~*~o~*~
Marty accompanied Patrick to the cemetery to see his son's little grave. "It's beautiful," said Marty when she saw Brendan's stone.
"So tiny," Patrick said as he held Marty's hand. He was thinking about that tiny casket being lowered into the ground. His little boy was gone, and he'd never see him again.
"I can't believe he's gone. This can't be real," Patrick said as his voice broke.
"Patrick, I am so sorry," Marty said as she gently squeezed his hand.
Tears fell as Patrick crushed Marty into his arms. He needed her. He needed her warmth, tenderness, and her comfort. As he held her, he clung to her for dear life. He had to be strong for Blair because she was falling apart, but he needed a little comfort of his own right now.
"Patrick," Marty said as she melted in his embrace. His arms around her felt incredibly nice. He hadn't held her in so long, and she always loved when he held her close.
"Let's go somewhere. How about the meadow?" Patrick suggested.
"Alright," Marty responded as they headed toward the car. They were going to their favorite place on Llantano Mountain, the place they had said they would be married one day. She was sure they were going there so he could tell her that they were over.
The words she thought she would hear from him did not come. They walked in the meadow, holding hands. Tall sheltering trees surrounded them along with beautiful wildflowers. "It's so beautiful here. And you too are beautiful," Patrick said as he stopped in his tracks and gazed into Marty's sapphire eyes.
"Why did you bring me here, Patrick?" Marty asked. If he was going to tell her they were over, she wanted to hear it now. She didn't want to wait any longer.
"I need you, Margaret," Patrick stated. He pulled her against him as he locked his arms around her tight. "I want you..."
"Patrick, I... I don't know..." she said in a whisper as she tried to avoid his eyes.
As much as she wanted him, she knew he loved Blair. She knew he wanted her only for comfort sex. She hadn't been with anyone since the night she had been raped, and the thought of making love here in the meadow was more than a bit undaunting.
Patrick lowered his lips onto hers in a long, tender kiss. She shivered as the kiss changed to one of passion. Suddenly she couldn't stop herself. She wanted Patrick, even if it happened only one time. She'd face the reprecussions of their passion later as she was in need of comforting, too. Her feelings for Todd were so conflicting. She knew she'd never have him although a part of her heart would always be his. Whenever the hurt most blinded her, she had sought Patrick's embrace.
"I want you here... now..." Patrick said as he started to remove her clothing. Marty shivered as she had never made love outside before. The meadow was deserted; they wouldn't be seen. Even so, Marty felt cautious.
"Don't be afraid, Margaret. I'm going to make it beautiful for you," Patrick promised.
She didn't doubt that. She just had so many fears; one of which was that Patrick would desert her just as soon as they'd made love. "It's okay, Patrick. I am not afraid. I know you'd never hurt me," Marty spoke in a whisper.
*Not physically anyway,* she silently added.
"I absolutely adore you," he said as he kissed her soft skin which was revealed when her dress pooled at her feet.
*But you don't love me as you love Blair,* Marty spoke to him in her mind.
She didn't say the words though as he unclasped her bra, molding her beautiful breasts in his large hands. "Ohhh that feels so good," Marty said in a gasp. It had been so long since anyone had touched her this way; since she had allowed anyone to touch her. And here she was, allowing Patrick, even though in her heart she knew it was wrong. He loved Blair, but she was about to make love to him. As much as he needed her- she needed him, too.
Patrick smiled as he lifted her in his arms, laying her down upon a field of wildflowers. He spread kisses all down her body, then very slowly removed her panties. Marty stared at him, feeling vulnerable in her nakedness considering she had not been touched since the night of the rape.
"It's alright, Margaret," Patrick soothed. "I am going to make love to you. It's going to be amazing..."
Her eyes darkened with desire as Patrick stood to remove his clothing. As his body moved over hers, she was ready to become one with him. She was tired of living with the ugly memories of the rape and wanted to replace it with something good. She instinctively knew that Patrick could help her do that.
