A/N: I had something else written here, but that was written long ago, and I think it would be an inaccurate reflection of my opinions. So here are my notes after finishing it. FINISHED! Wow, it's been way too long. I haven't ever done something like this. I'm amazed that I updated this. Rest assured, the next chapter won't take this long. Then again.. the next chapter.. things will begin to get difficult, because my plot will have to diverge much more. Wish me the best of luck!
After class, I immediately grabbed Kyon's hand and forcefully dragged him out of the classroom, down the hall, and up the stairs to the one place where I could insure privacy for my brilliant idea: In front of the door leading to the rooftop.
The door is usually locked, and it had slowly become a giant storage space for the Art Club. There were giant canvases, broken picture frames, fragmented statues, and other bits of junk.
"I need your help."
I grabbed Kyon's tie with one hand and stared at him intently.
"Help you with what?"
Is he pretending to be stupid?
I humored him.
"Help me make a new club!"
"OK, then tell me, why must I help you complete something that you just suddenly thought?"
I ignored him and continued.
"Because I need to secure a room for the club as well as members, so you need to find out what paperwork needs to be done for the school."
Knocking my hand away, Kyon gave me a look.
"What club are you trying to make?"
"It doesn't matter! What's important is to make a club first. Now listen! After school today, you go and find out what needs to be done, and I'll go and find a room for the club. Okay?"
I turned and ran down the stairs, not bothering to confirm with Kyon. I'm sure he would understand what needed to be done. I made my way to the Old Complex. I already knew of one room that we could use. From my daily wanderings, there weren't any rooms that were not occupied. However, based on my research there was one club that had no members. The Literature Club, thanks to all the third year students graduating this spring, had a membership of zero, meaning that it was going to get canceled. Opening the door, I was greeted by the sight of a person sitting by the window on a metal chair, reading an enormous hardcover book. Aside from an occasional turning of the page, she made no movements. It was a large room, containing only a table, and few metal chairs similar to the one the girl was sitting on, and a bookshelf.
"Hi, are you a member of the Literature Club?" A nod.
"Can I use this room for my club activities?" Another nod.
"If I am able to read here, there is no problem." With this in mind, I returned to class, having successfully found a room to hold all our operations. What those operations were, I had yet to figure out myself, but those details weren't important. All that mattered was that my club was well on its way to formation.
As the bell rang, signaling the end of another day of boring classes, I immediately grabbed Kyon's arm and pulled him out of the classroom, dragging him along.
"Where are we going?" He appeared confused.
"The Club Room, of course!"
Shoving people out of my way, I exited the first floor hallway. Continuing at top speed, I entered the Old Complex and went up the stairs, while continuing to drag Kyon along, who was beginning to look a bit irritated. It's fine though. I'm sure he'll love the club room so much he'll forgive me for this.
Stopping outside the same room, I finally let go of Kyon's arm. Naturally, he also stopped moving.
"Here it is."
"Literature Club?"
I ignored him and opened the door. The girl whom I had seen last time was still sitting in the same place, reading a book, as if she had not moved from the spot at all since last time.
"From now on this will be our club room." Opening my arms, I stretched them wide apart dramatically. I beamed at Kyon. "Well, what do you think?"
"Wait a second, what is this place?" He looked confused.
"The Cultural and Arts club building. This school has art and music rooms for the Art Club and the Orchestra Club. Everyone else has to hold their meetings and such in this building, known as the Old Complex. This particular classroom belongs to the Literature Club."
"Then what about the Literature Club?" Kyon asked with a quizzical expression.
"After all the third year students graduated this spring, the club has zero members. As no new members were recruited, the club was going to be canceled. By the way, she's a first year who's their only new member."
"Then they haven't been canceled yet!"
Grumbling, I gave him a look.
"Close enough! A club with only one member is the same as none." I was disappointed that Kyon did not share my enthusiasm for the new club room.
During this time, the girl with classes and short hair did not even lift her head once, let alone even glance at us. Apart from occasionally flipping the page with her fingers, she did not move, completely ignoring our presence. She was a strange girl.
Kyon had noticed the girl as well. He was looking at her with interest.
"Then what about that girl?" Kyon whispered to me.
"She said it doesn't matter!"
"Really?" This was coupled with an expression of disbelief. As if he needed to doubt me! I explained again.
