A/N: I'm sorry it took me so long to update! I just started school on Wednesday, so I didn't have a lot of free time! Please, fogive me, lol REVIEW! Lol, sorry I know you're probably all scrolling through this author's note...please stop and read this! Please review, if I don't get enough feedback, I can't keep writing this, I know that sounds stupid, but I want to make this fic for you, the reader, but without your opinions how am I to do that? It's simple reviews equal more chapters sooner. No reviews equal less chapters, less frequently or eventually putting this on hiatus. Please review, a minitue of your time, would make my day! Also, I really did not like this chapter when I wrote it. I wanted to make it realistic, but I don't think I did. I hope you think the I did well, lol. I'm trying, so work with me. I really hope you enjoy this chapter!

Summary: Derek's estranged mother, is diagnosed with a rare, terminal disease and the doctors are giving her two weeks to live. With this Derek must deal with old emotions surfacing as well as old memories he'd like to forget. But, you know what they say, with all pain, there comes love. Dasey!

Disclaimer: I do not own Life With Derek.

Life With Derek: Depths of our Beings

Chapter Three:

The Unforgotten

Some say everyone has a breaking point. A point in which they just can't take it anymore. With my experiences with angst and drama, I thought I was immune to such, but I think I was wrong, dead wrong. I mean, eventually everything catches up with you. You can only smile and go on for so long until the pain engulfs you and it becomes whom you are. Now, I'm not one to dwell on such things, okay so maybe I am, but nevertheless, shouldn't we all? Let's face it; there are probably more people in the world who spend more time in front of the mirror than they do actually doing something productive. I possibly being one of them. So, when anguish strikes in their own lives, they don't see it coming. It hits them ten times harder because they thought they were untouchable, or invincible rather and it almost kills them to find that horrible things can happen to anyone. No matter how young, old, rich, or poor you are things can happen. Because fate is something that you cannot control, that you cannot yell at or blame…but it's there and you can't fight it.

Things became awkward that night at dinner after I had confessed to Casey. We both were unusually quiet and not having our usual little dinnertime squabbles. My dad just sat there uncomfortably knowing to some extent what was wrong, well with me anyway. Nora looked from Casey to me uneasily as Edwin told an elaborate story about what he was studying in math class and how it bored the class to death.

"Umm…so Casey…" Nora said practically interrupting Edwin's last few comments, "Anything happen at school today?"

Casey barely made a movement to look up from her food, "No, same old, same old…"

Nora looked unhappily at her eldest daughter and then jolted her head to look at me "How 'bout you, Derek?"

I kept my eyes glued down "Umm…nothing really…"

Nora let out a harsh sigh and went on eating. After a while, it seemed she grew restless with the perturbed silence that overwhelmed the table. She looked up directly at Casey and stared her down for a while, until she finally commented, "Okay, what's up with you two?"

Casey and I didn't make any effort to answer and just kept on eating like we hadn't heard her.

"Casey, I asked you a question!" she stated, getting angrier by the second.

Casey didn't look up, but let out a sheepish laugh, "Oh, sorry mom, what…?"

She jerked her head to look at me accusingly, "Derek, what did you do?"

I opened my mouth to protest her allegation, but I was cut off.

"Oh, Nora…" my dad said obviously making it up as he was going along, "Derek, must have told Casey about Abby, she's probably, just upset…umm… Sometimes, Casey can be well, oversensitive."

Nora stared, my dad wasn't one to start a confrontation, he just wanted everyone to get along… "George!"

My dad unfazed looked up and stared at me, obviously feeling bad he put me in such an awkward position. "Umm…well anyway there is something I'd like to tell everyone… This is very hard to say… I'm sorry you have to hear this… Well, my first wife, Abby, Derek's, Edwin's, and Marti's mother, is very sick and she probably will not make it. I know Edwin and Marti don't know much about their mother, but tomorrow I would like to take you three to see her…if that's okay…with everyone…"

With "everyone" I think he meant me…

There was a ghostly silence cast over the room, as most thought over the information just said.

