and Bella were talking, of what I wasn't sure. I inched closer to hear what they were saying.
"No, really, it was more the surprise than anything else." Edward told Bella. He then placed his hand at the side of Bella's neck. "You see. Perfectly fine." He told her.
I felt warmth rush back to the base of my neck and was shocked back into reality, where it was just Edward and I in the meadow. He was looking at me, lips parted and hesitant to speak. I knew then that he saw what I had just seen in my vision. I licked my lips, staring at the earth beneath me. I wasn't sure whether to confront him or forget about it. I was expecting Edward to hear my thoughts and explain what I had just seen, but he didn't. I would have to make the first move.
"Edward? What did I just see?" I asked, still keeping my eyes away, for if I looked into his eyes I would dismiss the entire thing and go back to being completely engrossed in his presence.
"The day I showed Bella I was different. I wasn't used to being so close to her and had to keep leaving her to gain control of myself. Touching her neck was a way of reassuring her that I wouldn't hurt her." He mumbled.
"I see..." I whispered. "Why did you just do that to me, Edward?" I asked.
"I'm sorry. It's not related, I swear. Bella and I sat here like you and I are now and she held my hand like you did. I remembered how good the warmth felt and I placed my hand by your neck on impulse. I truly am sorry, Elina." He explained. I could feel his eyes on me, but I couldn't muster the strength to look into them.
"Yeah, me too." I sighed, upset about the ruined moment. Selfishly, I gave in and met Edward's eyes. Just as I predicted, I fell right back into his charm. I knew he didn't mean to charm me – dazzle me – as he always did. It just happened to be who he was. It never failed to work its magic on me.
"I suppose we should leave." Edward said, about to stand up.
"No!" I clung to his wrist. "Not yet, please?" I begged. He smiled and remained seated. I grinned at my victory.
"You're not upset?"
"I guess not. I was being selfish, anyway. I love the way your skin feels against mine. Having your hand at my neck was...nice." I laughed.
"I'm glad it was as good for you as it was for me."
"Do you miss that about Bella?"
"I suppose. It's the little things, like the way she would blush every time I stroked her cheek; how clumsy she was and how I would always be there to catch her; she was a magnet for danger and, although I hated that I put her life in danger, I miss being the one to save her."
"Human things..."
"Yes" He agreed.
"Hey, what did you mean when you said you showed her you were different?" I asked curiously, recalling that bit of information.
"I suppose we haven't revealed that part to you, yet. It's been very rainy lately."
"What is it?"
"We...sparkle – in the sun. That's why we can't be in the sun, because others would know we were different. If it weren't so gloomy today, I'd show you."
Sparkling vampires? This gets even weirder every day. And then it hit me. I've never sparkled.
"But, I don't sparkle in the sun." I blurted out my thoughts.
"No, because you're partly human and humans don't sparkle" He laughed.
"I suppose not." I giggled. That would be a funny one for Marie to explain to the neighbours if I did sparkle. 'Nonsense, that is not her skin, we've been dabbling in some arts and crafts!' No, she'd probably just shun me from the world on sunny days. That seems more like Marie. Edward laughed at my thoughtful impression of my mother. In some ways it was easy to communicate with him that way. An idea struck me.
'Thank you for sharing this with me, Edward' I thought. Edward laughed.
"You're welcome." He spoke.
'A part of me doesn't want to leave.' I accidentally thought. Too late to regret it now...
"We can stay as long as you'd like." He replied. "Are you going to be doing this a lot?" He asked, his left brow rose a bit.
'Possibly' I giggled. This was very interesting. Speaking of thoughts, something Edward said about mine has been bugging me ever since he said it. 'Why are my thoughts strange?'
"What? And can you please speak?" He asked. I obliged.
"You said before that you heard my thoughts as I slept and that they were strange." Edward laughed, recalling when he said that.
