Nagging Truths
Of course it was for the best!
Or at least—they tried to reassure themselves that it was… when he came to practice looking tired, tired of everything, tired of them and Dranzer responded in a steadily widening series of circles until it was riding the lip of the beydish and then toppled limply onto the ground… and Kai seemed not to care… but then picked it up and turned around and walked away, ignoring them calling him back…
When Kai seemed lost in puzzling thoughts, and they knew he was reviewing his losses, identifying the exact moments that had turned it around, turned it against him, the exact moments fate had turned against him… They knew, when he finally blinked, that he had decided to blame himself. That he'd identified the exact moments he had turned it against himself—the exact mistakes he had made to turn fate against—
Certainly it was best this way… God knew what he would be like if he'd won, all those times. God knew what would happen to Kai if he won—God knew he'd have no reason to show up to practice at all. God knew he'd have no reason… to live…