"I asked her already at lunch time. I said I need her to lend me the room and she said 'go ahead,' as long as she can read her book here in peace. Now that you mention it, she is pretty weird."
Glancing at the Literature Club girl one more time, I missed the bemused look Kyon gave me. She had pale skin and a neutral face, completely devoid of emotion. She read at a constant rate, almost robot-like. I admit – her short hair suited her pretty face. But indeed, she felt strange!
As I was staring, she lifted her head and pushed the nose bridge of her glasses up with her fingers.
She stared at me, expressionless.
"Nagato Yuki."
So that's what her name was.
"Say, Nagato-san," Kyon started to say. "This girl here wants to use your club room for a yet-to-be-named club. Is that alright with you?" Again? Honestly, how many times do I have to explain that she said okay? I sighed.
"Yes."
"But it might be troublesome for you." My frustration mounted.
"It doesn't matter."
"Maybe you'll even be evicted?"
"Please feel free."
I interrupted this game of convince-Yuki-to-say-no.
"Okay, then it's decided. From now on, we will meet in this club room after class. Be sure to come! Or you're as good as dead!" I added the last part while look straight at Kyon to make my meaning clear.
"Oh, and Kyon, how's the progress on the paperwork coming along?"
"Well, I haven't a-"
"We can sort everything else later," I waved a hand, interrupting him. "Right now the most important thing is to recruit members. We still need at least two more people."
"So, you've already counted the Literature Club girl in as well? Are you seriously treating her as a club accessory or something?" Kyon gave me an exasperated look.
"Don't worry about that, I'll be able to gather people soon. I already have someone in mind!"
My mind went immediately thought of Mikuru, and how deliciously cute she was.
The next day passed without much event. After yelling at Kyon to go ahead of me, I raced out of the classroom towards Mikuru's classroom. Running down the halls, I easily dodged the students that were slowly filling up the hallway. Bursting through the door, I announced,
"Mikuru, you're coming with me!" As if expecting this, she bolted like a rabbit being hunted. "Oh, you can't run away from me!" I shouted with glee. Moving around the desks, I closed in on my prey. Sensing that I was nearing, Mikuru sped up, and pushed a few desks to block my path as she ran out the door. Only momentarily stalled, I leapfrogged the desks and quickly caught up to her. She attempted to sidestep me, but went straight into the wall of the hallway instead. I took this opportunity to grab her wrist and started to drag her back to the clubroom. Flailing, she feebly attempted to escaped, but I easily defended her efforts.
Upon arriving at the clubroom, I kicked up the door and shouted, "Hey, sorry I'm late! It took me some time to catch this girl." Waving at the two in the room, I pushed Mikuru in and then closed and locked the door.
"W… what are you doing?" She said, looking as if about to cry.
"W-where is this place? Why did you bring me here? And, w-why are you locking the door? What do you want with me?"
"Be quiet!" I shouted. Then, turning to the other two, "Let me introduced her: this is Asahina Mikuru-chan." Pleased with myself, I turned to look at Kyon.
"Where did you abduct her from?" He asked, giving me a look that was far from being happy with the current situation. I was disappointed.
"This isn't abduction! I just forced her to come with me."
"That's the same thing!" Choosing to ignore this comment, I answered his first question.
"I found her daydreaming in the second year classroom, so I caught her from there. I explore the corners of the school during lunch, so I've seen her a few times already. Anyways, she's our sempai!"
"So?"
I was left at a loss for words. Why didn't he understand this was all part of the masterful plan?
"Fine then... tell me, why did you need to find her, erm, Asahina-san, right?" Kyon directed the last part at Mikuru.
This part was easy – finally it was dawning on him, or so I hoped.
"Here, have a look." I pointed at her face, causing her to jump back a few feet.
"Isn't she cute? I believe moe characters are important!" Kyon gave me a look of disbelief
"… Excuse me? What did you just say?"
"I said moe! The factor to turn people on! Basically, most detective stories have some character that would turn people on and cause them to be pitied."
This girl had a small body and a face that could easily be mistaken for that of an elementary student, with a pair of large puppy dog eyes that gave out a "please protect me" aura. She had brown curly hair that hung over her back. Needless to say, I was slightly jealous.
"And that's not all!" Moving behind her, I grabbed her breasts.
"Kyaaaa!"
Mikuru-chan screamed immediately. Ignoring her screams of protest, I continued to grope her breasts.
