Love Is Never Painless

by Samantha Diana

This story is about 2 girls. Samantha and Jude. Samantha is a new instant star going through the same troubles as Jude.Losing the one you love is never easy.BUT coming back isn't either. What happens to Jude and Samantha when their true loves come back

17. Time To Start Over

Chapter 17 - Samantha

I haven't stopped crying since I left G-Major. I never in a millions years would of thought that Eric would say all those hurtful things to me.

He told me he didn't love me and those words just flew through my heart like daggers.

When I got to the house I wasn't really shocked to find that he wasn't there.

So since he wasn't there I found it as a perfect opportunity to start packing. He wants me gone so that's what he's going to get. I'm packing everything that I brought into that house and I'm taking it back to New York with me.

I called U-Haul and ordered their extra big truck and told them my final destination. They told me how much it would be and how long it would take to get to my house.

So in the mean time while im waiting for the movers and the truck to get here. I went to my shed and got out my can's of white paint.

Since I was leaving I was going to leave my house to Eric only because I knew he didn't have any place else to go.

And because I was leaving the house to him I was going to erase all traces of me and Natalie ever being here. So that means destroying my studio that I was building and painting over Natalie's light pink walls.

As soon as I entered the house I started getting everything done and by the time the movers came Natalia's room was complete.

They just walked right in and announced their presence.

I told them they can start with the living room and with Natalia's room contents that was already outside waiting on the lawn.

I went into my room and started packing all my clothes. I even took off the sheets that were currently on my bed and then placed brand new ones with a new comforter on a chair so he can put them on when he returns home. Finally my room was done all of my belongings were out of their. My dresser, my TV, my clothes and all the pictures of me, Eric, and Natalia.

The kitchen wasn't touched because basically he needed pots and pans to cook with and plates, fork and spoons to eat with.

I glanced around my house and everything was gone. It looked the same way it did when I first moved in.

Before I dismantled my studio I called the guys over one last time so they can help me record one last song. It will be for Eric and probably go onto my first and last album.

A half an hour later the guys came. Jude and Sadie still had tears in their eyes while everyone else seemed a little angry.

We all walked up the steps and I showed them what my studio was starting to look like before I decided to leave.

I was the same size as studio D. it had a sound booth. The sound proof window, and the mixing board.

After a few minutes Tommy finally spoke.

"So do you have a song and does this equipment work?"

"Yes I have a song and yes all this works."

"Ok so get into the booth and get comfortable while we get this ready." he said while pointing to him, Kwest, and Jude.

I went into the room with my guitar and journal and placed my journal on the podium under the mic. After a few more minutes Jude's voice came through my headphones.

"Ready Diana."

"As ready as I'll ever be." I said as a little smirk tugged at the side of my lips.

"Alright whats the name of your song." she asked

"'Home'." (By Chris Daughtry)

Tommy placed his hand in the air and started counting down from 5. As soon as he hit one. I started strumming my guitar.

After a few chords I started to sing with so much passion that I even impressed myself.

An hour later the song was finish.

I wrote Eric a letter and placed it along with one copy of the CD on the island in the kitchen for him to see when he comes back. I also placed my house keys and a picture of him and Natalie there too. Because no matter how much he deny's it he loves her to death just as much as she love him.

I gave all my studio equipment to Jude since she always wanted a studio of her own.

Dismantling the room wasn't so hard because the guys helped me. The sound proof window was really the hardest part because the damn thing was so heavy.

I painted the room really quick with the help of Sadie and now I was done. And it was really time to leave.

The movers were waiting outside after they made a special trip to Jude's to drop off the equipment and everyone else all said their goodbyes one more time.

"Sam wait. About the comment you made to Darius earlier. The one about the abortion. Your not really going to go through with it are you." Jude asked me with the sadness evident in her voice.

"No I'm not. I don't believe in it. And besides there is a chance that the baby might be Eric's and if it is, he or she will be the only memory I have left of him. I said that to Darius so he wouldn't sue for custody I also told Eric in that letter I left him so he wont think he abandoned his responsibilities. You guys are the only ones who know so please don't tell anyone. I'm sorry guys but I really have to go I don't wanna risk Eric catching me still here. Will you guys make sure he gets the letter and cd?"

