Dramatic Voice: On the last epic episode of Mario Ball Z, Marioku went to the Island of Pinna to defeat the Turtles of Power. However, their might was too much for even the powerful Marioku, and Luigeta had to step in....
Luigeta: [in a deep, too-raspy-to-be-natural voice] You're a pitiful sight, Jumpmanot!
Dramatic Voice: Luigeta, with the aid of the injured Marioku, finally defeated the narcoleptic-yet-immensely-deadly Turtles of Power and saved the Yoshis of Pinna Island. But they still needed to find the rest of the Sprite Balls, and more danger was awaiting Pinna Park.... [voice returns to normal] But unfortunately, Mario Ball Z isn't real. Maybe another day. In reality, Mario just had to jump on the turtles to kill them. Which leaves us on episode five.
Mario: If I used enough hair gel, could I really become Marioku?
FLUDD: You could, but I would kill you.
Mario: I guess that's out the window, then.
Noki: Help! Help! The Ferris wheel is going out of control!
Mario notices the Ferris wheel spinning at a hundred miles per hour. He grins.
Mario: Can I, FLUDD?
FLUDD: I'll say it again: You could, but I would kill you. If the ride didn't finish you off first.
Mario: It isn't too bad, is it? If it's just spinning around and around, can't you fix it electrically somewhere?
Noki: We already have a guy trying to work on it.
A Pianta holding a toolbox and grabbing onto the edge of one of the seats of the Ferris wheel screams as he spins around at a hundred miles per hour. At last, he lets go and flies away into the distance.
Mario: That wasn't quite what I meant.
Noki: And to answer your question as to what would happen....
In the possible future, the Ferris wheel launches off the structure, floats into the air, crashes into Delfino Plaza, and blows up Isle Delfino. The destruction makes volcanoes erupt, earthquakes occur, buildings collapse, and the world eventually explodes.
Noki: So we can't let the Ferris wheel go like this for too long.
Mario: I see. How do we stop it?
Noki: There are some Electro-Koopas behind it messing it up. But I still think that flying meteor that crashed into it awhile ago was what messed it up.
Mario: Uh, no, definitetly the Electro-Koopas. So why didn't the worker go back there to fix it?
Noki: Because we're stupid, that's why.
Mario: And let me guess: It's up to me to fix it.
FLUDD: Of course. Now get going.
Mario: Sure. But first....
Mario rushes to the Ferris wheel, grabs onto one of the pods, and climbs in.
Mario: Woohoo! This is awesome!
FLUDD: Of all the people to have possibly found me, this guy had to.
Mario: Wheee--ulp...ugh...feel...dizzy....
FLUDD: And what did you think was going to happen?
Mario: Must...leave...ride....
Mario attempts to climb back out the window, but the whirling force keeps pushing him back in. He lies on the floor, feeling like he's going to die.
Mario: FLUDD...in case I don't make it...tell Pauline that I always loved her...and only left her because of Peach....
FLUDD: In other words, you found a prettier girl with lots of money.
Mario: But don't tell her that.
FLUDD: Too bad.
Mario: Don't let me die knowing my greatest secrets will be exposed, FLUDD.
FLUDD: Are you going to care when you're dead? Now get up and keep cleaning the island.
Mario: That's easy for you to say. You don't feel sick.
FLUDD: Of course I feel sick. Every second I have to spend with you.
Mario: I can see it written on my gravestone already... "He died being insulted by a machine...."
FLUDD: There's a Blooper in here.
Mario gets up immediately and dives out the window. He lands hard on the ground and swats himself all over.
Mario: Get it off me! Get it off me! Get it off me! Get it off me!
FLUDD: Relax. There's not actually a Blooper. I was just trying to get you out of the window.
Mario: FLUDD, don't scare me like that!
FLUDD: Mario, don't act stupid like that! What were you thinking, jumping into a speeding Ferris wheel pod like that, anyway?
Mario: I thought it would be fun.
FLUDD: But it wasn't.
Mario: No, it wasn't.
FLUDD: More evidence of your peanut-sized brain.
Mario: Whatever! How do I slow down the Ferris wheel?
FLUDD: There's a giant Electro-Koopa at the top of the Ferris wheel making it spin out of control. Also, they should take care of that nasty crack someone left in the middle of the wheel.
Mario: It wasn't my fault that cannon launched me too far.
FLUDD: But it was very funny.
Mario: Says you.
Mario walks around to the back of the Ferris wheel and stares at the Electro-Koopas climbing all over the metal fencing.
Mario: Right. So I climb up that, get to the top, and knock the Electro-Koopa off. Simple.
FLUDD: Dummy alert.
Mario: Where?
FLUDD: Very, very close.
Mario: Well, I'll worry about him later. Now, to start climbing!
Mario climbs up the metal grating until he meets up with an Electro-Koopa on the other side of the fence-like wall. He waves teasingly at it.
Mario: Well, hi, you little loser! Are you the dummy FLUDD was talking about?
The Electro-Koopa raises a tiny foot, then touches Mario's hand. He gets zapped instantly. Worse, his finger gets stuck in one of the holes, and he is continually shocked. His hair stands on end and catches fire.
Mario: Ow! Get off!
FLUDD: Spray water at it.
Mario: Good idea!
Mario sprays water at it, following FLUDD's false advice. Since water attracts electricity, the shocking is tripled, and Mario bursts into flame.