"Aaaaaa!"
"She's so small, yet her breasts are bigger than mine! A cute face plus large breasts is also an important factor in turning people on!"
They were bigger than they appeared. My jealously flared up again. "Wow, they really are big."
Moving my hands into her uniform, I started to feel around some more. I was met with the feeling of large breasts.
"Man, this pisses me off! Her face is so cute, yet her breasts are bigger than mine!"
"H-help!"
Mikuru-chan was blushing crimson by this point. She flailed her arms and legs, attempting to break free. As if she could match me, ha! As I moved my hand towards her skirt, Kyon approached and pulled me off.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Disappointed, I looked at Mikuru-chan.
"But they are really huge! It's true! Why don't you give them a feel?"
At this, Mikuru-chan moaned weakly. Kyon shrugged his shoulders.
"No thanks. Anyways, please don't tell you're thinking… the only reason for bringing Asahina-san here is because she's cute and has large breasts?"
Glad to see he was catching on, I replied. "Why, of course!"
Kyon put a hand on his face.
"A mascot character like her is necessary!" Directing my attention towards Mikuru, I continued.
"Mikuru-chan, are you with any other clubs?"
"Y-yes… the Calligraphy Club…"
"Quit that! It'll get in the way of my club activities."
Mikuru-chan hesitated a moment before noticing the presence of Yuki. She then turned back to me and whispered in a low voice.
"I see... I understand. I'll quite the Calligraphy Club and join your club. But I don't know what the Literature Club does."
"We're not the Literature Club." I said, clearly up any confusion.
"We're just temporarily borrowing this room for our club activities. The club you have joined is actually a new association that Suzumiya Haruhi will create in the near future. We don't know what activities there will be; we don't even have a name." Kyon quickly cut in to explain to the confused Mikuru. Unfortunately, this served only to further confuse her.
"…What?"
He continued. "Oh, and the one sitting over there, she's the real Literature Club member."
"Oh…" Mikuru-chan continued to be speechless.
"Ah, but that's where you're wrong Kyon! I've just thought of a name!" I beamed at Kyon and smacked Mikuru-chan on the shoulder.
"Okay, let's hear it." Kyon didn't look too excited, but I'm sure he would love it.
"This club will hereafter be named 'Sekai wo Ooini moriagerutame no Suzumiya Haruhi no Dan'. The Save the world by Overloading it with fun: Suzumiya Haruhi Brigade, shorted to SOS Brigade."
Kyon looked shocked. I'm sure he was just in awe of my brilliant name.
"Be sure to meet here after school every day!" I ordered, and then called it a day. I left and headed home myself to brainstorm more ideas for the club. As I left, an idea struck me: We needed a computer. In this day and age, it just wouldn't be right for my club to not be connected to the Internet. I headed down to the local electronics store before going home.
As I entered the store, a sales attendant approached me.
"Hello miss, welcome to Circuit Buy. Are you looking for anything in particular today?"
"Hi there, I'm looking to buy a computer. Can you show me the latest models?"
"Certainly, right this way." Motioning for me to follow him, he walked towards a display in the middle of the store. "Over here we have the McDell 1500x series that was just released a few weeks ago. It'll cover all your gaming and graphics needs. And if that doesn't sui-"
"Okay, thanks. Could I have a list of the most recent models?" I said, interrupting his chatter.
"I apologize, but something like that is not readily available. However, if you would like, I can go in the back and print out a list for you." Gesturing towards the back of the store, the man started to walk in that direction.
"Absolutely! That would be excellent!" I smiled and turned back to play with the computers. A few minutes later, he came back with the list.
"Thank you very much." Grabbing the list, I turned and started to walk out.
"Thank you for visiting Circuit Buy. Please come again."
On my way home, I looked at the list. It was just a simple print-out of model numbers and date of release, but it would suffice. I already had a plan for how to get a computer, and it was absolutely brilliant. I smiled to myself as I imagined the plan in action.
I had a conversation with Kyon one day while discussing ideas about the club. It went something like this.
"You know what we need next?"
"Who knows!"
"I'm thinking of finding a mysterious transfer student."
"Please tell me the definition of a 'mysterious' transfer student."
"Those that get transferred two months after the school term has started are definitely mysterious transfer students. What do you think?" I asked Kyon with a serious expression.
"Maybe it's because their parents got a job transfer and they just had to come along."
