Whoa, this was actually longer than I expected it to be when I began breaking everything in to chapters, but it kind of all goes together under Sakura's POV.

So my treat! Enjoy!

~*SAKURA*~

I was practically dead when the girls came to visit. Visit was probably not the right word. Visit sounded too orderly and civil for the way they liked to invade my living room. Seriously, a girl can't catch a break, even from her best friends. Hinata, Tenten, and Ino stockpiled onto my sofa. It groaned under the weight. They were severely disrupting my "being miserable" time. I was camped out in my living room, armed with every chick-flick in my possession and more cookie dough ice cream and popcorn. And Coke. I guzzled some straight from the liter bottle as they stared at me with large, sympathetic eyes. Really, they just stared. It was kind of pissing me off.

"What?" I inquired, sharper than I had meant. I knew they were just there because they cared, but I didn't like pity. I had enough for myself to go around. Sure, I was dramatic and had complaining down to an art, but always about the stupid things. I solved my own damn problems. This one was just proving itself… difficult.

"You okay, sweetie?" Ino asked using her sugary sweet tone of voice. Uh-uh. She didn't use that voice with me. With your best friend, you're supposed to use your mega-bitch, keep it real voice. I wasn't going to take the abuse.

"I'm fine." I snapped, shoving my face with another spoonful of cookie dough. Oh yeah, that'll show her.

"Come on, Sakura. Guys are all dicks." Tenten said, trying to console me. She wasn't very good at the whole girl best friend thing. I didn't want to hear that from a bunch of girls with whipped (albeit, pretty fine) boyfriends.

"Yeah," Ino jumped in. "Come shopping with us. It'll take your mind off things."

I looked down at what I was wearing. Yoga pants and a ratty old sweatshirt. Not shopping attire. Besides, my eyes were probably all puffy red and my hair a mess. I didn't want to be happy. Or move from my seat. "No thanks, guys. I think I'll stay in."

They exchanged silent glances before Ino proposed, "Then we'll hang out here."

I bit my lip. Maybe I was bitter at their being happily deflowered and dating, but I didn't want them here. They'd gossip about how wonderful their boyfriends are and how perfect their lives are and happy, happy, happy. An intrusion in my self-therapy. "If you don't mind I really rather be alone."

They exchanged glances again, even more concerned, before Ino moved first, hugging me before heading for the door.

"Okay then, see you around, hon'. Feel better," she said. Tenten and Hinata both hugged me and followed her example. Except Hinata paused before crossing the threshold to the outside world. She turned back to me, biting her bottom lip.

"I really am sorry," she said sincerely, her words pricking at my worn-out emotions. I nodded in acknowledgment. I had such a soft-spot for the sweetheart; it was ridiculous.

She walked out and closed the door behind her. Whatever. I pressed play on my T.V. remote and listened to Olive lecture on becoming a whore. That was about to be my only option if this shit didn't work itself out.

I heard my front door open and close. I didn't care, not even if it was an axe murderer or rapist. I had nothing to lose. Okay, maybe I would care a bit if I actually believed it. It was probably my mother coming home from work or something equally ordinary. I didn't really want to die yet. Damn if I was dying a virgin.

"Your door was unlocked," a voice said. I paused Never Been Kissed and looked up, worst fears realized. It was Karin, presumably arriving to gloat. I took a deep breath, reminding myself to think positive and act civilly. I mean, it could have been worse. It could have been Sasuke.

"Congratulations." I said sarcastically. No point in hiding my contempt now that the big secret was out.

"Look, it's not what you think." She claimed, trying to play it nice. I didn't want my feelings spared. I ignored her.

"Is he a good kisser?" I sounded tired, worn. Like a mother after labor. Like someone arising from a coma. I needed revitalization. "I've always wanted to know."

"I wouldn't know."

"What are you waiting for? We were never close, but Sasuke at least deserves a happy ending. I knew this was going to happen eventually. I just didn't foresee our friendship dissolving as a result. I never was very careful. Everyone figured it out before him. It's a wonder he never figured it out himself. I guess he just ignored what he didn't want to see."

"Look, obviously you want to talk about it with someone." She said somewhat sassily. I was beginning to suspect it wasn't personal so much as she always sounded like that. "It's cool, that's what I came for. I know how you feel."

"How would you know?" I wondered bitterly. "He loves you."

She took a seat next to me on my couch, which I resented. "I know how it feels not being able to unload on your friends about it. They're all happy with their wicked hot boyfriends while you're left alone. It gets lonely. And I know how it feels to have your emotions torn apart. Falling in love with the wrong people. Because there's nothing going on between Sasuke and me." She sounded sincere, albeit still a bit sassy. I almost let myself connect with her for a second.

"I saw the note, Karin." I said, the moment passing. "You don't have to lie about it. We aren't close enough that you need to salvage a connection or something."

