DISCLAIMER: ATLUS owns Persona 3 Portable. The song is Why by Secondhand Serenade.
A/N: DATES ARE CHANGED FOR THE PURPOSE OF THIS FIC.
FINALLY! Truthfully this should have been posted since Sunday but that log in error just keeps messing my update schedule.
This was heavily inspired by "The February Hospital" fanfic of cardboard boxes.
To my reviewers: You don't know how much you made my week! I'm so happy I looked like a lunatic grinning in front of the monitor.
namine23: Well, I have this sadistic pleasure of making Aki jealous which I really can't put into words so expect more of his jealousy. I'm glad you've noticed my effort of making FeMC standout as a public property. And there's no other name I could think of that would go better with the classmate but Kaito, the Vocaloid. Thanks for your review!
Yosho25: I'm glad that this fic of mine has caught your interest and that you liked it. Thanks for your review, it means a lot.
Mimi Minato: I'm so happy you found that part exciting, like something that shouldn't happen there right. Thanks for your review.
Oblivious-Dimension24: You should totally be curious on what part Shinjiro would play in this story because it's not only in this chapter that he would show up. And thank you for uplifting my spirit, your review meant a lot to me.
A/N: Forgive me if the tenses aren't smooth. There's a part where Shinjiro is remembering the events of 'yesterday' and I had a hard time writing it in a way that is different from the previous chapter.
And I've broken all my promises to you
Harder to Breathe
Because these days aren't easy like they've happened once before
These days aren't easy anymore
Why do you do this to me?
Why do you do this so easily?
You make it hard to smile
Because you make it hard to breathe
February 3, 2010 / Wednesday / Late Afternoon
Tatsumi Memorial Hospital
They said he woke up three days ago but the truth is he couldn't really remember anything about that day. However, obscurely he could make out some shapes and figures and sounds. He thinks he saw Aki, Mitsuru, and another guy in white (probably the doctor) hovering around him mumbling about things that his ears couldn't perceive yet. And there was that hazy image of red tearful eyes, the color of something not quite brown but not auburn either, accompanied with the sound of sobbing. This he thinks is a part of his delusions, a result of the drugs those doctors had injected on him. He dreams while he is half-awake.
His first memories of waking up though were a line of student representatives giving him congratulatory and get-well-soon gifts. By gifts being flowers and fruits. Their visits wouldn't even last a minute, thankfully. Judging by his fierce countenance and gruff voice the representatives were well aware their presence weren't very much welcome or needed at all. But there was this one that just couldn't get the hint. And Shinjiro is so sure that she isn't dumb but just really stubborn.
Said stubborn person arrived yesterday with a bouquet of daisies and a basket of apples. Just like any other representatives she introduced herself in the same fashion.
"Good afternoon, senpai. I'm here to congratulate you on your recovery and wish you to get well soon as a representative from Class 2-F."
She bowed dramatically lower than she should have, and when she raised back her head she beamed a very bright cheerful smile at him, which gave him the impression that if she were the sun he would probably be blinded.
After introducing themselves and putting the gifts by the table the other representatives would leave with a dismissing silence or sometimes an intimidating glare by Shinjiro. But this one, this one, was different. After she placed the basket of apples by the bedside table near him and finished putting the daisies in the vase with newly changed water and throwing the yellow bells at the trash bin, Shinjiro noted, that the girl even had the knack to tell him her name.
"I'm Minako Arisato."
Shinjiro only looked at the dangling red earphones around her neck.
She smiled again, it wasn't the sunny kind as before, this time it was a heartwarming one. Back then Shinji wondered how he knew the names of the kinds of smile the girl makes. He found that he didn't have an answer.
Shinjiro learned she was unwilling to go as she stood there firmly, waiting for a response from him. But he wasn't one to associate with people, even with a person who he thinks seemed to be familiar. So he merely grunted and closed his eyes, hoping that she would get offended and leave. But he was proved wrong. She didn't leave; instead she took the chair beside his bed and sat herself comfortably there, then started talking amiably as if he didn't ignore her.
"I see. You're probably still too drained, senpai. I'm sure if you eat well and take all your medicines you'll be in good shape in no time. Ah! Would you like me to peel and slice an apple for you, senpai? Or would you like to drink some juice or water instead? Ne, senpai, you look parched."
He didn't dare open his eyes the whole time but from the shuffling sounds he heard Minako Arisato started peeling an apple from the basket she brought.
"You know, the other representatives said you were truly scary. They said they went out of your room hastily in fear that your eyes might shoot laser beams on them. Haha! Seriously senpai, you shouldn't be so stingy. You'd look old faster with wrinkles and frown lines covering your face. It'd be a shame since your quite handsome..."