"No, that would be too forced and unnatural!"
"Then what is natural for you? I'd really like to know."
Ignoring him, I continued to think to myself.
"Mysterious transfer student… will they ever appear?"
"You never really listen to what I say, do you?"
Another day.
I noticed Kyon being harassed by his friend Tani-something or whatever. Rumors seemed to be flying around that Kyon and I were plotting something. Not that it bothered me, but it seemed Kyon was irritated by it.
"Hey, just what are you up to with Haruhi?" Taniguchi asked Kyon. "You're in a relationship, are you?"
When Kyon didn't say anything, Taniguchi continued.
"Try not to do anything ridiculous – you're no longer junior high students! If they find out that you've vandalized the school track field or something like that, you might get suspended!"
At this, I was about to go over and start telling off Taniguchi when the teacher came in, signaling the beginning of lessons, so I instead headed to my seat behind Kyon.
Bit by bit, I moved things that I deemed useful into the clubroom. Altogether in the clubroom there now was a portable hanger cabinet, a flask and cups, a teapot, a CD/MD playing radio, a freezer, cooking pan, bowl, a bunch of cooking utensils, and a black triangular pyramid paperweight with the words Brigade Commander on it. Everything was generously given to me by various other clubs and associations, with the exception of the paperweight. I found the paperweight at a pawn shop a few days beforehand, and bought it immediately because it was just too perfect.
But there was one thing that I couldn't manage to get my hands on.
"I so want a computer! In this information age, we don't even have a computer. This won't do!"
Everyone was present and accounted for as usual. Yuki-chan was reading a book in her usual spot, Mikuru-chan was sitting obediently on a steel chair, looking confused, and Kyon was standing in a corner.
"I'm going to obtain one now!" Jumping off the desk that I was sitting on, I approached Kyon with a grin on my face.
"Obtain one, you mean a computer? From where? You don't plan on robbing an electronics store, do you?"
"Of course not! The nearest electronics store is too far away. I was thinking of somewhere closer. Follow me!" Granted, I had visited that store previously to get a list of models, but that was beside the point.
I ran out the door and motioned for Kyon and Mikuru-chan to follow me. Moving two doors down, we arrived at the Computer Study Group.
"Here, take this." I handed Kyon an instant camera.
"Now listen carefully! I'll tell you the plan, and you must follow it no matter what! You only have one chance." I pulled Kyon down and whispered my plan in his ear.
"What? You can't do that!"
"Does it matter?" Ignoring his protests, I handed him a disposable camera and then knocked on the Computer Study Group room door.
"Hello there! I've come to collect a computer from you!"
Inside the room there were numerous desks, all covered with computers and other related technologies. The only sound to be heard was the computer fans whirling away. The four boys sitting at their computers all looked at me, confused.
"Who's in charge here?" Smiling, I addressed them.
"I'm the president, can I help you?"
Giving him an irritated look, I sighed.
"Do I have to repeat myself? I just said, give me a computer."
The president shook his head violently and looked at me with a shocked expression.
"Sorry, I can't do that. Because the school doesn't fund us enough, these computers are all bought with our hard-earned money! We can't just give them to you for free. Do you think we're fools?"
I remained unconvinced.
"What does it matter? Just one would do, you have plenty anyways!"
"That… wait a minute, who are you guys anyways?"
"I'm Haruhi Suzumiya, commander of the SOS Bridgade and these are my subordinates. Now, I command you, in the name of the SOS Brigade: hand over a computer at once! Don't give me any excuses!"
"I don't know who you guys are, but absolutely not! You can go buy your own computers!" The president vehemently shook his head.
Perfect! My plan would now come into action.
"Since you've said that, I guess there's no other way. We'll have to use other means."
Grabbing Mikuru-chan, who was conveniently standing next to me, I pushed her towards the president. Using my other hand, I grabbed the hand of the president and placed it on Mikuru-chan's breast.
"Kyaaa~!"
"Wha?"
"Now Kyon!"
Click!
To make sure our plan was a success, I held onto Mikuru-chan, preventing her from escaping. At the same time, I pushed the president's hand harder into her breast.
"Kyon! One more picture!"
As I was about to move the president's other hand under Mikuru-chan's skirt, he finally broke free.
"What the hell do you think you're doing!" He shouted furiously, blushing a deep crimson.
