Chapter 4- Samantha
My god what is wrong with Eric he just seems to keep bothering me today. I mean first he shows up here unannounced, then he ruins a very steamy kiss between me and my boss. I mean god he has some nerve. To top it off he's calling right now.
Its really kind of funny because mine and Jude's phone rang at the exact same time. Anyway focus back to my ringing phone
"Hello Eric" I said picking up my phone.
"Diana listen to me we really need to talk."
"You have no right to call me Diana you lost that right when you stopped talking to me because I was pregnant."
"God Samantha would you shut up and listen to me for a minute." I heard Eric's voice grow louder and angrier.
"Ok Eric Que paso?" (whats wrong)
"I really need to speak to you it's important meet me inside Darius's office in 20 minutes.Please."
Before I could even protest Eric hung up on me.
My god what can be so important that he is coming back here to speak to me. None the less why does he want to meet in Darius's office.
Since Jude was still on the phone I couldn't talk to her and seeing the hurtful expression in her eyes I doubt if she wants to be bothered.
So I pulled out my i-pod and turned on some music so Jude wont think I am trying to listen to her obviously private conversation.
I turned on my newly favorite song. 'I Wonder' by Kellie Pickler.
Listening to this song I could hear the hurt in her voice and some of the anger she has towards her mother.
Sometimes I think about you.
Wonder if you're out there somewhere thinkin' about me.
And would you even recognize,
The woman that your little girl has grown up to be.
Cuz I look in the mirror and all I see,Are your brown eyes looking back at me.
They're the only thing you ever gave to me at all.
Oh I hear the weather's nice in California. There's sunny skies as far as I can see.
If you ever come back home to Carolina.
I wonder what you'd say to me.
I think about how it ain't fair.
That you weren't there to braid my hair like mothers do.
You weren't around to cheer me on.
Help me dress for my high school prom like mothers do.
Did you think I didn't need you here.
To hold my hand, to dry my tears.
Did you even miss me through the years at all?
God I don't know what I would do if I really did abandon Natalia and never made contact with her ever again. I don't think I could handle having a daughter I knew hated me so much for giving her up. Thank god I have people in mine and her life who would never let that happen.
Oh I hear the weather's nice in California. There's sunny skies as far as I can see.
If you ever come back home to Carolina.
I wonder what you'd say to me.
Forgiveness.
Such a simple word.
But its so hard to do.
When you've been hurt.
Oh I hear the weather's nice in California.
And just in case you're wondering about me.
From now on I won't be in Carolina
Your little girl is off...
Your little girl is off...
Your little girl is off to Tennessee
When the song was finished I turned around and noticed Jude was looking at me. It was after the song had ended when I realized I was singing along with the song. I pulled off my headphones and spoke to her.
"Is everything ok Jude you look like you just spoke to a ghost your all pale."
"It's Tommy. He told me..." Jude stopped as she wiped a tear from her eyes.
"What? What did he tell you?"
"That he loves me and he'll be back home soon."
"Well Jude thats wonderful isn't that what you wanted?"
"I don't know if I'm ready to face him. I mean he hurt me so much and he left 2 years ago all suddenly and I havent heard from him since. Now all of a out of nowhere he is calling me and telling me he loves me. I really don't know how I'm suppose to feel. At first I waited for the day he would say those three little words that would make my life whole and now that I hear them I don't feel any different. If anything I feel more angry."
I nodded. I totally understood where Jude was coming from. Well not really because Eric has never told me those words. Oh wait yeah he did but the way he meant it was as friends only.
"I wish I was in your shoes right now Jude"
Jude looked at me in complete shock.
"Wait." I laughed. "I mean that if Eric came up to me or even called me and professed his love for me. There is not enough anger in the world that would stop me from leaping into his arms and kissing him. I seriously ache for the day he'll feel the same way about me as I do him. So Jude you should count your blessings because you my friend are lucky. Now as for me I have a meeting with Eric in Darius's office so I'll see you in a few."
We said our goodbyes and I left to go to Darius's office.
I knocked on the door and waited for the invitation to come in. 3 seconds later I heard Darius yell its open and I come in and closed the door.
When I got into the room I noticed Eric and Darius weren't the only one's there. Karma and Mason where there as well with big smiles on there faces.
"D whats going on?" I asked
"Come Samantha sit down. We need to talk."
I took the seat closer to Darius only because it was the only one available. But before I could sit down he pulled the seat closer to him. I wasn't the only one who noticed he did that. Eric noticed to and I saw in his eyes he was angry.