"I need you, Patrick," Marty murmured. "Please."
Patrick moved between her legs, positioning himself. In that moment, Marty felt a swift sense of panic. An image of Todd came to her as he forced himself inside her repeatedly, ripping into her body as he tore apart her heart.
"It's alright now..." Patrick said soothingly when he felt Marty tense. "There's only me and you here. Let that memory go..."
"Patrick!" she gasped, feeling his tip pressed against her entrance.
She was so wet and snug as he gently pushed himself inside her. He moved slowly as he didn't want to scare her. He knew it had been a very long time since a man had touched her. "Are you alright, Margaret?" he asked as he was now half-way buried inside.
She nodded, biting her lower lip as the passion overtook her. "Please... I want you inside me..." she murmured.
With a heavy thrust, Patrick entered her all the way. Marty cried out, lost in the sensation of becoming one with him. "Please Patrick... Ohhh please! Don't stop," she begged him.
Flexing his hips, Patrick moved in and out of Marty's receptive body, making sweet love to her. He brought her to climax with his thrusts, then he too found his fulfillment. He held her crushed under him as he struggled to catch his breath.
"That was beautiful," he said as he kissed her forehead.
"Thank you for making me realize how good it could be again."
"Margaret, I-."
"Please don't talk, Patrick. Not now. Please don't ruin the moment."
Gently Patrrick removed himself from her silken depths, still holding her close as he lay beside her. "How about I recite a poem then?" he asked her. "Something that seems appropriate for what we just shared."
"Alright," Marty said as she held him close.
"I whispered, I am too young, And then, I am old enough; Wherefore I threw a penny To find out if I might love. Go and love, go and love, young man, If the lady be young and fair.' Ah, penny, brown penny, brown penny, I am looped in; the loops of her hair. O love is the crooked thing, There is nobody wise enough To find out all that is in it, For he would be thinking of love Till the stars had run away And the shadows eaten the moon," he spoke. (poem by William Butler Yeats)
"That must be your favorite poem," she said as a smile came to her lips.
"It is," he stated. "What we just shared, Margaret, it means the world to me... and I will never forget it."
"I'll never forget it either," she responded.
Tenderly he kissed her sweet lips and caressed her cheek. "I should get you home now," he told her.
*Yes, so you can go see Blair,* she said to him sadly in her mind.
"Are you alright, angel?" he asked her as he watched her getting dressed. She looked saddened, but she refused to say a word.
She glanced at him sharply, hearing him call her 'angel.' Lately, she hadn't heard that endearment falling from his lips when he spoke to her. She wasn't his angel anymore. He had a real angel in heaven now- Brendan, and Blair was his one true love.
"Take me home, Patrick," she said as she was now fully dressed.
Patrick tugged his shirt over his head and zipped up his jeans. "Let's go," he said as he took Marty's hand.
~*~o~*~
He dropped her off at her place as she said good-bye. Although they hadn't say a word, they both knew in their hearts that what they had once shared had ended. Something vital was missing, and their hearts were leading them in different directions. Feeling sad and blue, Marty entered the house and sunk down on the love seat to cry. As her tears rushed from her eyes, she suddenly thought of Todd. When she thought of the argument they'd had, more tears fell. As she wrapped her arms around herself in a tight hug, she felt very alone.
Patrick ended up at the stables as he went to care for his and Blair's horses. Both Magic and Ember were glad to see him as they welcomed him with enthusiastic neighing. Gently Patrick stroked the ebony mane of his stallion. "Magic, I am in love with Blair," he confided. "But today I made sweet love to Marty."
"I need Blair to get well and leave the hospital fast because I am madly in love with her, and we must be together. I just wish I didn't have to break Marty's heart. She doesn't deserve the hurt I am causing her," Patrick went on to say. "I pray that Blair never discovers what I shared with Marty, because if she does, there will be hell to pay."