November 20th, 2014.

Every day was like the last. An endless cycle of drinking to get to sleep and drinking to numb the crippling pain inside him. It was getting worse. Each day he waited it seemed that that "yes" seemed more and more compelling.

Sam had had enough. Dean, Bobby, Cas...he was the least of any of them, he knew that. It had just taken a painfully long time to come to terms with it. At long last, Sam was finally being cornered by the one thing that he swore he'd never do; but he had run out of options.

He sat up from the sofa and pulled his battered laptop towards him as he switched it on. It was the first time he'd been on it in a while, and it looked almost as broken and tired as Sam felt. He opened up the internet and started browsing to find weather omens for any signs of Lucifer anywhere. Ohio had been experiencing bad storms – that was a possible signpost. There's been a huge lightning strike in Chicago...again, it was a possibility.

Sam scrolled down to see if there had been any other unexpected weather conditions in any major areas, and paused when he saw one.

Detroit, Michigan – temperature drop by 10 degrees for the past few days.

Sam let a slight hint of interest creep onto his face as this final report caught his eye. Detroit. That place...that city. Something felt like it was pulling him to that result, despite the other, more convincing weather disruptions in the other places. Right now, Sam was in Memphis, Tennessee...it wouldn't take too long to get there. He remembered the days when he and Dean used to travel a lot further for a lot less. Sam closed his laptop and had one last think about what he was intending to do when he got there. He had learnt the hard way, and lost everyone who had ever been important to him in one way or another. His family had abandoned him – or had he abandoned his family? He didn't know anymore.

After a deep breath, a quick glimpse in the mirror and throwing all of his belongings into two duffel bags, Sam left the run down house and grabbed a deserted car to borrow for the last trip of his life.

By the time Sam was an hour or two into the journey, he was craving another sip of whatever strong alcohol was available. Whenever he felt like this, he couldn't help but draw ironic parallels to his addiction to demon blood several years ago. All he saw in himself when this feeling took hold of him was weakness. Weakness. The word echoed in his mind as he tried to think of something else. He looked out onto the road ahead of him and saw the world that he had helped destroy. He could see a building in flames in the far distance and passed several other stolen cars parked at the side of the road. The only good thing was that because the roads were so empty, Sam could make it to Detroit in around 9 hours, he reckoned.

Somehow that wasn't any consolation for what he'd done. He sighed and blinked back tears as he continued to drive. The time for tears was over. It was about time he took responsibility and did the only thing that he could at this point. Sam turned on the radio and "Nights in White Satin" came playing reluctantly through the speakers. He smiled in spite of himself for the first time in weeks. He tapped his hand against the steering wheel in time to the music and was reminded of the countless hours that he and Dean had spent on the road together. How things had changed so dramatically in such a short space of time.

By the time it hit midnight, he was an hour away from Detroit. Sam felt himself getting an unpleasant mix of fear and guilt rising in his gut. He was scared. Really scared. He had lived a lot of his life being afraid, but he didn't know if he'd ever felt anything as unique and overwhelming as this kind of fear. And Dean wasn't there with him. Dean wasn't there to tell him that it was okay. It was okay to be scared. It was okay not to be invincible.

It was okay to give up. And say yes to the Devil.

Sam let one tear escape before trying to keep his emotions under wraps. Fear was not the Winchester way; he'd been raised better than that.

"There's the road, and there's the story where the road goes. And then more road, the roar of the freeway, the roar of the city sheening across the city."