Continuity: Set during Compromising positions (series 7 ep 12) Set during the second Jill and Nick conversation.
Song:
Comment: Jill and Nick, hint of Gordonness. Some lines are from the conversation itself, thanks to ITV.
"I should have allowed myself more time to grieve for what I lost really," Jill said, wiping a tear from her already red eyes.
"I'm sorry Jill. You spoken to Gordon?" Nick asked, looking at her with that sympathetic look. The same look was also very good at getting answers.
"Yes. We've talked. Poured our hearts out on more than one occasion. I tell him what he wants to hear. He thinks it's all ok. He thinks we're fine. He thinks I'm fine. I.. I don't want him to see me as weak"
Nick couldn't help but give her that look again. The 'I'm listening and It's ok' look.
" Hence the crusade for premature babies? It's your way of dealing with things?" All Jill could do was look at him, thinking, dreaming.
"All the specialist units in the world.. I'm never going to have another baby am I?"
"I'm so sorry Jill"
"It's never going to happen. It's all he ever wanted. A family. A proper family. It was our dream. Well.. Mainly his. It's what he wanted. And I can't give it to him." She looked over at Nick, who smiled sympathetically. He barely knew her. Yet somehow her words had touched him, in a way he'd never imagined. He knew she had this side to her, but had never thought he'd see it infrront of him.
She tried to fight back the tears, knowing that Gordon's general surgical ward should get the money. He saved her life. He meant everything.
"This is such a generous bequest I think it is up to us to make the most of it don't you?" She asked, again fighting back the tears. Nick nodded, smiling. It didn't take long for him to work her out.
"Jill… if I've upset you… I didn't mean…" Jill smiled, albeit with a tinge of sadness.
"It's ok. Really" She replied, knowing that Nick didn't mean to. After all, he'd only known her for a short time. Yet they got on well. She liked him, trusted his judgement. Trusted him.
"Just promise me one thing"
"What's that?" Jill asked, curious of what Nick was going to ask.
"Talk to Gordon. He should know exactly how you're feeling. Or… I could for you." Jill shook her head.
"No… I'll do it. He deserves that much"
"Yes… he does. I'll speak to him later" Jill said, realizing what the time was.
"I'd best be getting back" Jill said, getting up and walking back into the hospital, Nick still sitting there, watching her walk away.
I wonder if she will speak with him. If only there was something more I could do to help. She walked off ok, so maybe talking helped. Maybe she's feeling better now.