"You don't think like everyone else. Your thoughts are like snippets of things, yet they're all connected. Sometimes it's like you're speaking to yourself in your head. Other times, you play a song in your thoughts. And other times there are images, some almost like little movies in your mind. And then there are times where all of that happens at once, mostly while you sleep. It's quite fascinating."
"You think my thoughts are fascinating?" I laughed in disbelief. Nothing I think is remotely fascinating.
"That's not true. You are extremely fascinating to me." Edward said, looking me directly in the eyes. I released my gaze on him and looked away. This was wrong.
"Edward, we can't keep doing this. I am not Bella. You have her, she is yours...permanently."
"I know" He said, defeated.
"I should go." I said, standing. I turned to look back at Edward one last time and tripped. The palm of my hand landed on a very sharp rock, piercing my skin. I could smell my blood. A part of me wanted to suck the blood from my hand, but I controlled the urge. And then I saw Edward. His hand was over his nose as he struggled not to breathe. He fought with his instincts to take me right then and now. I didn't know what to do. If I ran he could give in to his instincts and run after me. If I stayed he might not be able to resist. I had to make the blood go away. Within a second my hand was at my mouth as I sucked the blood from my wound. It tasted so good. I never thought I would be saying that about my own blood. I wasn't sure I'd be able to stop, but once the blood ceased to come through the wound I restrained myself from biting through my own hand. I dropped my hand from my mouth, curling it into a fist and wiping the corners of my mouth with the back of my closed fist. I could see Edward begin to relax. I wanted to comfort him, but didn't think it was the best idea to get too close.
"Are you alright?" I asked. Edward nodded, still not breathing. I stood up slowly and took a step back. Edward took a deep breath, relaxing his shoulders and releasing the tight fists his hands were in. "I'm sorry, Edward. That had to be extremely difficult for you."
"Don't apologize; it's not your fault." He gulped.
Well, it kind of is. If I weren't human, falling on a sharp rock wouldn't be a problem. But, I couldn't tell Edward that. Although, I'm sure he already heard it through my thoughts anyway.
"You were able to restrain yourself pretty quickly though..." I remarked.
"It's not the first time an incident of this nature has happened." He said.
"Ah, Bella..." Of course, he's had to restrain himself against drinking Bella's blood in a freakishly similar incident, right? Is there anything I do that isn't like human Bella?
"She got a paper cut while she was at our house and, with all of us there, she was in extreme danger. But, I managed to restrain myself and get her out of there. Jasper was having quite a difficult time keeping himself from draining her." He recalled.
"I really should go" I interrupted. I suddenly felt uncomfortable being alone with Edward. Not because he almost drained me of my blood, but because he was in love with Bella and I was hurting their relationship. I couldn't live with myself if they divorced because of me. Can vampires even get divorced?
"I thought you wanted to stay?" He said, seemingly disappointed.
"I do, but...I really should get home. I've been gone for days, my parents won't be too happy about that."
"I suppose you're right." He agreed. He seemed sad.
"Why do you care if I stay or go, Edward?" I asked, looking at him directly.
"I don't know. I just feel very...protective of you. There is something about you that draws me in. I only want what's best for you." He explained, meeting my gaze on him.
"I'm fine, Edward. You shouldn't worry about me. I'm going to run back. Are you coming?"
"No, I think I'll stay here for a while." Edward said as he turned and walked away from me. I watched him glide across the grass effortlessly. A part of me wanted to reach out for him, but I suppressed that feeling quickly and ran in the other direction.
Bella was outside waiting for Edward when I got back to the house. She became infuriated when she saw me.
"Where is he?" she demanded.
"He's still at the meadow." As the words fumbled from my lips, Bella's expression changed from anger to sorrow.
"He brought you...to our meadow?" she whispered. If she could cry, now would be when the tears would flow.
"I...I didn't know, Bella, I'm sorry" I said, noticing Jacob standing behind her. The last person I wanted to see.
"What's going on?" Jake asked. I refused to look at him. I could feel his eyes on me and began to feel uncomfortable. I apologized to Bella again quickly and ran past Jacob into the house to find Carlisle.