Waving a finger at him, I gave him a warning look.
"Uh uh uh! We now have photographic evidence of you sexually harassing our members! If you don't want the school to know about these photos, then hand over the computer!"
"You've gotta be kidding me! What kind of sick joke is this?" He continued to protest. "You forcefully grabbed my hand! I'm innocent!"
Laughing, I smirked at him. "Oh really? You can explain all you want, but who's going to believe you?"
Meanwhile, Mikuru-chan had been paralyzed by the shock and was now lying on the ground motionless. The president continued his senseless struggle, however.
"My members are witnesses to my innocence! That was not of my own will!"
At this, the other members of the club all nodded their heads in agreement.
"Well, in that case, I'll just say you guys gang-raped her!"
That was the final straw. At this, everyone's faces turned white.
"So, how about it? Are you giving us one or not?"
I was mildly entertained by the president's face, which went from the blushing crimson, to a shocked white, to a depressed dark shade of purple. In the end, however, I was victorious!
"Just pick one and get out!"
Having said that, he sat down dejectedly. His subordinates all rushed to his side to support him.
"President!"
"Get a hold of yourself!"
"Are you alright?"
Ignoring this show, I asked the members.
"Which one is the latest model?" I asked the members who were now on the floor with the president. Suddenly I remembered the list. "On second thought, never mind."
Pulling out the list of latest models, I looked around the room to match one of them. After examining every computer, I found the newest one.
"I want this one." Pointing to the computer that the president had been working on.
"W… wait! We just bought that one last month!"
"Camera"
"…Take it, you thieves!"
Unplugging everything, I picked up the monitor. As I carried it out of the room, I indicated that Kyon should take the rest. After everything had been moved into our headquarters, I ordered the Computer Study Group to set up our network as well. Any sign of resistance was immediately quelled with the threat of the camera.
Everything was going as planned. As for our website, I already had a logo in mind.
The computer was set up on the desk with the "Brigade Commander" pyramid.
Turning towards Kyon, I said, "Since you're so free, you might as well make the website. I'm busying looking for the remaining members!"
Sitting at my desk, I started surfing the web. I needed to order something attention-getting to hand out some fliers. Browsing an online costume shop, I found the perfect thing, but it was a bit expensive. With shipping, I could only afford two. That wasn't a big deal though – that would be enough. After completing my purchase, I turned my attention back to Kyon.
"Have it completed in the next day or two. We won't be able to do anything without a webpage."
Glancing around the room, everything seemed to be in order. Mikuru-chan was huddled over the desk, sitting next to Yuki-chan, who was reading a book as usual, ignoring everything.
Standing up, I collected my belongings and began to head out.
"You guys are dismissed for today. And, Kyon, don't forgot to finish the website. It's of utmost importance, so don't delay!" Giving him a look to express my attitude, I opened the door and was about to head out before Kyon stopped me.
"What's going to happen if the school finds out that our "association" is using their bandwidth to host a website?"
"It's alright as long as they don't find out! If they find it, we'll just close it down. It's not a big deal."
I couldn't wait for the costumes to arrive. In the meantime, there would be flyers to make.
Two days later, during lunch, I headed to the clubroom. Only Yuki-chan was there, sitting as usual, reading a thick hardcover book as usual. I went to the computer to check on the website's progress.
It was a simple page that said 'Welcome to the SOS Brigade Home Page' at the top. We also had an e-mail network set up as well. Kyon had put a decent amount of work into the website, even if it was mostly empty. Maybe I'll promote him.
"Hey, Yuki-chan, do you have any ideas for this website?"
Without looking up, she replied.
"Not really."
After checking whether the page could load properly, I turned off the computer and got up. A hand on my shoulder made me spin around suddenly. Yuki-chan was standing behind me, holding the book.
"Take this."
She placed the book in my hands. Instinctively, I grabbed onto it. It was heavy!
Staring at me with her expressionless face, she said, "For you." After which she exited the room without a glance back. Speechless, I merely stared at the door that she had just exited. That was surely strange! Why would she be lending such a large book to me? I'm not bad at reading, but I usually don't like to read. Puzzling over this, I nearly didn't hear the bell ringing that signaled the end of lunch.
As I entered the classroom, I saw Kyon had already returned to his seat. Sitting down, I poked him in the back with my pencil.
"Good job with the website."