Mario: Aaah! More water! More water!
Mario sprays even more water, and instead of dampening the fire, it makes it worse. Finally, Mario yanks his hand free and splashes down on the watery ground, a smoking figure as the fire dissolves. He is completely black.
Mario: FLUDD, what's the next area we're going to?
FLUDD: Noki Bay.
Mario: Good, because THEN I GET TO KILL YOU!!!!!
FLUDD: If you would have just used your brain, you would have realized that water attracts electricity and would have made the situation worse. And the "dummy alert" I was referring to was you.
Mario: Forget it! Noki Bay isn't close enough!!!
Mario takes FLUDD off his back and walks up to the edge of the park, preparing to toss FLUDD into the water.
FLUDD: I never told you about my secretly-installed device, did I?
Mario: Oh, the Idiot Stopper? Yeah, sure, like I don't know all about that. Guess what? It doesn't matter how many times you use it! You're still going!!
FLUDD: I was referencing my OTHER secretly-installed device.
Mario: Huh?
FLUDD: The Self-Destructor. It means I blow up.
Mario: That's easily taken care of by throwing you away!
FLUDD: Is it? The Self-Destructor's power is equal to that of ten nuclear warheads going off in one spot.
Mario frowns and lowers FLUDD.
Mario: You're lying about this, aren't you?
FLUDD: Better to be safe than sorry.
Mario grudgingly puts FLUDD back on and walks toward the Ferris wheel.
Mario: Fine. Why does E. Gadd never install anything helpful?
FLUDD: Because his secret ambition is to rule the world.
Mario: I knew it.
FLUDD: Why do you think he babbles nonsense? It's because he wants everyone to believe he's crazy.
Mario: He IS crazy.
Mario climbs up the metal fence and punches an Electro-Koopa off. He continues climbing up until he meets several Electro-Koopas. The Electro-Koopas look at each other as if confirming a secret code, nod their heads, then gang up on Mario and beat him up.
Mario: FLUDD! What do I do?
FLUDD: Use my Self-Destructor!
Mario: Oh, heck no!
FLUDD: Good. You've passed the test.
Mario: Seriously, these guys are beating the crap out of me! What do I do?
FLUDD: You use martial arts and beat them all up.
Mario lets out a high-pitched shriek, and the Electro-Koopas jump back, startled. Mario begins moving his hands in slow, strange movements.
Mario: Uuuuaaaaaeeeeeaaaaaaaeeeee....
Mario lunges at them all and kicks, karate chops, and punches his way to victory. The Electro-Koopas fall to the ground below, unconscious.
FLUDD: I didn't know you actually knew martial arts.
Mario: I don't. I just kinda improvised.
Mario shrugs, then continues his climb up. He makes it to the top, where he sees a huge, sleeping Electro-Koopa. Mario grabs onto the railing beneath it and kicks at it. It doesn't budge. Instead, it wakes up and turns slowly to Mario with the angriest expression he's seen in his life.
Giant Electro-Koopa: AAAAHH!!! I have been awakened from my slumber by a midget in overalls! I EAT MIDGETS IN OVERALLS FOR BREAKFAST!!!!
Mario: Well, I'm sure we could talk things over peacefully if you wanted to do that....
Giant Electro-Koopa: I shall fry you with the Lightning of Doom and keep your smoking ashes in a jar to show everyone the midget in overalls who challenged me! AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Just as easily as it woke up, it goes back to sleep and starts snoring. Mario tries to make his heart calm down before he passes out.
Mario: Well, that was scary.
FLUDD: I would start working on some push-ups, Mario.
Mario climbs up in front of the Electro-Koopa, then pushes it closer and closer to the edge. Finally, it falls off and lands in the ocean. Since, of course, water attracts electricity, a HUMUNGOUS explosion of electricity blasts through the water and kills all fish around Pinna Island. The Shine Sprite appears, and Mario rides the Ferris wheel up to get it.
Mario: I certainly had to go through a lot to get this one. But at least now I know there are TWO secretly-installed devices instead of one.
FLUDD: That's what you think.
Mario: I'm going to choose to ignore that and pretend I never heard it.
Later, in Delfino Plaza, Mario is watching the TV through the electronic store's window....
Reporter: Another strange series of events happened today. A Pianta carrying a toolbox was seen flying over Pianta Village at high speed. No one knows how he got launched into the air, but whatever launched him launched him far. Also, the Ferris wheel in Pinna Park went out of control after an eight hundred pound meteorite hit it and gave it a severe crack. The Ferris wheel was fixed recently, however. And a disturbing event happened around Pinna Island where the same madman who murdered the Sand Bird killed all the fish and underwater life with an electrical explosion. There is now a TWO million coin bounty on his head, and it has been stated that his death will be by listening to Ike say "You'll get no sympathy from me" over and over again until he dies. Back to you, Edward.
Mario: An eight hundred pound meteorite?
Pianta: That's what it said. And the Death-By-Ike torture? That's bad, man. The only thing that beats it is Death-By-Captain-Falcon, where you listen to him say "Yes" over and over again.
Mario: Has anyone ever been given the Death-By-Ike sentence?
Pianta: Not yet, but it's effective at forcing enemies to give up information. They usually give in after twenty seconds or so. It's the thought of listening to it for hours that bothers them.
Mario: Uh, sounds painful. Well, I've got to go now.