Narrator: Mario beat Shadow Mario yet again in episode 7 of Ricco Harbor. Much to his dismay, he had to fight another Piranha Plant in order to gain access to Gelato Beach. Despite FLUDD's protests, Mario decided to take a little rest there....
Mario: I've decided to take a little rest here.
FLUDD: That would not be a wise decision, Mario.
Mario: And why not?
FLUDD: Because I'll kill you if you do.
Mario: Yeah? What am I going to do, suffocate in your Idiot Stopper of Death?
FLUDD uses his Idiot Stopper, and Mario starts to suffocate. He wipes the foam off his face and glares at FLUDD.
FLUDD: Yes, I will use my Idiot Stopper of Death.
Mario: Well, too bad! Not much you can do if I take you off, huh?
Mario pulls FLUDD off his back and drops him in the sand.
Mario: Goodbye, FLUDD! Be good while I'm gone having fun!
FLUDD: Does he honestly think he will?
Mario kicks his shoes off and lays down in the sand. He closes his eyes and basks in the sun. A giant wave of water crashes over him. He sputters, spits the salt water from his mouth, puts on his now very soggy shoes, and walks away.
Mario: Hey, what's this? A juice shop? Looks like fun!
Mario walks inside and leans on the counter, acting cool.
Mario: Hey, man. Wassup? Can I have a li'il juice here?
Pianta: Dude, we don't accept freaks here.
Mario: [rolls his eyes and becomes normal] How much would a smoothie cost?
Pianta: It'll run you ten coins for our standard smoothie.
Mario: That's a bit pricey. It'd better be good.
Pianta: Of course it is. But we have a better option. It's more expensive, but we call it the Surprise Smoothie.
Mario: What's so surprising about it?
Pianta: The price.
Mario: Fifty coins!?! No way!
Pianta: Yes way. But we highly recommend it, mostly because we get the money.
Mario: What's in the Surprise Smoothie?
Pianta: That's also part of the surprise. You wanna try it?
Mario hesitates, then puts fifty coins on the counter.
Mario: Hit me.
The Pianta punches him in the face.
Mario: No! You idiot! "Hit me" was slang for "give me the smoothie"!
The Pianta shrugs, then pulls out a green smoothie.
Pianta: Try and guess what the flavor is.
Mario grabs the smoothie and drinks half of it in one gulp. He couldn't be sure, but it sort of tasted like crab meat, seaweed, and coconuts. Mario drops it and clutches his throat. The smoothie glass shatters.
Mario: What IS that nasty stuff!?!
Pianta: You probably don't want to know. Now that's an extra fifteen coins.
Mario: Fifteen coins? For what!?!
Pianta: Ten coins for replacing the glass and five for messing up my floor.
Mario: Why don't YOU clean it up, you cheap scammer?
Pianta: Because I don't get the money that way.
Mario: [rearing his fist back] You're not getting any money, but I WILL show you what you WILL get!!
The Pianta runs out of the shop, grabbing all his bags of money and making a go for it. Mario chases him out, slinging coconuts at him. They all miss. The Pianta goes out of sight. Mario stands in the middle of the beach and shrieks in anger as loud as he can.
FLUDD: Well, Mario? Did you have fun?
Mario: Listen, buddy, YOU are not helping!
FLUDD: Let me get this straight: In the mere fifteen minutes you were gone, you got sand in your shoes, got drenched with water, got scammed for fifty coins, turned all heads on the beach, and overall made a fool of yourself.
Mario: And if you were with me, would it have made any difference?
FLUDD: Probably. Your shoes would be missing, you'd have gotten caught in the riptide, you'd have lost a HUNDRED coins, you'd have turned all heads on the beach AND gotten the cops to come down, and made an even bigger fool of yourself. It's surprising, just how stupid one man can be.
Mario: When this whole adventure is over, I am going to tear you apart and throw you into the water at the highest cliff in Noki Bay.
Narrator: Yes, not the prettiest day then. Mario then followed FLUDD's advice and entered yet another "secret" level.
Mario: The sand blocks dissolve when I step on them! I'll use my Hover Nozzle!
Mario's Hover Nozzle instantly converts the sand into goopy mud. Mario's feet get stuck, and he falls to his death once the block had dissolved.
Narrator: But he got the Shine Sprite eventually. We are currently on episode 2, where Mario sees....
Mario: Apple-things!
Pianta: Those strange creatures are tilting the mirrors, and the giant Wiggler has curled up on the tower to take a nap! This could endanger the legendary Sand Bird egg!
