Disclaimer: I do not own Sons of Anarchy, it's owned my the amazing Kurt Sutter, FX and everyone else who has the money to kick my ass in court if I don't have this up here. I do however own Taru, her horses and just about every other random that pops up in the story. This has come from the depths of my sick, insane, twisted, depraved mind and my madness fuel's it to keep going as do all my lovely fans that keep reading and reviewing.

HaylsValo: Yup and the next chap will have her in an even better mood but it make be a little while because I want to get out a piece of artwork at the same time so once I've finished that it'll be out.

tigger64: Definitely, I think they deserve a bit of time and a few before everything goes belly side up again don't you?

Without You – Motley Crue

Without you in my life
I'd slowly wilt and die
But with you by my side
You're the reason I'm alive
But with you in my life
You're the reason I'm alive
But without you, without you...

Without you, my hope is small
Let me be me all along
You let the fires rage inside
Knowing someday I'd grow strong

Silence

=Chibs' P.O.V=

I pulled to a halt outside the house and killed the engine of my Dyna before looking up at the house and sighed softly, my body ached; I was mentally, physically and emotionally drained after the day's events.

I slipped off my Dyna and stretched slightly trying to relieve the pain in my muscles before heading towards the front door, I'd expected Taru to be curled up on the couch with Buster but instead I found Esa sitting on the couch reading silently, Buster curled up on the floor at his feet, the pup stood wagging his tail and trotted over sniffing at me before nudging my hand.

I stroked behind his ears before placing my stuff on the small cabinet beside the front door before kicking off my shoes and nudging them away as I shut the front door over and flicked the locks across, a habit now.

"She's in the shower" Esa said motioning to a hall as he looked up from his book.

I nodded my thanks to Esa and headed down the hall stripping off my kutte and shirt dumping both in the bedroom before nudging open the bathroom door, the room was misty from steam but sitting on the edge of the sink were two thick dry towels.

I shut the door over silently and stripped off my jeans and boxers before pushing open the shower door and sliding in.

I circled my arms around Taru's stomach and felt her relax back against me as I rested my chin on her shoulder relishing in the contact and the warm water.

She turned, eye bloodshot and slightly raw.

"Love what's wrong?"

She tried to put a voice to her words. "Jax… Gemma…" She mumbled softly, a tear sparking in the corner of her eye. "It's gonna kill her if something happens to him inside"

I shook my head lightly. "Nothing's gonna 'appen ta Jackie boy, 'e's safe and well"

"What?" She wiped at the tear with confusion in her eyes.

"What we did, it was all one big fuck you ta Stahl and the ATF," I shook my head lightly drawing her close and placing a kiss on her forehead. "She's not gonna bother us anymore and we destroyed any papers that Jax signed or made 'im look like a rat, 'es safe," I rested my forehead against hers. "If anything they'll blame the IRA, their signature on the back of the car"

The questioning gaze behind her bloodshot eyes didn't need to be voiced, I knew exactly what she wanted to know and nodded lightly, a flicker of a smile coming to her lips before she drew me under the spray and ran her hands up through my hair kissing me softly.

She leant against me, weight shifting from one leg to the other in an attempt to relieve the ache her surgery had left her with. She stood under the spray of the water with me neither of us willing to destroy the comfortable silence by talking.

I laid out flat on the bed with Taru curled around my side and looked down as she began to peel at the tape keeping the bandage over my newest edition. I let her peel it back, wide eyes coming up to mine before she looked back to the tattoo, fingers ghosting over it as she took it in.

I watched as she traced the outline, it was her complete with a set of dark, broken angel wings wrapped around her body, her given name in a banner above it with both our flags underneath it, the entire thing took up my entire lower right forearm.

She shifted slightly laying a gentle kiss on my lips, fingers smoothing back a few strands of my hair as she rested her hand on my cheek. "Why?"

"Because ya my angel Taru, no matter 'ow much shit I've put ya through ya 'ave always stood beside me," I nuzzled her lightly. "I love ya and I want ya ta be mine, now and forever," I murmured. "I'm never lettin' ya go, not again" I shook my head willing the tears trying to force their way to my eyes to just die.

She smiled whisking away a tear as it escaped and planted a soft kiss on my lips clenching her fingers through my hair tugging softly, her hand trembling slightly as she released her grip with a soft groan.

I shifted tugging her down onto the bed again and laid down beside her again pulling her close and curling my arms around her shoulders. I laced my fingers through hers feeling a smile tug at my lips, we were almost free, almost free to live out the rest of our lives together, being free from Jimmy's thumb was a massive leap forward, it meant being able to rebuild and move forward, Kerrianne and I could finally see each other again, I could be in her life without having to worry about backlash from anyone or anything.

I tugged Taru closer and shifted before running a hand through her hair pushing back the black locks that had grown to reach her shoulders now. "Ya gonna cut ya 'air again?"

She glanced up shrugging lightly. "I like it short," She ran a hand up through it pulling out the damp strands so she could see it. "But if you think it would look good long then I'll grow it out"

I shook my head lightly. "Trim it," I shrugged lightly. "I like it"

She nodded lightly resting her head onto my chest exhaling with a soft sigh as she rested a hand across my torso; behind her eyes was a blankness, something missing, something that would probably take time to get back.

I listened to her hum softly before shifting and glancing down at her. "Sing"

She shifted against me before beginning to draw soft circles on my bare torso.

"Kerran vain haaveeni nähdä sain
En pienuutta alla tähtien tuntenut
Kerran sain kehtooni kalterit
Vankina sieltä kirjettä kirjoitan"

I could understand a word of what she sang but the way she did, it was soft, soothing, calming, each word rolling from one into the next with ease as she sung in her native tongue.

"Luojani, luoksesi anna minun tulla siksi miksi lapseni minua luulee

Sinussa maailman kauneus
Josta kuolema teki minusta taiteilijan

Luojani, luoksesi anna minun tulla siksi miksi lapseni minua luulee"

She hummed softly, her calloused finger still running in a light circle over my torso every so often changing its pattern to draw something else. She stopped humming briefly as she pressed a kiss to my chest resting her head back against it and moved her hand lacing her fingers through mine.

"Luojani, luoksesi anna minun tulla siksi miksi lapseni minua luulee

Oman taivaan tänne loin
Anna minun päästä pois

Oman taivaan tänne loin
Anna minun päästä pois"

I rubbed the apex of her thumb and index finger lightly before closing my eyes, the day's events finally catching up with me making me tired, I listened silently as she hummed and allowed myself to drift off with Taru clutched close.

Now the song is by Nightwish, it's called Kuolema Tekee Taiteilijan or Death Makes an Artist, the English translation for is it below.

Only once I could see my dream
Didn't feel the smallness under the stars
Once I got bars in my cradle
As a prisoner I write a letter from there

My Lord, to you, let me become what my child thinks I am
In you is the beauty of the world, of which death made me an artist
My Lord, to you, let me become what my child thinks I am

My own heaven I created here
Let me get away
My own heaven I created here
Let me get away

I recommend listening to it if you can find it, it's a really gorgeous song and as I said up the top the next one may be a little while because there's a piece of artwork to go with it.