Disclaimer: I do not own Sons of Anarchy, it's owned my the amazing Kurt Sutter, FX and everyone else who has the money to kick my ass in court if I don't have this up here. I do however own Taru, her horse and just about every other random that pops up in the story. This has come from the depths of my sick, insane, twisted, depraved mind and my madness fuel's it to keep going as do all my lovely fans that keep reading and reviewing.

michan92: I know how using google translate can be, I use it all the time too. Tara is with Jax in this fic, my OC Taru is with Chibs. I hope that helped clear it up.

DragonBby: Hello! Welcome back! I'm sorry but I had to do it, but I will tell you this now, she will get her revenge on Koivu in the next story because shit is going to go down while the boys are inside. XP. They'll be there, there are big secrets being kept between Angel and Taru but it will come out... later... but it does show just how close they both are. Things are going to be in Chibs' perspective for a few more chapters except chap 7, chap 7 will be scary. I know, when I was writing that piece I was watching the episode too, I could just see his face going from some stuck up smirk then dropping and the thoughts going through his mind of 'someones going to die for not doing their job properly'.

Rhirhi: Thank you! I know what you mean, I want to wipe the smirk of Jimmy's face too. Not long to wait now, exciting things will happen.

Red Flag – Billy Talent

Cast off the crutch that kills the pain
The Red Flag waving never meant the same
The kids of tomorrow don't need today
When they live in the sins of yesterday

The Alcoholic Haze

=Chibs' P.O.V=

I stumbled drunkenly towards the bathroom, my vision blurry from the amount of alcohol I'd been consuming over the past two or three hours. I placed the bottle of whiskey on the counter and leant against it before yanking my hoodie roughly over my head and dumping it on the tiles angrily; I bit back the bile rising in my throat and yanked my shirt over my head before leaning heavily against the sink taking another long drink from the bottle.

I exhaled slowly and staggered slightly turning back around and leaning back against the edge of the counter attempting to unbuckle my belt. I felt disgusted, self loathing and angry at myself for everything that had happened because of me, because of what I'd done.

I finally managed to unbuckle my belt and kick my jeans off leaving them in a pile on the floor with my boxers. I turned clutching the side of the sink and pressed play on the beat up radio sitting on the shelf next to the door beside the mirror.

I waited for a few seconds waiting for which ever CD was in the player to pick up and leant heavily on my palms on the edge of the sink before looking into the mirror. It's all my fault love; I should have never done it. I sighed heavily and clutched at the edge of the sink listening as the music began to flow through the room, the lyrics of 'One of those nights' by Lonestar filtered through the speakers into the room.

Have you ever had one of those days
When you wake up feeling good
So good that you can take the whole world on
Or one of those days when you just know no matter what
Nothing in the world could go wrong

Well, that's the way I feel this morning
But, baby, I just gotta say
I always have one of those days

I pulled open the door and let it swing shut behind me with a soft thud. The first icy spray was a much needed shock to my system as I turned the dial up high and stood in the spray waiting for it to warm up properly until it was a hot enough to redden my skin but not enough to cause too much damage.

After one of those nights, just like last night
Oh, my, what a beautiful thing, just you and me
Those tangled sheets were wrapped around us
Baby, thanks to your love it was one of those nights
That leads to one of those days
That leads right to one of those nights

I rested my forearms on the wall and leant on them resting my forehead on them lightly. What have I done to you Taru? You're lying in a hospital bed and it's my fucking fault. I sighed heavily arching my back slightly stretching the muscles and clicking my spine back into place. I should have never gone to those god damn feds Taru, they could do jack shit to protect you from Jimmy. My eyes stung as a tear slipped down my cheek. I don't know how he found out but he did love, he only did this so he could keep me under his thumb, let him know he still dictates my life to me. I let my shoulders slump and turned pressing my back to the freezing tiles before slowly sliding down the wall to settle on the ground.