Emmett was in the living room with Rosalie when I appeared. Seeing them made me regret not being able to get to know them or Alice and Jasper. Most of my time has been taken over by Jacob and Edward. But, it was too late now. I was going to leave and I don't know when I'll ever get the chance to really know them.
"Hey Elina, what's up?" Emmett smiled. He seemed like such a happy guy, like a huge teddy bear.
"Do either of you know where Carlisle is?" I asked.
"Last I heard, he was working a double shift at the hospital." Rosalie said, coldly. I could tell she wasn't a fan of strangers. Or more particularly, human strangers.
"Would you happen to know where my car is?"
"Yeah, come on!" Emmet hopped up. Rosalie rose after him, reluctantly. I followed them into the garage and spotted my tomato red Pontiac next to the silver Volvo. I sighed when I saw it, thinking of Edward all alone in the meadow. I wished I could go back there, but it wasn't my place to be, it was Bella's.
"Thanks" I hollered back to Emmett and Rosalie as I opened the door to my car and sat inside. The keys were conveniently placed in the ignition. I turned my car on and could hear the garage open behind me. I reversed at full speed. Suddenly I could not wait to be away from the Cullen's and on my own for the drive back home. I didn't even bother to grab my things before I left. Maybe I did it on purpose, as an incentive for me to go back.
The drive felt long. I probably could have made it home quicker if I ran. I wondered if Jacob would have realized I left or if he'd even care. He has Renesmee, he'll get over me. I wish I could say the same. Jacob just gets under my skin. I've never fought with someone so much in such a short period of time. I've never fell for anyone so quickly either. Thinking about Jacob was infuriating. I decided to change to subject. Edward should be home by now. Bella will probably confront him about taking me to their meadow. Why would he be so stupid and bring me to a place that was special to the two of them? He had to know it would hurt her. These feelings I have for him are so wrong. I mean, I barely know him. But the way I feel when he's around it just inexpressible. I wonder if he can still hear my thoughts. I need to stop thinking about him. Song, I need a song...hm...da na na...I'm down to a whisper in a day dream on a hill...
I pulled into my driveway and noticed all of the lights on inside. Ronald was always very particular about how many lights were allowed to be on. God forbid I left a light on while he was around. He would get so angry. I felt nervous as I walked up to my front door. It was like the queasiness you feel when you're about to write a really hard exam and are walking into the room you have to write it in. I took a deep breath and knocked on the door. Marie answered it.
"Elina, my darling I'm so glad you decided to come home!" She exclaimed as she wrapped her arms around me. She hollered for Ronald as she pulled me inside.
"Hi mom..." I said, trying to look happy to be home.
"Oh, sweetheart I was praying you would come back to us! And here you are..." She said, fiddling with my hair.
"Yeah, here I am..."
"Your father must be busy with the caterer. Why don't you go get ready and see him later?"
"What?" I held on to the hope that there wasn't a party going on tonight. This is not what I wanted to come back for.
"Well, it's your father's annual black tie ball, dear. All of his business man friends and their sons will be here!" She squealed. "Your gown is upstairs. We'll have Lorenzo do something with your hair while he's here." She said, curling her fingers around the end of a section of my hair.
"Mom, I don't..."
"I don't want to hear it, go upstairs!" She pushed me towards the stair case. I sighed and slouched my shoulders as I trudged up the marble steps. How ironic that I left during a party and came back just in time for another.
The door to my bedroom was closed when I reached it. I opened the door and everything was exactly how I'd left it, except for the long garment bag that lay across my bed. I can't believe she got me a dress. How she knew I would be back for this was beyond me. I unzipped the bag and laid eyes on a tomato red, satin gown in a halter style with a jewel encrusted bodice. I recalled Marie telling me this was a black tie event, where all guests are permitted to wear black only, according to my father's rules. This had to be a mistake. I was on my way to tell my mother about the gown mishap when I bumped into Lorenzo, who then shoved me back inside my room.