Kyon turned around, seemingly surprised that I had given him a compliment. As if I was that kind of person! I give compliments when they are warranted.
"It's still a very simple, incomplete website. But it has an e-mail server, I suppose." He replied, shrugging his shoulders. "Why did you want an e-mail address anyways? Can't you just use your own?"
"Idiot! That won't do! What if a lot of people sent their e-mails to me and flooded my inbox?" Hitting him on the head with my pencil, I gave him an irritated look.
"Why would a newly registered e-mail suddenly get flooded? No one would really know about it…"
"That's a secret" Smiling mysteriously, I sat back and doodled in my notebook. As an afterthought, I added:
"You'll know once school has ended today, but until then, it's top secret!"
I skipped sixth period to make copies of my flier. Thankfully no one was there during the time, as everyone was in class, but I had to dodge a few teachers. After my task was done, I went to my locker as the bell was ringing to signal the end of the day. Placing the fliers in the bag along with my secret costumes, I took everything and headed towards the clubroom.
Everyone had already arrived by the time I got there.
"Sorry guys, I was delayed." Setting down the paper bag, I turned and locked the door. Mikuru-chan twitched reflexively at the sound of the door click.
"Suzumiya-san, what are you planning today? I'll be honest, I'm not going to do anything like plundering and blackmailing like we did last time."
Giving a mock shocked expression, I turned to look at him.
"What are you talking about? I'd never do such a thing!"
"Really? Then how do you explain that computer?"
"That was acquired through peaceful means! Anyways, first things first, look at these." Pulling out the fliers, I handed one to Kyon. "These are fliers made to introduce the SOS Brigade to everyone. It took me a lot of effort to sneak into the copy room to print these fliers, so be thankful I didn't ask you!"
"The SOS Brigade founding principle:
We, the SOS Brigade, are seeking all sorts of paranormal events in this world. We welcome anyone who has experienced, is experiencing, or feels that they will experience any kind of supernatural or mysterious events to come see us for a consultation. We will do our best to answer your questions. Please note, however, that we do not handle normal paranormal events – It must be a paranormal event that we deem to be very shocking. Please send all e-mail to .net." Looking up after reading the flier, I looked at the three of them. "Well, what do you guys think?"
Yuki-chan was expressionless as usual, Kyon had put a hand to his face, and Mikuru-chan was looking puzzled. Regardless of their responses, there was no time to waste.
"Alright, time to hand out the fliers."
"Where do we do that?" Kyon asked, picking up a bundle of fliers.
"At the school entrance. Right now there's still a lot of students who haven't gone home yet. You don't have to go, just Mikuru-chan and I will go."
"What?"
Mikuru-chan looked at me blankly while holding a flier. I turned back to the paper bag and pulled out the costume.
"Ta-da!"
I emptied the contents of the bag onto the table: A black leotard, net stockings, bunny ears, bow tie, white cuffs, and a bunny tail.
"What are those for?" Mikuru-chan asked nervously.
"You should know. To dress up as a bunny girl!" I said simply.
"Y-you wouldn't want me to wear that, w-would you?"
"Of course! I even bought one for you!"
"I… I'm not wearing that!"
"Don't worry, the size will fit you perfectly. I remember your sizes."
"Y-you what…? I-I mean, t-that's not the problem! You wouldn't want me to w-wear that at the school entrance, would you?"
"Why of course." This was getting rather boring.
"No! I don't wanna!"
"Stop complaining!" I leapt at Mikuru-chan, and sat down on her torso, while stripping her of her sailor uniform top.
"Nooo!!!" She cried, struggling helplessly. It was too cute. Unabated, I continued to work.
"Now be a good girl and don't move!" After pulling off her top, I shifted my weight and moved towards her skirt.
"DON'T LOOK!" She shouted over my shoulder.
Hm. She must've been referring to Kyon, because it's not like I haven't seen her with her clothes off. Hearing the door unlock, open, and close behind me confirmed that thought. Shortly, I had Mikuru-chan stripped completely, with hardly any trouble, aside from the screams of 'No!' and 'Stop!' which were easy to ignore.
"Put these on. I'm sure you don't need my help to wear them." Handing her the costume, I began to strip as well. As I took off my skirt, I glanced at Yuki-chan. She was reading another book, as if nothing had happened. Does that girl respond to anything?