"Umm…I guess it's fine with me, I don't really remember her much…but this might be a weird way to remember her forever…on her death bed." Edwin said visibly taken aback with the information.

Nora had lightened up a bit it seemed, "Edwin, I think that it's very important for you to go…at least you'll have some memory of her… Some children grow up not knowing their parents and they wonder their whole lives what they're like."

I rolled my eyes openly at her.

Edwin gave her a half-hearted smile, "Well, when you put it that way it makes sense…I'll go dad."

My dad cracked a little smile as well, "What about you Marti?"

Marti bobbed in her seat not fully comprehending what was being discussed, "Is Smerek going?"

My dad stared at me "I…ahhh…"

I cut him off and simply stated, "No".

Nora looked at me strangely, "Why not Derek? You're the only one that can remember her any way… Why do you have so much against her?"

I stared at my plate, unable to think of what to say.

Luckily Casey jumped in, "Umm…well mom you know maybe Derek is waiting for a time to visit his mother with no one there…I know George has commented on their differences, maybe he just wants some privacy…"

Nora looked puzzled; obviously surprised Casey had stood up for me, "Well, today when George told Derek about it he did seem upset…and George did say something about differences…"

Edwin stared intently off into space, "I never heard about any differences… I mean I was like 5 or 6 when they got divorced…"

The conversation was awkward, to say the least, everyone watching what they were saying attentively, "Well, ya know Ed, umm you never had the best memory…I mean you probably don't even remember what she looked like…"

Casey shot me a look across the table; I stared back at her, as to say, "What did I do?"

Lizzie who didn't know the extent of what was going on stared at the wall, "Well, you know…no one seems very…uhh keen on the topic… Why don't we just drop it for now?"

Everyone agreed and I sunk in my chair and relaxed a bit.

Later that night, I had a lot of trouble sleeping. My dreams were plagued with thoughts of her and her unforgettable deeds. I remember her face when she did it, how she had no look of remorse. And I remember her laugh the laugh I only heard then…a cackle…like you hear on those Lifetime Original Movies, Casey's always watching. It seemed so real…it was scary.

We were sitting in the Kitchen, Marti wasn't born yet and neither was Ed…I had to be about two or three years old at the most. I remember it like it was only yesterday. I had dropped a bowl of mashed peas from my highchair and it was all over the once spotless kitchen floor. My mother was angry, not just mad; like red-hot angry…and I think that was the first time in my life I felt fear, well real fear. It wasn't the kind of fear like there was a monster under my bed fear, but the kind of fear like fear for my life.

Instead of grabbing a napkin or a paper towel from the counter she grabbed a knife. Not a butter knife, but a knife with a colossal blade, a butcher knife. I remember sitting there, not really knowing what was going on, but knowing something was wrong. She had this empty look in her eyes; just remembering it makes me shutter. She swung the knife at me, hitting the tray and sending me flying towards the ground. I might have been young and well not that smart, but I knew I had to get away from her.

I think then was the first time I had ever walked in my life. I don't know, instinct took over and I ran, I kept falling, but pretty soon I had made it to the basement. I hide in the corner, shaking from head to toe. She clamored down the stairs and it would be the only warning I received. She disappeared into the darkness of the room, I knew she was there, but I didn't know where.

The next thing I knew she came up from behind me and struck me with the knife in the lower abdomen region. I screamed bloody murder and ran.

She stopped swinging and she said one thing that will haunt me forever, "If you shut up, I'll stop and we'll have some fun!" There was an edge to her voice as it hit the cold basement air.

I shut my trap; I just wanted everything to stop, that's when I started crying.

We just stood there in silence for a while, until suddenly she grabbed me and pulled me to the ground. She stared at me eyes wider than I had ever seen them…I was petrified…I didn't know what to think.