Seeing that I noticed he got angry Eric looked away from me and looked at Karma and Mason. As soon as I sat down Darius started speaking.
"Ok the reason why you all are here is because. Eric here is Karma and Mason's new producer."
"Que? Ta loco?"(What? You crazy) I said forgetting that only me and Eric spoke spanish.
"Excuse me?" Darius said.
"She said what are you crazy?" said Eric with a smile
"Thank you Eric but I don't need you to be my damn translator. Any way." I said turning to face him. "Is this why you called me here?"
"Well this is part of it. The other part we need to speak about in private. But um Samantha I'm going to need a place to stay."
"Oh no!!! No no no. Ta loco.(You Crazy) you are not staying with me Thalia will be here in 2 days and I just started to move on from you and now your telling me you need a place to stay. Tell me why should I let you stay with me. So I could fall in love with you again and then you turn around and break my heart right after I tell you how I feel."
"Wait before you answer her Eric. Karma and Mason do you guys have any questions for your new producer?"
"None that we can think of." They told him.
"Alright then go to your studio's and when Eric's done here you guys can start working on your songs."
"Ok. Bye Samantha." Karma said to me with a sorry smile. I waved as her and Mason left.
"Dimelo Rico." (Tell me Rich)
Eric smiled at me as he realized I used my own personal nickname for him.
"You should let me stay with you because-"
He stopped talking. My god how I hate when he does that. But then again he looks so cute when he's nervous.
"Ok Eric stop stalling tell her what you need to tell her."
I turned around and stared at Darius. I have never been more confused in my life. And just as I was about to stay something to Darius Eric said something I never thought I would hear him say.
I turned to him as if he were a stranger whom I've never seen before.
"Wha- What did you just say to me?"
"I said you should let me stay with you because I love you." He said as he started to walk towards me.
"No you don't Eric please don't do this. Don't get my hopes up by telling me you love me and then when you find someone new you throw me to side like im yesterday's news."
"Diana." He said as he grabbed my hands." I'm not lieing and I'm not getting your hopes up to shoot them down. I really do love you. All those times when I told you I didn't love you I lied. I lied because I wasn't sure if what I was feeling for you is real."
"No I'm not going to go through this again. You want me to believe you love me your going to have to prove it." and with that I stormed out of Darius's office.
When I got into studio D Jude was dancing and singing along with my i-pod. I leaned against the door enterance and started laughing.
She did a turn and saw me laughing.
"Sorry I was just so bored."
"It's ok what's mine is yours." I said as the smile disappeared from my face.
"Samantha you alright?"
"No. Remember a few minutes ago when I told you I would love it if Eric said he loved me."
"Yeah"
"Well he did and asked if he could stay with me. But instead of me being happy I was just like you and I got angry. And I told him if he really loved me he was going to have to prove it."
"Wow. We really are alike aren't we. It's like you're my long lost spanish twin."
I started to laugh. "Yeah maybe I am. Look I'll see you tomorrow. I think I had enough drama for the day."
"Alright see you tomorrow Sam." Jude said to me.
"Bye Jude." With that I grabbed my purse and walked out to the street. I slowly got in my car, turned it on and drove home.
Jude
I can not believe how much drama one day can have. First, Shay returns, Then all the drama with Samantha, and Finally my conversations with Tommy.
What did he mean he was coming back soon. How soon?
Oh god look at me I'm going crazy wondering about Tommy. God he's fucking doing it again.
How can a simple conversation with Tommy. Get me all crazy again.
I hate the affect this man has on me. Once again my phone goes off. I look at the caller id and see that its Sadie. A sigh of relief escaped my lips.
"Yeah Sadie."
"Dad and Yvette are arguing again. I'm going to be at Qwest's house tonight so I'll see you tomorrow."
"Alright Thanks for the heads up Sadie. I'll see you tomorrow."
God could this day get any worse. Now Yvette and dad are fighting that means I'm gonna stay at the rehearsal space tonight.
Ohh I have an idea to make my night there fun.
I pick up my cell phone and call Jamie. First I apologize to him for not being able to hang out. Then I tell him dad and Yvette are fighting again and for him to meet me at the rehearsal so we can chill.
After I hang up with him I call Speed, Wally , Kyle, Samantha, Mason and Karma and tell them all to meet me at the rehearsal space.