Placing my uniform on the table, I dressed up in the costume. Adjusting the tail and the ears took a bit of work, but they were pretty simple. Everything attached rather cleverly. Lastly, I put on the heels that I had brought for this occasion. I glanced over to see how Mikuru-chan was doing. She had finished dressing in the costume, but was having trouble zipping it up in the back. She sat there, crying while making half-attempts at zipping up the back. Walking over to her, I zipped the back up for her.
"You can come in now!" I shouted to Kyon.
He paused for a moment after coming in, obviously a bit shocked. Perfect!
"What do you think?" Since he was speechless, I continued. "This is going to grab everyone's attention. At this rate, people will definitely come to get the flyers!"
Kyon sighed, and gave me an exasperated look.
"If you wear such strange costumes out in the open, people are going to look at you funny… Wait a minute, how come Nagato-san doesn't need to wear this?"
"I only bought two sets. Since they came with all these accessories, they were pretty expensive."
"Where'd you buy this stuff anyways?"
"On the web."
"…I see."
Picking up the paper fliers, I threw them into the now empty paper bag. As I walked past Kyon, I noticed that I was taller than he was with the heels on.
"Let's go, Mikuru-chan. Also, don't forget the bag with the fliers." Mikuru-chan had crossed her arms in front of her chest and was refusing to get up from her chair. Sighing, I walked over to her and pulled the now sobbing Mikuru-chan off of the table. Dragging her with one arm, while carrying the paper bag with the other, I left the room and headed for the front entrance.
I didn't meet anyone on my way out of the Old Complex, but as soon as I left the building, I ran into a lot of people.
"Good afternoon Suzu- what the hell are you doing?"
"Asahina-san? What are you doing with Suzumiya-san?"
These comments, and the people that said them, continued to follow us all the way to the school entrance. Perfect. The attention-getting was a resounding success.
At the main entrance I stopped and let go of Mikuru. Turning to face the school, I began to force fliers onto people.
"Hi, my name is Haruhi Suzumiya, and I'm the leader of the SOS Brigade!" Stuff the flier into the boy's hand, I turned away and approached another person. Meanwhile, Mikuru clutched her chest, ignoring everyone's attention. How annoying! She wasn't even trying, and she was already gathering a large group of boys! I stomped over to where she was and slapped a flier onto everyone's chest while simultaneously pushing them away.
"Mikuru-chan, I'm going to punish you if you don't start working!" I threatened her with a glare. She jumped up and attempted to publicize weakly.
"U-um… excuse me, but would you please take a flier? We're p-part of the SOS Bri-"
"No thanks." The girl walked off quickly before turning around and giving us a funny look.
"No no no! You're doing it wrong!" Waving my arms around, I berated her pathetic attempts.
As I continued to hand out fliers, I noticed a group of staff members approaching. Ignoring them, I continued to flier.
"Suzumiya-san, what on Earth are you doing!" One of the teachers shouted at me when she neared.
"I am simply advertising for my club. That is allowed, right?" I replied nonchalantly.
"Yes, it is allowed, but think about what you're doing! You can't just advertise whenever you please, and especially not while wearing something that provocative on school grounds! Change immediately! And that goes for you as well Asahina-san. Now I expect when I look out here 10 minutes from now, you two will not be standing here wearing ridiculous outfits!"
As Mikuru-chan began to head towards the door, I told for her to wait. Turning back to the teacher, I asked.
"What is so wrong with my outfit? I am merely wearing it to get a bit of attention! Can't you see that?" By now, quite a large crowd had gathered to watch.
"It's against school rules, and I have the full right to suspend you if you continue to stand here arguing with me." His word was final. With that, I picked up the rest of the fliers and stormed back to the clubroom.
"Hold on, we're going to go see the principal first!" The teacher shouted after me. Pausing, I turned around. Heaving a sigh, I followed him towards the principal's office. After ignoring a stern lecture from the principal, and my own teacher, and pretending to apologize, I was finally allowed to go. Mikuru-chan had already gone ahead of me. Entering the clubroom, I slammed the door and sat down in a huff on a nearby chair. Scowling, I complained aloud.
"Damn them! What the hell, those damn teachers! They always get in the way!"
"Is there a problem?"
"Of course there is a problem! I hadn't even handed out half the fliers and in comes a stupid teacher asking us to stop handing them out! What the hell is wrong with him?"