Mario: Imagine the pies you could make with THOSE babies.
FLUDD: To get the Shine Sprite, you must defeat them all.
Mario: Sweet! Pianta, bring me my frying pan!
Pianta: I'm not doing anything! I'm just sitting back here, moaning about the Sand Bird while everybody else does the same thing, waiting for somebody else to do their jobs because work takes too much effort, like reaching into your pocket, grabbing your cell phone, and calling for help!
Mario: FLUDD, you wouldn't happen to have a cell phone installed, would you?
FLUDD: No.
Mario: Why does E. Gadd never install anything useful!?!
FLUDD uses his Idiot Stopper.
Mario: [through a mouthful of bubbles] I retht my cathe!
FLUDD: If you want the next Shine Sprite, you're going to have to defeat them yourself. The sooner you can get the Shine Sprites, the sooner you can get off the island, and the sooner you can supposedly dismantle me and throw me off a cliff.
Mario: Thoundth good. Let'th do it!
Mario arrives at the first mirror and grabs onto the edge. It tilts down instantly.
FLUDD: I believe you and your scale should have a little talk.
Mario: And I believe you should STOP talking.
Mario climbs on and looks at the single "apple-thing."
Mario: Now what?
FLUDD: To defeat the enemy, pat your head, rub your belly, and say the codeword: "Blue ravioli has been shot into the sky with a bazooka."
Mario: Why has blue ravioli been shot into the sky with a bazooka?
FLUDD: That's what he says next. Then you say, "Because kittens are attacking with space guns." Then he should leave.
Mario: Okay.
After a few tries, Mario pats his head, rubs his belly, and says the codeword. The creature stares at him.
Mario: Maybe I didn't say it loud enough. Blue ravioli has been shot into the sky with a bazooka!
Still no response.
Mario: BLUE RAVIOLI HAS BEEN SHOT INTO THE SKY WITH A BAZOOKA!!
Pianta: What kind of a stupid lunatic would believe a fool thing like that!?!
Mario: Oh. This isn't the codeword, is it? In fact, it's a BIG FAT LIE.
FLUDD: Of course it is. To defeat it, spray it towards the edge of the mirror, then pound on the opposite side. Or just stand there. I think either would work.
Mario: You are very cruel, FLUDD.
FLUDD: I know that.
Mario sprays the "apple-thing" to the mirror's edge, then walks to the other side.
Mario: Hey, Mirror's Edge! That was an interesting game!
Sure enough, all Mario has to do is stand on the opposite side, and the creature flies by at eight million miles per hour. Grimacing, he moves on to the next mirror and prepares to do the same thing. He sprays one creature to the edge and knocks it off. The other one smartens up, kicks Mario to the edge, and pounds on the mirror. Mario soars away in the blink of an eye.
Mario: AAAAHH!! Help me!!
Meanwhile, in the cockpit of an airplane....
Pilot: Looks like we'll be arriving at our destination in approximately--
A plumber suddenly splats into the plane.
Pilot: HOLY MOLEY!!!
Mario: AAAAHH! Get me off!!
Mario uses FLUDD's Hover Nozzle, lets the plane go by, and falls down, down, down....
Mario: FLUDD? Out of curiosity, just how high up are we?
FLUDD: Look down.
There is Isle Delfino in all its splendor. From the height he's at, it looks no bigger than his shoe. Mario screams for a good five minutes before he gets bored of screaming.
FLUDD: We're about halfway there now.
Mario: Great. If I had a DVD player, I'd probably pop in a movie and watch it. Get halfway through it before I hit the ground.
Five minutes later, the creature on the mirror is feeling very smug. It looks up and notices something falling. Before it can scream "GWAK!" at the top of its lungs, Mario slams into the mirror and sends the creature flying. Mario unpeels himself from the mirror, shakes his head, and stands up.
Mario: How far do you think that thing should fly?
FLUDD: At its current speed, it should make its way around the world twice before landing in the middle of an ocean.
Mario: We'll be hearing of some interesting events in the news, I can tell. Let's work on the last three.
Mario goes to the last three and sprays them all towards the edge. Mario jumps on the opposite side and sends them flying. The Shine Sprite appears.
Mario: Well, it took a lot of pain, but I finally got my Shine Sprite.
FLUDD: Yes. So go get it so that we can get out of here.
Mario: What's after this?
FLUDD: Fighting the giant Wiggler.
Mario: Urk!