Samantha told me she'll be there a little later. That first she needed to call and speak to Eric. I knew exactly what was going to happen. She was going to tell him he could stay with her.
When I got to the rehearsal space I was surprised to find Pasty there writing a new song and singing.
"Blondie!" she screamed as she got up and hugged me.
"Hey Pats what are you doing here?"
"Well I knew you still had this place and since my car got wrecked from the car accident I had last year I needed a place to stay and I knew you wouldn't mind so I came here."
"Oh thats great Pats but are you up for some company because I have the guys, Karma, Samantha and Jamie coming here to hang out."
"Jamie?!"
Damn it I forgot her and Jamie had ended their relationship on bad terms last year.
"Yeah are you ok with that."
"Sure yeah I'm fine it will be good to see Jamie again."
"Ok good."
An hour later the rehearsal studio was bumping with music and laughter. But there was still no sign of Samantha and just as I was about to call her again she comes strolling into the rehearsal studio with none other then Eric.
I saw her run up to me with open arms and I opened mine too.
"I am so sorry I'm late" She says as she hugs me. "It's just that I had to search practially all of downtown Toronto to find Eric then I found him in this cheap hotel across from G-Major."
"It's ok. What matters is that your hear now." I told her and she smiles.
"LOOK everyone Sam's hear." I screamed and everyone came and hugged Samantha.
"Dude who's that?" Speed asked pointing to the door.
"Oh well thats mine and Mason's producer Eric Delko." Karma replied as she kissed Speed on the lips.
"Oh so why's he here?" Asked Wally.
"Because he is here with me now if you all can stop asking 21 questions can we please party." Said Samantha. I heard she was some what irritated and it made me laugh.
God this girl really can be my twin.
An hour and a half later. I looked at Samantha and noticed she changed her out fit. Now she was wearing a blue denim skirt with a black halter top and the same tall black boots from earlier.
I walked over to her and laughed.
"Whats up."
"I see you had time to change your clothes." I told her.
"Oh no when you called me I just got out the shower and I really wasn't going to put on the same clothes so I put this out fit on."
"Well I have to say your hot." I said laughing.
"Why thank you." she said bowing making me laugh some more.
"Hey Pats." I called wondering where she went.
"Yeah." I heard her call from an upstairs room.
"Come down I want to hear the song you wrote earlier."
"Alright I'll be down in a minute."
I started laughing because I knew exactly what she was doing up there and with who. I saw Jamie was no where in sight. Go figure I just played matchmaker and didn't even notice.
Minutes later Pasty and Jamie came back downstairs and she started singing her song.
"This song is called "Weight Of The World"
Feels like the weight of the world,
Like God in heaven gave me a turn.
Don't cling to me, I swear I can't fix you.
Still in the dark, can you fix me?
Freefall, freefall, all through life.
If you love me, then let go of me.
I won't be held down by who I used to be.
She's nothing to me.
Feels like the weight of the world,
Like all my screaming has gone unheard.
And oh, I know you don't believe in me.
Safe in the dark, how can you see?
Freefall, freefall, all through life.
If you love me, then let go of me.
I won't be held down by who I used to be.
If you love me, then let go of me
I won't be held down by who I was
If you love me, then let go of me
I won't be held down by who I used to be
"Woooo." we all screamed when Patsy was done. "Pats that song is going to be a hit mark my words." I said hugging her.
"Thanks Blondie. I'ma present it to Qwest in the morning right now I'm tried and I need to sleep."
"Yeah we all need to sleep." Said Jamie
That was it party over. Everyone left 15 minutes later except for me, Jamie and Patsy. We all fell asleep around the couch on the main floor.
Samantha
Jude really can throw a killer party. I haven't had that much fun in a while. I started to walk towards my jeep with Eric and for the first time in a while he was quiet.
He didn't have a little flirtatious remark for what I was wearing nor did he say anything about how I spent at least an hour talking to Wally and Kyle. He was just silent.
I climbed into the drivers side of my Jeep and he climbed into the passenger side. Then I started the car and drove off.
I turned on the radio and squealed. My all time favorite song was blasting through my speakers.
It was Mary J Blige's 'I'm Goin Down'. God I love that song.
I turned the radio up more and started to sing along.