"I talked to Sasuke about this note rumor. He said someone told him to give it to me. He said he didn't even read it."

"Maybe he chickened out." I suggested, groping for an explanation.

"Sasuke doesn't seem the chickening out type." She said. I knew that. I didn't believe it myself.

"It could be a pride thing—his failure with the note too much to admit."

"Yeah, he does seem like a pride person," she agreed. It was awkward for a moment. I felt uncomfortable discussing how well we knew Sasuke. I obviously knew him better, though that didn't make a difference to him. Besides, more time I spent acknowledging her as an actual person, the harder it was to muster up irrational dislike for my own benefit.

"Trust me," I said, asserting my knowledge of all things Sasuke. "He'd go to hell and back before compromising his pride."

"But I'm telling you it doesn't matter." She sounded exasperated, honest. I wasn't sure whether I wanted to believe her. "We aren't like that in the slightest. I don't even like him."

"Okay, now you're straight-up lying. You were all over him."

"I guess that's why you didn't like me so much, but I swear I didn't know. I just wanted to make…. someone jealous." Now she was sounding more unsure, vulnerable. It was making it that much harder to ignore her humanity.

"Someone." I repeated suspiciously. As if I was letting it go. Maybe it would have been easier for me to believe that they both liked each other so at least my massive blunder would have been worth something. But I was female and I wasn't going to let any gossip slip away.

"Okay, I'm telling you this in confidence, which probably isn't a good idea considering your attitude towards me as of late, but I can't tell the girls. They're too happy, they won't understand. I need to tell someone. You'll understand."

I narrowed my eyes, wondering if I should be assisting the enemy. "Okay…"

"Suigetsu and I have been kind of… involved." She said sheepishly. I could feel my eyes bugging out of my head.

"You're joking."

"It started out as sex." She continued, ignoring that I'd spoken. "Just sex. And it worked for a while, you know? I mean, I wasn't the relationship kind of girl, and he was the non-committal type of guy. So we figured what the hell. I mean, the sex was good and we weren't hurting anyone."

"Why are you telling me this?" I wondered, cynically. I was kind of jealous too. Suigetsu was just a friend, and I would never sleep with him because he was a shark, but he wasn't bad looking. Something about them being mutual friends kept it from being sleazy. Just scandalous. I wondered if she was feeling that sort of superiority that non-virgins felt around virgins. The thought irritated me. "Sui is the possessive type, even if it wasn't an official thing. I thought it was cute, so I started flirting with Sasuke. It was partly a game just to try and get a response from him, but mostly it was me making Sui a little upset. "

"Well, that was stupid." Hey, just because she decided to pour her heart out, didn't mean I was suddenly going to spare her feelings.

Instead of getting all defensive, she gave me a week smile, which I could respect but kind of made me feel like a bitch. "The thing is, as we kept seeing each other, Sui and I spent more and more time together. Sometimes going places before and after sex. Just hanging out. Steadily, he got more and more touchy about me flirting with Sasuke. I thought it meant he was actually starting to like me, for real, you know."

"So you broke it off?" I was starting to find myself getting into the story.

"No, I found myself not caring." She shrugged. "I was beginning to enjoy whatever we were."

"Okay, I don't see your problem." I was starting to get pissed again "You sound pretty happy to me."

"Then we got into an argument about Sasuke." She cast her eyes down, looking at her hands, fiddling with her fingers in her lap. "He called me a whore, slut, and some other shit. I probably deserved it. I was pretty low. I told him he was a bastard for getting all pissy even though we weren't supposed to be more the sex buddies. I told him I was never going to see him again if he didn't tell me he loved me. And he just stood there, blank face. I realized I screwed up—said the forbidden word. So I walked out before I could embarrass myself anymore."

"Wow. I couldn't tell." I was slightly disappointed my powers of female intuition had failed me. "You guys hid it pretty well."

"I guess we thought it was more fun that way." She admitted. "We both hated the drama."

"Sucks. I'm sorry." I bit my lip I didn't know what else to say.

"So I don't like Sasuke. Nothing's there. I don't know who it was from."

I took a deep sigh. "Thanks, but it doesn't matter. He still knows. And he still doesn't love me back."

There was an uncomfortable pause neither one of us entirely sure what came next. "Well, I guess I should be going. And thanks." She said. "You know, for listening. Even though you don't really like me."

She was barely up and out of her seat when I said, "You know there's still room on my sofa."

She looked back at me incredulously. "Really?"

"Yeah. At times like these, a girl needs her chick flicks." I pressed play again on the remote as she settled back. I guess I had no reason to dislike her anymore.

"Damn, I wish my English teacher was that hot." She said. I smiled to myself, silently agreeing. I almost saw a friendship coming on.

Talking with Karin made me realize how much I wanted to vent to someone. And more than just Karin because she was somehow wrapped up in it all. I wanted the thoughts of someone removed from the drama that I'd have no reservations pouring my heart out. So I did something I thought I'd never do. I actively sought out company. Luckily, I already had a volunteer to be subjected to the petty concerns of this teenage girl.