"We will. Remember invite us to your shower. Where ever you'll be." Jude said.

"I will. so you guys are gonna stay here until he comes right."

"Yeah but there's no furniture or tv." Kwest stated with a smirk

"There are still chairs near the island in the kitchen and there's food in the cabinet. So eat, talk and wait for him to come. Bye."

I got into my car and started the engine. I waved one last time as I backed out of the drive way.

Everyone stayed on the front lawn and watched me pull out.

Jude and Sadie were crying into Tommy and Kwest's chest while the guys wiped a few tears away from their eyes as well.

"Bye I love you." I yelled as I took off down the street. Not once did I look back.

It's time. Time to start over again by myself with me and my children.

Narrator

After Samantha was finally out of sight everyone went back into the house and sat in the kitchen.

"I can't believe she's gone." Jude said quietly.

"It's all because of what that bastard Eric said to her and I swear if she didn't love him so much I would kill him." Tommy fumed.

And as if he heard them talking about him Eric walked furiously through the door.

"SAMANTHA!!" he yelled through the house. He was about to yell again when he noticed the living room was empty.

He looked around and seen everything that Sam brought into the house was gone. He quickly ran up to 'their' room and also found it vacant.

He walked out afraid and went into Natalia's room and found all her things gone as well and her pink walls replaced by white ones.

She left. He thought as he walked over to her favorite part of the house. Her studio.

He walked in slowly and looked around at the room that was once her studio.

"She left." Jude said from behind him causing him to jump.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN SHE LEFT. WHERE THE HELL DID SHE GO." he yelled.

"Watch your tone of voice with her Delko your already on thin ice with me and you really don't want to piss me off more." Tommy said calmly when he appeared from behind Jude.

"What ever man. Where did she go." he replied with his tone of voice taken down a couple of notches.

"Here. She explains it all in the letter. Also she wants you to hear the song she wrote." Sadie said as she handed the stuff to Eric.

"She also left this and this." Kwest said handing him the keys and picture.

Eric looked at everything in his hands and then looked back up at the people in front of him.

"WHY THE HELL DIDN'T ANY OF YOU STOP HER." he yelled again this time with pain in his voice.

"We tried. But apparently your words hurt her more than her pride. Read the letter listen to the song she explains everything. We only stayed here because we promised we'd make sure you got the stuff and now that you did its time for us to go and live our lives with one less member of our family." Jude stated coldly as they all left 'the studio' and went home.

Eric went to his car and placed the CD inside the player and paused it so he could read the letter.

Dear Eric.

I know I'm the last person you want to hear from right now but I decided to write you this letter and tell you the reason for my recent action. Earlier today you told me to leave and to stay away from you. So you got your wish. I left. Don't try and find me because I simply don't wanna be found. You can keep my house since it's paid for. I took out everything that was mine and erased all traces of me and Natalie ever being there.

The whole situation with me and Darius is, well was complicated. It was just a one time thing that got a little out of control. Well insanely out of control considering my current situation. And about the baby. There is no need for you to worry about it. It's all being taken care of. I have an appointment as soon as I get to New York for an abortion. I know what your thinking, I wouldn't do it because I don't believe in it. But right now I have to. I am not strong enough to raise 2 children by myself. I just got out of depression, my mom and I are fighting because of her new boyfriend and grandfather is always busy with court cases. I just can't do it.

I want you to know that I do love you and I don't ever want you to forget that. You were my once upon a time love and I will never forget you no matter how hard I try. But I'm going to have to because you made it pretty clear that you don't love me, Natalia or this baby. And although it pained me to hear you say that I knew deep down inside a part of you really meant it no matter how much you blame it on your anger. I saw it in your eyes and heard it in your voice.

Anyway I let you keep my house memory free. It's completely empty of my belongings so please don't go around looking for anything to burn because you wont find it. Just think of it as if I never existed. Forget about me because as of this moment I'm trying my hardest to forget about you. Although my attempts are getting no where. I love you Eric Anthony Delko and I don't want you to doubt that for a second. You'll always hold a special place in my heart no matter what. I'll miss you.

Please after you read this listen to the song it will tell you my true feelings.

With All My Love,

Your Beautiful Musician.

Eric finished the letter and then pressed play on the cd player. He then laid back closed his eyes and listened. A few seconds later the car was blasting with the sound of Sam's guitar and voice.

