A/N- Hello again everyone! Thanks for the great response to my first chapter! Thank you to all my reviwers. --Gives reviewers virutal cookies.-- I can't believe I got 222 hits and 8 reviews! If you review, you too can get a virtual cookie! Lol, sorry I know lame... Anyway please review! I really want some feedback, even if you hate it, I want to know why! If you just say one word, I'll still be thrilled! Well, I'd like to say sorry this is still kind of short. I had a tough time starting this chapter, I kept changing the first few paragraphs and I think I finally got it right...well I hope... I really hope I did well with this chapter and I hope ya aren't disapointed! Thank you so much for reading!

Summary: Derek's estranged mother, is diagnosed with a rare, terminal disease and the doctors are giving her two weeks to live. With this Derek must deal with old emotions surfacing as well as old memories he'd like to forget. But, you know what they say, with all pain, there comes love. Dasey!

Disclaimer: I do not own Life With Derek

Life With Derek: Depths of our Beings

Chapter Two:

Silent Pain

They say everyone has a moment in time in which, they wish they could just do-over and a just one person in their lives they could replace. I'm not one to be religious, but isn't everything supposed to happen for a reason? They say everyone must suffer at one point in time and must experience some type of emotional down fall…it makes us human. And, without pain there would be no happiness. So, if this is indeed true you must suffer to know what happiness is, so you can feel the difference and thrive. After you've gone through so much, you find this place in yourself, that isn't really you, but is you with out walls or barriers…and to be there is scary, really scary.

Some pain lingers, it's a deep emerged sadness, an ache that we don't feel every hour of every day, but yet will never be able to let go of. We may say that we've moved on, that we're "okay", but deep down in the depths of our hearts and souls we've not forgotten. We hush the pain, like a small child crying its lungs out and it have might seemed to work for a while, but in actuality it's just making it much worse.

I probably cried for about a half an hour longer in my father's arms. I tried to stop, but the tears just kept flowing. No one, by any means could call me 'emotional', but sometimes you have to cry to move on. I finally broke away, when Nora found my dad and me in an awkward pile on the floor. She didn't ask any questions, but her face said it all. It was only a matter of time until she found out…my dad and I can't keep playing our little game forever. There are only six people, who know the truth, who know who I truly am. Them being my dad, my mom, their lawyers, a judge, and I.

My dad told me I didn't have to go to school and that we could just tell Nora I'm sick, but I refused. I know, another shocker Derek Venturi wanting to go to the one place I've tried to get out going to everyday for years. The truth is school is the one place I flourish in. There I'm the big man on campus, the big hockey star, the ladies man. Yeah, it's a pretty good life; too bad it's just a little charade.

I reached my locker around 11:35, right before my 4th hour class was to start, and it just happened to be study hall.

"Hey, man where were you this morning? You already missed lunch." I turned to see my best friend Sam standing next to me.

"My dad was lecturing me for hours…he just kept ranting…" I said trying to sound annoyed.

"Oh, that's weird usually your dad has to force you out the door in the morning and he made you late…weird."

"Yeah, well you know sometimes parents are weird…"

"Yeah…"

Later that day, I had a lot of trouble concentrating, I mean more than usual. My teachers kept telling me to focus and shit, but I don't even think I was fully hearing them. Even Casey knew something was wrong, I was being "denser that usual", as she later put it.

Later that night I was sitting on my bed trying to read something for English, even though I can't even remember what it was about, when Casey approached me. She opened the door slowly and stared at me for a while before she spoke.

"Derek?"

"Yeah…" I replied uncomfortable with the situation.

"Umm, are you okay?"

I stared at her worried face "Yeah, I'm fine…"

Her face hardened a little "No, you're not…"

"Yeah…I am…" I responded a little weirded out by her response to my behavior.

"Derek, could you just drop the act with me for like five minutes and have this conversation with me!" She practically screamed at me.

"What conversation? Case, I know you're a goody-goody and all, but some problems you can't help someone with!"

"Oh yeah Derek, try me!"

"I don't have a fucking problem!"

"You just said you did!"

I looked up at her and stared "No, I didn't…" I barely muttered.

"Yeah, you did…" she said lowering her voice to a whisper.

"Look Case, I'm flattered you want to help me, but I don't need help…"

"Derek…I think you do…"

"It's nothing really…my mom's just in the hospital, dying…" I rolled my eyes at the thought.

"What? How is that nothing…?" she asked shocked.

"Let's just say, I'm not exactly fond of her…"

Casey looked pissed "Derek! She's your mother! What reason would you have not to be "fond" of her? What did she do, not let you have your way all the time? Derek, you're such a conceited jerk! Your own mother is dying and you're not even going to see her! Derek, this is your all time low!"

"YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ME CASEY!" I shouted and by the end started weeping again.

She closed the door, sat on the bed, and rubbed my back until I calmed down.

Her eyes started to dart around the room, avoiding mine, "Why do hate her so much Derek?"

I looked at her with big eyes, not knowing what to say, "Let's just say, most of my scars aren't from hockey…"

Casey looked at me confused "Wh…"

I stood up and took off my shirt.

She looked at me and stared tears framing her eyes and tempting to come out, "Oh my god, Derek…I…I didn't know…"

She stared at my chest again, trying to get over the huge butcher knife scars, the welts, and other horrifying marks.

I put my shirt back on and sat back down on the bed and wiped a tear from her eye "It's okay Case, how could you have…?"

She hugged me and we just sat there for what seemed like forever, or I wished… "Derek?"

"Yeah?"

"Is that the only thing she did to you?"

I looked her straight in her eyes and started balling again "No, Case…"

"Oh my god!" she whispered in disbelief, "She didn't…"

I nodded

She started crying harder and her voice was almost muffled, "She molested you too, didn't she Derek…?"

"Yeah, Case…she did…"

We both sat there holding on to each other for dear life, howling our eyes out.

I couldn't believe that I was crying in front of Casey, in front of someone I couldn't stand. Well, I could stand her; I actually rather enjoyed fighting with her. Maybe it was more than fighting; maybe I just enjoyed her company… Nevertheless, I couldn't believe I had just told Casey MacDonald, the Casey MacDonald, the grade-grubber klutz, my deepest, most personal secret. Hell, Edwin didn't even know…he was too young when it happened…and my dad and I agreed that it would be better if he didn't know. Sam didn't know either, and he'd been my best friend during that stage of my life. I don't know why I stopped playing my game and holding up my wall. I never broke down and told anyone before, until…Casey…

A/N- Well, there you are folks, I hope you enjoyed it! Once again I'm sorry for any spelling and/or grammar errors and I'm sorry if it sucked! Please review, it would mean a lot to me!

-chickenboyssuck