He had to open his eyes on that. No one has ever said anything like that to him. He had been called punk, thug, delinquent, low-life, bastard, and all kinds of demeaning names but that was just...
Shinjiro was speechless. What kind of brain does she have?
When the girl named Minako Arisato noticed he finally opened his eyes she lifted a hand towards his lips and offered him a crescent shaped slice of apple. He didn't move nor speak, he just furrowed his brows. When she realized he wasn't going to take it she retreated her hand back and sighed. She pouted and tilted her head to one side.
"You really don't want an apple, senpai? Oh well, I'll just eat them myself then since it'd be a waste. I know! I'll bring oranges tomorrow; they're softer and would be easier to eat for senpai. Oh my, seems I have to go now. I can't stay long for today because I have lots of homework to do. But I'll come back tomorrow, promise."
"Whatever..." was the first reply he had given her, and she smiled happily at him for that.
Minako Arisato promised to return. And that day was today. Shinjiro wishes she just shouldn't bother or more like for her to stop bothering him. Unfortunately he wasn't heard by any patron for she came. She seriously came back.
Just as she had promised she's brought oranges (in a plastic bag) accompanied with a bundle of red tulips. She prepares them routinely the way she did yesterday. The daisies are now replaced and the oranges are sitting on the basket along with the apples. She then takes her place beside his bed.
Minako Arisato smiles at him earnestly like yesterday, but it was chipped. Somehow she looks somber.
"Hi, senpai. How are you? I hope you're getting better every day. I told you I'd bring some oranges."
The tone of her voice lacks the usual level of mirth either. Shinjiro looks at her eyes, trying to see what is going on with the girl in front of him. Yesterday she was too hyperactive that he thought he was going to get a headache just by listening to her talk. Now she looks as if the weight of the world landed on her shoulders and she just wants to cry. Or was she bipolar?
Minako Arisato peels an orange silently. A certain feeling worms its way to his chest and before he could stop himself Shinjiro asks,
"Something wrong?"
It surprises her, a shock then confused expression passes across her face until it turns into a smiling one.
"No, there's nothing wrong senpai. It's just..." She trails off. A smirk blooms in her face.
"You needn't worry senpai, I was just having a hard time deciding on what to write in my career assessment form. I'm already sure that I want to take the arts classes, but what art I'm not sure yet." Having finished her piece she laughs it off.
"I didn't say I was worried." He corrects her roughly.
"If you say so." She has the nerve to giggle.
Shinjiro knows that he shouldn't have said anything, that he would regret it later on. It irritates him that he couldn't stop himself from being concerned, when he isn't the type to be one. He's not like Aki, not in the slightest.
"Senpai, when you're released from the hospital come eat sweets with me okay?"
"What?"
There had been girls that had tried to ask him on a date before, some direct and some subtly, but he didn't expect it to come out from this girl especially when she knows his reputation. Truthfully after the girls had found out how rude he was they consequently avoid him. If there were brave souls who liked to think that they could tame the scary Shinjiro they also dwindle in numbers.
This Minako Arisato probably doesn't know who she's dealing with.
"Are you asking me out?"
"Hmm? Oh! Don't misunderstand senpai, of course not. I wouldn't want you to tell me off, I've heard rumors well enough. Haha! I mean if I can make you eat sweets then it might improve your mood and you won't be so grumpy like you are now. Then I would have made the world a great deal."
"And who says eating sweets can lighten one's mood?" He asks gruffly, realizing that the girl isn't taking him seriously.
"Well, whenever I feel down I eat sweets, after that I kind of feel like happier."
"Maybe not happy but more like hyper..." Shinjiro muttered.
"Here, senpai. Say aah."
Minako Arisato offers him a piece of orange in her delicate white fingers. Shinjiro glares at it.
"Water..." He mumbles.
"Oh, okay."
She takes the pitcher on top of the table beside the basket of fruits and pours water on the glass. She hands it to him carefully. Shinjiro tries to move his arm to take it but it seems that he doesn't have enough strength to raise an arm, something late to realize and he curses himself for it.
Minako Arisato smiles and gently holds the glass of water against his lips, her other hand cups his chin to assist him. Shinjiro doesn't try to resist but merely concedes begrudgingly. This is somehow better than eating that orange from her hand though.
After composing both of themselves Minako Arisato reverted back to her usual chatter.
"Senpai, don't you like sweets?" She gives him a stare that looked so serious someone would think she posed him a political question.
"It's not that I don't like them or hate them. I'm just not fond of it."
"Oh...so you'd still eat them. I'm glad! Then we really can go to the sweets shop together." She's obviously too happy that she even claps her hands.
He doesn't confirm it nor does he reject it either.
The sides of his lips twitch and curl up.
Minako Arisato has a rather infectious smile.
It's a dream. Definitely a dream.