Ignoring the funny look Kyon gave me, I continued. "Mikuru-chan was nearly in tears, and I got a lecture from the principal and then another one from our teacher! Man, this pisses me off! That's it for today! Dismissed!" I started undressing angrily. Kyon beat a retreat to the door as I started to unzip the back. "How long are you going to cry like that? Hurry up and change!" I snapped at Mikuru-chan, who was now dissolved in a puddle of her own tears on the floor.
Leaving everyone else to clean up, I headed home in a bad mood. The next day, Mikuru-chan was absent from school. After yesterday's incident, I received a flood of attention. Unfortunately, most of it was rather subtle. I'd catch hints and whispers as I walked through the halls and I'd notice people stealing glances at me. During break, Asakura Ryouko came over and had a word with me.
"It's good that you're having fun and making friends, Suzumiya-san, but yesterday's incident was just way overboard. I advise you to not repeat such an incident."
I pretended not to hear her and continued to stare out the window. As the bell rang to signal the end of class, I quickly cleared away my things and rushed to the clubroom. Hopping onto the computer, I logged onto our e-mail account. Bah! No new e-mails.
"Why isn't anyone sending any mail in?" I complained to Kyon, who had somehow gotten there before me.
"There wasn't any yesterday nor today. Maybe everyone does have experiences they could tell, but they can't just trust a suspicious-looking club like ours?"
Walking over to Kyon, I looked at him.
"Mikuru-chan took the day off today, I hear?"
"Maybe she's not coming back. Such a poor girl, I hope she's not traumatized by yesterday's events."
Scowling, I glanced at my backpack.
"Damn, and I prepared a new costume for her to try on today!"
"Can't you try them on yourself?"
"Of course I can! It's just that it'll be too boring without Mikuru-chan."
Glancing over at Yuki-chan, who was still enough to be considered almost an object in this room, I shook my head. Imagining her in a bunnygirl outfit was just too strange.
A few weeks later:
A transfer student had arrived!
I excitedly shared this news with Kyon before homeroom.
"Don't you think it's great? The transfer student's really coming!"
Beaming, I leaned towards him.
"Ah, I heard something like that. Supposedly he's going to be in Class 1-9."
"This is a chance in a lifetime. It's a pity the student isn't in the same class, but it's definitely a mysterious transfer student, there's no mistake!"
"You haven't even met him or her, so how do you even know if it's a mysterious transfer student?"
"Didn't I say before? A high percentage of those that get transferred in the middle of the school term are abnormal."
I didn't bother baying attention during the first period, as my mind was abuzz with this news of a new transfer student. After the first period bell rang, I instantly bolted out of the classroom to class 1-9. Pushing aside a few students who were exiting the room, I forced my way in.
"Is there a new transfer student here?"
"Ah, yes, that would be me. And whom do I have the pleasure of addressing?"
Surprised, I turned around. A skinny figure with a contented smile, kind eyes, and a handsome face.
"So, mysterious transfer student, what is your name?" I questioned him directly to hide my surprise.
"Well, I don't know about being mysterious, but I am certainly a transfer student. My name is Itsuki Koizumi. A pleasure to make your acquaintance, I'm sure." He bowed quickly and smiled at me.
"Are you an alien, time traveler or an esper?"
He didn't even flinch at my question.
"My goodness, not to my knowledge. Although it certainly would be wonderful to have extraterrestrial powers, or superhuman abilities, right?" He continued in that same aloof air.
My patience was wearing thin. This guy was as normal as could be!
I asked him a few more questions, to which he replied with completely ordinary answers. I glanced at the clock on the wall, noticed that I only had a minute left, and ran back towards my own classroom. Just before the bell rang to signal the beginning of class, I returned to my seat, confused.
"So, is it a mysterious transfer student?"
"Hmm, doesn't feel like one. We talked, but I still don't have enough information. Maybe they're putting up a front as a normal person. I believe that's highly probable. After all it's not like they would expose their real identities on the day they transferred. I'll go ask again next recess."
"Is the transfer student a girl or a guy?"
"Though there's a possibility of a disguise, he appears to be a guy."
Lost in thought, I spent the rest of the day running back and forth between my classroom and the new guy's classroom, trying to catch him off-guard with surprise questions. Each time I was met with defeat. Little did I know that, indeed this student was not as he appeared, and that some strange events would happen.
Where should I even start?
How about when I first brought the transfer student to the clubroom?