I'm staring out into the night,
Trying to hide the pain.
I'm going to the place where love
And feeling good don't ever cost a thing.
And the pain you feel's a different kind of pain.
Well I'm going home,
Back to the place where I belong,
And where your love has always been enough for me.
I'm not running from.
No, I think you got me all wrong.
I don't regret this life I chose for me.
But these places and these faces are getting old,
So I'm going home.
Well I'm going home.

The miles are getting longer, it seems,
The farther I get from you.
I've not always been the best woman or friend for you.
But your love, it makes true.
And I don't know why.
You always seem to give me another try.

So I'm going home,
Back to the place where I belong,
And where your love has always been enough for me.
I'm not running from.
No, I think you got me all wrong.
I don't regret this life I chose for me.
But these places and these faces are getting old,

Be careful what you wish for,
'Cause you just might get it all.
You just might get it all,
And then some you don't want.
Be careful what you wish for,
'Cause you just might get it all.
You just might get it all, yeah.

Oh, well I'm going home,
Back to the place where I belong,
And where your love has always been enough for me.
I'm not running from.
No, I think you got me all wrong.
I don't regret this life I chose for me.
But these places and these faces are getting old.
I said these places and these faces are getting old,
So I'm going home.
I'm going home.

The song finished almost 4 minutes later and Eric was just about to turn it off when Sam's voice came through the speakers.

"Wait.. Don't turn the cd off yet. I have one more song for you to hear I recorded it when everyone left to the kitchen and after you listen to it you can break, burn, or throw away this cd if you want. This song is called 'I Will Always Love You'." (By: Whitney Houston)

If I
Should stay
I would only be in your way
So I'll go
But I know
I'll think of you every step of
the way

And I...
Will always
Love you, oohh
Will always
Love you
You
My darling you
Mmm-mm

Bittersweet
Memories
That is all I'm taking with me
So good-bye
Please don't cry
We both know I'm not what you
You need

And I...
Will always love you
I...
Will always love you
You, ooh

Instrumental / Sax solo

I hope
life treats you kind
And I hope
you have all you've dreamed of
And I wish you joy and happiness
But above all this
I wish you love

And I...
Will always love you
I...
Will always love you
Repeat

I, I will always love
You...
You
Darling I love you
I'll always
I'll always
Love
You..
Oooh
Ooohhh

The whole time all Eric did was cry. Because no matter how much he denied it. He really did love her. And he knew getting over her wasn't going to be easy.

Over at Jude and Tommy's house...

Jude hadn't said one word since she left Eric's house. Tommy didn't either. They were both preoccupied in their own thoughts about Sam to even speak.

Finally after an hour Jude spoke to Tommy.

"Can we start putting my studio together I want to record the song I wrote for Sam a couple of months ago."

"Sure come on." he said with a faint smile. At least singing would get their minds to stop thinking about Sam.

After pulling an all nighter and practically an all morning job the studio was finally finished.

Will the help of Kwest, SME, Mason, Jude and Tommy's old band mate Chaz. Everything was all set-up and in working order. Even the soundproof glass was installed. It didn't have to be cut or nothing it fit in perfectly.

"Thanks guys." Jude said while hugging everyone.

"No problem dude. We all knew how much you wanted a studio of your own and now you have one. A place of your own with no interruptions." Speid smiled.

Jude was about to give Speid a hug with there was a knock on her door.

Jude quickly ran down thinking it was Samantha and flung the door open. Her smile went into an even bigger one when she seen who it really was.

"Hello I was wondering if you would help me. I'm looking for my best friend and the father of my child I heard they were both here putting a studio together." She smiled

"KARMA!!" Jude screamed. "Oh my god when did you get back." she asked and they hugged.

"I just got here and went to G-Major to see you guys when Sadie said ya'll were all here."

"Vincent get your ass down here.. Someone is here to see you." Jude yelled while everyone ran down the steps.

"Jude baby. Whats wro-" Tommy asked paranoid his sentence was cut short when he saw Karma in the doorway with a little blue car seat in her hands.

"Dude why are you yelling?" Speid asked finally getting downstairs. He looked at the doorway and rubbed his eyes thinking he was seeing things. "Babe is that really you?" he questioned with tears in his eyes.

