Disclaimer: I don't own any of these boys.
Katie's pov
Logan was not acting his usual dorky self. I knew Kendall was too dumb to ask, so I took it into my own hands.
We were all in the pool and while the others were either in the pool or flirting with girls, I walked over to Logan.
"Kendall and the others are distracted so you have ten minutes to tell me what's wrong." I said, looking down at my watch.
Logan looked up from his homework. "Huh?"
"Look, I know there's something wrong, you're not too good at hiding it...from me. So spill. What's up?" I asked, choosing my words.
"I..." Logan sighed and looked at me. "You're not going to leave me alone are you?" He asked. I shook my head before he even asked. "Fine, I...do you think I'm a better doctor than singer?" He asked.
"What?" I stared at him. "Logan, if you were a bad singer, Gustavo would throw you out just like that," I snapped my fingers.
Logan smiled at me, but shook his head. "Kendall would never let him do that."
I paused, because that was true. "Logan," I sat down next to him. "If Gustavo knew that was going to happen do you really think that would stop him?"
He shook his head.
"Exactly. He would scream and promise to never have you in the studio again, but in the end Kendall would win. He always does." He looked down, thoughtfully. "The point is, if Gustavo had thought of kicking you out, they would've done it already." I breathed in. "What else?"
Logan smiled. "You really are smart aren't you?"
"Just wait until I'm 15, I'll be smarter than you and people will take me seriously." I shrugged. It was the truth. Right now, everyone thought I was cute and adorable. Maybe when I grew up, if I was still cute and adorable I would make idiots of a bunch of boys.
"That's true." Logan sighed. "Everyone thought that Wayne Wayne would take me out instead of Kendall." He pointed out. "Gustavo doesn't have to say that I'm a bad singer, because every one else does."
"Who's everyone else?" I asked, now angry.
Logan shook his head fast. "No one, nothing. I didn't say anything." He said, quickly.
"Tell me, Logan. You don't want me to get the others involved."
He sighed. "A...look, I just get the feeling that I'm not really that great with people." He said.
I narrowed my eyes. "Not good with people?"
"You have any idea how Mom and Kelly love you. Camille loves you. Every fan of Big Time Rush will say that they liked you if they met you in person. You have a gift with people." I said.
"Oh yeah, what's that?" Logan asked, not convinced.
"You make people comfortable." I pointed out.
"So do the others." Logan argued.
"You help other people." I tried with that.
"So does every one in the world." Logan retorted.
I rolled my eyes. "You're annoyingly smart." I said, bitterly.
Logan looked away, sad, but I didn't let that stop me from what I said next, "And I admire, it makes you my role model."
Logan looked at me surprised. "What?"
"Mom will always be the a role model to me, yes. Kendall will always be my caring older brother, but you teach me that you don't have to be smart to be cool." I smiled. "You're both, but you get my point."
Logan smiled sadly, and began to shake his head. I waited for him to argue back, but instead he hugged me and pulled me close.
"I've been so stupid, and probably always will, but you just made my day." Logan squeezed me tighter and I pretended not to breath. He pulled away and I smiled.
"No, problem, Logan. No stop moping around, the others miss the Logan that's cooler than ice and greater than any singer or doctor alive." I exclaimed and Logan laughed, happier than he had in days.
"What's going on here?" Kendall asked walking over.
We both smiled at each other, and I sighed.
"Nothing, big brother. Just trying to help." I left and watched Logan and Kendall talk. Hoping that he would be happier now and that whatever was bothering him he had let out.
Kendall's pov
"What was that about?" I asked, sitting on the chair next to Logan's.
"I'm so sorry, Kendall." Logan said, looking at me with sad, guilty brown eyes.
"For what?" I asked, confused.
"Hey, let's go back to the apartment." James said, walking over.
"Sure." I turned back to Logan.
He sighed. "I'll tell you later."
I nodded and we both went inside.