"Oh no you don't!" He said in his very thick Italian accent. "When I am done with you, you gonna be beautiful!"
"Lorenzo, I have to see my mom there's something wrong with the dress." I explained as he dragged me over to the bathroom.
"Che? Impossibile!" He exclaimed in Italian. He waltzed over to the dress and laughed. "Elina, there is no problem. This is your dress, cara."
"But it's red"
"Si, you are to wear red tonight. Now stop fussing so Lorenzo can work his magic, eh!"
I sighed and allowed Lorenzo to have full control over my hair. He never disappointed me when it came to my hair. When he was finished, he let out a quick 'voila!' and then fled the room. I looked at myself in the mirror and barely recognized the woman staring back at me. Long, thick curls flowed around my face, red lipstick painted my lips and my eyes were framed with thick, long lashes. It was time for the dress. I walked over to my bed, picking the dress up by the hanger and stared at it for a moment. It seemed a bit too...slinky for my tastes. I hoped it wouldn't be too revealing as I stepped into it. I slipped my shoes on, which were also jewel encrusted, and looked at the finished product in the mirror. I was sucked back into the lifestyle I was suffocated by before. I gulped and reminded myself that all I had to do was get through tonight.
I could hear loud talking and glasses clinking downstairs. The party must have begun without me. I wish there were a way to make a discreet entrance, but with heels against marble stairs that is utterly impossible. I walked over to the banister and stared down at the sea of black below me, then at the bright red of my dress. I felt embarrassed to be wearing such a loud color. I composed myself and took my first step down the stairs. The loud clack from my heels startled me and I paused at the top of the stairs on impulse. All heads turned to me and I would be subjected to walking down the stairs with countless eyes burning into me. To say I felt uncomfortable is an understatement. A waitress handed me a glass of champagne and I took a sip, hoping it would help relax my nerves. I weaved in and out of the crowd until I reached the kitchen and the doors of the terrace. Surprisingly, no one was out there. I opened the doors and stepped outside. There was a slight cold breeze, but nothing unbearably cold. I revelled in the silence. I was finally alone. Or so I thought. I noticed the trees move and I squinted my eyes to see what was in the woods behind my house. I could have sworn I saw someone amongst the trees; a tall, slender man. I shook my head, convinced that I was just fooling myself into thinking Edward was here. I wish he were here. I felt so vulnerable and trapped. When I was with him, the rest of the world was completely distant from me. I sighed, coming to terms that Edward would be with Bella and not here with me. A tap on my shoulder interrupted my thoughts. A smile stretched across my face.
"Edward, I should have known that you would..." I stopped as I turned to see who the tap belonged to. "Jason" I blurted out in reaction to his face. This could not be happening to me.
"Hello Elina, you look incredible tonight" he said in a raspy, low tone.
"Excuse me" I said, pushing past him. He grabbed a hold of my arm and I dropped the champagne glass. "God, can you keep your hands to yourself for two seconds?" I yelled, stepping away from the shattered glass. Jason still had a grip on my wrist.
"Sorry, I just don't want you to leave. I've missed you. I thought we could get to know each other this time, without any violence." He said as he raised an eyebrow to the last comment. He stepped closer to me, his lips parted and I could feel the breath escape them. I felt afraid at first, but then empowered. I am a vampire. I can get rid of Jason so quickly and have a little fun in the process. I smiled at the thought of my teeth sinking into his flesh, the blood pooling into my mouth. I could almost taste it. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.
"See, I knew you wanted me. This can be a very...euphoric experience for the both of us." He breathed.
"Oh you have no idea." I whispered. A slight growl came from my throat. It stunned me, I've never growled before. The vibration in my throat felt so natural and pleasing. Jason inched closer, placing his hands on my waist and I fixated my gaze on his neck as I listened for his heart. I could hear it beat faster and could practically feel the blood flowing. I licked my lips as I inched closer, licking where his jugular vein would soon meet my lips. I opened my mouth slowly, setting my teeth on the target and about to rip into his neck. And then I heard him screaming my name.