I called Kankuro, instantly reassured at the smile in his voice. Less than half an hour later we were sitting across from each other in the mall food court.

"Shouldn't you be in school?" He only asked as we settled down, taking a bite of his pizza. I gave him a sheepish smile.

"I'm sick." I said. He rolled his eyes.

"Obviously." He said with heavy sarcasm. Then he grinned. "So what's up?"

I shrugged. "I didn't want to go to school."

"That's because high school, by definition, sucks." He took another bite of pizza. "But if I remember correctly, you were the only one who thought schoolwork was fun. You were like a nerd, only hotter."

I tried not to let the compliment get to me, but it did considerably restore my self-esteem given my current emotional turmoil. "I have a problem."

"Well, yeah. Anyone who likes studying has a problem."

"No, I mean a real problem. Like, at school. Which is why I'm not going."

He blinked at me, face blank. "I'm listening."

I tried to explain without spitting my cheeseburger all over him, which was hard because the words seem to tumble out in a disorganized babble without rest. He was good at not interrupting me, and I was good at rambling my ass off. We made a good pair.

"Ah, high school drama," he said when I'd finished, slightly lightheaded but relieved to get my stupidity off my chest. "Wish I could say I missed it, but I'd have to be crazy."

I bit my lip. "So what do I do?"

"I—" he started, then held his tongue. I raised an eyebrow.

"Well?"

"I'm going to be completely honest with you, Sakura." He said gravely. "I knew nothing good would come from your infatuation with Sasuke."

I gave a sad smile. "Me too."

He looked sympathetic and I couldn't even feel bad about it. He got it right. I was pitiful.

"Let's blow this place." He rose from his chair. "Let's do something fun. That's the point of skipping school right?"

I followed in suit. "Sounds awesome."

We walked outside to where he parked the car. I walked along the raised curb between the parking lot and side walk.

"Ah," Kankuro said, noticing. "You're one of those."

"One of what?" I asked, trying to keep my balance.

"One of those people who liked to walk up on those things. You can tell a lot about people like that," he said.

"Like what?"

"The people who walk up there are the risk-takers. They like challenge. They're playful. The best kind."

I thought about that for a second. "I guess you're right."

"Sasuke wouldn't walk like that." He spoke softer. I supposed he was right.

"How about you?" I teased, trying to retain a playful air. He grinned and hopped up onto the curb with me.

"Bet I could go faster," he challenged.

"No way."

He grinned again. "Watch me."

"Let's kiss." I proposed impulsively a different date. Kankoru gave me one of those blank, incredulous stares. I was slightly offended; after all, he looked as if I'd just suggested we shoot up a 7-11 for the Slurpee's. Not that I'd be totally opposed to that idea either, but a sane person might. Sometimes I forgot they were still out there ruining it for the rest of us.

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" He asked in complete seriousness. I honestly couldn't see any reason for it to be a bad one.

"What harm can it do? I mean, what's an experimental kiss between friends? We're cool enough for it to not mess with anything right?"

"Well, no," he admitted, still not looking completely sold with the idea. "But what brought this on anyway? Spontaneous kissing just doesn't seem your thing."

I hesitated to explain. It was somewhat mortifying. "I haven't really kissed a guy before. Like, I have, but never since middle school, before I fell in love with the most inaccessible guy within a three-hundred mile radius. I mean, there have been a few drunken kisses I can't really remember and ploys to discover if Sasuke actually cared one way or another, but never a real, legitimate kiss with pure intentions with someone I care about."

He raised an eyebrow in skepticism. "You sure you want to waste it on me?"

"Who else am I gonna waste it on?" I wondered. I thought about the comfortable, protected calm I felt around him. "Besides, I really like you. If I wasn't strung out over someone else, I might have wanted a shot." He still looked at me like I was speaking gibberish. I continued, a bit miffed. "I mean, if you don't want to kiss me, I understand. I'm not exactly the hottest chick around and…"

I was cut off, a pair of lips crushing into mine, then softening into something gentle and completely new to me. My lips parted by themselves and played along like they were born to. Firm hands placed themselves on my waist and I snaked my arms around his back, fingers resting on his shoulder blades. It was slow and sweet and planted vines in my stomach that curled and pressed against my sides in attempts at escape.

It was a while before he pulled away, because I wasn't going to stop it.

"You're drop dead, babe. " He pulled my head to his chest. "Good kisser too. I'll be here whenever you get over him."

We stayed like that for a bit. I listened to his heartbeat, thinking how I'd never felt more appreciated by a boy in my life.

So maybe I can kinda see why Mel dislikes Sakura. These guys are idiots. The great part about idiotic characters is that if you REALLY want to, you can bash their heads in. In real life you'd get yourself arrested or some shit.