"Yes Speidy it's me." she smiled.

Speiderman practically pushed everyone out of the way to get to Karma and once he did he gave her the most passionate kiss he could give and then looked down at his beautiful little boy sleeping.

"Aww Kar is that little Michael" Jude asked sweetly.

"Yes it is. Everyone I would like to introduce you all to Michael Vincent Speiderman."

Everyone aww'ed at little Michael and went into Jude's living room to catch Karma up on some of the things that happened since she left.

Jude started by telling Karma about Samantha being her sister.

"So Samantha is mine and Sadie's sister and me and her are pregnant and due around the same time."

"That's wonderful. By the way where is Samantha I want her to see Michael."

Suddenly the room went quiet.

"Ok am I missing something" she asked very confused.

"Um Samantha went home due to family issues." Jude whispered.

"Well is she coming back soon."

Jude shook her head 'no'.

"Darius terminated her contract yesterday. She'll be back over the holidays and for mine and Sadie's wedding.."

"Why did he do that?"

Jude seemed to be getting annoyed with the questions so Tommy answered.

"She wanted him to." he said and gave Karma a 'please drop it' glance.

"Oh well I spoke to Darius and he said my contract was still good." she smiled.

"That's great Kar. Um Tommy can we record my song now."

"Sure come on guys lets show Karma the studio."

Everyone walked upstairs to the room and took a seat in a different part of the studio so they can hear Jude record.

Jude went into the booth and got ready to sing. She sat on the stool and waited from her fiancee to give her the signal.

And as soon as he did she started to sing the song as if it would be the last time she would ever be able to do it.

(A/N: Song is 'Count On Me' By Whitney Houston and CeCe Winans)

Count on me through thick and thin
A friendship that will never end
When you are weak
I will be strong
Helping you to carry on
Call on me, I will be there
Don't be afraid
Please believe me when I say
Count on...

I can see it's hurting you
I can feel your pain
It's hard to see the sunshine through the rain
I know sometimes it seems as if
It's never gonna end
But you'll get through it
Just don't give in cuz you can

Count on me through thick and thin
A friendship that will never end
When you are weak
I will be strong
Helping you to carry on
Call on me, I will be there
Don't be afraid
Please believe me when I say
Count on...
You can count on me
Oh yes you can

Oo, I know sometimes it seems as if
We're standing all alone
But we'll get through it
Cuz love won't let us fall

Count on me (count on me, I'll be there) through thick and thin
A friendship that will never end
When you are weak
I will be strong (I'll be strong)
Helping you to carry on (yes, you know)
Call on me, I will be there
Don't be afraid
Please believe me when I say
Count on...
Count on...

There's a place inside all of us
Where our faith in love begins
You should reach to find the truth in love
The answers' there within, oh
I know that life can make you feel
It's much harder than it really isBut we'll get through it (we'll get through it)
(Just) Just (don't) don't give in

Count on me (count on me) through thick and thin
A friendship that will never end (it'll never end)
When you are weak (you)
I will be strong (I will be strong)
Helping you to carry on
Call on me, I will be there
Don't be afraid (don't be afraid now)
Please believe me when I say
Count on
Count on
Count on
Count on
Count on
Count on me
Oh yes you can
I know I can
Yes you can
Well
So glad I can, count on me

After 45 minutes the song was sung and mixed. Now it was time for everyone to head to G-Major.

Well not everyone. Tommy had to attach the song's file to an email and send it to the New York radio station Z100 to play with a special message to Samantha.

Hey Elvis Duran and the Z100 Zoo,

Tommy Quincy here with Jude Harrison's newest song. Count On Me. When ever you play this song Jude requested that you dedicate this song to a special someone. The person knows who she is..

Thanks Guys.

Tom Quincy.

He sent the song and then headed to G-Major.

A/n: Hey everyone I just wanted to make one thing clear. I am totally against abortions but I made Samantha tell Eric and Darius that for a reason. You'll see in later chapters what I mean. And starting in the next chapter I will start moving by months. Like this one is October Chapter 18 will be November and so on... I Hope you liked this chapter. And I'm crossing my fingers that all 17 people that have this story as an alert will review.. Because I live for reviews.

You Guys Rock

Diana.