We had dinner and talked about our day. Mom didn't waste time in asking about our grades and how the demo was coming up. Gustavo was going crazy with all the writing. Mom said she would visit him tomorrow with Katie, to try and help him relax.
When we went to bed, Logan was getting ready to get into bed before he turned to me.
"Kendall, has Gustavo ever told you that he wants to get rid of me?" He asked.
I stared at him, startled by the question. "Of course not. We would all quit if he did. Why?"
Logan sighed and sat in the bed. "I sometimes think that I'm not good at this stuff."
"What stuff?" I asked, going to sit in his bed.
"The singing and the dancing. Mr. X has more problems with me than anyone else. I'm always hitting you guys and..." He sighed. "I'm just so bad at this."
"Logan, we're learning together." I said, and forced him to look at me. "James is crazy with being famous, we have to bring him down to earth, Carlos sometimes has trouble singing, which I don't think is true, but Gustavo's always going on and on about how bad he is." Logan looked at me sadly, and tried to not look away, but every once in a while he would look down. "You know what's the thing about, Gustavo?" Logan looked at me, waiting for the answer. "He judges us when we're at our best."
Logan stared at me shocked. "What?"
"Yeah." I laughed, knowing I didn't believe it the first time I had figured it out. "Gustavo's hardest on you because you're already good."
"But I don't understand, I mess up." Logan argued, completely taken aback.
"Yes," I nodded to him. "That's the thing. Gustavo has no way of telling us were doing good, so he screams at us. You then try to work harder on being better and it comes out bad." Logan looked at me a bit confused. "Look, we've been in this business how long?"
"Almost a six months."
I nodded. "In those six months, you've done good, you're perfect in every way, and every one loves you. Even Mr. X thinks you're great, but who's the only one who says you're not?"
"Gustavo." Logan sighed.
"Yes, and he does it to all of us." I explained. "He's just a cranky old man that's overworked. You're the smart one Logan, you should know what happens when pressure and stress gets the best of us." I said.
"We scream and get irritable all the time." Logan summarized.
"Exactly." I ruffled his hair and he laughed, before slapping my hand away. "Once again, you're the smart one, but I figure everything out."
Logan looked at me sheepishly, before his eyes brimmed with tears and I hugged him.
"Don't cry." I whispered into his head.
"I'm so sorry, Kendall. I've been so stupid and I did all these bad things." He cried and I felt tears come to my eyes, too, but controlled myself. Logan needed me to be strong and that was what I would be. "I'm so stupid."
"You're only human, Logie. You can't blame yourself for what happened. It's all better now." I said, trying to make it better.
"I did know what was happening." Logan cried, tears of shame streaking down his cheeks like waterfalls.
I kissed his forehead and sighed, closing my own eyes.
"You were stressed and hurt. You were doing exactly what Gustavo was doing. overworking yourself to the point of stress. The only difference was that you didn't yell or hurt others, you were hurting yourself." I whispered my eyes once again filling up with tears, and my vision blurred. "I won't let that happen again, because I'm going to help you feel better. You're a great singer and you do everything better than anyone else I know." I paused trying to not let the fear and pain show in my voice. My mind was filled with Logan's body with cuts and I closed my eyes trying to escape that picture. "Now, I just need you to see that."
Logan hugged me tightly and sniffled a couple of times. "You're the greatest person I've ever met, Kendall." He pulled away. "I love you and the others, all of you guys."
"And we love you, too. We don't want you to do that. Believe me, none of them would want you to do this." I touched him lightly where I though the scars were and he tensed.
"I'm sorry." He whispered again and I hugged him. I knew that now was the time to really talk to him. He wouldn't run away now.
As we pulled away I felt a renewed hope spring in my heart. I let him lay in bed and watched him until he fell asleep, before I went to my bed. Determination to help Logan filled my heart and I knew that I would help him, even if it was the last thing I did.
Here's another chapter. This one made me a little sad, but happy, because Logan's listening now. :)