The Visit

Severus wiped the tears from his eyes and attempted to reinstate his usual contemptuous glare but the thought of Lily prevented this from happening and so he settled for a more accurate, slightly frustrated at being disturbed glower and slowly opened the heavy door.

There stood, surprise surprise, Hermione Granger. It couldn't have been more than five minutes since he had sent his reply yet there she was, nosy as ever, expecting an explanation to something that had absolutely nothing to do with her. How dare she interrupt his time with Lily, how dare she turn up at his door step expecting him to welcome her with open arms, that insolent girl, that insufferable swine. He had never felt more disdain towards anyone in his entire life and then she spoke and somehow his anger simply withered away as quickly as it had come, replaced by a distant feeling of irritation. Her face held a sort of unwanted knowledge that she would do anything to get rid of and when she spoke her voice broke slightly, although he wouldn't find out why until much later.

"Professor?"

That was all she had to say to force a justification from him. More than anything he wanted to tell someone and, however much he didn't want to admit it, she was probably the most likely to be at least somewhat civil towards him, which was more than could be said for the other two. He spoke with a sort of desperation that she could see in the depths of black eyes and his sallow cheeks, the kind of infinite sadness that never goes away no matter how much time passes.

"I had given him everything he needed to defeat Voldemort, there was nothing more I could do in the state I was in, all I could do was wait for the cure to set in, surely you can understand?"

He didn't quite know why he needed her approval and neither did she but she gave it to him nonetheless, hating to see the man who had been so detestably strong as long as she could remember falling apart so completely.

"Of course..."

It was a moment or two before she found the courage to say what she was thinking but she was nothing if not courageous.

"But the resurrection stone, sir, I think..."

His low voice vibrated threateningly through the small amount of air between them and stopped her in her tracks; there was no way he would give up Lily for any reason whatsoever and he had to make this clear.

"Nothing you say will change my mind, Miss Granger, and it's not your concern so if you'll please..."

He tried to close the door but she put her foot out, now pleading with him in her soft, angelic way.

"I know how much Lily meant to you, sir, and I know how hard it must be to let her go..."

He interrupted her once again in a tone that left no room for dispute.

"No, you don't, because if you truly understood you wouldn't ask me to. Now Miss Granger, if you would kindly remove your foot from my doorway it would be very much appreciated."

She did as he said but not before whispering in a low, threatening voice.

"I'll be back tomorrow, you can count on that."

He could not find it within himself to be afraid, she was, after all, many, many years younger than him and much less powerful but still he felt a distinct sense of dreadful anticipation that would simply not go away, however hard he tried to force it to. Only one person could make this feeling go away completely; Lily. He ran up the stairs two at a time, all sense of dignity and pride gone with the prospect of seeing Lily whenever he wished. The cold, hard stone was held within his hand in seconds and she stood in front of him once again, her sad eyes staring into his and her soft voice speaking almost instantly with a desperate longing that was not directed at him.

"Where is my Harry, Sev? Where is he?"

Snape sighed slightly but answered her question with the growing awareness that he would always be second best to the golden boy, but also the understanding that it was better to have her and be second best than not to have her at all.

"He's safe, Lily, he won."

She smiled for the first time since he had brought her back and the cause of this happiness was meaningless to him because she was happy.

"I thought he was going to die, Sev, oh I'm so infinitely glad, will you tell me what happened?"

And so the next few hours were spent explaining everything he knew about Harry's life so far, starting at his first year and ending a few days ago. Although the boy was thoroughly detestable to him, it was so worth it to see Lily's face when he spoke of her son, her joy at giving life to such a heroic boy. It was hard for Severus to speak in Harry's favour, seeing the events of the last seven years in the boys eyes rather than his own but by the end of it he had tears in his eyes because, after all this time, his protecting the boy had finally paid off as without it he wouldn't have the resurrection stone and consequently wouldn't have Lily.

When the story ended, a sad mask fell over her face again and she spoke in an almost whisper, one that Severus would wish he hadn't heard.

"I want to see him."