A/N: There's a small part here that is a flashback of the DC comic "Year One: Scarecrow" It has references of when Jonathan was bullied when he was young. It was tough seeing how he was treated when he was young, seeing as I don't like bullying at all.

Disclaimer: Don't own anything.

Push My Buttons

"Scarecrow?" I quietly whispered.

Why does this small apartment feel so cold? Is this how it feels being completely lonely? I curled up on the floor, holding my knees tight to my chest. I felt so empty, from the inside out. My Scarecrow was missing. And I couldn't do anything at the moment. All I could do is sit, and wait in the shadows. I didn't put my faith in the Joker because the moment you trust someone, they tend to turn their back on you. No, who I trust in has always been with me my entire life. But now, I can slowly feel him slipping from my grasp.

I remembered back then, in my younger days when I have been bullied by other kids. I remembered when my grandmother would always make me work in the hot soaring sun. An inferno. She never respected me, she only saw me as a tool, nothing more, nothing less. Maybe if things would have been different, I've might not have been in this situation. Maybe if I was born anywhere else, I might not be feeling this empty. But the reality is, there is no such thing as a maybe anymore. Not for me. Not ever.

The bullies, Grandmother, the Batman, and even the people of Gotham have all one thing in common. They all suffer from a reality that will never be. While I on the other hand feel as if I'm confined in a steel cage, and everyone else is watching from the outside in, while I watch from the inside out. A caged animal. A freak. I don't know how much more I can take of this. I- I feel myself slowly slipping from reality. Anger slowly pilling up: taking me under the tides, to for never come back up. Yes, I feel like a caged… crow. The one thing I truly hate. I'm becoming the one thing that I truly hate. And they are the ones pushing me to the brink of no return. Making me filthy, tainted. I slowly started panting, "ha hu ha, it's not the voices I hear in my head, that define me, it's the choices that I have made."

Deceived by my eyes, and all I was told to see. Opinions not mine, the person I was told to be. But one day, a night in the dark; a vision of someone I knew. Then in the darkness, I saw, a voice say I'm you. At that moment, a light was turned on. And I was alive. If I just closed my eyes, my life would reveal before me. These dreams that I will never live, and scars that will never heal. In the darkness, I will pass onto the other side. Scarecrow. I slowly feel myself close to an intense fire, but yet so cold, and numb with a pain. I slowly feel myself jitter out, "am I trapped in somebody's dream? Scarecrow." No, I'm in control; I'm the one who has always had control. But then why do I feel like a river has broken inside me? Washed into the ocean… I- I can't breathe. I need that voice inside me to save me.

I started clawing at my arms, and pulling at my sleeves. "I never thought I would be here. So, is this my unanswered prayer? No, I- I know that, I'm defined by… by so much wasted time. "Just a little longer," I slowly whispered to myself, "a little longer." My actions will echo across this land, and into the next. They will all pay.

Jona-tha-n…

I slowly brought my head up, as there was sweat falling over my face. My lips looked very pale. I could feel myself look very pale, very sick. I slowly responded, "Scare- Scarecrow?"

Jona-than, I know this is a bad time. Considering that th- this connection is slowly slipping, but I have to tell you one thing.

I whispered, "what?"

I never once asked you to show me how human you were. Or how much more you could become…

My eyes widened as my lips trembled. I slowly closed my eyes; feeling myself falling. Falling back to a time where I still considered myself human.

"…There he is! The livin' Handrail! Whatcha readin', Handrail? Looks bigger'n you!"

I looked up holding my book tightly. Scared.

They got closer to me, and the one who was talking, grabbed my book from me while the other two kicked me.

"'Ulysses'. Seen the movie. Fights one-eyed giants 'n' freakos. That why you like it, freako?"

I screamed out, "that's a different book! Please give it back-"and once again, I was cut off as the two boys kicked at me, and kept me on the ground.

The fatter one said, "James Joyce! Guy's gotta a Fairy name! Jeez- it's like kickin' a Scarecrow!"

The kid who had my book dropped it, and grabbed me from behind, wrapping my head in a headlock, holding up a match. "Tell ya what, Scarecrow. Give ya a choice. You or the fairy book. Pick!"

All I could do was struggle as the book had been left abandoned by the tree I was sitting by, opened up to a random page.

"…No… PLEASE!... EEEEEEEE!"

Screaming.

"AHHHHHH! NOOOOOO!"

I woke up panting in my sweat. I was trembling, but not because of the wind blowing from outside the open window. But for the nightmare that I just had. I grabbed at the sides of my head, trembling. "It was just a dream, only a dream." I said as I tried to reassure myself.

I tried to calm myself back down, and get my breathing back to normal. I sneered, "BATMAN." I said that name with so much hate, so much bitter. He's the one that did this to me. He's the one who poisoned me. The one who took away my Scarecrow. "One day 'Batman', I will smile as I watch your dead corps before me."

I never again was able to sleep that night.

A/N: This chapter mainly shows how Jonathan is slowly losing his mind. I hope this chapter came out as good as I thought it would.

Also, I don't know how many more updates I'll be able to do. Mainly because I really like to know what you guys think. If there are not many reviews, then I'll might have to push this story a side, and place my attention on the other ones that I have ignored. So please, do review, they make me want to continue on this story.

One final thing; thank you Silas C. Ren, for reviewing. It only takes a couple of seconds to review guys.

Enjoy the chapter!