The figure of a girl with russet hair and red eyes runs happily around him, her laughter like a melody in the vast garden of various flowers. Violet, yellow, pink, red, orange, in so many different shades.
He can't make out the face of the girl. But he feels like he knows her. She's so familiar yet...
He feels like there is some kind of emotion that is entirely attached to her. He can't put his finger on it though.
The girl then rushes forward to him, hugging him tight, and she cries, cries, cries, cries, and cries.
"Shinji…."
And then there's nothing more but the echo of her cries and a trace of the droplets of her tears.
February 4, 2010 / Thursday / Late Afternoon
Tatsumi Memorial Hospital
Its sunflowers and rice porridge this time, and Minako Arisato boasts that she cooked it herself. Shinjiro decides it's kind of new, and nice, and an uplifting gesture. But it doesn't mean he approves of it. Shinjiro knows things like this disappear, and he doesn't want to be the one left with the after taste.
Minako Arisato happily unpacks the porridge and puts it on top of his eating table. After which she places both her hands on her lap daintily as a lady should while flashing him an expectant smile. She waits for him to take it.
Seconds tick by she finally realizes he's not going to do anything about it. She pouts and tilts her head to one side. Sadness glimmers through her eyes.
"Senpai, aren't you even going to taste the rice porridge I especially made for you. If you don't notice it makes me feel kind of bad. I promise it's really delicious, just try!"
Of course he's noticed. She's even whining now, so how could he not. Shinjiro sighs, feeling resigned.
"Fine."
A sound resembling 'hah' escapes out of her lips, her eyes widening, she inclines herself forward. Too eager to see him eat what she brought for him.
However, he fails to do so because he hasn't had the energy to do it yet. He's been just fed through IVs. The doctors even told him that he'd gain control over his arms only until a few more weeks after. So he can't exactly indulge her.
She must have noticed the effort he is pushing himself to through the deepened scowl that spread on his face. She gasps in realization.
"Oh my! I'm so sorry senpai. I forgot. Please. I really forgot. Sorry."
She truly is sorry. It even looks like she is about to cry. But Shinjiro would have none of that.
"I get it already! It's fine. Geez, just help me instead of babbling on like that."
Minako Arisato bites her bottom lip and nods.
In the silence of his white pristine room in the hospital, Shinjiro Aragaki is being spoon fed by a girl. Something that has never happened before and will never happen again, Shinjiro decides. He purposely avoids her eyes and fights the color that stubbornly creeps up to his cheeks.
When he finishes the bowl she speaks softly.
"Thank you."
He raises a brow at her.
"For what?"
"For eating the porridge I cooked for you and…for letting me be close to you. I'm really happy, Shinjiro-senpai."
"Tch" He looks away.
"It ain't bad." He mumbles.
"Huh?"
"I mean the porridge. I said it ain't bad."
"I'm glad you liked it then."
He isn't looking but he knows she's probably smiling. Like a kid who just received a piece of candy.
Shinjiro wonders about the tightening feeling within his chest, the oxygen getting trapped in his lungs.
February 5, 2010 / Friday / Late Afternoon
Tatsumi Memorial Hospital
Shinjiro stirs with the feeling of a warm soft hand gently brushing the hair on his forehead. His eyes flutter partly open. And he sees her hovering above him, smiling and a solemn expression gracing her face. He wills himself to wake and shake the remnants of his slumber. But she stops him.
"Shhh…its okay senpai. Just sleep. You're tired."
The hand caresses his cheek. Shinjiro complies.
"Let me touch you like this just for a while…"
Shinjiro falls asleep with his hand cradled dearly by Minako Arisato.
February 6, 2010 / Saturday / Evening
Tatsumi Memorial Hospital
Shinjiro listlessly drills his eyes at the card tucked in the basket she brought. He's sure she had written it yesterday on her visit while he was asleep since he doesn't remember seeing it there before. Her girly script carefully scribbled across the pink paper.
Take care. Ganbatte! I'll come back tomorrow. PROMISE! – Minako
Shinjiro thinks it's idiotic. Who puts take care and ganbatte in a single message? Apparently she does. That doesn't matter though.
After all she didn't come.
Shinjiro knows he should never have counted on it in the first place. He knows. But he can't help it.
It's stupid.
I should have known this wasn't real
And fought it off, fought to feel what matters most
Everything that you feel
Author's Notes: I confess. It should have ended at Feb 5 with that sweet ending but something overcame me and I just had to be evil and turn it into something bitter hurting Shinjiro like that. I feel like I hate myself too for it but I don't want to change it either, especially because Akihiko is the reason why FeMC never came. Now THAT'S a teaser for you all. You know the drill. REVIEW if you want to know what happens next.
Ganbatte = Do your best or Good luck.