Have you ever had one of those smiles
You just can't wipe away the sweet anticipation's too strong
One of those smiles you wear all day
Cause you can taste the kiss of passion waiting back home

Well, that's the one I'm wearing right now
But, baby, you always leave one of those smiles on me

I put my head in my hands and let the tears fall freely. I missed having Taru to chase away the nightmares, I missed seeing her Charger pull up with tyre's squealing, I missed having her cuddled up next to me on the couch while we watched TV or some god forsaken movie she'd watched a thousand times before, I missed cruising on my Harley with her arms wrapped around my, body pressed against mine.

After one of those nights, just like last night
Oh, my, what a beautiful thing, just you and me
Those tangled sheets were wrapped around us
Baby, thanks to your love
It was one of those nights that leads to one of those days
That leads right to one of those nights

I sighed softly and dropped my hands from my face before looking up and letting the water spray run over my skin. I'm so sorry Taru; you should have never got caught up in my bullshit. You should have never had to pay the price for my stupid fucking mistakes. I scrubbed my palms over my eyes and exhaled deeply settling my eyes on the ceiling before slumping against the wall.

Oh, one of those nights, just like last night
Oh, my, what a beautiful thing, just you and me
Those tangled sheets were wrapped around us
Baby, thanks to your love it was one of those nights
One of those nights, just like last night
Oh, my, what a beautiful thing, just you and me
Those tangled sheets were wrapped around us
Baby, thanks to your love
It was one of those nights that leads to one of those days
That leads right to one of those nights
One of those nights
Oh, one of those nights, just like last night
Oh my what a beautiful thing, just you and me
Those tangled sheets were wrapped around us
Baby, thanks to your love
It was one of those nights, just like last night
Oh, my, what a beautiful thing, just you and me
Those tangled sheets were wrapped around us
Baby, thanks to your love it was one of those nights

I listened to the song as it finished and choked back a sigh before scrubbing my palms over my face again. I hope you can forgive me Taru, I hope you're ok after everything that's happened. I slowly raised myself to my feet and turned off the shower whisking water away from my face as I stepped out and grabbed a towel off the rail.

I settled on the edge of the bed, towel secured around my waist, wet hair dripping down my back. I glanced around the room taking it in slowly. Jesus fucking Christ, I might as well bloody live here. I shook my head lightly seeing several shirts of mine strewn across the floor, a couple of pairs of boxers, a pair of bloody, dirty jeans and my kutte hanging up outside the wardrobe. She's going to kill me when she gets home and sees this mess. I stood slowly snatching my things off the floor and dumped them in a pile on the bed before fishing around for a clean set of clothing.

I glanced towards the door at the sound of a whine and found Buster sitting there staring back at me. "I know Buster, the 'ouse is a god damn pig sty and Taru will 'ave my bloody 'ead when she sees it like this" I stated grabbing the bundle of clothing and heading towards the laundry.

I kicked the door open and dumped everything on the bench on the opposite side of the room before sifting through it all sorting out the colours, whites and dark clothing. I stalled with a shirt in hand and shook my head lightly. She's been rubbing off on me. There was a point in time where I would have just shoved everything in at the same time and be damned if it came out a different colour than when it went in but now, now it was mostly Taru washing my clothing, sorting it, folding it, ironing it if she could really be damned to, hell even washing some things by hand because of how stained they were.

I sighed softly letting my shoulders slump as I dumped the first lot of washing in and hit start. Buster whined nudging his bowl across the floor to me and sat down in front of me tail gliding across the floor as he waited patiently for me to get his dinner. "Alright Buster, I get it, ya hungry" I murmured grabbing the dish before turning to find his bag of dog food and fill his dish.

Trying to go and get the next one out tomorrow! Enjoy my lovelies, reviews are appreciated very much. I do actually have a fanmix dedicated to Taru and Chibs, if you want to see what songs are on it just tell me and I'll post it to my LiveJournal (Which I have been neglecting :'( must update it with all my other chapters)