She pulled down my pants, I didn't know what to think, and I just started crying harder.

She did her deed, as I stared off, not knowing what to do, what to say…I just cried the biggest, fattest tears I could ever remember seeing.

After she was done, she got up and left me there all alone on the ground…feeling helpless, bleeding like crazy, not knowing what had just happened. I laid there for about an hour before she came back…she knew she had to clean up her dirty work. She put Band-Aids over the deep cuts, but they were still bleeding. Then, she barked at me to go upstairs and take a bath.

I remember sitting the bathtub scrubbing myself until I bled more, because I felt dirty and the feeling wouldn't go away. I don't think it ever did, I think sometimes when I think about it I feel just as tainted as I did the first time…

I shot up from my bed, breathing heavy, drenched in sweat and ran to the bathroom across the hall, knowing I was going to lose my dinner and possibly some of my lunch. I bent my head down and saw Nora's meatloaf and mashed potatoes for the second time. Pretty soon, it turned to dry heaves and I leaned my head against the cold toilet bowl, looking for deliverance from my skillet of a forehead. I just sat there for a while breathing heavily. I was thinking about my dream, when I had to lean back over for more. After I was finished with my second go around I told myself I wasn't going to think about it in that deep regard anymore, or I wasn't going to be able to keep anything down. I kept telling myself that she couldn't hurt me anymore…I felt scared like I did when I was a kid at night, laying in bed unable to calm my restless mind, I thought she was going to come in my room…and touch me. I shuttered right there…I was still scared after all those years. I leaned my head back on the toilet bowl and sighed in pleasure of the freezing feeling that went through my skull.

"Derek!" I head a hesitant voice from behind me.

I pivoted my body to face Casey MacDonald standing in the doorway. "Y…yeah…" I said exhausted.

"Wh…what happened?" she said connecting the dots in her head.

I laughed a bit "Lost…m…my dinner…"

She stared at me "No, shit!"

She bent down and helped me up, but my body begged for me to sit back down.

"Whoa…what's the matter with you?" she asked relevantly concerned.

I sat down on top of the vanity's counter, "Shitty, dream…"

She went to open her mouth, but I cut her off.

"I don't want to talk about…"

She nodded, "Umm…okay…"

Silence engulfed the room, neither one of us knew what to say, "So…what are you going to do about…you know…your mom…"

I opened my mouth to answer, but had a sudden flashback. I leaped off the counter and found myself in my early position, puking my guts out.

Casey just stood there stunned, she had never seen anyone get that sick before, in an instant. Pretty soon she realized what see needed to do and sat behind me and rubbed my back. After I was finished she helped me sit on the ground a few feet away from the toilet. She stood up and flushed the former contents of my stomach away.

She stared at me, I looked half-conscious, "You really need to get some sleep, you look terrible…"

I laughed, "I thought I always looked terrible Case…"

She cracked a smile, remembering the moment, "Yeah, maybe you do…"

She sat down and ran her fingers threw my sweaty, matted hair, and turned to a serious tone, "Are you going to be okay, Derek?"

I started at her "Yeah, I'll be fine…"

She looked at me "Derek, I'm not so sure…"

I felt kind of bad for putting this all on her, "Case," I reassured her, "I'll be fine, I promise…"

I could see her eyes getting cloudy and tears forming, "Derek, you have to promise me, whatever happens, you're not going to… kill yourself…"

I pulled her into a hug, "I promise Case…I promise…"

She started crying harder, "Don't you ever Derek!"
"I promise Case, you know I won't…"

She calmed her voice a little, "I know, I know…"

After that, we sat like that for a while, she pulled away and helped me up and back to my room. That's where she left me sitting on my bed, alone with my thoughts and my thoughts only.

A/N: There you have it folks chapter 3! I hope you liked it! Sorry for grammar and/or spelling errors Shalom till next time!

-chickenboyssuck