CHAPTER 2
"I'm sorry John" Sherlock's voice echos in my head. It's not real. Not real. He is dead.
That's when I see his face in front of mine, those eyes, filled with tears again.
"Not real, not real, not real" I murmur, shutting my eyes tight and clasp my hand round the gun again for better grip as my hand starts to shake uncontrollably. My heart is pounding in my chest, so much that I can't breathe again.
Sherlock's hand brushes my cheek and it feels so real, so true, I look up as his blue eyes pour into my soul.
"Put the gun down John" He says and pushes the gun away from my head.
Tears flood my eyes and Sherlock places one hand on either side of my face and whispers into my ear.
"I love you too, John Watson" He pulls his lips away and stares at me for a minute. I can't believe it, but why? Why would he do that? Why would he not tell me? I push myself from his grasp, his face drops instantly.
"Why? Why didn't you tell me? A YEAR SHERLOCK!" I'm shouting at him now "A GOD DAMN YEAR!"
Sherlock stares at me in confusion, his eyes flickering in the light, as he backs away from me. He looks scared for the first time ever but I don't care. I continue to shout at him.
"I… I… John… I'm… I'm sorry… I had to…" What? He had to? My body tenses up at the words and at that moment Mrs Hudson bursts through the door and stares in shock at Sherlock, and I still continue to shout at him.
"YOU HAD TO? HAD TO! Liar. I can't even look at you" Sherlock takes a swipe at my arm to stop me but I move it out the way before he can touch me. I storm out of the room, I don't limp for some weird reason but that is not what I should be thinking about at this moment.
When I arrive back home, I slam the door behind me and fall to my knees, holding my head in my hands while tears fall through the gaps between my fingers, Sherlock is alive. Alive. I should be happy. But how could he not tell me? What was going through his head that day? Did I not mean anything to him? Do I not mean anything to him?