Time on my hands
Since you been away boy
I ain't got no plans
No no no no
And the sound of the rain
Against my windowpane
Is slowly, is slowly drivin' me insane, boy
I'm goin' down
I'm goin' down
Cause you ain't around baby
My whole world's upside down
Sleep don't come easy
Boy please believe me
Since you been goneEverything's goin' wrong
Why'd you have to say goodbye
Look what you've done to me
I can't stop these tears from fallin' from my eyes
Ooh baby
I'm goin' down
I'm goin' down
Cause you ain't around baby
My whole world's upside down
Oooh baby love
goin' down, goin' down
Mmm ooh I'm goin' down
Ooh I, I...
I'm goin' down
I'm goin' down
Cause you ain't around baby
My whole world's upside down
Ooh, goin' down
Goin' down
Oh, I don't know what to do
If I ever lose you
I'll be goin' down
I said I'll be goin' down
Oh, please forgive me baby
I'm so sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry
What did I do wrong?
I said, what did I do wrong?
Please forgive me baby
And come on home
Goin' down, goin' down, goin' down
When the song finished I looked at Eric who seemed lost in his own world.
"What is wrong with you."
"Huh?" God I hate when he says that he knows damn well he heard me.
"What is wrong with you?"
"Nothing why."
"Because you're a little too quiet thats why."
"It's nothing I'm just thinking thats all."
"What ever."
I turned into my driveway and shut off the engine.
"When your finished thinking you can come into the house."
I walked into my house and kicked off my shoes.
When I was inside the kitchen I heard my door slam and someone stomping into the kitchen.
"Eric you must of lost your fucking mind slamming doors like you live here and shit."
He didn't answer instead he violently turned me around and had my back pinned against the counter.
He was inches away from my face and I was forced to look into his eyes.
When I turned my face he just grabbed my chin and made me stare at him again.
"Look into my eyes Samantha."
I yelped out in pain as his grip on my chin got harder.
Suddenly he let my chin go and I wiped away the tear that fell from my eyes.
"Samantha look at me. Can't you see I love you. You mean more to me than anything else in the world. I knew I loved you when you told me you were pregnant. Thats why i stopped speaking to you because I couldn't image you giving birth to another mans child. Every single day I cursed my self because I knew that Thalia was suppose to be my baby but I was just too stubborn to see what was right in front of my face all this time."
I was completely speechless. When I opened my mouth to say something nothing came out. So Eric continued talking.
" When I heard you left it was like my heart broke into billions of pieces. I cried for days and blamed myself constantly for your departure. Months went past and then I got a call from a Darius Mills. He told me he heard how good of a producer I was and if I wanted a job producing two instant stars in Toronto. I took the job. I went to Noel's the day before I left and questioned him about where you went. He wasn't giving me any answers. So I made him really angry by telling him Natalia was suppose to be my baby. And after I said those simple words he told me you left for Toronto. The perfect oppritunity i told my self as I packed my bags and left to come here a few days early. When I landed in Toronto airport I went to starbucks and got a coffee. Then I noticed a magazine that cought my eye. It had you on it and at the bottom it said "Meet G-Major's newest star". My mouth completely dropped. I knew you took my advise about making it big and here you are. Making it big because of all my advice and helping with your singing. I gave you your voice. I knew you could do it and I'm proud of you and I really love you and that is what I came here to tell you."
Finally I got my voice back.
"Helped me with my singing, gave me my voice, you love me. Thats all a bunch of shit. Look Eric I don't care what your eyes say to me. What matters is what your heart says and from the sound of your voice you meant none of it. So until you do I'm going to my room. Your room is in the basement. It's nice and cozy so have fun."
The nerve of that bitch! To tell me he helped me with my singing, He gave me my voice, that it was his advice that got me to where I am right now. Is he completely crazy. I'll admit it is because of him I'm a star but its not for the reason he thinks it is.
"Ugh!" I screamed when I got in my room.
I just couldn't take it any more. I opened my purse got out my journal and started writing.
Listen,
I am alone at a crossroads
I'm not at home, in my own home
And I tried and tried
To say whats on my mind
You should have known
Oh,
Now I'm done believing you
You don't know what I'm feeling
I'm more than what, you made of me
I followed the voice
you gave to me
But now I gotta find, my own..
That song is perfect all I need to do is add more bridges and it should be good. Oh I cannot wait. But as of right now I am soo tired so I'm going to sleep. Goodnight.
A/N: Songs in this chapter. "I Wonder" By Kellie Pickler. "Weight of the world" Evanescence, "I'm Goin Down" Mary J Blige and the chorus to "Listen" By Beyonce. Please Review I live for reviews.